Welcome to “Baby… What Do You Think?” where fashion faux pas are taken to task and sartorial excellence is championed! Clutch is crazy (like a fox!) for giving these two a forum to take their fashion commentary, usually delivered at home in front of the tv to each other and their Chihuahua named Angel, to the masses, saying exactly what you’re thinking, but are too couth and refined to say out loud! A Brooklyn-based couple, Filthy is a New York-born, loud mouth, aspiring music impresario with a penchant for Funkadelic, Barker Blacks and fancy ties and Kristy is a professional spindoctor with Southern roots, a vintage clothing junkie and an inherited shoe fetish.
Rihanna Filthy: I dig the look. I’m for anything that has her stepping away from the bad girl image. Kristy: The dress and accessories are cute but I don’t know how I feel about the Foghorn Leghorn hair style.
Taraji P. Henson Kristy: I don’t know why she’s wearing those. Filthy: Are her feet bound in suede?? Is she doing some couture geisha thing? Kristy: Her left foot looks janky. Is it broken? Is she trying to make the best out of a bad situation with a green suede ankle cast? That’s the only explanation for those atrocious shoes with that outfit. What the hell?
Toni Braxton Filthy: She looks like she spent the entire night keeping her dress from sliding down. Kristy: When make-up overpowers your look, you risk going a bit tranny. A tranny midget in a sack.
Shar Jackson Kristy: Oh boy. She is really feeling herself in those clodhoppers. Filthy: She does have this “I’m the shit” look on her face, huh? Kristy: Well, the way her and Papazao hustled Britney, I guess she feels like she earned that smug smile she’s rocking.
Ashanti Filthy: She’s so thrilled to be competing in this year’s Little Miss Sunshine child beauty pageant! Kristy: Why is she wearing Spanx as a skirt with a bustier?
Aisha Tyler Filthy: I’m not mad at the dress but the accessories are really throwing me off. Is it just me or are her bag and shoes really distracting? Kristy: Very distracting. More distracting are the fins on her shoes.
Beyonce Filthy: Beyonce can still fit into her 5th grade dance rehearsal outfit!? Kristy: That’s just not flattering at all .. But maybe that’s “Sasha Fierce” and not Beyonce .. Groan.
Melanie Brown Filthy: What’s with the collar?! What’s with the collar?! Is that a saint halo?? Kristy: There’s way too much going on with that dress. There’s a hood-collar thing, there’s boobs, there’s a zipper, there’s boobs, there’s pockets and then there’s more boobs. That’s a lot … of boobs. Filthy: Really? I hadn’t noticed the boobs.
Meagan Good Kristy: She looks like the bad Sandra Dee from Grease after she became a Pink Lady. Filthy: Are those tattooed eyebrows??
Michelle Williams Filthy:Jiminy Cricket has the sloppiest bodyguard ever! Kristy: His face reflects how I feel about that outfit. Filthy: I want to see her wearing his suit.
Queen Latifah Filthy: Why is she flexing?? Kristy: Those look like fat skinny jeans! The bottoms are so loose. Filthy: It looks like she has someone behind her pretending to be her arms.
Zoe Kravitz Filthy: Yeah, sometimes she looks a damn mess, but she’s so damn adorable. Kristy: She really is. I want to pinch her cheeks and make her a grilled cheese sammich.
Garcelle Beauvais Filthy: When H&M goes wrong. Kristy: Can she run a steamer over her crotch? Please?
Elise Neal Filthy: Latex! Trojans makes dresses?? Kristy: She looks like a popped party balloon.
Tichina Arnold Filthy: That Martin money must have run out cause I never thought I’d see her getting her S&M on. Kristy: I bet she’s all types of sweaty under all that leather.
Michelle Williams Kristy: She looks like Storm from X-Men .. she’s gonna blow away ANY second now. Filthy: Is this her best Rihanna impression? Kristy: She looks like she was playing dress up in Rihanna’s closet.
Kelis Filthy: Does she just not care anymore?? Kristy: She knows she looks a mess .. look at the look on her face. And white panty hoes are very rarely acceptable .. and this is not one of those occasions!
Alicia Keys Filthy: That coat is so DOPE! Kristy: Give me that coat, stat .. that’s a badass outfit, top to bottom.
Halle Berry Filthy: She looks so stumpy .. Kristy: She’s gorgeous but her waistline is so low with that belt and top that it makes her torso look too long and not in a good way.
Ashanti Filthy: Damn. Ashanti’s a buzz cut away from looking like crazy Britney Spears. Kristy: Is that an airbrushed sweatsuit?! Filthy: Not sure, but matching sweatsuits are not a good look. Kristy: Either way, tragic.
ROTFLMAO!!! You guys are too much. Rihanna’s face is blah, Beyonce looks fat in that outfit but Alicia Keys is on point!!!!! Michelle Williams in way too thin. What happened to her. I used to think she was the most beutiful girl when she first joined DC.
you guys are amazing critics, all the reason why I come to the fashion section to hear your advice.
ROTFLMAO!!! You guys are too much. Rihanna’s face is blah, Beyonce looks fat in that outfit but Alicia Keys is on point!!!!! Michelle Williams in way too thin. What happened to her. I used to think she was the most beutiful girl when she first joined DC.
You are so right Kristy, that is a bad outfit that Alicia Key’s has on!!
Yeah, wow, Michelle Williams looks like she could use a slice of cake.
Also, I <3 Zoe Kravitz!!!
Whoa. Michelle Williams needs to roll around in some fat back or something. Feed yourself girl!
You guys are tooo much. I’m laughing so hard at the first Michelle Williams post I can barely type. And Queen Latifah, oh my goodness…
Ok she’s cute, but does Zoe Kravitz have on ‘MOM JEANS’..Wow
Okay, the commentary on Michelle Williams {both} had me LOL but the Queen Latifah critique had me damn near tearing up. Ya’ll silly! :-)
“A tranny midget in a sack”
I peed just a little. Ok, not really, but this was hilarious!
Funny funny stuff..yall are on the ball every time!
Again, hilarious.
*Dead* @ the MichelleWilliams/Jimmety Crickett comparison.
Alicia was rocking that outfit, indeed… LOL! You guys are still hilarious w/ the critiques, seriously.
Thank you! I enjoyed myself – LOL BTW I want Alicia’s coat too damn that is a badass coat aka She did that!
Kudo’s Alicia Keys… the rest of em… YUCK! ;p