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What’s in a Name?

Monday Mar 9, 2009 – by

79214450Congratulations – you’re having a baby! Now through all the changes going on with your life and body (ugh!), you’ve got a grand task ahead of you: Whatever will we name this little bundle of joy?

For many families, a baby name is the least of anyone’s concerns during this exciting time. It was decided long ago that you and your spouse would keep the family tradition going strong by passing on the names of your elders. [Sidenote: Both of my middle names belong to my grandmothers, so I’m all too familiar with this one.] Or perhaps you’ll just take the safe route. I suppose there’s nothing wrong with another little Ashley or Brittany, Justin or Anthony – right? I guess.

But for others, the naming process is the time to finally express one’s innermost most creative desires. The world is yours and you’ve made up your mind that you’re gonna get funky with it! If your baby is going to be the superstar that you always dreamed of becoming, he or she will have to have a name that sets them apart from the rest. Uh huh, they’re going to be unique, alright.

Sometimes, though, things don’t turn out so great. Not for the child, at least. Here are a few common “uh-oh” errors that occur in our community when it comes to naming our newborns.

The 7 [Potentially] Deadly Sins of Baby Naming:

Now on a more serious note, as entertaining as the conversation of baby names can get, the social implications of these decisions are very serious and long lasting. Keep in mind that your child will have to spell this name everyday for the rest of their life. Is it something that can be sounded out, or even remembered for that matter? Also, I’m sure you remember your grade school days. Children are very cruel, so let’s hope we’re not giving our kids a name that will make them the constant subject of humility and shame. And of course, as little boys and girls become grown men and women, they will need to find a job. Will this name be the cause for instant résumé rejection or discrimination in the workplace? Some things to think about.

We all know that you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover – or title, in this case. But the sad truth is: people do it everyday. If you or anyone else you know has been set up in the name game, let’s stop the cycle here and help a baby out! They’ll appreciate you for it in the long run.

34 Comments – Add Yours

  1. avatar Teneice says:

    I have this conversation often. In my hometown (good thing I know longer live there) interracial dating/baby-making (not marriage) is like an epidemic. What I have noticed is that white women there almost always give their child some unpronounceable accent filled name in effort to make their child more “urban or black”. All the while their name is Ashley, Jennifer or Heather.

    I don’t think these parents realize what they are doing to their children when it comes to their chances in the working world. I was talking to the owner of my company and he mentioned that he knows exactly what race the person is before he even meets a potential employee just based on the name at the top of the resume.

    I think when we name our children we have to remember that while a certain name may sound cute as a toddler, they will be adults a lot longer than they are children so give them an appropriate name.

  2. avatar Edie Ress says:

    Ladies, please read and heed. It’s killing us in the workplace (and actually
    hurting us in job selection according to real studies), in social settings,
    and in simple day-to-day interface. What’s cute, clever, and meaningful
    at the time can come back to haunt little “Maliaschaobama Brooks.” Lighten
    up on these names and think beyond the moment. Yes, I did hear “Viagra, what did I tell you?” in a Maryland discount store. Stop the madness!!

  3. avatar Janee Michele says:

    What is the matter with being creative and naming a child a name that may be indicative of coming from our community?
    I disagree wholeheartedly. I believe most people only have the BEST intentions when naming their child. No matter how insane the pronunciation or spelling. I believe black people are always the HARDEST on themselves. I understand the idea that there may be a (very) slight negative influence on future employment, but it’s just that, slight. Keep in mind, there are plenty of folks who are discriminated against for more than JUST a name. There is gender bias, sexuality bias, culture bias, alot of which can not be determined by name alone. Not to mention if getting a job is the biggest concern, it is not against the law to change your name for that purpose. Plenty of our Asian and Indian brethren have done just that to pseudo assimilate without giving up or forgetting what their parents gave them from the heart.
    If the issue is cruel kids, well we need to teach our children tolerance. That the world is made of all kinds of people and that its the make up of our character that is important and not the spelling or pronunciation of our names. Besides, cruel children find a way, any way, to be cruel no matter your name. I think the bigger issue is cruel adults.
    Ultimately naming your child Madison or Becky, Cliff or John doesnt make your kid any better then someone who chose otherwise.
    Do yourself and everyone else a favor and lighten up on your simple mindedness. For the record, I have no children but if I did, I would not have a problem naming my kid something that may indicate their heritage. I enjoy being Black, and enjoy other’s knowing it as well.
    Thank you for your time.

  4. avatar Edie Ress says:

    Janee: Easy to say when you have a name as beautiful as yours. Try living with “Viagra.” BTW, I don’t see this as race-driven commentary. I’m sure there must be a white “Cialis” somewhere. Don’t think the writer was suggesting that white or Anglo names were indicative of superiority of the choser or the chosen, but that a number of factors (other than I just liked it) might be taken into consideration before making a lifelong pronouncement. For the record, I had a white assistant who was named “Money” because her mom went into labor at the bank. She herself joked about being grateful to the almighty that mommy wasn’t on the toilet. Peace!

  5. avatar Janee Michele says:

    What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet…
    -W. Shakespeare

    Edie: Thank you for the compliment. With it, I think you hit the nail right on the head. I believe most people allow their personal opinions to get in the way. The issue isn’t that some folks name their children improperly, it’s that other folks don’t like them for whatever reason. I am not by any means saying I agree with everyone’s choices all the time, bit I do believe in the old adage, if you have nothing nice to say then say nothing at all.

    And I have relatives and close friends with names such as God, Prince, Shammquana, Earth, and Quinneisha. I never take for granted the pride that their parents had in naming their babies. I actually appreciate the effort that people take to create a story the is uniquely and exclusively theirs. I don’t see the error in that.

    For the record the writer did elude to race with the line… “Here are a few common “uh-oh” errors that occur in our community when it comes to naming our newborns.” She went on to demonstrate where having an inappropriate name would be problematic; for school children and seeking employment. Both of which I addressed in my previous response. There aren’t a ‘number’ of factors, there are two that the writer pointed out. The only other factor seems to be opinion. And opinions like, well you know…, we’ve all got one.

    Thanks for taking the time to hear me out Edie…
    Be well. Janee

  6. avatar B says:

    When naming your children it is very important to remember who will one day be giving them jobs…I tell my students all the time that there is a such thing as naming your child into the welfare system. You don’t have to agree, because its my opinion, but I see it happen often. There is a such thing as being both creative and aware…

  7. avatar Tres Tres DC PR says:

    Wow B. My thoughts exactly.

  8. avatar Pearlsrevealed says:

    I don’t want to rain on the Quinneisha’s of the world but the meaning of your name is EXTREMELY important spiritually and economically.

    Spiritually, a name can propel your destiny or hinder it (re: Bible stories–Abram to Abraham “father of many nations” or Jacob “deceiver” to Israel “God preserves, may God reign”.

    Letters have a numerical value & vibrations and, in the original language, yields a meaning that carries weight in the spirit realm. I strongly suggest that if a parent wants something unique then choose a REAL name from a culture and peoples that may not be common in our culture and spell it EXACTLY the way it is has been spelled historically by that culture or the established English translation of the name. And please make sure you know what the name means.

    Economically… well as a hiring manager I know that if a name screams “I am black AND I don’t care about the rules of English grammar” who won’t even get an interview with some companies.

    After hiring an employee named Tiabria (pronounced **tee-ah-bree-uh** which I think is a cute), my white boss told me not to hire people with names she could not pronounce!

    So, Quinneisha, no offense but if you happen to have a common middle name like Sarah, then I suggest that you use it as a first name on your application to increase your chances of employment. Otherwise, use your creativity to start your own business.

  9. As you may have noticed, I have a very unique first and last name and I am honored beyond measure to have it. My late-aunt named me and I certainly believe everything has its reason. Yes, in some cultures “Tane” can mean a god/goddess of the forest and “kea” an asian flower. I do believe in the spiritual sense of naming your child something with meaning; but if it is symbolic to something that manifested in the parents’ lives it therefore has meaning. I simply believe that my name has never kept me from a job nor has it been a problem for me. Have people been unable to pronounce it yes! I simply state, “It’s pretty easy being that its phonetic.” In general I have always gotten whatever I desired and what was in God’s perfect will for my life…not once have I had an interview and not been hired. People have stated over time that my name or when I cut my hair and decided to go natural that my locs would hinder me. Only then did I notice that people set unbelievable limitations on themselves because of what they buy into. I say to them, “Why fly when you can soar!” Speak over your own lives and never let anyone dictate how far you can go…name your destiny.

  10. avatar Kamikak says:

    I agree with Pearlsrevealed. People have the ability to name their children whatever they like but I think names are prophetic and when spoken carry a lot of power. Parents would be doing their children a great honor to give them names, anglican or not, that would bless them everytime their name is spoken.

  11. avatar Nikia says:

    you should repost this article for good measure month after month cuz I swear I cringe at the names I hear all the time…I’m all for cultural names or ones that have meaning but some people go entirely way too far…..and I’m speaking mainly on the names with 20 letters and 9 syllables….In those cases, they should be left to middle names…or nicknames…

  12. avatar Ma Red says:

    I’m naming my future kids Alabama aka Abbie (for a girl) & Youngblood (for a boy)

    I don’t care what anybody says.

  13. avatar Tiffany W. says:

    Why not Abbie? And what if Youngblood lives to be 94 years old? These are questions you should consider.

  14. avatar Ma Red says:

    he’ll be 94 with youngblood. I’m through explaining to folks. I’m stuck on these names. Abbie is too plain for me, but works as nickname

  15. avatar Yoshi says:

    I support this article. We have to be mindful when naming our children. Seriously. Be mindful and remember they have to live with the name NOT you!

  16. avatar lilia says:

    I support Tanekayas view, What if Obama decided not to run for president because his name rhymed with Osama? I also agree with the vchoosing a cultural name that has meaning and blessing. As an African I must say that we run gamut with difficult to pronounce names but that hasnt stopped those who believe in themselves from getting success.

  17. avatar Janee Michele says:

    Lillia, I think you make a valid point. A name doesnt stop people from doing well or going further than other’s expectations of them.
    Nina posted an interesting link. You may draw your own conclusions, but ultimately in spite of what the world thinks, This lady has thrived! As a matter of fact she’s a Dr. or at least soon to be. And her name hasn’t stopped her from getting work.
    Get over yourself Pearls. Most people do not take into consideration the numerical value of a name even with the most mundane of names. Seriously! And that was ONE boss, in ONE company, in your city, state, location, whatever. And AGAIN, I mentioned in (not one) TWO previous submissions that plenty of folks with difficult to understand or pronounce names from other Asian and Indian countries regularly change there names for something easier to understand. It does not mean that they feel less about their given names. I even suggest it. I think it’s an amazing and creative temporary solution for anyone. However, I am not as condescending to believe that people should or should not express themselves because of how I feel about it.
    And Quinneisha does exist in my life and despite how you feel about it, she will be fine. Along with Shammquana, Precious, Freedom, and Prince. Love yourself…

  18. avatar ceecee says:

    I think the most important thing is knowing the meaning and value of your name.
    When I was younger, I wanted to switch to my middle name that was much shorter and easier to pronounce. My full name is eleven letters long and is actually a sentence – God gives children. Now that I’m older and wiser, I thank God everyday for giving my parents the wisdom to give me my name and like someone said, when people say my name they are speaking a blessing into my life.

    But as everyone has said, on the job your qualifications should speak for itself. Your impeccable appearance should speak for itself. A lot of people associate “ghetto-fab” names with “ghetto-fab” people. Be that person that bucks the norm and changes the game.

  19. avatar tanyetta says:

    GREAT POST!!!!! :)

    I’m expecting a baby in May.

    I’m STRESSED out on this baby name thing.

    Hopefully by May, we’ll come up with something we can agree on.

    p.s. growing up, i was TEASED about my name. now, i get compliments on it. so, go figure.

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