MTV Airs Controversial Abortion Special

by Britni Danielle

Last night, MTV aired “No Easy Decision,” a spin-off of the popular reality series, “16 and Pregnant.” The special follows “16 and Pregnant” alum Markai as she struggles with the decision to have an abortion after unexpectedly becoming pregnant for the second time.

Unlike some who use abortion as a form of birth control, Markai and her boyfriend claim they were using contraception when she became pregnant again.

“I just never knew [the Depo-Provera] ran out,” Markai recalls. “They give you a time limit to get the shot again. [It's] like days-days, so I thought I had time. I guess not.”

“No Easy Decisions” does not glamorize abortion, if anything it shows how much of a gut-wrenching decision deciding to terminate a pregnancy can be.  The show takes an in-depth look at the outcomes of unplanned pregnancies and shows Markai researching her options. During the show she consults her partner, James, her friends, her mom and several counselors. She does not come to the decision to terminate her pregnancy lightly, and the show captures the gravity of the situation.

Despite her apprehension, Markai and James ultimately decide to go through with the abortion because they do not want their daughter, one-year-old Za’karia, to suffer because of the financial burden involved in raising two children. In the special, Markai says that no one is ever “pro-abortion,” but sometimes women “have to do what’s right” in order to be a responsible adult.

Expectedly, MTV’s decision to air the special came under fire by pro-life groups even before the show hit the airwaves. Conservative pro-life blogger Jill Stanek argues that although MTV claimed to present the issue from all sides, no “pro-life” groups were included in the special.

“According to Entertainment Weekly, MTV’s December 28 abortion reality show ‘will tackle all sides of the issue,’ ” Stanek writes. “This apparently means the pro-life perspective will simply get tackled. The new website, 16 and Loved, sponsored by the pro-abortion group Exhale, states that MTV collaborated with it for the program.”

Although Stanek positions Exhale as a “pro-abortion” group, it is decidedly apolitical. Exhale offers non-judgemental support to women who’ve had an abortion. Their aim is to provide support and resources to help women and their families deal with the difficult emotional repercussions of terminating a pregnancy.

Abortion is a hot-button issue that continues to divide. No matter which side of the debate you fall on, “No Easy Decision” shed new light on a part of the issue—teen abortions—that few get to see.

Watch an extended clip from “No Easy Decisions” and share your thoughts.

  • Jencendiary

    I salute this young woman’s bravery & honesty.

  • sunshyne84

    I’m just glad that she had a lot of support. A lot of pregnant teens are forced to get abortions because their own parents are angry. No one really gives them a voice on the matter. Abortions happen a lot more often that you would think and women should be able to talk about it instead of carrying that guilt and shame with them throughout their lives.

  • Miss Jae

    Wow…That was intense! Those are some brave women & I tip my hat to them!

  • S.

    Um.. WOW.

    How could anyone “salute” someone for killing their unborn child due to their own irresponsibility?

    BEYOND silly is what this is!
    I knew NOT to have sex when I was a teenager because of the possibility of getting pregnant and raising up a child, poor, like myself or the worst alternative–abortion! This train of thought was not that hard one to come by… so why is it soooo difficult for most people? Million dollar question!

    And the way people act about abortion these days… “pretending” that it’s a difficult decision. If it really is a difficult and decision don’t you think more people would do what they could to prevent themselves from going through it… no? Maybe the desire for sex is much stronger than the horrific thought of aborting your child! Maybe “difficult” isn’t the right word… maybe “unpleasant” is a better fit.

    This may sound cold and harsh but people need to SUCK IT UP! This is a LIFE this girl (and millions of others) are aborting!

    How about we start “saluting” people like me, people who’ve taken the ultimate precaution (abstinence) to prevent themselves from doing something to their own body that they would never in a million years do to their own dog!

    People who are abstinent NEVER get the “salute”. All they get are laughs for ‘not gettin some’. This is our culture, it’s twisted isn’t it?

    There are a million shows on television whose target audience is the teenager and all these shows do is promote sex (Gossip Girl, Vampire Diaries, Pretty Little Liars, Greek, etc,) and society has the nerve to wonder why teenage pregnancy and abortion rates are so high!

    I’m gonna take the time to SALUTE all the tweens/teens/young adults who have decided to NOT mess around with their future and the future of their unborn children by playing it safe and practicing abstinence! It’s not easy but don’t give up!


    I think you are on the harsh side but overall I agree with you. It is pure selfishness and they try to pass it off as if they are doing what is best for the unborn child… I never understood why people who don’t want children have unprotected sex and think they won’t get pregnant? Her excuse is bs…

  • Cass

    I just wanted to say four things:

    1. I DO applaud your abstinence. I always salute women and men who decide not to have sex until they are completely sure they can be ready for the consequences. It is the ONLY surefire way to prevent the problems, financial strain, and heartache that pregnancy and STIs can bring.

    2. I DO NOT applaud your judgement. I understand your strong feelings about the issue, but you have not been in the shoes of the women who have gone through these things, therefore you cannot speak for them and their feelings.

    3. No one here is saluting abortions. What they are saluting is the courage to speak about their decisions and struggles with them amidst societal backlash and comments like the ones you have made.

    4. Teen pregnancy rates in the United States are actually falling. Not only are they falling, they are at the lowest rate they’ve been since the 1940′s.

    I am not trying to change your mind, I just hope that I can convince you not to be so quick to demonize these women who feel they have no other choice because you don’t agree. I suggest having a conversation with a woman who has made this choice and try to listen and understand why. I’d also suggest looking up the history of abortion in the United States to understand the reasons why Roe v. Wade was instituted in the first place.

  • Jessica R McJunkins

    Until you know what it is like to be in this position, for whatever reason that may be (which is also not for you to judge), you should keep your puritanical, unrealistic, repressed comments to yourself.

    Bravo for this young woman to have the courage to open up about such a highly sensitive subject on national television.

    Pathetic people like you are embarrassing to intelligent, empathetic women everywhere. I pity you.

  • RT

    Abortion will always be a controversial issue. Unfortunately, it is always the women that are in the ‘line of fire’ whether they decide to have the child or not. @Cass I totally agree with your last statement about the history of abortion in the U.S. If you go online, you can actually find advertisements in 18th century U.S. newspapers advertising abortifacients.
    Archaeologists have even found ancient religious texts (Jewish, Islam) that not only condoned the practice, but had ‘how-to’ directions as to how to perform one. My own 110 year old grandmother (who is West Indian), knows about various herbs and teas that can end pregnancy. If you look at the history of abortion on a global scale, the decision to end a pregnancy was something that was handled by the woman and her female relatives or a midwife. The U.S. is one of the only countries that politicizes such a personal decision.

  • sloane

    jessica r mcjunkins-YES! are you walking around in my mind? it’s entirely unrealistic to expect all teenagers to abstain from sex. should it be presented to them as an option? yes, but they should be informed of all the CHOICES they have available to them should they choose to engage in sexual intercourse. why should people be shamed for having sex or having abortions? it’s reality of life.

  • sloane

    jessica r mcjunkins- are you walking around in my mind? it’s entirely unrealistic to expect all teenagers to abstain from sex. should it be presented to them as an option? yes, but they should be informed of all the CHOICES they have available to them should they choose to engage in sexual intercourse. why should people be shamed for having sex or having abortions? it’s reality of life.

  • sloane

    i’m not seeing where the “pro-life” or anti-choice as i like to call them, should have ANY part of this conversation. as far as i’m concerned their role in this dialogue has always been to limit choice and options for women and obsfucate education on this issue. their movement has also fostered self-righteous sanctimonious extremists who harass people outside of abortion and family planning clinics and attack doctors. i’m tired of these irrational, puritanical assholes and wish they would get lives and go away. and btw, where are they when all of these unwanted children get dumped into the foster care system or need to be adopted? or when some of these children end up living in low income areas on welfare? oh that’s right, nowhere to be found.

  • secretaddy

    So ignore the trolls guys, As Dr. Drew said on the issue about 1 in 3 teen pregnancies the U.S. lead to an abortion. SO while “S” up there is spewing judgmental bullshit I will say this. You don’t like abortion then DON’T support ineffective birth control policies like ABSTINENCE !! IT’s bullshit AND it’s proven time and time again NOT TO WORK !!! Support comprehensive sex education for your kids SO that they don’t get pregnant and thus are less incined to have an abortion

    As for S up there, no one cares u are abstinent, what u want a cookie?? lol Ok but for real, ppl that brag abt their abstinence annoy me. No one cares that u are sexually repressed.

  • Blaire

    Wow, it must be lonely up there on your abstinence pedestals, because you are clearly living in a world isolated from everyone else.

    I support and applaud these girls for coming forward, especially a young black woman. As a culture, we tend to keep our children in the dark about sexuality, save the “You Better Not Get Pregnant/ Have Sex” line, and all it’s done is hurt us. Somehow we developed the mentality that talking openly about sex, birth control, and sexuality in general was going make all our children (and ourselves) these raging lusty creatures, but it hasn’t. All that’s happened is that our impressionable youth learn about sexuality through the media (which is completely irresponsible) and ill-fated experiences. No one is pro-abortion, but abortion is a consequence of the lack of education our young people, particularly black women, suffer because of the ignorance, stubbornness, and religious hypocrisy they inherit from the older generations.

    If we want our children to stop having abortions, how about we stop threatening them with physical violence for exploring a natural human experience?

    How about we keep them at home and love them instead of throwing them out onto the streets?

    How about we teach them to think independently, instead of always bending to the will of peers, media, misguided authority, etc.?

    How about we teach them that both God and their families will still love them even when they make mistakes?

  • Alexis Dixon

    “People who are abstinent NEVER get the “salute”. All they get are laughs for ‘not gettin some’. This is our culture, it’s twisted isn’t it?”


  • sloane

    i meant-obfuscate

  • An Actual Teenager

    I’m an abstinent teenager and I’m not “sexually repressed”. I chose to be abstinent after going to church. And they didn’t just say “Oh don’t have sex because God said so.” No. They told us about condoms and how they sometimes can rip. They told us about birth control and how it can not work sometimes. They even showed us STD infested genitals and made sure we knew what healthy penis and vagina look like. After all that, I choose to not have sex because I don’t want do deal with making sure I have a condom at all times and I don’t want to deal with taking birth control. Abstinence has worked for me. Because I don’t have sex, I’m not another black teenage statistic.

  • oknow

    congrats from abstaining but not every teen or adult out there is like you.. things happen and guess what ppl have a right to decide what is best for them whatever it may be.. not condoning what she did or what she chose to do but when she has the baby – ppl like you will be the 1st ones saying that if she couldn’t feed the child why have it!

  • oknow

    what planet are you living on.. you talk your kids til you are blue in the face and you know what they will continue to do what they want to do.. they have to be the ones to decide to use what you teach them and if they don’t whose fault is it?! parents aren’t the blame for all their children mistakes.

  • JC

    I agree! When I was a teenager( I am now 28) I had very open, honest, informative discussions with my family as well as a great sex ed program at my school. After being fully informed about sex and sexuality I came to the decision that I WASN”T ready for sex and waited well into my twenties until I had sex. I don’t think I deserve a medal or anything like that but there is something to be said about having those disucssions with teenagers and arming them with the best thing in the world and that’s education!
    I know women who have had abortions and I know that the decision to have one is one that still haunts them. It is not something that I have known anyone to take lightly and the judgement from certain people needs to stop!

  • Tiffany W.

    No. I’m not going to applaud someone for doing what their suppose to do. I’m not going to applaud you for going to school, getting good grades, cleaning your room, and not having sex under your parents household. That’s your job as a young person.

    I can tell that you’re very young, and have not experienced much in the world. You should read Jessica R McJunkins post twice and one more time. Would you feel the same way if a young woman became pregnant from rape? Certainly these three women agreed to the sex, but what you’re spewing is too rigid for it to be realistic. If being abstinent is the best thing for you, that’s good for you…..and that’s it. Abortion is at times the best option for a woman.

    Sidenote: It’s funny that the same people that yell abortion is wrong, also look down on poor people that need assistance to support these precious children they fought to bring into the world.

  • binks

    Tiffany W get out of my head because I’ am co-signing that comment! Personally, I think people need to stop the judgement. Abortions is the situation where you have to apply it for yourself alone, you can’t paint your beliefs, ideologies and views on someone else. I think abortions should be talked about, regardless if you for it or against it because both sides need to be heard and usually the pro-choice side is overshadowed, because pretending that abortion isn’t an option that a lot of women don’t think about one time or another is wrong, that it doesn’t happen which is again wrong, or shaming someone if they had it or talk about it which happens often is not curving the rate of abortions in general. Hate to break it to ya but their is NO EASY WHEN IT COMES TO SEX people need to hop off that train. But I’ am not going to fault you because your views are your views however I know a lot of people who held similar beliefs and opinions such as yours and the first thing I ask them is “well, have you known someone who had an abortion? Did you talk to them personally about their experience and aftermath?” And 9 times out of 10 the answer is no so how can you judge and know what an abortion is like if you never had one or isn’t close to someone who had one. It isn’t a quick and thoughtless procedure that people paint it out to be a lot of women who had abortions experience long term stress and trauma from it so it isn’t the easy route nor is it black and white but I digress…just food for thought

  • Rhuebekah

    everyone is doing it so it must be right….

  • charbaby

    My thing is teens are always going to explore sex at that age. Bodies and hormones are changing and the body is ripe for experimentation. As Parents, adults, older family members, older friends, mentors, what have you I feel it’s important to encourage teens to wait but also be realsitic and explain how contraceptives work. We can’t be stupid enough to think every child will wait. Come on.

    Further, no one can judge a person until they have been in that situation. I will not judge her for aborting her child because that is not my job. I’m not the judge of mankind. God is. I applaud her for choosing to use birth control, and I sympathize with her because I know what it’s like to have birth control fail. Do I agree with her choosing abortion? I don’t know. But I know she obviously faced the situation with maturity and that’s more than I can say for some girls you see on fb or twitter joking about getting abortions, having abortion parties, etc.

    The most I can hope is she learned a lesson. Even if you get the shot, use the pill, use a condom too. I have a friend who despite regularly taking her pill always gets pregnant. I finally told her I will buy you a pack of condoms cause it just ain’t right. Do yourself a favour and back up your back up.

  • RobbyDoesDallas

    Let me guess- You want to be on TV huh? “No one ever pays attention to me” is what it sounds like… Have a seat, and please refer to Tiffany W’s comment.

  • obelle

    I decided to refrain from sex as a teenager because 1. I believe it was meant for marriage only 2. I didn’t want to live with the guilt 3. I did not want the risk of unwanted pregnancy or an STD. At the age of 25, 3 months before my wedding my now husband and I found out we were pregnant. We had decided to try sex before the wedding and yep-see what happened. We decided that we were not ready for children and I had an abortion. I do not regret my decision nor am I torn up about it. I am still happily married and child free until we are both done with school and ready for children. I admire the girls on the show who are open about their decision. There is nothing to be ashamed of. If men can father children and walk out on them and they are not condemed, why should a women be ashamed of her decision to not have a pregnancy? Abortion is not birth control, but things happen and I would rather terminate the pregancy than be stuck with a child that I didn’t want or can’t afford. That may sound selfish, but that is the problem with a lot of women. We try so hard to be everything, to do everything for everybody that we forget to be selfish and take care of ourselves first.

  • Laila Apples

    I salute their honesty but this should not have been televised.

    I never understood why people don’t discuss the fact that people can discriminate against you,pass you up for all kinds of good things that would be valuable to you and your life and you’ll never even know they did.

    Somethings are best kept to ourselves.In my humble opinion only doctors sociologists economists pastors and psychiatrists should be on tv educating people and discussing abortions.

  • Ashley Sykes

    @tiffany w “I can tell that you’re very young, and have not experienced much in the world” Ma’am please have a seat on that one. i HATE when people on the internet say that. you’re assuming that shes young based on what? there are 60 year old women who feel the same way she does so whats your point?what does her age have to do with her having some sense. what she is saying is very true.

    ladies let me just say…. its very hypocritical for you to reply to someone’s comment and say “you need to stop judging other people’s decisions” because YOU are judging your damn self. if you notice most of the people in this comment section that are preaching to not judge other people are doing the most judging.

    and really? @secretaddy you assume that if someone is abstinent then they are sexually repressed? WOW see, that exactly why i agree with S. people wonder why unwanted pregnancies and abortions are so high yet the same people think something is wrong with someone thats not out in the streets sexing like a rabbit.

  • Ashley Sykes

    btw what if an athiest wanted to stay abstinent? why do people always assume that when someone doesnt want to have sex then its automatically because they are christian? why cant it just be that a person knows the consequences of sex and doesnt feel like going through it?

  • S.

    Here we go with the “judgemental” card. I have live long enough to know the simple little fact that EVERYONE is “judgemental” about something and you’re pretty ignorant yourself if you don’t see that

    I choose to be “judgemental” about LIFE because it’s important to me. Black babies are important to me. The Black community is important to me. Smart decisions are important to me. When are we (Black people) going to stop making excuses for ourselves? When that ‘controversial billboard’ post came up we got angry over the deceptive words being used in the billboard but not the actual case it was pleading but why?

    Our community is running in circles because we keep feeding ourselves the same tired and lame excuses (they are young they don’t know any better… in the real world kids can’t resist the urge of sex). I find it funny how many of you mistook my words as me saying that I was on a “pedestal” (which I NEVER said in any way) so that must mean YOU feel that you are beneath me because you didn’t remain abstinent or b/c you aborted or something. My only point in mentioning my abstinence was to show that those excuses are just that… excuses. We need to better prep our girls (and boys) for the temptation of sex. This is where we are failing. With abortion we are only ‘treating’ the effects, not the cause.

    NONE of my brothers remained abstinent and I can tell you that they weren’t just having sex with their girls and girlfriends just because they are ‘young’ and living ‘in the real world’. It’s something deeper. It’s always deeper. As with all my friends who had sex too

    My post was NOT about me “bragging” but it was written out of frustration due to how our community treats sex, abstinence, abortion, etc, and then cries over our never ending terrible statistics *sigh*

    I am sorry if anyone was offended but I am not sorry for my opinion

    And oh yea, just because you don’t agree with my opinion does not make me a “troll” Aren’t we adults? Learn to accept opposing opinions without calling names

  • Laila Apples

    who wants to be the FACE of abortion though?
    I think that really is the biggest issue here.

    Does anyone care about their own image anymore?

    I get that birth control pills don’t work for some women neither does the patch.
    I get that some women have negative reactions to some form of birth control.
    I get that it is wrong as hell they don’t have anything outside of condoms for guys.

    But I also have to say this and I really hate to but maybe poor women should start teaching their daughters to only sex/date/marry ^^^^$^^^ if they are going to do any of that.I know that money isn’t the only reason why people have abortion but it seems for a large number of black women and girls it is.

    I’m not a genius but I overstand the simple equation of
    poor girl + sex with a poor guy=poor kids.
    At least this is the rule most of the time.

    it’s okay yall can cue Kanye’s golddigger now.

  • binks

    True we all judge and your views are your views and you are entitled to them but your comment came off as a bit overly generalizing. As for the “controversial billboard” of course it distracted from the issue of abortions as a whole because it was race baiting and downright insulting to black women whether you had an abortion or not or if you are pro life or pro choice. I doubt it would fly if the ad said “the dangerous place for a white American child is in the womb” so why should African Americans women take it and say oh okay? Abortion is already a hot button issue for women regardless so why bring race baiting into it, it isn’t helping but distracting for a proper discussion concerning abortions. I think people are not necessarily making excuses when it comes to sex, protection and unplanned pregnancies but people need to know that this issue isn’t black and white there are numerous sides to it, one size doesn’t fit all in these cases sorry but it just doesn’t, we are lying to ourselves if we think it is. True abstinence programs can work and in theory should, it worked for me, but that doesn’t mean it will for other people or that others will follow that path. There need to be other alternatives and honest discussion all around not just “don‘t have sex and scaring them from the temptation“, though pro-life people don’t like it but abortion is an alternative it might not be yours but who says it isn’t the other woman’s alternative similar to adoption or birth control. And finally the think that makes the abstinence angle a bit inconsistent is there is never other discussions or backup plans for women who already had unplanned pregnancy and need help financially with the aid of other government resources/assistances(that is a whole other discussion that people don’t talk about or fingers are being pointed) or the numerous of kids that are in foster care, another system that is failing and needs to be overhaul, or the ones that falls into the other percentage of abstinence not working for them. My thing is you can’t paint people with board strokes

  • TR

    Nothing to be applauded here. She did what she felt she needed to do. It is what it is. By the way, applauding her decisions is judging her as well. It is a positive judgment. If some will take a positive view of what she did it is only natural that some will take a negative view. Both are legit. If this woman is willing to put her business out there like that then she has to deal with both the cheerleading and condemnation that comes with it.

    And if you are going to applaud her decision to get an abortion make sure you question her decision making as well. The two go hand in hand.

  • S.

    Binks IA

    Everything about that biilboard controversy was a mess. The “race baiting” AND the facts… which was the reason I didn’t comment. It’s said that it was true but it was sad that they threw race in the mix when abortion happens across the board.

    As far as this abortion convo goes… I’m not delusional. I know people will continue to have sex knowing the possible outcomes. What I am saying is “we” (as a community) seem to completely skip over the WHY and we put all of all attention and activism towards ‘treating the results’.

    Whatever we are doing isn’t enough (despite the stats someone else posted)… that’s all i was saying

  • shanny

    just 1 question

    don’t you think its selfish to bring a child into the world knowing there going to have a hard life in order to tend to your own guilt?

  • shanny

    I agree with you 100%

  • Tiffany W.

    ….no….no I actually won’t sit down because you told me to. You can say, “I don’t agree with this statement because _____”, but you could have kept that little comment to yourself. Aside from that, I said that she was young because she used broad generalizations that worked for her and applied it to the whole. When you’re young, you cannot see past your own experience. If it works for you, then it must work for everyone too, right? As you get older, and it doesn’t even take 10-20 years to realize this, you can conceive of others experiences and realize that your way is not always the best policy. Life is a bit more complex than that.

  • S.

    Tiffany W wrote:

    “I said that she was young because she used broad generalizations that worked for her and applied it to the whole”

    Well, you can call yourself “Pot” because your entire statement is condescending and contradicting.

    Are you not generalizing all young people by assuming my statement was that of a young person because it’s not “complex” enough? I don’t know who you are but do you really think that there aren’t young people who have “experienced” much more than you have?

    You can definitely sit down with that comment!

  • S.


    I thank you and Ashley for your intelligent and balanced comments!

  • Tlynnsmith

    Couple of things:

    First off, it doesn’t really matter whether or not I “understand the feelings” of women who decide to abort. I may understand how a woman could reach the decision to kill her unborn child, but that doesn’t make the decision right or wrong, simply because I can or can’t relate to her feelings.

    That’s VERY skewed logic.

    Secondly, we all “judge” others. We judge others according to our own standards, “laws”, and convictions. Thats the bottom line. People who don’t ever judge the behavior of others are foolish, or in denial. Take your pick.

    Abortion is not something to be “applauded”…ever. It’s a decision that’s much more complicated, than deciding whether or not to have a root canal. The aftermath can be very damaging to the soul. Nobody talks much about that.

    Some of us wouldn’t be here, if our mothers felt that what we could bring to the world dulled in comparison to the “inconvenience” of our presence. Human beings are much more valuable than we seem to know. We’re not “trash”.

    Not all teenagers/young people/people in general are having sex. Sexual energy/desire can be (and should be) managed. It’s a monster, if allowed to run rampant. That’s what separates us from animals. Abstinence is not impossible, although it is difficult, and requires a plan…not just lofty thinking. The consequences/complications of sexual activity often aren’t worth it. I knew that as a teenager, and I know it now, as an adult. Analytical thinking is crucial.

    If you put your business out there, you gotta be able to handle the backlash that comes with it. Everybody isn’t going to “high-five” you, because you aborted your child. You’re not going to “feel good” about everything you do, and some decisions are irreversible.

  • Tlynnsmith

    Another thing, people always associate “abstinence” with “sexual repression”. That’s not accurate. It’s foolishness. Some of the most sexually repressed people are also the most sexually active.

  • Concerned

    I’m also an abstinent teenager in college, with a boyfriend whom I love. I’m also pro-life.

    A lot of people bash those who are pro-life and accuse us of living in the past, or “not knowing what it’s like to be in those shoes.”

    I am also studying sciences, so I know enough to know that at the point of most abortions, the foetus is mature enough to feel pain. Its organs are present. It is a BEING. If I gave birth to my child today and stabbed it in the chest within minutes of its birth because I didn’t feel I could handle the responsibility, I would be arrested, tried, and sent to jail.

    So, I ask you all–WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE???

    I know the decision is not easy, but DO NOT assert that the murder of a child is a HARD or VIRTUOUS decision. It is still murder.

    Stop with the double standard, people. It’s getting redundant.

  • sloane

    maybe when first trimester fetus can survive outside the womb, the way a full term live birth baby can, we can reevaluate the necessity of abortion. but until then, ultimately, the pregnant woman will be bearing the physical brunt of carrying the child and may have her educational and financial opportunities compromised if she keeps it, so if she wants to terminate a pregnancy she should be able to. in other words, just because you don’t consider abortion a viable option for yourself, doesn’t mean you have the right to restrict other women’s access to it.

    and i hope that since you are pro-life that you’ll be stepping up to plate to foster and adopt all the unwanted children ALREADY in the foster care system.

  • Tlynnsmith

    This is the internet. The discussion is open to any, and everybody. Women will always have abortions, and it will always be their choice to do so. Simply taking a stand on an issue is not going to change any of it. But to only expect viewpoints that mirror yours is kinda…interesting, to say the least. I guess Clutch readers are like The Borg. Hope I’m wrong.

    It’s easy to throw up the, “Well if you’re so pro-life, why aren’t you adopting unwanted children?” line, but last I checked, both pro-lifers and pro-choicers can adopt. So, the same question can be asked of you: Since you have so much concern for children, trapped in the foster care system, are you stepping up to the plate? If you have the power and desire to do, then…do. But don’t make it simply about whether or not you think abortion is wrong.

    I don’t picket abortion clinics, nor do I try and “restrict” a woman’s “right” to abort her unborn children. I’m a staunch “Pro-lifer”, who believes in the right to choose, even when the choice is wrong. God gives us free will, and as much as I struggle with that sometimes, I accept it.

  • Tiffany W.

    @ An Actual Teenager

    I’m glad that abstinence is working out for you, but did your church teach you the proper use of condoms/birth control? Both become obsolete when they’re used ineffectively. Condoms have a low chance of ripping if the male has the proper size and fit. And a woman can become pregnant if she is not using her birth control improperly, like Markai, her Depo-Provera ran out, which caused her second pregnancy. Like men, women have to try out a few birth control methods to find out which ones work for them. Check out the “The Girlfriend’s Guide to Protecting Yourself, Part Two: Birth Control”. There is some great information in there.

    It is pretty remarkable that the church is teaching sex education. I just hope they are teaching the entire thing, and not just the negative aspects. Just because you remain abstinent, does not mean you should omit yourself from a holistic sex education. It’s always good to be informed, so when you do decide to have sex, you’ll be prepared.

  • Tiffany W.

    Ahhh, you remind me of me when I thought I knew so much about the world. Holla at me in 5 years S. You just wait. I assure you, your entire thought process now will never be the same.

  • S.


    Tiffany, I’m sure you’re VERY “experienced” but you’re not as mature as you think you are

  • Jencendiary

    Attempts to shame or belittle a woman for having sexual experience is a bad-faith tactic in sexual health discussions. Also, nobody thinks you’re clever.

  • Tiffany W.

    Did she just call me a hoe? I love it. Mommy, I want some more!

    Assuming the extent of my sexual experience puts us both in that immature boat, now don’t it? Now ROW, ROW, ROW!

  • S.

    Tiffany, take what you want from my comment but I didn’t call you a “ho” and I never ‘assumed the extent of you sexual experience’… you seem to have selective hearing/reading. So actually you and Jencendiary are the ones making asinine assumptions

    “Ahhh, you remind me of me when I thought I knew so much about the world. Holla at me in 5 years S. You just wait. I assure you, your entire thought process now will never be the same.”

    LOL! Are you serious? EVERYBODY can change within a 5 year period… even you Tiffany

  • C.

    Most people don’t get abortions as a form of birth control and teen pregnancy is down. If abortions are such a big issue, why don’t more people adopt or foster the children that are already in the world and need love and guidance? No, WOMEN would rather put down other WOMEN for making a decision that was probably best for them at the time. Don’t pass judgement, that’s GOD’S job, you just mind your business and continue to NOT help to the situation. =)

  • S.


    You’re not doing anyone a favor by posting false information. In fact, you couldn’t be more wrong. Here are some stats…


    * At least 80% of all abortions are performed on unmarried women (CDC).
    * The abortion ratio for unmarried women is 510 abortions for every 1,000 live births. For married women it is 61 abortions for every 1,000 live births (CDC).
    * Women between the ages of 20-24 obtained 33% of all abortions (CDC).
    * 50% of U.S. women obtaining abortions are younger than 25; women aged 20-24 obtain 33% of all U.S. abortions and teenagers obtain 17% (AGI).
    * Adolescents under 15 years obtained less than 1% of all abortions, but have the highest abortion ratio, 773 abortions for every 1,000 live births (CDC).
    * 47% of women who have abortions had at least one previous abortion (AGI).
    * Black women are more than 4.8 times more likely than non-Hispanic white women to have an abortion, and Hispanic women are 2.7 times as likely (AGI).
    * 43% of women obtaining abortions identify themselves as Protestant, and 27% identify themselves as Catholic (AGI).


    Also, abortions due to rape make up less than 1% of all abortions (some studies say < 3%)

    This stat alone speaks volumes..
    "47% of women who have abortions had at least one previous abortion (AGI)"

    If you want more information on abortion stats all you have to do is Google "abortion statistics" or check the US Census Bureau

    This info comes from

  • world

    Thank you for sharing your story. You’re point is very true about men not acknowledging their children. It seems more shame has been inflicted on women then men. Always on Maury Povich there is mother supporting her son’s claims that he is not the father. Biologically its hard for women to deny their maternity.

    I find it interesting that most pro-life advocates are always the ones trying to cut off aid to single mothers. I wish you and your husband the best.

  • Ashley Sykes

    isnt it interesting how when a woman doesnt want anything to do with having a baby and is trying to get an abortion and the man she got pregnant by is saying ” no dont do that i’ll take care of it its my baby too, dont kill OUR child” then the woman says ” its my body/baby so i do what i want to”

    but if that woman would have kept the child and the MAN doesnt want anything to do with the baby then all of a sudden its his child too and he has to pay child support.

  • An Actual Teenager

    @ Tiffany W.

    It is surprising that a church would do that. But my church is in the hood, so we do deal with the problem of unwed mothers. Even though the teenagers at my church don’t get pregnant, there will be a couple girls who graduate from our high school program and get pregnant within a year of graduating. I do feel that they should talk to us about the proper usage of condoms and birth control, but they don’t want to be seen as condoning premarital sex. So I feel like they don’t tell us how to use it to make sure we stay abstinent.

  • Dee

    I think if you spoke with women five, ten, fifteen and twenty years after having an abortion, you would get a different opinion of abortion. I think with age and growth, most women probably regret having an abortion and are embarassed they bought the line that a fetus is not life. Why is having a child so horrible? If you also spoke with women that contemplated having an abortion and perhaps even scheduled an abortion but did not go through with it, I am sure these women will admit they are glad they had their baby. Don’t get me wrong, I think women should be married when they have children with pregnancies planned but everything is not always cut and dry.

  • Jencendiary

    I think you are presenting a statement as fact and providing no evidence to back it up. Also, I disagree with your statement wholeheartedly. I imagine there are plenty of women who were able to improve their station without a baby holding them back and are sad that it was a necessary choice, but would not change a thing if they had it to do over except for becoming pregnant in the first place.

  • SDurham

    I have always been Pro Choice as I am in my fortys I have noticed my views slightly shifting. I am very proud of my daughter Markai for having the courage to share a very personal/private issue with the world!!! Just in case u missed it 1 out of 3 women (not teens) have an abort.. Markai has a good support group, what bout the women who dont and have to face it alone. The only reason I agreed to do MTV 16 and pregnant/ special episode was totally hers and James decison was to educate young ladies about their irresponsible descions to have sex and how it effects their parents! I cant be responsible for what was edited by the producers…trust me there was a whole lot…..I didnt consider that they need ratings. I am going to tell yall what I told her. Be prepared for ppl to critisize/judge u, as long as u can look urself in the mirror and know u have touched or help someone u will be ok…We are all here to be servants of the heavenly father maybe it was her calling to share so then she can educate from her own lifes experience once she graduates from college…who really knows but the Lord!

  • Magda

    After reading all the comments, I’ve come to the conclusion that everyone or most people in this debate are judging one another. If you’re abstinent, you’re repressed. If you’re pro-choice, you support murder/murderers. Can’t we have a mature discussion without name calling? Both sides are throwing generalizations at each other. It’s all very childish to me. I guess, I’m judging this whole conversation. It seems rather futile to discuss whether or not abortion is right or wrong. It’s like debating on the existence of God. Both sides will remain unconvinced of the other side’s stance. You can say if it’s right or wrong for you, and explain why without attacking someone else’s opinion or belittling them and/or elevating yourself to that of an enlightened being. Anyways, that’s my opinion.

  • KeKe

    abstaining does not make you repressed it just shows how much self control you have… idiot
    i chose to abstain and let me tell you I am more happier focused in life and dont have to deal with issues like my friends who go through break ups,STD, failing school,drama, cheating, low self esteem issues and cry over it. I start to love myself and dont easily give myself to people because i cannot control myself. Actually its not that hard, just keep your legs closed till the right person comes. Again this doesnt apply to everyone so sorry if I offened anyone out there.

  • sloane

    ::I’m a staunch “Pro-lifer”, who believes in the right to choose, even when the choice is wrong. God gives us free will, and as much as I struggle with that sometimes, I accept it.::

    if you don’t believe in restricting other’s women’s access to abortions then you are pro-choice. sorry to disappoint you, but the main tenent of the “pro-life” agenda is to restrict access to and eradicate legal abortions, some even to the point of disallowin abortions for rape,incest, or saving the life of the mother if you have personal moral qualms with abortion and would never get one yourself, that’s fine. do what you want with YOUR body, but you have no right to force what may be right for your body and your life on another woman. when abortion is illegal, people still get them anyway, and they become unregulated and unsafe. that is the realistic alternative to legal abortion: unsafe illegal ones that have even more of a chance of killing women as well as fetuses.

    ::I don’t picket abortion clinics, nor do I try and “restrict” a woman’s “right” to abort her unborn children.::

    if it’s not about you. don’t make it about you, okay? it’s nice that you don’t harass women getting abortions or kill doctors but plenty of people do, and they feel JUSTIFIED in doing it because of the anti-choice movement. the fact that YOU aren’t an extremist doesn’t change the domineering nature of the pro life movement and the lack of autonomy they want to allow women to have over their bodies. the inflammatory way they characterize abortion as murder fosters self -righteous extremist elements.

    It’s easy to throw up the, “Well if you’re so pro-life, why aren’t you adopting unwanted children?” line, but last I checked, both pro-lifers and pro-choicers can adopt. So, the same question can be asked of you: Since you have so much concern for children, trapped in the foster care system, are you stepping up to the plate? If you have the power and desire to do, then…do. But don’t make it simply about whether or not you think abortion is wrong.

    nice try, and it’s extremely easy to say, because it brings the dialogue back to rationality: if anti-choicers get their wish and stop legal abortions and more unwanted children are brought into this world, will their self-righteous asses be first in line to take care of them? because pro-choice people want women to be allowed to freely make choices concerning their bodies and their fetuses. pro-choice folks are NOT the ones trying to force these unwanted children into this world. ultimately, if a person is going to be so dogmatic in their personal beliefs about abortion to the point that they want to force women to have children they didn’t want, then they damn well better be the ones making sure these children are supported, whether that’s through adoption, fostering, or through their taxpayer dollars if that child ends up on welfare.

  • sloane

    *i meant- disallow

  • hugh BNYN


    The open, stated, long established agenda of our Globalist RED China ‘friendly’
    establishment (THINK ultra-rich tax free ‘charitable’ foundations a la Rockefeller,
    Carnegie, Ford, Soros, Buffet, —-GATES) is the eugenist dream of 90% extermination of humanity by 2100. ON RECORD FACT

    100 MILLION Americans are to be ‘eliminated’ by 2050 via sterilization, viruses,
    tainted water, food, vaccines, war —and certainly their ‘fave; means —abortion.

    CHECK OUT “ENDGAME’ documentary on Youtube. ESP. the second half.

    The agenda’s been operating since the 1890′s and has its fingerprints all over
    2 world wars, communism, fasacism and nazism. CHECK IT OUT!

    In their studies conducted back in the 1920′s and 30′s they ‘experimented’
    with ‘special schools’ where kids were encouraged to fornicate from an early
    age. They learned such subjects were almost entirely incapable of bonding
    later in life —-hence the end of family and traditional culture.

    They programmed promiscuity into mainstream acceptance via their totally
    engineered, totally fake and set-up ‘POP culture’ from the 60′s on.

    Oprah was used to ‘predictive program’ the unthinkable (i.e. extermination of
    one’s unborn in the name of ‘lifestyle and selfhood’). FACT


    DO the homework


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