In one of the most important pieces of literature in the 20th century, Their Eyes Were Watching God, Zora Neale Hurston brilliantly captured an unfortunate truth about Black womanhood in the following passage:

So de white man throw down de load and tell de nigger man tuh pick it up. He pick it up because he have to, but he don’t tote it. He hand it to his womenfolks. De nigger woman is de mule uh de world so fur as Ah can see. Ah been prayin’ fur it tuh be different wid you.

My mind wanders to this passage- written in the 1930’s when I think about the constant attack of Black women in the media. The vilification and debasement of Black women has a long, troubled history in America that lingers with its rotten stench into our pseudo post-racial society.

Michelle Obama’s presence in the White House has invoked a plan of sorts, by certain individuals and entities, to defy her image by reinforcing all things negative about Black women.

Every week there is a new study focusing on how and why Black women are at the bottom of the totem pole in the land of the free.

Psychology Today is the most recent culprit participating in the campaign to demean Black women. Evolutionary psychologist Satoshi Kanazawa deemed it appropriate to write an incredibly flawed article, using equally flawed science titled, “Why Are Black Women Rated Less Physically Attractive Than Other Women?” In April it was Cassandra Dorius, a postdoctoral fellow at the University of Michigan Institute for Social Research, whose study found that 59 percent of Black women have children by multiple fathers. Before that it was the abortion ad in SoHo claiming the most dangerous place for a child is in the Black woman’s womb. Prior to the SoHo ad there was the study that found Black women’s median wealth to be $5. And of course, there are the ambiguous studies, articles and broadcast segments that will have you believe Black women, especially successful ones, are so undesirable they cannot find Black men to wed.

Let’s not forget the attacks on Michelle Obama early in her husband’s campaign and inauguration into office. A segment of our very ill and racist society hated the idea of a loving, supportive and intelligent Black woman so much that the erroneous Fox News Network reduced her to a “baby mama.” Her senior thesis at Princeton garnered her the label of a racist. God forbid someone write a thesis on if the Black alumni of Princeton will be “more or less motivated to benefit the Black community.” And her infamous statement, “for the first time in my adult life I’m proud of my country,” where sound bites conveniently clipped “adult life” from the speech, was used as some sort of litmus test to prove how unpatriotic she was.

The image of both President Obama and the First Lady in the White House has been a triumphant victory for Blacks. Not because his policies will essentially pull our community out of its rut, but solely because Barack and Michelle’s image, globally, awakens the world to the multiplicity of Blacks in America. They represent what is far too often ignored.

It is painstakingly obvious that far too many people consider a beautiful, intelligent, elegant, Ivy-league educated couple devoid of scandal as dangerous because it challenges the very depictions of Blacks that support people’s unchallenged biases.

Michelle’s image, in particular, has defied the effects of Regan’s “welfare queen” campaign. Whenever she speaks, her words dispel the idea that we are somehow intellectually inferior. Her very existence is contrary to all of the misguided boxes Black women are placed in–attitudinal, hypersexual, loud, inarticulate and uncouth. And because she represents the countless Black women who are none of those things, dubious forces are operating in overdrive to counter her positive image.

Be very clear about what is happening and what will continue to get worse as idiots, racists and sexists are given platforms. bell hooks eloquently describes it better than I ever could:

So what we see is that the mass media, film, TV, all of these things, are powerful vehicles for maintaining the kinds of systems of domination we live under, imperialism, racism, sexism etc. Often there’s a denial of this and art is presented as politically neutral, as though it is not shaped by a reality of domination.

America cannot comprehend a country where Black women hold advanced degrees; a world where we are more qualified than our White counterparts. It is beyond comprehension for the ilk of the Bill O’Reilleys of the world to imagine a country where not all Blacks were raised in the ‘hood. Our racist nation cannot fathom the legions of Black women who have some of the shared experiences as our First Lady.

As long as Black women are getting ahead of ourselves in thinking we can achieve anything, futile articles on why we’re less attractive will continue to be published. Our reproductive practices will continue to be viewed as a spectacle for everyone to see, and the attacks on our personhood will continue to flourish.

What we must remember is that the media does not define us. They do not understand us, and have no desire to. Know that this is deliberate.

But we must not grow weary. We must continue to uplift one another. Use our voices to tell our multifaceted stories. Our mere existence is a testament against an oppressive system that would rather we continue on as the mules of the world Zora noted decades ago. But like Zora, we must not “weep at the world.” We should be “too busy sharpening our oyster knife.”

  • lola289

    “What we must remember is that the media does not define us. They do not understand us, and have no desire to.”

    Well said. Words to live by…

  • Alexandra

    Great article Bene! Michelle Obama goes against majority of Americas negative stereotypes about Black women. Instead of being happy that their preconceptions were wrong, they get angry instead. I’ve been in this position many times, that’s why I don’t care for stereotypes.

    I agree especially with your last paragraph. It summed up exactly how I think Black women should react to this nonsense. Black women will just have to keep striving for the best; don’t waste your time on people that don’t respect you either. Some people will always look for a reason to hate Black women. So instead of questioning them and seeking for their approval, continue whatever paths you’re headed onto. Also remember Black women some 40 and more years ago had it way harder. They made it, so can you all. Slavery is over, so is segregation. The only thing they have left is their media, and American media is losing its validity every year.

  • Jess

    “Michelle Obama’s presence in the White House has invoked a plan of sorts, by certain individuals and entities, to defy her image by reinforcing all things negative about Black women.”

    I absolutely LOVE YOU for writing this article. This is SO true. While the U.S. has always tried to tear down Black people as a whole, they have kicked into SERIOUS overdrive in the past 3 or 4 years, targeting Black women starting with when Obama was campaigning, even before he was elected.

    They’ve pulled all of the non-stereotypical Black women off of TV, put all the Black men with white or non-white women, pulled up every fake statistic they could think of, called us ugly, and God only knows what else. It’s crazy out here and we need to get prepared.

    Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! for saying what so many of us knew to be true.

    And if Obama gets re-elected, look out y’all, it’s gonna be a doozy!

  • bb

    This article made my night lol! After a long day I can now fall asleep in a positive mood :-)

  • bb

    Thank You

  • Laila Apples

    Very encouraging words and it puts a lot of things in perspective.BUT… as a black woman I really believe we don’t use the power that we have to have more peaceful lives, free from the daily assaults, that we want.

    In order for us to be successful there are a few things we must first come to grips with.

    We need to know that there is a war against us.
    That ,of course, the American media is a tool that is being used against us.
    That the majority of black men in America are either our enemies or irrelevant to anything that would include the advancement of black women.
    That many black women are actively supporting things in the media that are against the best interest of black women and that many black women are also supporting people who clearly hate us.

    We need to counter these attacks.

    We could start by absolutely NOT supporting ANYTHING that demeans or dehumanizes black women.This would include not supporting films, television,music,networks that don’t portray us in a positive manner.This would also include not supporting actresses that play roles that are meant to demean and dehumanize black women as well.

    In recognizing that neither black men nor anybody else are automatic allies,we begin to put ourselves as black women first and foremost.We save our protesting and marching only for causes that affect us.We form alliances with one another and with other people,could be any race religion gender,who are valuable to us and our causes.

  • so yeah you know

    Great piece! Kudos to the writer. And I couldn’t have thought of a better author/book to contextualize this piece, especially since Hurston, herself, did not receive the respect and praise that she deserved during her lifetime. Off to sharpen my oyster knife…

  • ruggie

    @Laila Apples – “the majority of black men in America are either our enemies or irrelevant to anything that would include the advancement of black women.” I can’t go there with you. Next.

  • http://www.twitter.com/demasiadabella Demasiadabella

    This is an amazing article! It is a shame that even though we are “free” I feel as if I am still in shackles. My husband and I are educated, at the same time we cannot get the advanced jobs in finance. My husbands interviewed by white men and they try to pick him apart. Things have gotten worse since Obama became president. White America and all the others cannot handle this. I dont know whats going to happen in life with the hatred against us. Brown women are beautiful, sexy, intelligent, strong and every man wants us, no one is as amazing as a Brown woman (tired of the term “black”). These others try to copy our physique, hairstyles, features (lip injections, too much tanning). So it is very obvious that these articles making us appear as the worst beings on the planet is to bring us down. But you know what whitey and everyone else: YOU CANNOT STOP US! WE HAVE TRIUMPHED AND RISEN AGAINST ALL THE ODDS, SO KEEP TRYING IT ONLY MAKES US STRONGER!

    Sick of this racist country!

  • Dawn

    All black women need to do is stay positive, and try and lift each other up because nobody else will. We know we are beautiful, and they know it too! If you find a black man who is down for you (very rare), and treat you with respect… then lift him up. If not, then do not be afraid to find someone who will. Keeping us oppressed is the only weapon they have, oh yes and knowing that most black men are not going to defend us. Once the black woman is broken, then everything else will be smooth sailing for them. So… be strong because our day is coming, and when it get’s here… (sorry for sounding dramatic), we will own this world, or at least this country.

  • Quell

    Great article. The best thing Black women in this country can do is just try to live a healthy life and keep striving, because these attacks are not going to stop anytime soon. I used to get so enraged when I saw articles and other things in the media attacking and dehumanizing black women, but I know the stereotypes aren’t true, and I can’t drive myself crazy worrying about how other people view me as Black woman.

  • Deborah

    Lets also remember our sisters who were raised and are raising there children in the hood – they are no less then us! But fab article nonetheless.

  • Dawn

    a lot of people do not see us in a negative way, and I wish those people were black men, but unfortunately not. We have a few who respect us, and that few think they can vouch for all black men. I can handle the racist remarks and the negative comments about us, but what pisses me off more is we have no one to watch our backs. Dare we complain… then we are considered bitter. I AM MORE DISAPPOINTED IN THE BLACK MAN FOR NOT HAVING OUR BACKS…. PISS ON YA, AND YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

  • BluTopaz

    Thank you so much for such a beautiful, well written article. This is the best piece I have read that makes a parallel between these media attacks and Mrs. Obama’s character as an epitome of womanhood. The image of OUR First Lady has driven a lot of people over the cliff, and most egregious of all: they refuse to admit their insecurities when they are around us. And that includes any Black males who want to place us in a box as well for their own benefit, or claim that we should focus on their needs instead.

    I am sending your article to other ladies, thank you again Bene.

  • copelli21

    This article is right on.

    Not only are black women more successful than ever, we have representation in the White House by an intelligent and elegant black woman. It’s the best PR black women have ever had and there are those who simply cannot tolerate it…..and so the hating intensifies.

    But it doesn’t matter because we are black women and our history and success today is proof of our strength, perseverance, intellect and ability to thrive under even the worst of conditions. It’s our legacy.

  • Justsaying…

    @Ruggie

    What did see say that you can honestly dispute???? I don’t see any massive evidence that black men are not black women’s enemy.

  • Mimi

    I remember coming across an article saying “How Michelle Obama is Bad for Business”. It was all about how she’s an example of a non-stereotype about black women that have been forced down our throats by the media. Isn’t it funny how the majority of blacks know someone like Michelle, but the majority of whites were surprised that a black woman like her even existed? I say we keep doing what we’re doing (handling our business), and confront the idiodicy that black women have to endure nearly every day, in a intelligent and constructive manner.

  • Nadell

    Ms. Bene Viera, you have brought additional sunshine into this glorious morning!
    THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!
    from one inspired woman to another <3

  • Justsaying…

    I don’t honestly think there is a conspiracy against black women now that Michelle Obama is in office.

    I think what’s happening is people are taking a good look at black women’s more often than not SELF-INFLICTED condition (out of wedlock kids, health, rising incarceration rates, etc) and asking a real simple question: Why don’t they take more responsibility for their plight? That is it in a nutshell.

    You have a choice of eating healthy.
    You have a choice of protecting yourself from pregnancy.
    You have a choice of what type of men you deal with.
    You have a choice to pursue education, improve your economic status, and build security.
    You have a choice between potentially being someone’s wife or their babymama.
    This list could go on, but unfortunately too many black women are making BAD choices.

    I think people outside of the black community are starting to see this and black women are now feeling attacked. Personally I have no problem with the media coverage as long as it’s accurate (the so-called study was subjective which makes it crap). Maybe if the media keeps descending some of these chicks will get their lives together and think twice about essentially becoming social misfits and welfare cases. You invite America into your lives when you ask them to pick up the tab with their tax dollars for your mistakes.

  • Justsaying…

    Also, the conspiracy theory doesn’t hold weight because Michelle Obama isn’t the first black woman to be in the public eye where politics and race are concerned. There have been others who were equally or more successful before her. She might be the first lady, but she isn’t the first black woman to be in the spotlight here.

    I don’t see a connection between her and this new media heatwave on black women. I see it as a sign of the times with the media finally picking up on the fall of the black nuclear family (thanks to the black women single debates) etc. The irony here is that it’s black women who ran to the media with these stories. They opened the door and now it’s free for all who are interested in exploring more.

    It’s similar to media picking up the crack cocaine epidemic five years after crack hit the scene. Once it happened it set off a series of media coverage.

  • Ayisha

    You are so in my head!!! I’ve been discussing this with anyone who will listen for the last month. I knew something was up when everyone was insisting that a professional black woman would have a hard time marrying. Really?? I can understand a story here and there and it seemed like EVERYONE was on that issue. “Why does everyone want to discuss our love lives – or perceived lack thereof – now?” is what I was thinking at the time.

    And then came of the other attacks you mentioned. I couldn’t understand what the hell was going on and then it just hit me – Its Michelle Obama – or rather what she represents. It is the explicit intent of those racist/sexist entities of our society to undermine and diminish her value – and as a result our value.

    While I do agree with some of the other comments regarding personal responsibility, that does not negate the point and the truth of the story.

    We cannot let ANYONE else define us to ourselves or to the world. We have the power, but they want to kill us. Literally, Figuratively, Spiritually, Emotionally and Mentally. Believe it. Our survival and success depend on our insistence on defining and fighting for ourselves.

  • Dave

    Usually dont agree with you but their is a great deal of truth in what you put here.

  • BluTopaz

    Bullshit.

    What is this ‘Black women are running to the media with their stories’ when the stories usually prefer to lump ALL Black women together regardless of education, income, etc? And when we are doing something positive like being successful in great careers then the story becomes: ‘but why can’t they find men, what’s wrong with them???’ (as opposed to, what’s going on with the men in these groups and how can they measure up), and as if this a problem that is exclusive to only professional Black women. Do you know how many 6 figure White women i have met/overheard or read about crying in their beers because they can’t find husbands? When was the last time you saw the headline “Unmarried Professional White Women: What is the Problem?”

    So if we are single with kids, that’s an issue. If we go to school and do well and don’t marry nor have children, that’s an issue to be dissected over as well by everybody. Damned if we do and so forth and if we don’t fit into either of these camps, we’re told we make about $5 dollars a year or we’re the ugliest women on the planet. And you want to blame Black women for this? How about calmly asserting yourself in an office setting against a red in the face, screaming cursing White girl and being told by HR “everyone knows Suzie just has a strong personality, but why are so dismissive towards her when she only wants to make her point?” Do you see how egregious this is—if they can’t label you as “angry” then you are something else–meanwhile they can be however the f– they want to be.

    Sure personal accountability is important, but if you think it’s a coincidence that all this recent heightened attention over the plight of the American Black woman is not some contrived reaction perhaps you are not media savvy. And as far as Michelle having predecessors, sorry but the image of the FLOTUS carries a lot of weight in this culture and beyond, and besides Oprah, there really has not been anyone near Michelle’s position. And much of this started with Fox referring to her as Obama’s ‘babymama’ and those other fools painting her with an afro. She is a unicorn to a LOT of White people, and it’s more than a coincidence that all this attention has occurred over the past 3 years.

    You also said: “a sign of the times with the media finally picking up on the fall of the black nuclear family (thanks to the black women single debates)’

    Finally? Guess the name Pat Moynihan doesn’t ring a bell for you. This is an old trope that’s been going on for about 4 decades now, it’s nothing brand new. And I am the first one to say someone should not expect others to pay for their mistakes, and I also don’t like being told that I’m part of the problem, especially when all the factors are not being discussed as well. Like you, I don’t get hooking up with loser males and expecting a different outcome. Does that mean every single Black mother should be put under that umbrella and penalized?

    The “media” is not going to differentiate between the screaming hoodrat on Jerry Springer nor the young mom who for whatever reason, is doing her best to raise her child alone. And granted, the ‘how come Black men don’t love us no mo’ rally cry annoys the hell out of me–it paints us all as desperate and feeds many Black male egos.

    We also have many Black women who are happy, successful, married or happily single who are out here and many are writers and bout sick of this–find it odd that you don’t see THEIR stories plastered all over the media? I do.

  • Roberta

    Thank you for writing such an excellent article. I co-sign with much of what the ladies have already said, except for the part about black men not having our backs. As someone who is married to a loving Black man, I KNOW they exist. This, too, is a part of the lie that the media tries to perpetuate. Don’t believe it.

  • Jess

    Just wanted to say Thank You for writing this article. I honestly had begun to think that only I saw it. There has been a concerted, malevolent effort (read: campaign) of late to belittle, demean and even “de-humanize” Black Women. As a lovely, elegant, educated and confident Black Woman, I am here to tell the media, pundits and pseudo-psychologists that I am here to stay. More importantly–I know my worth. I am loved, coveted and appreciated by Black Men who have not been brainwashed. White Men who are more than intrigued. Latin Men enthralled by my form. And even Asian and Middle Eastern Men fascinated by my essence. I will not be relegated to a role as a fourth class citizen in a country built in large part on the backs of my ancestors. I will not allow your not so secret “hidden” agenda to damage my self esteem or tank my self worth. I know the truth. You are threatened by my inherent sensuality, passionate sexuality and endearing strength. Not to mention the rich beauty of my skin, ample round bottom, pouty lips and our ability to halt aging in it’s tracks. We will not allow you to summarily dismiss us as ineffectual or irrelevant. So stand with me my Sisters, stand beside us Black Men, any Men– all Men who love us. I know my worth.

  • kim

    So, because this is how you and your mother live, I and all the other black women in the US are guilty of the same? Come on now. There are way too many black women who do not fit the stereotype.

  • kim

    @Blu,
    Thank You.

  • d_nicegirl

    Best article I’ve read on Clutch.

  • WoW

    “I don’t care for stereotypes…”

    That is so classy. I hope you spread this msg to everyone. I strongly feel the days of converting haters into lovers is so over.

    You have to ask yourself why soo much energy is spent putting black women down. Not Indians, Japanese/Chinese (although they have their own stereotypes to deal with).

    I know why. Look @ Oprah. Not skinny. Not light skin. and now long flowing locks but she transformed media. And I mean transformed it.

  • Justsaying…

    @BluTopaz

    You need to get mad at THOSE BLACK WOMEN who more often than not CHOOSE to speak on behalf of all black women. I have seen it over and over again. I have seen black single mothers jump up and tell their story and then try to portray it as the story of ALL black women. There have been MANY times where I have thought to myself, “Sit your ass down. As a childless black woman with her life together you don’t speak for me.” So, yeah…black women run to the media and it’s been happening for DECADES now. I grew up watching it happen and chances are if you were coming to age in the mid 1990s you saw it too.

    You said, “And when we are doing something positive like being successful in great careers then the story becomes: ‘but why can’t they find men, what’s wrong with them???’ (as opposed to, what’s going on with the men in these groups and how can they measure up), and as if this a problem that is exclusive to only professional Black women.”

    Again it’s black women who keep running to the media with these “I can’t find a successful black men on my level stories.” If they aren’t on Dateline they are usually writing about it in books and on blogs like this one.

    Also, no one is telling black women to stick to black men. They don’t typically come up in the conversation because everyone knows black women’s single woes can’t realistically be blamed on them.

    You said, “Do you know how many 6 figure White women i have met/overheard or read about crying in their beers because they can’t find husbands? When was the last time you saw the headline “Unmarried Professional White Women: What is the Problem?”

    When was the last time you saw successful white women in mass willing to get on national television and talk about their inability to find a man??? There is the difference.

    You said, “So if we are single with kids, that’s an issue. If we go to school and do well and don’t marry nor have children, that’s an issue to be dissected over as well by everybody. Damned if we do and so forth and if we don’t fit into either of these camps, we’re told we make about $5 dollars a year or we’re the ugliest women on the planet.”

    The educated black women are mainly dissected because they set themselves up to be dissected. This is the group most vocal about their personal lives. Less educated poor black women don’t typically have a problem getting men. This gender war is between the educated successful class…not the poor.

    Also, you’re being dishonest. The $5 dollar study was about net worth….not salary. Considering that many black women have children without marriage it’s possibly true. I’m also sure this doesn’t hold true for successful black women.

    And beauty is subjective.

    You said, “And you want to blame Black women for this?”

    I didn’t say black women were to blame. I said it’s a sign of the times and people are looking at black women’s choices. Again I don’t have a problem with this as long as it’s accurate.

    You said, “Sure personal accountability is important, but if you think it’s a coincidence that all this recent heightened attention over the plight of the American Black woman is not some contrived reaction perhaps you are not media savvy.”

    You must be living in a cave or something. The media attention was THERE before Obama took office boo. The 70% out of wedlock rate was there. The 70% single rate was there. The HIV stats were there. Bill Cosby was going around the country talking about these things BEFORE Obama took office. So please stop selectively remember things. People were talking about these issues BEFORE the Obamas and they will be talking abut them after Obama unless black folks get up and do something about it.

    You said, “And as far as Michelle having predecessors, sorry but the image of the FLOTUS carries a lot of weight in this culture and beyond, and besides Oprah, there really has not been anyone near Michelle’s position. And much of this started with Fox referring to her as Obama’s ‘babymama’ and those other fools painting her with an afro. She is a unicorn to a LOT of White people, and it’s more than a coincidence that all this attention has occurred over the past 3 years.”

    I beg to differ. Condoleezza Rice was considered the most powerful woman in the world at one point and guess what? People were talking about these issues when she was on top too. She was demonized by black media and white media so again the conspiracy theory about all this coming about as a result of Michelle Obama doesn’t hold weight.

    You said, “Finally? Guess the name Pat Moynihan doesn’t ring a bell for you.”

    In fact it does. The report was disputed then by damn near everyone because it wasn’t accurate. Can we say the same today? NO! Which is why the media is finally catching on and saying, “Hey…that guy was wrong when that report came out in the 1960s but he sure as hell isn’t wrong NOW. Let’s look closer at this problem.”

    You said, ” Does that mean every single Black mother should be put under that umbrella and penalized?”

    I’m not personally hurt by most of the media attention because I know they are NOT talking about me. Other black women need to take this same attitude.

    Also, the media isn’t 9 times out of 10 talking about every single black mother. They are talking about the majority who have their kids out of wedlock.

    You said, “We also have many Black women who are happy, successful, married or happily single who are out here and many are writers and bout sick of this–find it odd that you don’t see THEIR stories plastered all over the media? I do.”

    It’s simple: These women don’t seem to be the majority. We know the majority of black women aren’t married. We know the majority of black women who are mothers had them out of wedlock. We know the majority of these women will probably struggle financially. Those of us who are single, successful and free of poor choices are a MINORITY which is why were aren’t seen and heard like the rest.

  • lynette

    Excellent article! Thank You!

  • http://mynameismisswhite.blogspot.com Miss White

    Wow! Let me start there. This article is proof of the caliber of Black women. Beautiful writing.

    Now I’m not a conspiracy theorist but saying there are constant images and portrayals of Black women as sub par is not stretching. It is what it is. It’s sad but what we see is what we believe. I remember moving to GA and befriending a white girl who’d grown up in small town GA her whole life. She took me to a Halloween part and I was one of two blacks there. No biggie I was used to that after frequenting The Fresh Air Fund. But being from Brooklyn, I did feel crazy when I peeped the confederate flag blowing on one of the pick up trucks. I just assumed I was in a house full of racists because of what that flag symbolized. I spoke on it and they began to explain to me their reason for flying the flag. I didn’t agree, but I didn’t think they were racist either. Yet my teachings would have me believe anyone associated with such a thing wants to hang the first black person they see. Anyway, my point is that’s what I’ve been fed. And feeding the public images of down trodden, good for nothing, or good for too much Black women is getting across the intended message. That we ain’t sh*t and the ones like Michelle Obama must be crazy! Something has to be wrong with them. Oh yeah, that’s right…they HATE America. If this isn’t intentional, I don’t know what is. But like the author said, all we have to do is keep being fab. That’s all we can do really. As far as working to change our image, quite frankly I don’t know if I care. The proof is in the pudding!

  • BluTopaz

    An entire INDUSTRY has been built on White women who are dissatisified with their single lives–why do you think Sex and the City and their knock offs are so popular? And again-do you see that framed as a racial issue? No, because White women are the default. It’s only a race issue when you see the handful of Black women on tv who are talking about their personal lack of choices, and it becomes ‘what is wrong with ALL of them?’ I’ll help you out with your research, if you think this is not an issue for White women as well:

    http://www.nytimes.com/2007/01/16/us/16census.html

    And you forgot one thing about Condoleeza: yes, she was considered the most powerful Black woman in the world. Very powerful and uber educated, and as long as she stays unattached to a powerful man she does not represent the same threat to the image of White womanhood that Michelle does; a devoted wife and mother married to the most powerful man on earth and in a patriarchal society that still trumps a woman with brass balls. And Michelle also happened to be a very successful businesswoman so they can’t even call her a golddigger. And don’t forget: Condoleeza polarizes a lot of people because of her politics, the only people Michelle are pissing off are crazy White nutjobs and for what reason? One guess. Even those who are not on the fringe can’t figure it out: I watched an interview with then Senator Obama and Diane Sawyer, and she kept asking him to elaborate on a very brief passage in one of his books about a romantic relationship he had with a White woman eons ago in college. He answered her question and moved on, but she was reaaaalllly interested to know if he could have actually chosen her to be his life partner. The fact that a very powerful Black man is not married to a White woman has driven a lot of these people insane, because it does not fit into any neat boxes they like to put us in. Condi? Well it’s ok that she is super smart and GWB’s water carrier-no biggie. Did you see any of the racist venom directed towards her by the GOP that we see thrown at Michelle? Wonder why, and no it’s not because she’s a Democrat.

    you also said: ““Hey…that guy was wrong when that report came out in the 1960s but he sure as hell isn’t wrong NOW. Let’s look closer at this problem”

    Do you actually see anyone looking closer at the problem, or merely pointing fingers again? Have you seen any in depth discussions regarding racism in the workplace and how that affects single/married/wed/unwed whateva Black women, or more of the same using the image of Black women as visual shorthand for welfare queens? Let’s discuss how most welfare recipients are White. And more stati–let’s discuss how unwed pregnant White teenagers are more likely to have abortions as opposed to Black girls giving birth. I am not saying one is better than the other, but let’s talk about all the factors in society. Sure there are some families where generational dependence on social services are the norm. I don’t see the same level of discussion on racism in the workplace, esp now with even Black grad school professionals not finding jobs at the same level as their White counterparts. It’s not as simplistic as ‘well they’re single mothers causing the downfall of western society blah’ and you sound just as bad as a lot of the right wing pundits.

    “Those of us who are single, successful and free of poor choices are a MINORITY which is why were aren’t seen and heard like the rest.”

    Sounds like you are more concerned with seperating yourself from what you think are the masses. Anyone spending a day just reading Black women’s blogs (like this one) would take away geez, they are educated, opinionated, some single, some married, funny, angry, nice, bitchy, whatever–you know, diverse. But you keep on thinking all of us are defined by which statistic we fit into, if it keeps you happy.

  • alyssa j.

    I’m so glad I am not the only one who noticed that. Ever since the first black family with an attractive black women took the white house it has been like this. She embodies everything that challenged the so called white standard of beauty. And that is the last thing the white American women want.

  • Sarah C.

    Love, love, love this article! I’m all about Black women and our gorgeous Black FLOTUS!

  • Kema

    Before someone can be a black woman she has to be a black girl. A black girl that may have a black father. Should she consider him her enemy? What about her black brothers? Her future (if she so chooses) black husband? And of course… What about her black son?

    Whenever I hear black women or black men talk ill about their counterparts my head hangs low. Think about it… If we work on bettering black boys that would lead to better men and better fathers which would ultimately lead to better daughters. Same for bettering black girls. You cant have one without the other.

    “United we stand, Divided we fall”

  • BluTopaz

    Why do you think Sex and the City and all their knock offs are so popular, if White women are not discussing this as well? But in case you need help with research:

    http://www.nytimes.com/2007/01/16/us/16census.html

    Now go through that and see if there are any descriptors identifying the plight of White women as being so bad, it must be singled out ad nauseum.

    As for Condi, yes at one point she was the most powerful woman in the world but you forgot something: she wasn’t married to the most powerful man and didn’t represent the epitoome of womanhood for a lot of people: the ideal wife and mother to a powerful man. As long as we’re in a patriarchal society that still trumps a woman being considered powerful, unfortunately. So she is super smart and was GWB’s water carrier-no biggie. Do you see the the media throwing the same level of racist venom at her as they do Michelle and no, it’s not because she is Dem. Hell, Bush had people throwing shoes at him and still Laura was not the focus of hatred the way Michelle is, she must be doing something right I say.

    “Also, the media isn’t 9 times out of 10 talking about every single black mother. They are talking about the majority who have their kids out of wedlock.” Where are you getting this statistic?

    “The educated black women are mainly dissected because they set themselves up to be dissected. This is the group most vocal about their personal lives.” Set themselves up or talk amongst themselves–sounds like you are generalizing about the handful of panels you have seen on Nightline and justifying the broad brush treatment.

    “guy was wrong when that report came out in the 1960s but he sure as hell isn’t wrong NOW. Let’s look closer at this problem.” Is anyone actually looking at the problem or still pointing fingers?

    “Those of us who are single, successful and free of poor choices are a MINORITY which is why were aren’t seen and heard like the rest.”

    Anyone just reading Black women’s blogs could come away with geez they’re educated, opinionated, crazy, funny, sweet tempered, bitchy, whateva–you know, diverse. You continue living your life feeling defined by statistics you may or may not fit into, if it makes you feel superior.

  • BluTopaz

    –apologies for any dbl posts!!!—

  • alyssa j.

    Love this

  • Jess

    You all, just ignore JustSaying.

    He/she is full of straight up bullshit.

    Arnold Schwazenegger just cheated on his wife with a Latina, and the head of the IMF has been running up and attacking African ladies, but where are all the headlines about “What’s wrong with white women??? Why are their men leaving them for non-white women??”

    White people have the highest rates of genetic diseases, white men were the first to have HIV/Aids, white wome have the highest rates of throat cancer and throat ghonorrea, white people have all kinds of trashy people on Jerry Springer”, but where are all the statistics about them? Or about Asian women? Or anybody else?

    Why are all the Black male comedians asked to put on fat suits, bad makeup and wigs and told to make fun of Black women? I see WAYY more white women who are obese and tons of other non-blacks who are fat, but we’re the only ones who get made fun of. Where are the back-to-back derogatory word and movies for other women? Why are there studies out now saying that ALL other women are beautiful, except Black women?

    Nowhere, they are almost exclusively reserved for Black women. It’s absolute racist attacks on Black women, non-stop. So Shut the F*ck up, Just Saying. You’re way off base and probably just some stringy haired white chick talking trash.

    THERE IS A DEFINITE CAMPAIGN AGAINST BLACK WOMEN.

  • bt

    THANK YOU!!! So glad somebody finally said it because now I know I wasn’t the only one thinking it. Thank you Bene Viera for this most needed potent article. And I do agree this is the best article I’ve ever read on Clutch. I sincerely hope it is retweeted, reposted and emailed vigorously. It’s awesome to finally see someone standing up in our defense. Not that we needed it because regardless we keep keeping on and none of the vinegar thrown our way will keep us down. We just shake it off and keep it movin because truth be told we know within ourselves what the real deal is. And I don’t care what anyone says Mrs. Michelle Obama ROCKS!!!

  • bt

    @BluTopaz

    It’s ok you can dbl post those comments anytime you like. Your response is absolutley welcome.

  • http://melindasperspective.blogspot.com Melinda

    Great article! I’m getting sick of all the attacks on Black women;it’s like we can’t be left alone for two minutes.

  • DeePDX

    PREACH Alexandra!

    I agree 100%

  • Justsaying…

    @Blutopaz

    You said, “An entire INDUSTRY has been built on White women who are dissatisified with their single lives–why do you think Sex and the City and their knock offs are so popular? And again-do you see that framed as a racial issue? No, because White women are the default. It’s only a race issue when you see the handful of Black women on tv who are talking about their personal lack of choices, and it becomes ‘what is wrong with ALL of them?’”

    You know Sex and the City was based on WAITING TO EXHALE right? Forrest Whitaker sued Showtime for stealing his idea. So black women hit that ground BEFORE white women.

    The argument with black women being mass single isn’t framed as a racial issue either. It’s framed as a social issue that affects black women more so than any other race of women. I mean no matter how you try to slice it that much is true.

    I think the issue become one of “white is wrong with all of them” when those women 1). Proceed to talk for the collective and 2). When the media points out (accurately so) that only 29% of black women are actually married. No other race of women is affected so greatly by this issue as black women.

    You said, “I’ll help you out with your research, if you think this is not an issue for White women as well:”

    I never said this wasn’t an issue for white women. You actually brought them into the conversation…not me. I don’t know why black women automatically go to white women when the conversation is about BLACK WOMEN. Collective white women are getting married. The same is not true for black women. You are comparing apples to oranges.

    You said, “And you forgot one thing about Condoleeza: yes, she was considered the most powerful Black woman in the world.”

    I called her the most powerful WOMAN in the world. I didn’t stick her race to it. Notice how you continue to do that.

    You said, “Very powerful and uber educated, and as long as she stays unattached to a powerful man she does not represent the same threat to the image of White womanhood that Michelle does; a devoted wife and mother married to the most powerful man on earth and in a patriarchal society that still trumps a woman with brass balls.”

    This statement is ridiculous. As long as white men are running things (and they are…even with Barack in office) white women will never have to feel threatened. That is the truth.

    Furthermore, I think anyone can look around and see the condition of black people in this condition. There is nothing to be threatened by. Michelle Obama is ONE black woman and anyone being honest with themselves will admit she is one of the exceptions. Most black women don’t have a college education least of all one from two IVY LEAGUE universities. Most college educated black women don’t have a biracial man who equally shares their educational level. Most black women don’t share Michelle Obama physique etc.

    You said, “And Michelle also happened to be a very successful businesswoman so they can’t even call her a golddigger.”

    It’s not whites who usually brand black women golddiggers…plus Barack Obama wasn’t a rich man when they met.

    You said, “And don’t forget: Condoleeza polarizes a lot of people because of her politics, the only people Michelle are pissing off are crazy White nutjobs and for what reason?”

    Only people I see polorized by Condoleeza Rice are the less educated and black folks who subscribe to groupthink. She caught it more from black people than anyone else. These people don’t know a thing about her background. They simply see her as a trader to her race. Why doesn’t anyone ever mention these crazy black nutjobs?? I don’t think it’s solely racial. I think it stems from ignorance from both sides.

    You said, “One guess. Even those who are not on the fringe can’t figure it out: I watched an interview with then Senator Obama and Diane Sawyer, and she kept asking him to elaborate on a very brief passage in one of his books about a romantic relationship he had with a White woman eons ago in college. He answered her question and moved on, but she was reaaaalllly interested to know if he could have actually chosen her to be his life partner.”

    Diane Sawyer had a job to do. She didn’t pick the questions. And those shows are about ratings so they are going to try to cross the line (ex. Chris Brown and Rihanna).

    You said, “The fact that a very powerful Black man is not married to a White woman has driven a lot of these people insane, because it does not fit into any neat boxes they like to put us in. Condi? Well it’s ok that she is super smart and GWB’s water carrier-no biggie. Did you see any of the racist venom directed towards her by the GOP that we see thrown at Michelle? Wonder why, and no it’s not because she’s a Democrat.”

    Barack Obama is a very powerful BIRACIAL man…one that some whites identify with. I am going to prove you wrong with the ridiculous notions you are sprewing. Look up this guy: Harold Ford Jr. He is a black man who was in politics who married a WHITE WOMAN. Guess what happened to his career? It went to hell. Neither blacks nor whites liked his mate choice. His family is successful. He is a successful man. Some would argue he picked the wrong race of woman to marry.

    Whites don’t have a problem with Barack Obama picking a black woman. They would however have a problem with if she were white. He wouldn’t even have a career. That is the truth. The fact that some of you are trying to push this idea in reverse shows your own insecurity. I agree some whites probably have a problem with Michelle Obama but I think those issues are purely racial…not deeper involving her relationship with Barack. They would rather see him with a black woman than a white woman. Bet on that.

    Furthermore, both Condi and Colin faced racism from both sides (democrats and republicans alike).

    you also said: “Do you actually see anyone looking closer at the problem, or merely pointing fingers again? Have you seen any in depth discussions regarding racism in the workplace and how that affects single/married/wed/unwed whateva Black women, or more of the same using the image of Black women as visual shorthand for welfare queens?”

    As a matter of fact I do, but these people don’t get the media attention they deserve. There are black intellectuals studying and writing about the problem. They are simply not as well-known as the Steve Harvey’s black women chose to focus on.

    I think most people are tired of black folks making racism the scapegoat for all their issues and poor choices. I don’t blame them. I sick of it too. Racism isn’t stopping black women from advancing in a lot of case…poor choices are.

    I don’t see black women doing anything at all to combat the stereotype of the welfare queen. I see chicks popping out babies as young as 15. I see women having babies (plural) out of wedlock. Get that under control and then complain about the stereotype.

    You said,”Let’s discuss how most welfare recipients are White.”

    Bringing whites into the conversation about black women AGAIN.

    Yes, let’s discuss how whites (the majority) population are 38% of welfare recipents and black folks (the minority) population are 37% of welfare recipients. I don’t think you really want to have this conversation.

    You said, “And more stati–let’s discuss how unwed pregnant White teenagers are more likely to have abortions as opposed to Black girls giving birth.”

    I don’t know what the numbers are for whites but the black abortion rate is approaching 19 million…nothing to be proud of and nothing to compare to other races.

    You said, ” It’s not as simplistic as ‘well they’re single mothers causing the downfall of western society blah’ and you sound just as bad as a lot of the right wing pundits.”

    Actually it simply comes down to personal accountability…everyone need to accept it. I sound like I got some sense..an oddity on this thread of the delusional.

    You said, “Sounds like you are more concerned with seperating yourself from what you think are the masses. But you keep on thinking all of us are defined by which statistic we fit into, if it keeps you happy.”

    With good reason too. Again I didn’t say nothing about ALL of us. You keep taking my words and the media as encompassing all of us.

  • Kadesta

    Thank you for putting into words the things I have felt. I believe FEAR is the reason so much energy is put into presenting Blacks/African Americans in a negative light. Fear that one day, we as individuals and as a people, will see our future as positive, as being full of opportunities. Thank you again for writing the words that were in my heart.

  • Justsaying…

    @Jess

    You said, “Arnold Schwazenegger just cheated on his wife with a Latina, and the head of the IMF has been running up and attacking African ladies, but where are all the headlines about “What’s wrong with white women??? Why are their men leaving them for non-white women??”

    I don’t see this with black women either so what the heck are you talking about??? Usually in this day and age if a black man leaves a black woman for a non-black woman he was NEVER married to her to begin with. And it’s black women who usually take black men dating non-black women as a personal affront. Then they turn to the media and starting singing the same old woe is me song.

    You said, “White people have the highest rates of genetic diseases, white men were the first to have HIV/Aids, white wome have the highest rates of throat cancer and throat ghonorrea, white people have all kinds of trashy people on Jerry Springer”, but where are all the statistics about them? Or about Asian women? Or anybody else?”

    They are out there obviously you found them but you CHOOSE to focus on the negative media about black folks.

    You asked, “Why are all the Black male comedians asked to put on fat suits, bad makeup and wigs and told to make fun of Black women? I see WAYY more white women who are obese and tons of other non-blacks who are fat, but we’re the only ones who get made fun of. Where are the back-to-back derogatory word and movies for other women? Why are there studies out now saying that ALL other women are beautiful, except Black women?”

    This is what I mean by delusional. Boo no one ask black male comedians to dress like women. THEY DO IT COMPLETELY ON THEIR OWN. They do it to get rich and to get laughs. No one has to con them into anything. Black men will throw your ass under the bus with a quickness and it’s because they want to do it. Or are you foolish enough to believe otherwise.

    You said, ” It’s absolute racist attacks on Black women, non-stop. So Shut the F*ck up, Just Saying. You’re way off base and probably just some stringy haired white chick talking trash.”

    Honey I’m a black woman and unlike the rest of you I know how to brush B.S. off my shoulder. I personally believe a flame NEEDS to be lit under the black women out here not pulling their weight. That is the only way I can see the situation getting better.

    Funny how you talk about racism in ONE BREATH and then make a racist comment in the next. Please check yourself!

  • Justsaying…

    Correction Forrest sued HBO.

  • http://www.mybrownbaby.com Denene@MyBrownBaby

    Beautifully, brilliantly said. Thank you for this, sis.

  • binks

    And with this article let’s say amen because I agree! I think we need to keep doing what we are doing of bettering ourselves, uplifting each other and supporting each other. Forget the naysayers as my dad always say the loudest wagons are usually the empty ones so don’t waste time acknowledging it. Do you sistahs and love the ZNH quotes

  • Laila Apples

    “Before someone can be a black woman she has to be a black girl. A black girl that may have a black father. Should she consider him her enemy? What about her black brothers? Her future (if she so chooses) black husband? And of course… What about her black son?

    Whenever I hear black women or black men talk ill about their counterparts my head hangs low. Think about it… If we work on bettering black boys that would lead to better men and better fathers which would ultimately lead to better daughters. Same for bettering black girls. You cant have one without the other.

    “United we stand, Divided we fall””

    @Kema my answer to your first question is it depends on how her father treats her and her mother and black women as a collective he can be considered her ally or an enemy or not valuable to her and her life.

    My answer to your second question is depending on how her brother treats her,he can be an ally or an enemy or just not valuable to her.

    My answer to your third question is depending on IF she marries a black man and depending on how her husband treats her he too can be considered an ally or an enemy or not valuable to her life.

    Too many times black women have black men in their lives, family members and others, who fall into the enemy pretending to be a friend category or just being of no value to that individual black woman or black women as a whole.This needs to stop.

    Most importantly more black women need to know how to be valuable to themselves and not their own enemies.

    Furthermore,Kema there is no proof that if “we work on black boys”,something their fathers should be doing,that they will grow up to be allies or of any value to black girls and women.Many black boys ,who had a black mother who” worked on them”, grow up to reserve anything good they have to give to non black women and girls.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Laila Apples

    Before I even go into this topic I want a formal apology from you for having lied to another poster stating that you read on another blog that I supported those boys/men who were arrested and accused of the gang rape of the 11 year old girl in Texas. Now you either provide the link to the blog post that you mentioned or you apologize for slandering me.

    I will be reporting you to the blog host for abuse/slander. You can disagree with me all you want on the things I say but dont LIE on me or any other commenter on this blog.

  • BluTopaz

    @JS

    “You know Sex and the City was based on WAITING TO EXHALE right? Forrest Whitaker sued Showtime for stealing his idea. So black women hit that ground BEFORE white women.”

    Why would he do that, when Terry McMillan wrote WTE? And who said SATC was based on WTE? How do you know it wasn’t based on Girlfriends, or even Living Single?

    Even if this was true, it still does not negate that it’s a hugely popular theme with a lot of single White women because it resonates with them. And I’ll ask it again–do you see this being framed as a White women’s problem? And yep, I’ll bring up White people on a Black blog because none of us are in a vacuum, and why Black women are constantly targeted with the broad brush of being one demographic.

    “The argument with black women being mass single isn’t framed as a racial issue either. It’s framed as a social issue that affects black women more so than any other race of women. I mean no matter how you try to slice it that much is true.”

    And you’re trying to say the media is not malicious in its constant framing as Black women as non-marriage material, esp, since there are plenty Black women who are married and happy who we never seem to hear from on CNN-guess they don’t exist.

    “I called her the most powerful WOMAN in the world. I didn’t stick her race to it. Notice how you continue to do that. ”

    So she was the most powerful woman–your argument that there were others before Michelle doesn’t hold water here because Condi represented something totally different.

    “This statement is ridiculous. As long as white men are running things (and they are…even with Barack in office) white women will never have to feel threatened. That is the truth.”

    Tell that to the racists that you have spent the last three years calling Michelle everything but a child of God they have nothing to fear. I don’t think they know their roles are secure, THEIR insecurities are drowning them out.

    “Michelle Obama is ONE black woman and anyone being honest with themselves will admit she is one of the exceptions. Most black women don’t have a college education least of all one from two IVY LEAGUE universities. Most college educated black women don’t have a biracial man who equally shares their educational level. Most black women don’t share Michelle Obama physique etc”.

    Sounds like you think Michelle is one of those unicorns also. My sister raised 3 college kids alone, sound like a stereotype? She is now one of the top technology experts in the country, and her kids are adults and raising traditional families as well. And her sorors are the same, and we are always laughing about the double takes when colleagues meet her the first time. Michelle has commented herself that there are plenty professional Black women like her, and she wants young Black girls and women to see themselves in her. Look at Valerie Jarrett, Desiree Rogers, etc. If you stop watching so much trash tv and look around you might learn something.

    But if you want to talk numbers let’s look at real ones from http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/01/26/marriage-and-women-over-40/
    :
    “Overall marriage rates are lower among African-Americans, but black women don’t incur a “marriage penalty” when they pursue college degrees. Among black women, 70 percent of college graduates are married by 40″ from”

    70 % of Black women college grads get married. Sure stats are often skewed, but when they are slanted in a way that does not make us look like spinsters it’s never blasted from the rooftops, is it.

    “Only people I see polorized by Condoleeza Rice are the less educated and black folks who subscribe to groupthink. She caught it more from black people than anyone else. These people don’t know a thing about her background. They simply see her as a trader to her race. Why doesn’t anyone ever mention these crazy black nutjobs??”

    Yes, and Black people who disagree with Condi being a war criminal (me being one of them) are making the same amount of noise as Palin & Co. bitching about Michelle trying to get kids to eat right, or her wearing sleeveless tops, or not loving her country, or, or… Talk about apples & oranges. I actually find her upbringing interesting esp growing up in the deep South- but still think she’s a criminal because of her actions.

    “Diane Sawyer had a job to do. She didn’t pick the questions. And those shows are about ratings so they are going to try to cross the line (ex. Chris Brown and Rihanna)”
    .
    How do you know she did not pick the questions? Obama also talked about Black women he had relationships with, interesting why she didn’t ask about them, isn’t it

    “Barack Obama is a very powerful BIRACIAL man…one that some whites identify with. I am going to prove you wrong with the ridiculous notions you are sprewing. Look up this guy: Harold Ford Jr. He is a black man who was in politics who married a WHITE WOMAN. Guess what happened to his career? It went to hell. Neither blacks nor whites liked his mate choice. His family is successful. He is a successful man. Some would argue he picked the wrong race of woman to marry.

    I don’t know much about Ford’s career other than the controversial ad, but now you can prove to me that his career tanked because he married a White woman. Was it the same way Clarence Thomas’s career flopped because he married a White woman?

    “I agree some whites probably have a problem with Michelle Obama but I think those issues are purely racial… ”

    A lot of the ugly comments I’ve heard about her don’t even mention Barack-it’s often HER they have a problem with and that’s telling.

    “I don’t see black women doing anything at all to combat the stereotype of the welfare queen. ”

    Now I know you are out of your freaking mind. No self respecting Black woman is going to generalize ALL Black women like this. If you are Black and this is all you see around you then you need to move. Seriously. Or maybe you are a White troll as suggested above. Sorry to disappoint but I don’t fit into any little ugly boxes, and neither of my friends/colleagues ‘popping out babies’ and we’re all 100% Black, and not looking for a pat on the back either.

    “Actually it simply comes down to personal accountability…”

    And you are not the only one who is using it, as much as you’d like to think you’re unique.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    May I ask why you have black men in your mouth on an article about Michelle Obama and black women being reamed in a largely white media in a largely white society on the heels of an article written by a Japanese Psychologist at the London School of Economics on the unattractiveness of black women according to the perceptions of largely non black people?

    I swear you women see an evil black man hiding behind every corner. Get help!

  • Laila Apples

    WTF are you taliking about ?
    Please post where I claimed you supported those texas 11.

    I won’t be apologizing to you for ANYTHING in this life time i can guarantee you that.

  • Lyoness

    “It is painstakingly obvious that far too many people consider a beautiful, intelligent, elegant, Ivy-league educated couple devoid of scandal as dangerous because it challenges the very depictions of Blacks that support people’s unchallenged biases.”

    Powerful! Thank you for this right here. You put into words what I and my friends feel everyday.

  • Laila Apples

    @QONC or maybe she saw black men co sign the Japanese dudes “study”.You even said yourself in so many words men all over the world,of all “races”, look down on dark women and don’t cosider them attractive.Maybe that was her way of saying f*** every last one of y’all?

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Laila Apples

    http://clutchmagonline.com/2011/04/suffering-in-silence-mother-drowns-herself-and-3-kids/comment-page-1/#comments

    “Laila Apples
    APRIL 16, 2011 AT 4:22 AM
    Ignore queen of new castle.I saw it in another thread saying people should take it easy on those eleven black dudes that raped that little girl in Cleveland Texas.”

    “Lavish
    APRIL 18, 2011 AT 1:26 PM
    Thanks Laila for the 411 on that.”

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Laila Apples

    Now I have to go through this elementary step with you again. Men have had a historical preference for lighter women. This isnt to be confused with light skinned women because being light skinned is very relative depending on what your race is and where your people have evolved on this planet.

    Lastly,

    Laila Apples
    APRIL 16, 2011 AT 4:22 AM
    Ignore queen of new castle.I saw it in another thread saying people should take it easy on those eleven black dudes that raped that little girl in Cleveland Texas.

    This was on the article about that woman who murdered her children.

  • bb

    Best comment by far.

  • TR

    @Kema

    That was beautifully stated. Gender wars are counter productive. My black mother helped make me the man I am today. In turn, I am helping to raise my daughter into a strong, intelligent and loving black woman. I needed a woman. My daughter needs me, a man. It’s all full circle. However, some people’s minds don’t allow them to understand that principle.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Kema

    “Think about it… If we work on bettering black boys that would lead to better men and better fathers which would ultimately lead to better daughters. Same for bettering black girls. You cant have one without the other.”

    Misandry is especially frightening if you are the primary care giver.

  • Laila Apples

    Yep I said that because you did tell people in so many words to take it easy on those criminals after they taped what they did.Someone suggested they be hung killed raped or something and you came in and showing plenty of sympathy for them.At which point people basically disagreed with you and you left the thread.

    Furthermore the only thing elementary is your dumb ass thinking that you or other black men can come here and spew your bile and black women won’t say anything.Dawn was just telling you all to go straight to hell.Get over it.As I have said you have stated very similar to what that Japanese dude has said yourself about darker skinned women and now you are angry that Dawn basically says f*** y’all?Again,get over it!

  • Laila Apples

    Also QONC you post at other sites that I read, but don’t post at, from time to time.I saw you there lending support for those criminals when they were being roasted.In fact I have seen you at many sites geared toward black women spewing your bile.
    Again I will not be apologizing to you any time soon.And good luck with that whole reporting me for slander thing.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Laila Apples

    You need to POST any response that I have ever had on that case in texas as I have posted what you said about me. Unless you can produce the post than you owe me an apology and I will be going to the editors of this blog and reporting you for slander and libel.

  • Laila Apples

    @QONC I tell you what.The editors here have access to their own archives and the editors at other sites that you have spewed your slanderous bile have theirs.You were worried for those criminals to get a fair trial after they videotaped themselves in the act of raping that poor little girl.The thought of those guys being a victim of racism and somehow getting an unfair trial after taping themselves in the act was more awful to you than that little girl being raped.

    I will not be apologizing to you at all EVER.I am laughing AT you for trying to play a victim on this site after all the slanderous shit you say about black women everyday.

    So I’m giving you permission to go ahead and push the button.Tell the editors what EVER you choose to tell them.

  • Dawn

    @QueenofNewCastle…. well maybe you should take a page out of your “Elementary” handbook because it sounds like you just read the title and not the article. Also, you’re either a black mother of 3-4 black sons, with 3-4 white daughter n laws. Or maybe you’re just white. My guess, with this line “I swear YOU WOMEN see an evil black man hiding behind every corner. Get help!” If I had to guess…. I choose white woman!!! We are not condemning every black man, but you and they know who they are.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Laila Apples

    So basically you cant produce the posts? You’re a coward and a liar. Now everyone here can read it for themselves and I will be making a formal complaint to this blog against you.

  • Gigi Young

    You don’t see any correlation with the rise of social networking and these sort of studies? Before Twitter, Facebook, blogs, etc, would studies like the one in Psychology Today have shot around the web so easily? Or if links and tweets and blogs/online mags didn’t discuss these issues, would we even pay attention to this stuff? Or, if Steve Harvey and all of these “love gurus” didn’t use social media to reach people, it would be in the mainstream 24/7 media?

  • Dawn

    @Laila Apples… Now that’s what I’m talking about. Thank you for having my back.

  • Pocahontas

    Glad to see this article, black is beautiful if this were not true why is every race that’s non african trying to be black? Tanning, lip plumping, breast augmentation, and now butt lifts the list goes on and on. Yet when it applies to black woman who naturally have these characteristics then it’s flawed in us but beautiful in them, how is this? I’m proud of my heritage, which is both african and native american, often at my place of work I have caucastian woman comparing their tan to my natural beautiful skin tone. But yet the media would have black woman believe that there is something wrong with our natural beauty, I say action speaks louder than words imitation is the most sincere form of flattery and non black woman are striving to capturer the natural beauty that all black sister are born with.

  • Laila Apples

    Your welcome.That asshole shows up on this site and even other sites that are exclusively for black women saying all kinds of strange things.It even got angry when people were mad at the Texas dudes that raped that girl.SMDH.It seemed to be very worried that those males would become the victims of racism.Meanwhile,I didn’t see it show any compassion to the poor child.You have to take what is says with a grain of salt.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Dawn,

    Wow. The two boogeymen for black women: black men and white women. Indeed, you do need help. Presumably if the black man is hiding behind every corner the white woman is behind every bush just waiting to sabotage black women. Jesus be Occam’s razor.

    “well maybe you should take a page out of your “Elementary” handbook because it sounds like you just read the title and not the article. Also, you’re either a black mother of 3-4 black sons, with 3-4 white daughter n laws. Or maybe you’re just white. My guess, with this line “I swear YOU WOMEN see an evil black man hiding behind every corner. Get help!” If I had to guess…. I choose white woman!!! We are not condemning every black man, but you and they know who they are.”

    Unfortunately I am not the mother of 3-4 black sons. That would be an honor if I were. If they had wives regardless of race who loved, honored, and raised up my grandchildren properly, I would be doubly honored.

    I’ve read the article.

    The original title was, “Why Are Black Women Rated Less Physically Attractive Than Other WOmen, But Black men Are Rated Better Looking Than Other Men?”

    He starts off by saying men and women are attractive for different reasons. Add Health not Kanazawa rated the respondents on their physical attractiveness over a seven year period. Then it was Kanazawa erroneously trying to hypthosize why those respondents responded the way they did.

  • browniegirl360

    Yes while this is one of the best writings I’ve read about us, I must say; WE SHOULDN’T CARE!!! We need to make it know that we are in fully aware of who we are and will not allow ANYONE to challenge that. We need to continue to UPLIFT EACH OTHER and cast out those with a different agenda. I have learned from experience that racist people don’t like you telling them that you don’t care about them or their beliefs and that they can die and go straight to hell and take their bullshyt beliefs with them!

  • browniegirl360

    Can I get a AMAN on this sista! Yes with a BLACK AFRICAN AMERICAN WOMAN in the white house, this challenges the white woman and her white womanhood. This also makes them insecure again…this time on a GLOBAL level. One would have to be completely INSANE to believe that they are the only woman on earth that is beautiful and desired…white men have created this monster that many of them are now tired of dealing with. Everyone else just bought into the bullshyt.

  • Lady T

    Yes, yes, yes! Such a powerful and timely article. I’ve been talking about this with others. I noticed attacks to make Black women appear “less than.” I’m not buying it, because it’s not true. And yes–whenever Black women don’t fit neatly into stereotypical boxes, it causes concern. Sad.

    Some people don’t understand that there is a range of Black women. There is no “one” way we act or behave. Our beauty lies in that we are varied. From opinionated and sassy to quiet and elegant (and beyond), Black women come in all forms. And media plays a role in why we don’t see this.

    On the other hand, media can be used to show us in our glory. Clutch does a great job in providing a platform for Black women. We need more of this to counterattack the negative. We need to support each other and platforms that provide positive images.

    Peace.

  • browniegirl360

    because we are ENVIED…there are no other reasons for the ongoing attacks.

  • aj

    beautifully written and a pleasure to read.

  • Quell

    @Dawn
    I Totally agree with you. It’s extremely annoying when as a black woman you can’t even react when you’re disrespected without being labeled an “Angry Black Woman” and I too am upset that we don’t have more support from black men, but unfortunately that’s something I’ve learned to live with.

  • Blksbeauty68

    Reminds me of a conversation I had with a wealthy white woman . At my Childs school. She asked how many kids I had and said one . She said why I said children are expensive and that would be irresponsible don’t you think she ask me more questions and I could see her anger like I was not living up to what they have been saying about black women for years. If you raise your children and speak with intelligence it throws them off . And to make them feel superior . They say oh she is a credit to her race wow . That is so White of you.

  • Justsaying…

    @BluTopas

    You said, “Why would he do that, when Terry McMillan wrote WTE? And who said SATC was based on WTE? How do you know it wasn’t based on Girlfriends, or even Living Single?”

    It’s a fact that HBO did not deny. You can look it up. I think he pitched them an idea for a show about four black women and they stole the concept and made Sex and The City. I read about it not too long ago.

    You said, “Even if this was true, it still does not negate that it’s a hugely popular theme with a lot of single White women because it resonates with them. And I’ll ask it again–do you see this being framed as a White women’s problem? And yep, I’ll bring up White people on a Black blog because none of us are in a vacuum, and why Black women are constantly targeted with the broad brush of being one demographic.”

    And I’ll say it again…it’s not really a white woman’s problem because white women collectively ARE getting married. They may not be staying married but they are getting there and therefore are not lacking for men. That is simply what it comes down to with them. They don’t have the single market on lock.

    You said, “And you’re trying to say the media is not malicious in its constant framing as Black women as non-marriage material, esp, since there are plenty Black women who are married and happy who we never seem to hear from on CNN-guess they don’t exist.”

    How can it be malicious when it’s usually BLACK WOMEN who volunteer to speak on camera during these programs? It would be one thing if black women weren’t being used in news segment about themselves but that is not the case. There are black women like Sherri Shepherd (who has a man) jumping up and volunteering for this stuff. And if you call 29-30% plenty I’m going to have to give you the side-eye.

    You said, “So she was the most powerful woman–your argument that there were others before Michelle doesn’t hold water here because Condi represented something totally different.”

    I agree she actually had POWER and therefore was a BIGGER threat than Michelle Obama. Yet you and the rest of the “don’t make any sense” set keep trying to say, “that Michelle Obama is the most powerful black woman we have every seen and therefore the reason for all the hate.” Whatever power Michelle has it comes from being married to Barack…meaning HE not she has some power. She is purely a symbol in the background like all other first ladies. Condi actually had a job. She had pull. I would argue that she was more powerful in her time than Michelle Obama.

    You said, “Tell that to the racists that you have spent the last three years calling Michelle everything but a child of God they have nothing to fear. I don’t think they know their roles are secure, THEIR insecurities are drowning them out.”

    Exactly you are talking about RACIST-people known for living in fear–while I’m talking about common everyday white folks. They don’t see her as a threat. I imagine most of you must not associate with too many white people. White women see ASIAN women as a threat…not black women.

    You said, “Sounds like you think Michelle is one of those unicorns also. ”

    She IS and the number prove it. Denial won’t change the situation.

    You said, “My sister raised 3 college kids alone, sound like a stereotype? She is now one of the top technology experts in the country, and her kids are adults and raising traditional families as well. And her sorors are the same, and we are always laughing about the double takes when colleagues meet her the first time. Michelle has commented herself that there are plenty professional Black women like her, and she wants young Black girls and women to see themselves in her. Look at Valerie Jarrett, Desiree Rogers, etc. If you stop watching so much trash tv and look around you might learn something.”

    Plenty? NO! Only about 19% of black people even have a bachelor’s degree. No is denying that there are professional black women. The problem here comes when black women actually sit around believing those are the MAJORITY or even HALF of the black female population: They are not. The vast majority of black women do not have a college education. If you stop sticking your head up your put and actually read something you might learn something.

    You said, “70 % of Black women college grads get married. Sure stats are often skewed, but when they are slanted in a way that does not make us look like spinsters it’s never blasted from the rooftops, is it.”

    Again you are talking about a SMALL group of people. College educated black women aren’t the majority. Those are most often the individuals getting on TV talking about their marriage woes…not the hood chicks. So something is amiss even with the link you offered. I can go across the internet right now and find 50 or so articles about marriage evading college educated black women.

    You said, “Yes, and Black people who disagree with Condi being a war criminal (me being one of them) are making the same amount of noise as Palin & Co. bitching about Michelle trying to get kids to eat right, or her wearing sleeveless tops, or not loving her country, or, or… Talk about apples & oranges. I actually find her upbringing interesting esp growing up in the deep South- but still think she’s a criminal because of her actions.”

    If you say so.
    .
    You said, “How do you know she did not pick the questions? Obama also talked about Black women he had relationships with, interesting why she didn’t ask about them, isn’t it.”

    If you did you research you would know this…they have a job to do and they are typically told what question TO ASK. Please refer to Chris Brown’s last interview with Good Morning America.

    You said, “I don’t know much about Ford’s career other than the controversial ad, but now you can prove to me that his career tanked because he married a White woman. Was it the same way Clarence Thomas’s career flopped because he married a White woman?”

    Clarence Thomas didn’t have a career in politics. He had one in LAW. Again and apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. ran for a public office. There is a difference. And yes, the white woman shot his career to hell (though I am sure there were other bumps in the road). Google him.

    You said, “A lot of the ugly comments I’ve heard about her don’t even mention Barack-it’s often HER they have a problem with and that’s telling.”

    I’ve heard this from BLACK PEOPLE too. I’ve heard black people call her ugly. So, it’s not just the white folks doing this.

    You said, “Now I know you are out of your freaking mind. No self respecting Black woman is going to generalize ALL Black women like this. If you are Black and this is all you see around you then you need to move. Seriously. Or maybe you are a White troll as suggested above. Sorry to disappoint but I don’t fit into any little ugly boxes, and neither of my friends/colleagues ‘popping out babies’ and we’re all 100% Black, and not looking for a pat on the back either.”

    I’m just honest. With a 70% out of wedlock rate it’s true black women aren’t doing anything to combat the stereotype. Keep living in denial. It would be different if that number were 10% but no over half of black children are born out of wedlock and a great deal of black women have their children by more than ONE man. It’s not about self-respect. These chicks don’t represent me. It’s about reality. The welfare queen stereotype has largely stuck because black women have done NOTHING as a collective to combat it. You keep pointing to yourself and your friends….you are not the only black women out here. Open your eyes.

    You said, “And you are not the only one who is using it, as much as you’d like to think you’re unique.”

    Try using logic and not resorting to personal attacks because you don’t like my thoughts. I never said I was the only individual using anything.

  • Jeneane

    Unfortunately, this author mixes facts with prejudice to prove a point. While there are many strong, educated, intelligent Black women who are doing the right things for their families, the numbers don’t lie about the other category of Black women who are having children out of wedlock by multiple fathers and/or using abortions as birth control, and aren’t saving a dime. So don’t confuse the two.

    The Psychology Today article caused an uproar and the author was fired, but she wrote about people’s perceptions, not what was necessarily true. The fact is many people perceive Black women to be less attractive because of all of the negative stereotypes that we see and hear in the media. This includes songs and videos by some of our own Black men, that degrade and objectify women. It also includes some of our own women who get paid to be video “hos” and are proud to be their man’s baby’s momma.

    Yes, there are many beautiful Black women like Michelle Obama who deserve our praise and admiration – and they should not be lumped in with others who don’t deserve our respect. But we also have to acknowledge the Black women who portray the very stereotypes that they denounce.

    So let’s, as a community of Black people, hold high those women who deserve to be seen as shining examples and reach out and help those women who can’t yet get to that place. Why don’t we help all of our women get educated? Help them take pride in their appearance? Help them stop having children out of wedlock? Help them find and keep good jobs so they can save money?

    Instead of ignoring the bad in our community, we should embrace the positive and the negative so we can make us stronger as a people. If we did that, one day, the statistics would no longer be true!

  • Justsaying…

    @BluTopaz

    You said, “Why would he do that, when Terry McMillan wrote WTE? And who said SATC was based on WTE? How do you know it wasn’t based on Girlfriends, or even Living Single?”

    It’s a fact that HBO did not deny. You can look it up. I think he pitched them an idea for a show about four black women and they stole the concept and made Sex and The City. I read about it not too long ago. The case was settled.

    You said, “Even if this was true, it still does not negate that it’s a hugely popular theme with a lot of single White women because it resonates with them. And I’ll ask it again–do you see this being framed as a White women’s problem? And yep, I’ll bring up White people on a Black blog because none of us are in a vacuum, and why Black women are constantly targeted with the broad brush of being one demographic.”

    And I’ll say it again…it’s not really a white woman’s problem because white women collectively ARE getting married. They may not be staying married but they are getting there and therefore are not lacking for men. That is simply what it comes down to with them. They don’t have the single market on lock.

    You said, “And you’re trying to say the media is not malicious in its constant framing as Black women as non-marriage material, esp, since there are plenty Black women who are married and happy who we never seem to hear from on CNN-guess they don’t exist.”

    How can it be malicious when it’s usually BLACK WOMEN who volunteer to speak on camera during these programs? It would be one thing if black women weren’t being used in news segment about themselves but that is not the case. There are black women like Sherri Shepherd (who has a man) jumping up and volunteering for this stuff. And if you call 29-30% plenty I’m going to have to give you the side-eye.

    You said, “So she was the most powerful woman–your argument that there were others before Michelle doesn’t hold water here because Condi represented something totally different.”

    I agree she actually had POWER and therefore was a BIGGER threat that Michelle Obama. Yet you and the rest of the “don’t make any sense” set keep trying to say, “that Michelle Obama is the most powerful black woman we have every seen and therefore the reason for all the hate.” Whatever power Michelle has it comes from being married to Barack…meaning HE not she has some power. She is purely a symbol in the background like all other first ladies. Condi actually had a job. She had pull. I would argue that she was more powerful in her time than Michelle Obama.

    You said, “Tell that to the racists that you have spent the last three years calling Michelle everything but a child of God they have nothing to fear. I don’t think they know their roles are secure, THEIR insecurities are drowning them out.”

    Exactly you are talking about racist-people known for living in fear–while I’m talking about common everyday white folks. They don’t see her as a threat. I imagine most of you must not associate with too many white people. White women see ASIAN women as a threat…not black women.

    You said, “Sounds like you think Michelle is one of those unicorns also. ”

    She IS and the number prove it. Denial won’t change the situation.

    You said, “My sister raised 3 college kids alone, sound like a stereotype? She is now one of the top technology experts in the country, and her kids are adults and raising traditional families as well. And her sorors are the same, and we are always laughing about the double takes when colleagues meet her the first time. Michelle has commented herself that there are plenty professional Black women like her, and she wants young Black girls and women to see themselves in her. Look at Valerie Jarrett, Desiree Rogers, etc. If you stop watching so much trash tv and look around you might learn something.”

    Plenty? NO! Only about 19% of black people even have a bachelor’s degree. No is denying that there are professional black women. The problem here comes when black women actually sit around believing those are the MAJORITY or even HALF of the black female population: They are not. The vast majority of black women do not have a college education. If you stop sticking your head up your put and actually read something you might learn something.

    You said, “70 % of Black women college grads get married. Sure stats are often skewed, but when they are slanted in a way that does not make us look like spinsters it’s never blasted from the rooftops, is it.”

    Again you are talking about a SMALL group of people. College educated black women aren’t the majority. Those are most often the individuals getting on TV talking about their marriage woes…not the hood chicks. So something is amiss even with the link you offered. I can go across the internet right now and find 50 or so articles about marriage evading college educated black women.

    You said, “Yes, and Black people who disagree with Condi being a war criminal (me being one of them) are making the same amount of noise as Palin & Co. bitching about Michelle trying to get kids to eat right, or her wearing sleeveless tops, or not loving her country, or, or… Talk about apples & oranges. I actually find her upbringing interesting esp growing up in the deep South- but still think she’s a criminal because of her actions.”

    If you say so. So it’s okay for you to bitch about Condi but it’s not okay for them to bitch about Michelle? Alrighty then.
    .
    You said, “How do you know she did not pick the questions? Obama also talked about Black women he had relationships with, interesting why she didn’t ask about them, isn’t it.”

    If you did you research you would know this…they have a job to do and they are typically told what question TO ASK. Please refer to Chris Brown’s last interview with Good Morning America.

    You said, “I don’t know much about Ford’s career other than the controversial ad, but now you can prove to me that his career tanked because he married a White woman. Was it the same way Clarence Thomas’s career flopped because he married a White woman?”

    Clarence Thomas didn’t have a career in politics. He had one in LAW. Again and apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. ran for a public office. There is a difference. And yes, the white woman shot his career to hell (though I am sure there were other bumps in the road). Google him.

    You said, “A lot of the ugly comments I’ve heard about her don’t even mention Barack-it’s often HER they have a problem with and that’s telling.”

    I’ve heard this from BLACK PEOPLE too. I’ve heard black people call her unattrative. So, it’s not just the white folks doing this.

    You said, “Now I know you are out of your freaking mind. No self respecting Black woman is going to generalize ALL Black women like this. If you are Black and this is all you see around you then you need to move. Seriously. Or maybe you are a White troll as suggested above. Sorry to disappoint but I don’t fit into any little ugly boxes, and neither of my friends/colleagues ‘popping out babies’ and we’re all 100% Black, and not looking for a pat on the back either.”

    I’m just honest. With a 70% out of wedlock rate it’s true black women aren’t doing anything to combat the stereotype. Keep living in denial. It would be different if that number were 10% but no over half of black children are born out of wedlock and a great deal of black women have their children by more than ONE man. It’s not about self-respect. These chicks don’t represent me. It’s about reality. The welfare queen stereotype has largely stuck because black women have done NOTHING as a collective to combat it. You keep pointing to yourself and your friends….you are not the only black women out here. Open your eyes.

    You said, “And you are not the only one who is using it, as much as you’d like to think you’re unique.”

    Try using logic and not resorting to personal attacks because you don’t like my thoughts. I never said I was the only individual using anything.

  • Justsaying…

    @BluTopaz

    You said, “Why would he do that, when Terry McMillan wrote WTE? And who said SATC was based on WTE? How do you know it wasn’t based on Girlfriends, or even Living Single?”

    It’s a fact that HBO did not deny. You can look it up. I think he pitched them an idea for a show about four black women and they stole the concept and made Sex and The City. I read about it not too long ago. The case was settled.

    You said, “Even if this was true, it still does not negate that it’s a hugely popular theme with a lot of single White women because it resonates with them. And I’ll ask it again–do you see this being framed as a White women’s problem? And yep, I’ll bring up White people on a Black blog because none of us are in a vacuum, and why Black women are constantly targeted with the broad brush of being one demographic.”

    And I’ll say it again…it’s not really a white woman’s problem because white women collectively ARE getting married. They may not be staying married but they are getting there and therefore are not lacking for men. That is simply what it comes down to with them. They don’t have the single market on lock.

    You said, “And you’re trying to say the media is not malicious in its constant framing as Black women as non-marriage material, esp, since there are plenty Black women who are married and happy who we never seem to hear from on CNN-guess they don’t exist.”

    How can it be malicious when it’s usually BLACK WOMEN who volunteer to speak on camera during these programs? It would be one thing if black women weren’t being used in news segment about themselves but that is not the case. There are black women like Sherri Shepherd (who has a man) jumping up and volunteering for this stuff. And if you call 29-30% plenty I’m going to have to give you the side-eye.

    You said, “So she was the most powerful woman–your argument that there were others before Michelle doesn’t hold water here because Condi represented something totally different.”

    I agree she actually had POWER and therefore was a BIGGER threat that Michelle Obama. Yet you and the rest of the “don’t make any sense” set keep trying to say, “that Michelle Obama is the most powerful black woman we have every seen and therefore the reason for all the hate.” Whatever power Michelle has it comes from being married to Barack…meaning HE not she has some power. She is purely a symbol in the background like all other first ladies. Condi actually had a job. She had pull. I would argue that she was more powerful in her time than Michelle Obama.

    You said, “Tell that to the racists that you have spent the last three years calling Michelle everything but a child of God they have nothing to fear. I don’t think they know their roles are secure, THEIR insecurities are drowning them out.”

    Exactly you are talking about racist-people known for living in fear–while I’m talking about common everyday white folks. They don’t see her as a threat. I imagine most of you must not associate with too many white people. White women see ASIAN women as a threat…not black women.

    You said, “Sounds like you think Michelle is one of those unicorns also. ”

    She IS and the number prove it. Denial won’t change the situation.

    You said, “My sister raised 3 college kids alone, sound like a stereotype? She is now one of the top technology experts in the country, and her kids are adults and raising traditional families as well. And her sorors are the same, and we are always laughing about the double takes when colleagues meet her the first time. Michelle has commented herself that there are plenty professional Black women like her, and she wants young Black girls and women to see themselves in her. Look at Valerie Jarrett, Desiree Rogers, etc. If you stop watching so much trash tv and look around you might learn something.”

    Plenty? NO! Only about 19% of black people even have a bachelor’s degree. No is denying that there are professional black women. The problem here comes when black women actually sit around believing those are the MAJORITY or even HALF of the black female population: They are not. The vast majority of black women do not have a college education. If you stop sticking your head up your put and actually read something you might learn something.

    You said, “70 % of Black women college grads get married. Sure stats are often skewed, but when they are slanted in a way that does not make us look like spinsters it’s never blasted from the rooftops, is it.”

    Again you are talking about a SMALL group of people. College educated black women aren’t the majority. Those are most often the individuals getting on TV talking about their marriage woes…not the hood chicks. So something is amiss even with the link you offered. I can go across the internet right now and find 50 or so articles about marriage evading college educated black women.

    You said, “Yes, and Black people who disagree with Condi being a war criminal (me being one of them) are making the same amount of noise as Palin & Co. —- about Michelle trying to get kids to eat right, or her wearing sleeveless tops, or not loving her country, or, or… Talk about apples & oranges. I actually find her upbringing interesting esp growing up in the deep South- but still think she’s a criminal because of her actions.”

    If you say so. So it’s okay for you to complain about Condi but it’s not okay for them to bitch about Michelle? Alrighty then.
    .
    You said, “How do you know she did not pick the questions? Obama also talked about Black women he had relationships with, interesting why she didn’t ask about them, isn’t it.”

    If you did you research you would know this…they have a job to do and they are typically told what question TO ASK. Please refer to Chris Brown’s last interview with Good Morning America.

    You said, “I don’t know much about Ford’s career other than the controversial ad, but now you can prove to me that his career tanked because he married a White woman. Was it the same way Clarence Thomas’s career flopped because he married a White woman?”

    Clarence Thomas didn’t have a career in politics. He had one in LAW. Again and apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. ran for a public office. There is a difference. And yes, the white woman shot his career to hell (though I am sure there were other bumps in the road). Google him.

    You said, “A lot of the ugly comments I’ve heard about her don’t even mention Barack-it’s often HER they have a problem with and that’s telling.”

    I’ve heard this from BLACK PEOPLE too. I’ve heard black people call her unattractive. So, it’s not just the white folks doing this.

    You said, “Now I know you are out of your freaking mind. No self respecting Black woman is going to generalize ALL Black women like this. If you are Black and this is all you see around you then you need to move. Seriously. Or maybe you are a White troll as suggested above. Sorry to disappoint but I don’t fit into any little ugly boxes, and neither of my friends/colleagues ‘popping out babies’ and we’re all 100% Black, and not looking for a pat on the back either.”

    I’m just honest. With a 70% out of wedlock rate it’s true black women aren’t doing anything to combat the stereotype. Keep living in denial. It would be different if that number were 10% but no over half of black children are born out of wedlock and a great deal of black women have their children by more than ONE man. It’s not about self-respect. These chicks don’t represent me. It’s about reality. The welfare queen stereotype has largely stuck because black women have done NOTHING as a collective to combat it. You keep pointing to yourself and your friends….you are not the only black women out here. Open your eyes.

    You said, “And you are not the only one who is using it, as much as you’d like to think you’re unique.”

    Try using logic and not resorting to personal attacks because you don’t like my thoughts. I never said I was the only individual using anything.

    *Had trouble posting this comment no doubt because the profanity in your quoted comments. So I started a new thread and edited out some words.

  • Justsaying…

    You said, “Why would he do that, when Terry McMillan wrote WTE? And who said SATC was based on WTE? How do you know it wasn’t based on Girlfriends, or even Living Single?”

    It’s a fact that HBO did not deny. You can look it up. I think he pitched them an idea for a show about four black women and they stole the concept and made Sex and The City. I read about it not too long ago. The case was settled.

    You said, “Even if this was true, it still does not negate that it’s a hugely popular theme with a lot of single White women because it resonates with them. And I’ll ask it again–do you see this being framed as a White women’s problem? And yep, I’ll bring up White people on a Black blog because none of us are in a vacuum, and why Black women are constantly targeted with the broad brush of being one demographic.”

    And I’ll say it again…it’s not really a white woman’s problem because white women collectively ARE getting married. They may not be staying married but they are getting there and therefore are not lacking for men. That is simply what it comes down to with them. They don’t have the single market on loc.

    You said, “And you’re trying to say the media is not malicious in its constant framing as Black women as non-marriage material, esp, since there are plenty Black women who are married and happy who we never seem to hear from on CNN-guess they don’t exist.”

    How can it be malicious when it’s usually BLACK WOMEN who volunteer to speak on camera during these programs? It would be one thing if black women weren’t being used in news segment about themselves but that is not the case. There are black women like Sherri Shepherd (who has a man) jumping up and volunteering for this stuff. And if you call 29-30% plenty I’m going to have to give you the side eye.

    You said, “So she was the most powerful woman–your argument that there were others before Michelle doesn’t hold water here because Condi represented something totally different.”

    I agree she actually had POWER and therefore was a BIGGER threat that Michelle Obama. Yet you and the rest of the “don’t make any sense” set keep trying to say, “that Michelle Obama is the most powerful black woman we have every seen and therefore the reason for all the hate.” Whatever power Michelle has it comes from being married to Barack…meaning HE not she has some power. She is purely a symbol in the background like all other first ladies. Condi actually had a job. She had pull. I would argue that she was more powerful in her time than Michelle Obama.

    You said, “Tell that to the racists that you have spent the last three years calling Michelle everything but a child of God they have nothing to fear. I don’t think they know their roles are secure, THEIR insecurities are drowning them out.”

    Exactly you are talking about racist-people known for living in fear–while I’m talking about common everyday white folks. They don’t see her as a threat. I imagine most of you must not associate with too many white people. White women see ASIAN women as a threat…not black women.

    You said, “Sounds like you think Michelle is one of those unicorns also. ”

    She IS and the numbers prove it. Denial won’t change the situation.

    You said, “My sister raised 3 college kids alone, sound like a stereotype? She is now one of the top technology experts in the country, and her kids are adults and raising traditional families as well. And her sorors are the same, and we are always laughing about the double takes when colleagues meet her the first time. Michelle has commented herself that there are plenty professional Black women like her, and she wants young Black girls and women to see themselves in her. Look at Valerie Jarrett, Desiree Rogers, etc. If you stop watching so much trash tv and look around you might learn something.”

    Plenty? NO! Only about 19% of black people even have a bachelor’s degree. No is denying that there are professional black women. The problem here comes when black women actually sit around believing those are the MAJORITY or even HALF of the black female population: They are not. The vast majority of black women do not have a college education and almost half don’t complete high school. If you stop sticking your head up your put and actually read something you might learn something.

    You said, “70 % of Black women college grads get married. Sure stats are often skewed, but when they are slanted in a way that does not make us look like spinsters it’s never blasted from the rooftops, is it.”

    Again you are talking about a SMALL group of people. College educated black women aren’t the majority. Those are most often the individuals getting on TV talking about their marriage woes…not lower class less educated chicks. So something is amiss even with the link you offered. I can go across the internet right now and find 50 or so articles about marriage evading college educated black women.

    You said, “Yes, and Black people who disagree with Condi being a war criminal (me being one of them) are making the same amount of noise as Palin & Co. bitching about Michelle trying to get kids to eat right, or her wearing sleeveless tops, or not loving her country, or, or… Talk about apples & oranges. I actually find her upbringing interesting esp growing up in the deep South- but still think she’s a criminal because of her actions.”

    If you say so. But don’t get mad at someone for doing something you are just as guilty of doing.
    .
    You said, “How do you know she did not pick the questions? Obama also talked about Black women he had relationships with, interesting why she didn’t ask about them, isn’t it.”

    If you did you research you would know this…they have a job to do and they are typically told what questions TO ASK. Please refer to Chris Brown’s last interview with Good Morning America.

    You said, “I don’t know much about Ford’s career other than the controversial ad, but now you can prove to me that his career tanked because he married a White woman. Was it the same way Clarence Thomas’s career flopped because he married a White woman?”

    Clarence Thomas didn’t have a career in politics. He had one in LAW. Again and apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. ran for a public office. There is a difference. And yes, the white woman shot his career to hell (though I am sure there were other bumps in the road). Google him.

    You said, “A lot of the ugly comments I’ve heard about her don’t even mention Barack-it’s often HER they have a problem with and that’s telling.”

    I’ve heard this from BLACK PEOPLE too. I’ve heard black people call her unattractive. So, it’s not just the white folks doing this.

    You said, “Now I know you are out of your freaking mind. No self respecting Black woman is going to generalize ALL Black women like this. If you are Black and this is all you see around you then you need to move. Seriously. Or maybe you are a White troll as suggested above. Sorry to disappoint but I don’t fit into any little ugly boxes, and neither of my friends/colleagues ‘popping out babies’ and we’re all 100% Black, and not looking for a pat on the back either.”

    I’m just honest. With a 70% out of wedlock rate it’s true black women aren’t doing anything to combat the stereotype. Keep living in denial. It would be different if that number were 10% but no over half of black children are born out of wedlock and a great deal of black women have their children by more than ONE man. It’s not about self-respect. These women don’t represent me so no self-respect is lost. It’s about reality. The welfare queen stereotype has largely stuck because black women have done NOTHING as a collective to combat it. You keep pointing to yourself and your friends….you are not the only black women out here. Open your eyes.

    You said, “And you are not the only one who is using it, as much as you’d like to think you’re unique.”

    Try using logic and not resorting to personal attacks because you don’t like my thoughts. I never said I was the only individual using anything.

  • Justsaying…

    Word! And it’s amazing that this article was even post on this site.

  • Justsaying…

    You said, “Why would he do that, when Terry McMillan wrote WTE? And who said SATC was based on WTE? How do you know it wasn’t based on Girlfriends, or even Living Single?”

    It’s a fact that HBO did not deny. You can look it up. I think he pitched them an idea for a show about four black women and they stole the concept and made Sex and The City. I read about it not too long ago. The case was settled.

    You said, “Even if this was true, it still does not negate that it’s a hugely popular theme with a lot of single White women because it resonates with them. And I’ll ask it again–do you see this being framed as a White women’s problem? And yep, I’ll bring up White people on a Black blog because none of us are in a vacuum, and why Black women are constantly targeted with the broad brush of being one demographic.”

    And I’ll say it again…it’s not really a white woman’s problem because white women collectively ARE getting married. They may not be staying married but they are getting there and therefore are not lacking for men. That is simply what it comes down to with them. They don’t have the single market on loc.

    You said, “And you’re trying to say the media is not malicious in its constant framing as Black women as non-marriage material, esp, since there are plenty Black women who are married and happy who we never seem to hear from on CNN-guess they don’t exist.”

    How can it be malicious when it’s usually BLACK WOMEN who volunteer to speak on camera during these programs? It would be one thing if black women weren’t being used in news segment about themselves but that is not the case. There are black women like Sherri Shepherd (who has a man) jumping up and volunteering for this stuff. And if you call 29-30% plenty I’m going to have to give you the side eye.

    You said, “So she was the most powerful woman–your argument that there were others before Michelle doesn’t hold water here because Condi represented something totally different.”

    I agree she actually had POWER and therefore was a BIGGER threat that Michelle Obama. Yet you and the rest of the “don’t make any sense” set keep trying to say, “that Michelle Obama is the most powerful black woman we have every seen and therefore the reason for all the hate.” Whatever power Michelle has it comes from being married to Barack…meaning HE not she has some power. She is purely a symbol in the background like all other first ladies. Condi actually had a job. She had pull. I would argue that she was more powerful in her time than Michelle Obama.

    You said, “Tell that to the racists that you have spent the last three years calling Michelle everything but a child of God they have nothing to fear. I don’t think they know their roles are secure, THEIR insecurities are drowning them out.”

    Exactly you are talking about racist-people known for living in fear–while I’m talking about common everyday white folks. They don’t see her as a threat. I imagine most of you must not associate with too many white people. White women see ASIAN women as a threat…not black women.

    You said, “Sounds like you think Michelle is one of those unicorns also. ”

    She IS and the numbers prove it. Denial won’t change the situation.

    You said, “My sister raised 3 college kids alone, sound like a stereotype? She is now one of the top technology experts in the country, and her kids are adults and raising traditional families as well. And her sorors are the same, and we are always laughing about the double takes when colleagues meet her the first time. Michelle has commented herself that there are plenty professional Black women like her, and she wants young Black girls and women to see themselves in her. Look at Valerie Jarrett, Desiree Rogers, etc. If you stop watching so much trash tv and look around you might learn something.”

    Plenty? NO! Only about 19% of black people even have a bachelor’s degree. No is denying that there are professional black women. The problem here comes when black women actually sit around believing those are the MAJORITY or even HALF of the black female population: They are not. The vast majority of black women do not have a college education and almost half don’t complete high school. If you stop sticking your head up your put and actually read something you might learn something.

    You said, “70 % of Black women college grads get married. Sure stats are often skewed, but when they are slanted in a way that does not make us look like spinsters it’s never blasted from the rooftops, is it.”

    Again you are talking about a SMALL group of people. College educated black women aren’t the majority. Those are most often the individuals getting on TV talking about their marriage woes…not lower class less educated chicks. So something is amiss even with the link you offered. I can go across the internet right now and find 50 or so articles about marriage evading college educated black women.

    Continued…

  • Justsaying…

    You said, “Yes, and Black people who disagree with Condi being a war criminal (me being one of them) are making the same amount of noise as Palin & Co. bitching about Michelle trying to get kids to eat right, or her wearing sleeveless tops, or not loving her country, or, or… Talk about apples & oranges. I actually find her upbringing interesting esp growing up in the deep South- but still think she’s a criminal because of her actions.”

    If you say so. But don’t get mad at someone for doing something you are just as guilty of doing.
    .
    You said, “How do you know she did not pick the questions? Obama also talked about Black women he had relationships with, interesting why she didn’t ask about them, isn’t it.”

    If you did you research you would know this…they have a job to do and they are typically told what questions TO ASK. Please refer to Chris Brown’s last interview with Good Morning America.

    You said, “I don’t know much about Ford’s career other than the controversial ad, but now you can prove to me that his career tanked because he married a White woman. Was it the same way Clarence Thomas’s career flopped because he married a White woman?”

    Clarence Thomas didn’t have a career in politics. He had one in LAW. Again and apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. ran for a public office. There is a difference. And yes, the white woman shot his career to hell (though I am sure there were other bumps in the road). Google him.

    You said, “A lot of the ugly comments I’ve heard about her don’t even mention Barack-it’s often HER they have a problem with and that’s telling.”

    I’ve heard this from BLACK PEOPLE too. I’ve heard black people call her unattractive. So, it’s not just the white folks doing this.

    You said, “Now I know you are out of your freaking mind. No self respecting Black woman is going to generalize ALL Black women like this. If you are Black and this is all you see around you then you need to move. Seriously. Or maybe you are a White troll as suggested above. Sorry to disappoint but I don’t fit into any little ugly boxes, and neither of my friends/colleagues ‘popping out babies’ and we’re all 100% Black, and not looking for a pat on the back either.”

    I’m just honest. With a 70% out of wedlock rate it’s true black women aren’t doing anything to combat the stereotype. Keep living in denial. It would be different if that number were 10% but no over half of black children are born out of wedlock and a great deal of black women have their children by more than ONE man. It’s not about self-respect. These women don’t represent me so no self-respect is lost. It’s about reality. The welfare queen stereotype has largely stuck because black women have done NOTHING as a collective to combat it. You keep pointing to yourself and your friends….you are not the only black women out here. Open your eyes.

    You said, “And you are not the only one who is using it, as much as you’d like to think you’re unique.”

    Try using logic and not resorting to personal attacks because you don’t like my thoughts. I never said I was the only individual using anything.

    **I broke my comment down because it was NOT post.

  • Justsaying…

    You said, “Yes, and Black people who disagree with Condi being a war criminal (me being one of them) are making the same amount of noise as Palin & Co. —–about Michelle trying to get kids to eat right, or her wearing sleeveless tops, or not loving her country, or, or… Talk about apples & oranges. I actually find her upbringing interesting esp growing up in the deep South- but still think she’s a criminal because of her actions.”

    If you say so. But don’t get mad at someone for doing something you are just as guilty of doing.
    .
    You said, “How do you know she did not pick the questions? Obama also talked about Black women he had relationships with, interesting why she didn’t ask about them, isn’t it.”

    If you did you research you would know this…they have a job to do and they are typically told what questions TO ASK. Please refer to Chris Brown’s last interview with Good Morning America.

    You said, “I don’t know much about Ford’s career other than the controversial ad, but now you can prove to me that his career tanked because he married a White woman. Was it the same way Clarence Thomas’s career flopped because he married a White woman?”

    Clarence Thomas didn’t have a career in politics. He had one in LAW. Again and apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. ran for a public office. There is a difference. And yes, the white woman shot his career to hell (though I am sure there were other bumps in the road). Google him.

    Continued…

  • Justsaying…

    You said, “A lot of the ugly comments I’ve heard about her don’t even mention Barack-it’s often HER they have a problem with and that’s telling.”

    I’ve heard this from BLACK PEOPLE too. I’ve heard black people call her unattractive. So, it’s not just the white folks doing this.

    You said, “Now I know you are out of your freaking mind. No self respecting Black woman is going to generalize ALL Black women like this. If you are Black and this is all you see around you then you need to move. Seriously. Or maybe you are a White troll as suggested above. Sorry to disappoint but I don’t fit into any little ugly boxes, and neither of my friends/colleagues ‘popping out babies’ and we’re all 100% Black, and not looking for a pat on the back either.”

    I’m just honest. With a 70% out of wedlock rate it’s true black women aren’t doing anything to combat the stereotype. Keep living in denial. It would be different if that number were 10% but no over half of black children are born out of wedlock and a great deal of black women have their children by more than ONE man. It’s not about self-respect. These women don’t represent me so no self-respect is lost. It’s about reality. The welfare queen stereotype has largely stuck because black women have done NOTHING as a collective to combat it. You keep pointing to yourself and your friends….you are not the only black women out here. Open your eyes.

    You said, “And you are not the only one who is using it, as much as you’d like to think you’re unique.”

    I never said I was the only individual using anything. Please stop with the personal attacks.

  • Justsaying…

    *I brought my comment down because it wasn’t posting.

  • Justsaying…

    *Broke

  • http://twitter.com/BhamExaminer KHarper

    I hope you’ll forgive me for writing here since I’m not a black woman ( I saw several commenters say this was exclusively for black women).

    You know what statistic I always remember? When I was about to graduate from college in 1999, I remember reading that the largest population of either degree seeking college students, or graduating college students (I can’t remember exactly) was black women.

  • Davis

    Do you want to know why all other races dont like the black race? Because of their inability to act civilized, bringing down the value of neighborhoods, the fact that 52% of them are leeching off the welfare system, over crowding the prisons, and the biggest carriers of STD’s as well as lowest IQ compared to ALL other races.

  • Lolabadchick

    BLACK WOMEN HAVE BEEN UNDER ATTACK WAY BEFORE MISS OBAMA!!!!

    AND NO ONE AS COME FORTH TO PROTECT BLACK WOMEN…. NOT EVER BLACK MAN. MANY TIMES BLACK WOMAN HAVE STOOD UP FOR BLACK MEN!!!!! WHERE’S THE LOVE!

    BLACK WOMEN LOOK AT YOURSELF AND CHANGE THE THINGS YOU BELIEVE NEED TO BE CHANGE… LOVE YOURSELF!! YOU DON’T NEED A MAN OR THE MEDIA TO TELL YOU, YOUR B E A U T I F U L!!! YOU MUST OWN IT.

    I MUST SAY, WEIGHT IS A REAL ISSUE IN THE BLACK COMMUNITY. THAT MUST BE UNDER CONTORL.

    BLACK WOMAN MUST THINK BIG AND FOLLOW THEIR DREAMS. TEACH YOUR CHILD EDUCATION COMES F I R S T!!!! THAT IS THE KEY TO SUCCESS!

    S T O P LOVING MEN THAT DON’T HONOR OR LOVE U!!!

    S T O P HAVING CHILDREN WITH THESE TYPE OF MEN THAT DON’T CARE TO LOVE THEIR OWN CHILD!!!!!!

    IT’S GREAT TO FALL IN LOVE BUT NOT EVER SITUATION SHOULD BEAR A CHILD!

    FIN!

  • nicthommi

    I’m not sure if I think it’s so much “attacks” so much as people claiming what is authentically black.
    What I think I hear more often is that if you see a successful and attractive black woman, then she is anomaly, and usually it’s attached to a claim that we have nothing to be proud of, since only about five of us have made it.
    But this is the same discussion that occurred when the Cosby Show came out, and I’m sure that it has happened at other points in the past when positive, successful, well-educated blacks were put forth as being an example of a new paradigm.
    It’s funny, b/c if women of other races are complimented and their “best” examples are put forth as proof of the “trend,” no one blinks, but mention someone like the FLOTUS as an example of the strides that black women have made and suddenly it turns into “big deal, it’s not like any other black women are REALLY like her.”

  • Beauzeaux

    I love love love Michelle Obama. She’s intelligent, accomplished, generous, kind, and gorgeous. I’ve seen very little criticism of HER except from racist wingnuts who can’t stand the idea of a happy, prosperous, loving Black family even existing — much less one in the White House.
    The mainstream media has always been willing to propagate any bullshit theories about Black women. I think it’s getting a little bit harder for them to do so without pushback.The Kanezawa piece kicked up an instant shitstorm and was universally denounced.

    I’m 69 years old and just starting my education about privilege of all sorts. Thanks to the internet and sites like this. I’m grateful. Now back to my usual lurking.

  • Arjeri

    @QueenOfNewCastle:
    “Wow. The two boogeymen for black women: black men and white women. Indeed, you do need help.”

    NO, YOU NEED HELP, QueenofNewCastle (or should we call you Trash ofNewCastle).

    The boogeyman, as you call it, for Black women is the same boogeyman for Black men – WHITE PEOPLE, including white female hags like you. The difference is that Black women have never forgotten or chosen to kiss their ENEMIES ass like Black men, to help them in their agenda against ALL BLACK PEOPLE.

    GTFOH with your “defend Black men to the end” and at the same time defending “white women as the ish”, which they are not. You are not the ish and never will be.

    Go back to hanging on some Black man’s d*ck and take your bullsh*t with you.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Laila Apples

    And all I have asked was for you to produce ONE SINGLE thing that I have actually said on that case and you havent. You just keep spreading the lies and hoping it will stick because some in here may not like what I have to say about other things. How sad. You arent woman enough to actually debate the things I have said so you INVENT things I havent said.

    I hope you are sanctioned by this site so you dont go on to spread more false accusations against other contributors you dont agree with. Youre a COWARD!

  • Arjeri

    @QueenofNewCastle (a.k. a. TrashofNewCastle)

    There is no slander or libel going on in what anybody said, GTFOH. They just gave their opinions, truthful ones at that!

    LOL at your ‘I want a formal apology from you for having lied to another poster”. Ridiculous, she can post what she wants, nobody has to agree with you.

  • Laila Apples

    As I said before QONC, I firmly stand by ALL of my accusations of you.I’ll let the editors of this site and other sites do their job and look into their own archives.Again you showed your concern for the criminals well being more than you did for that little girl.I’ll never understand how someone can be so concerned about people who taped themselves in the act of raping a child getting a fair trial.Especially when one of those allegedly involved were related to the sheriff or the police.If that ain’t support I don’t know what is.And ain’t sh** cowardly about me boo.I’m not going to dig up your every verbal rantings against black women because quite frankly you’re a non motherf***ing factor.

  • Laila Apples

    Hi Arjeri.I thank you for your standing up for my freedom of speech and of an opinion.QONC is sometimes here and at other sites defending black men for behaving badly.How can someone be concerned with some rapists,at least one of the accused was related to a police official or sheriff, experiencing some sort of racism, an unfair trial,or lack of evidence to convict the criminals when they taped themselves in the act of rape?They also made phone calls to others to come and participate in the rape.Where was the sympathy or support for the child is what I want to know?

  • Tomi-chan

    *sigh* I don’t think you know what the word opinion even MEANS. It’s not an opinion if you’re stating it as a fact. There is a difference between saying “So and so has a history of sympathizing with rapists” and “I think so and so is a rapist apologist.” The latter is what you would call an OPINION. And if you can’t differentiate between those two sentences… well, I thank my stars and garters this is only an internet forum. Otherwise slander and libel WOULD be valid defenses. Which they are not.

    QONC, I may disagree with you sometimes but I would advise you step away from this… It’s useless to argue fact with someone who is immune to reason (not directed at anyone in particular…). The same goes doubly for cattiness over words exchanged on the internet. Let’s not derail the conversation further. There are better things we can be discussing, please don’t reduce Clutch into a petty after-school “beat-em-up” forum. Take. It. Out-side.

  • Brandon Pilcher

    In April it was Cassandra Dorius, a postdoctoral fellow at the University of Michigan Institute for Social Research, whose study found that 59 percent of Black women have children by multiple fathers.

    This is not what Dorius reported. She said that 59% of black women who had more than one child had them by more than one father. Her study did not count those black women who had no children or had only one child (who IIRC are in the majority anyway). The truth isn’t as demeaning to black women in general as you claim.

  • Laila Apples

    @Tomi Chan I am stating both as a fact and an opinion that Queen of New Castle is a person who sympathizes with and makes excuses for rapists and/or black men behaving badly.The reason is because I have seen where Queen of New Castle has explicitly stated his support for these individuals.And other times the support is not explicitly stated but implied in many of it’s other comments on the internet.I find it very odd that this incident occurred some time ago and yet he is just now coming at me with this.

  • http://www.DryerBuzz.com Yalanda DryerBuzz.com

    We do Black Women a great disservice when we say “…Since the Presence of Michelle Obama.” Blogging the story of black women for more than a decade, and keeping sisters talking about the issue since 1993, I know for a fact there is a daily initiative to entertain and convince a demographic that Black women are to be considered inferior. What the system did not realize is that it would be able convince Black women that they are inferior. The system expected but a fight but does not get one. This is simply because within the gender of Black women there is now classism; a divide between Black Women who have and Black women who have not; educated and not; married and not; and the list goes on. In believing these studies, we are at dangerous point where Black women are becoming less philanthropic and choosing not to be caretakers of their community. They are far less involved in and working to keep their institutions open and safety nets alive. We must continue to counter the attacks before another generation starts believing the hype.

    Report: Professional Black Women Lack Sponsorship, Encouragement for Risk Taking at Work | League of Black Women http://bit.ly/iGP5uA

  • Jenell

    GREAT post

  • JustSaying…

    I just want to know why the hell should black women continue to be the “caretakers of their community” when the freaking “community” has seemingly abandoned black women??? I’m sorry but I think it’s about time black women took stock of their our lives and leave the mess behind. Standing by a community that is rotting away in decay, crime, abuse, etc isn’t working. I say black women need to get their own ish together and jump ship.

  • laura

    No, it’s not a disservice. RISING attacks. Operative word being rising. Please don’t diminish the message of the article by honing in on something insignificant.

  • asha

    Your facts are wrong. WHITE WOMEN are the largest demographic of people on welfare. So *I* should be me concerned that my tax dollars are being used to feed some white woman and her child(ren). The rest of your comment isn’t even worth responding to as it is idiotic, inaccurate, and racist. Get a life and stay off sites for Black women.

  • BeautyIAM

    Ok, seriously Clutch! You guys are gonna let this fly??????????????????

  • http://twitter.com/PinkLemonade14 Beatrice Baker

    I do agree that numerous attacks on the black woman has increased since first Lady Michelle Obama has graced the White House. I am a black woman and experience everyday that we (black women) tear each other down, look down on those who do not have the Ivy league degrees, do not or are not allowed to enroll our children in Jack and Jill or are part of the links and other exclusive black clubs!! Its a shame but we need to show more love towards each other and stop tearing each other down. We should learn to love our black sisters and lift each other up, not attack each other. I am not responsible for other black womens action, just for my own! I treat everyone like I want to be treated.

  • Arjeri

    I don’t think that some Black women haven’t fought because of classism – it’s pretty obvious that Black women – of ALL CLASSES – have been abandoned by the Black community, simply because we are not Black men. And most of the orgs that are supposed to speak up for us are run by men who could give a da*n about Black women for the most part. they’ve said a little on some things, but a very little only. It’s like the NAACP, operation Push, and all these other orgs have been paid off tonot say anything. Their silence is DEAFENING on all of the attacks, stats, lies coming at Black women daily.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Laila Apples

    Yes you keeping saying I said this and I said that but you have provided ZERO PROOF of any of it. No links, no quotes, no nothing. Just you repeating the SAME ACCUSATIONS without any proof to back it up. Again you are a coward. I offered you a link to your accusation of me and DEMANDED an apology if you were unable to prove that I actually said those things. It isnt up to the editors of this site or any other site to go on a fishing expedition to make your case for you. Its your job to prove your own claims. You havent and so therefore I can quite easily concluded that you are a lying sack of…

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Laila Apples

    And for the record I have NEVER asked you to dig up anything I have said about black women. I asked you, quite specifically, to show what I said about that rape case in Texas. You refused because you KNOW I never said anything about it. You were just hoping that if you repeat a lie enough times, people will believe you.

    From the blog: “We moderate comments and prohibit personal attacks, threats, spam, lewd images, or the promotion of your personal website.”

    What you said about me was a personal attack so you were breaching the terms of this site. Youre a coward and a phony and I can already tell that your faux concern for black women is motivated far more by your hatred of black men than the welfare of black women.

  • http://www.DryerBuzz.com Yalanda DryerBuzz.com

    We are the community (women and children). So what are we abandoning if not ourselves. Yes male run organizations and so-called leaders often forget about our plight, but that’s why we have our own orgs that we have to make sure are at the table. When Dr Dorothy Height couldn’t make the meeting at the White House with “the men folk,” the meeting should have been called off. Great concern should have been shown as to why she couldn’t attend. (it was the coldest day in hell i mean DC). But now the “leaders” gloat and as to which one has better access to the president when in fact our issues weren’t even addressed.

    We are not a community (of women and children) to be abandon. An abandoned community allows young women to graduate from institutions of higher learning with enormous debt whereas we have the way with all to infuse $60 million dollars a week in education and follow the example of Mary McLeod Bethune.

    Our survival is not about abandoning, its about coming together. But then when I think about it. Maybe you’re right. Just maybe Ida, Mary, Dorothy, Shirley, Fannie and Harriett set out alone to get it done because perhaps that’s the best way to do and get it done right. Is it time to jump ship? May the strong survive?

  • leelee

    Right, white women and those of other races don’t carry STDs, aren’t on welfare, never went to prison, etc. If you have such disdain for black women ask yourself why you would come on a website geared toward those very women. Racist, ignorant, small minded, uninteresting people are what disgust me so I stay clear of their websites. You should do the same and; your life will be less stressed because to spew such hate you have to be miserable.

  • Annaleisha

    Thanks for sharing that. Its good to have useful input from people, regardless of their race/gender.

  • LN

    I have to agree with “JustSayin”, just the other day my younger sister was talking some mess about how she wants to “build the black community” and “only marry a black man”. Mind you, she is 20 years old, just graduated college (summa cum laude and 2 years early) with a degree in environmental science (one of the FEW black women in the science department) and ALL her relationships with black men have ended in physical, sexual or emotional abuse, STARTING WHEN SHE WAS 15. I felt like wringing her neck! But I just calmly said, “Look baby girl, you need to marry someone who LOVES and RESPECTS you. If he HAPPENS to be black, that’s great! But if not, don’t sacrifice your own life and happiness to “build the black community””. That is the biggest bullshit I have EVER heard.

    I’m married to a black man. I dated white dudes, Asian dudes, and in the end my hubby was the best for me. But it was an INDIVIDUAL choice. Not a “black love” choice or an “I need to build the black community” choice.

    And I think that’s what a lot of black women don’t realize: BY MAKING EMPOWERED CHOICES FOR OURSELVES WE BUILD THE COMMUNITY!!

    The BEST WAY for us to build the community is to BUILD OURSELVES. To respect ourselves, to find HEALTHY LOVE for ourselves. The community starts with the individual.

    As for me, and my house, I will NEVER tell my daughter that “building the black community” means standing behind a black man and cleaning up his mess. HELL NAW. It means being the best she can be.

  • LN

    I appreciate this article because I think it’s powerful and correct in its assertion. I also think that it only applies to “Michelle Obama types”. Women who are happy, confident, intelligent, educated, fulfilled and in healthy relationships.

    Sometimes I feel that black women have very, well, selective vision. We pick and choose what we want to acknowledge in our communities.

    An unfortunate reality is that black women DO abort at higher rates, that a large PERCENTAGE of us are on welfare (I’m talking percents, not raw numbers), a large percentage of us do have children out of wedlock, and that we lag in many economic and social indicators.

    So, in some ways, the research cited in the article is correct. And we can’t argue with it. So what do we do next?

  • Jess

    How do you know for a fact that Black women abort at higher rates? I always learned, *up until this year *, that white women aborted at much higher rates (higher percentages AND higher numbers) than all non-white women, thus the high teen pregnancy rate among Black and hispanic girls, and low teen pregnancy rate among whites. the story changes whenever it’s expedient to whites. sorry,i don’t believe the abortion crap, anything to make Black women sound like the scourge of America and of the Black community.

  • JustSaying…

    @Yalanda

    You can have it! I quit the “black community bandwagon” a long time ago. As far as I’m concerned it’s not my problem. The best thing black women can do is get their ish together and get the hell out of dodge. Stop worrying about some bullshit they cannot control.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Just Saying…

    When you say that black women need to get out of the community, what does that actually mean? Does that mean she needs to get out of black neighborhoods? I am as far away from the or any black community. I am interracially married living in the UK which is more white than USA. In addition I dont live in multicultural London or Manchester but in an area that is even whiter than the country. Most of the non whites in my city are not even black. Still, despite having “left” the community, I am still seemingly affected by the mockery of black women. Its not anything I can escape because I am still black and female. Perhaps I am more shielded in the UK because this society is far more politically correct than America, but with the internet, word travels fast. I also happen to believe that black Afro-Caribs in this country happen to envy the “black community” in America for its achievements and solidarity. Black people in the UK havent exactly benefitted from not existing.

  • Isis

    @JustSaying I totally agree with you!!! Trying to keep the black community in tact is killing us. We need to let go of the baggage and keep it moving! We get so up in arms when someone hurts the black man but let someone do something to us that same dude ain’t nowhere to be found

  • Isis

    Again I agree with Justsaying

  • JustSaying…

    @Queenofnewcastle

    Simply put: black women need to do what is best for them. Forget worrying about all this other bullshit. This stuff about being “caretakers of the community” is pain foolishness. So I’m supposed to look out for someone that wouldn’t do the same for me? I don’t think so (and black women being honest with themselves know that’s usually the way it is). I refuse to uphold a group of people simply because we share race. Not happening. If it doesn’t effect me personally or someone close to me it’s not my problem.

  • http://www.DryerBuzz.com Yalanda DryerBuzz.com

    If such is the case that we should abandon each other, then why even reference Michelle Obama? Why even speak to the achievements of another if some feel they are so alone, put out, and abandoned?

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @JustSaying

    To be perfectly honest with you, I dont see black women looking out for anyone but herself. When you think of how we live, eat, spend our money, who we choose to involve in our personal lives… It just seems like an endless cycle of short term impulsive “ME” decisions. Just because these decisions end up hurting black women in the long run doesnt mean they were made with anyone other than them in mind. Doesnt matter if black women leave the black community. If she takes her value system with her, there will still be trouble.

    Also lets not pretend that black women dont get anything from this community. Who helps her with her children? For all this talk about black women and the church, I cant think of anyone other than black women accessing the services the church has to offer. In addition black women happen to feel dam comfortable in the community. Everyone looks like her, wear the same clothes, speaks the same language, has the same issues… Until black women become different people culturally and socio-economically I cant see her finding her place outside of the black community.

    Its very easy to condemn the black community instead of condemning the people who perpetuate everything that is both good and bad about it.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    Well it is certainly bad for those children involved especially when you consider the risk that a revolving door of men poses to young kids. Abuse both physical and sexual increases when the mother of those children have different men in her life. It is also not good psycholgically and practically spells instability for any ensuing relationship.

  • JustSaying…

    @Yalanda

    You are talking to the choir. Like I said, I don’t even see what Michelle Obama has to do with this conversation. I think it’s another way of ignoring reality and pointing to a scapegoat. Black women got issues..no denials on my part.

    @Queenofnewcastle

    You said, “To be perfectly honest with you, I dont see black women looking out for anyone but herself. When you think of how we live, eat, spend our money, who we choose to involve in our personal lives… It just seems like an endless cycle of short term impulsive “ME” decisions. Just because these decisions end up hurting black women in the long run doesnt mean they were made with anyone other than them in mind. Doesnt matter if black women leave the black community. If she takes her value system with her, there will still be trouble.”

    If this is the case they need to be smarter about it. I said black women should get their ish to together AND then jump ship. The ish together part needs to come first.

    You said, “Also lets not pretend that black women dont get anything from this community. Who helps her with her children? For all this talk about black women and the church, I cant think of anyone other than black women accessing the services the church has to offer.”

    The black church doesn’t typically help anyone but themselves…least of all financially. If black women get any help at all it’s probably coming from the system or even family (usually mama)…not some so-called organization in the so-called community. I don’t know what church you attend but I have yet to see one hand out money to single mothers. The church usually has its hand out asking for money…not giving it.

    You said, “In addition black women happen to feel dam comfortable in the community.”

    I agree…a segment of them do. They will learn–the hard way.

    You said, “Everyone looks like her, wear the same clothes, speaks the same language, has the same issues… Until black women become different people culturally and socio-economically I cant see her finding her place outside of the black community.”

    Again I agree that’s why I keep telling black women to get their ish together first. Drop this dead end culture because it is a cesspool and counterproductive anyway. Get your finanical weight up. And get out of dodge. There are plenty of places outside of hell..I have found them and others can too.

    You said, “Its very easy to condemn the black community instead of condemning the people who perpetuate everything that is both good and bad about it.”

    I condemn both (my comments on the first page of this thread).

  • Dawn

    @QueenofNewcastle…. sounds like you need a little counseling yourself, from what I have read… conversation closed!!!!

  • Tomi-chan

    @JustSayin…

    I actually finally agree with you, haha!

  • Jennifer

    Are all these comments on how terrible black women are from black women? Are you talking about yourselves? Shouldn’t this be something you attempt to work on rather than projecting your issues onto the rest of us? I don’t know recognize any black woman I know in these stats and criticisms. If this is you and your family and friends, maybe you need to take this energy and get your lives together.

    Stop projecting! Black people were not made in a factory. I am not like you nor do I have your life and experiences just because we are in the same skin tone range.

  • http://www.DryerBuzz.com Yalanda DryerBuzz.com

    @JustSaying…

    I took the conversation to my daughters who are all college age. I know I raised them in a “villiage,” but their sentiments were very much the same as the comments in this post and quite shocking to me. I asked them if they felt any camaraderie amongst black women as peers and they looked as if i was crazy. I also asked them if they felt the need to be part of associations and again I got the funny looks. In my day (sorry to use a cliche) but associations and community were the drive behind success. They went on to say they are not bonded by race and the “hue” of their skin (being on the lighter side) gives them more problems within the race than outside. This is deep.

  • QueenofNewcastle

    @Just Saying

    Thanks for your comments.

    Once black women have gotten themselves together, I dont think they would need to “jump ship.”

    I think black women in the church gain a since of belonging and purpose. Her friends are there, she has a place where her children are safe, she gets to put on her fancy clothes/hates, beautify herself, gossip, eat, and worship. For millions of black women, those feelings are probably priceless.

    Why would the church be handing out money to single mothers? That would be retarded. The church needs money just like the country club. I would argue that the church is like a country club for black women.

    Once black women drop their “dead end culture” the black community would probably not be dead end. Fixing one problem will solve a host of others.

  • JustSaying…

    @Yalanda

    You’re daughters are smart…be proud of them. They probably recognize something you don’t: Times have changed and so has the so-called black community. If black women ever want any type of peace of mind they need to leave that “be the caretakers of their community” stuff alone.

    @Queenofnewcastle

    You said, “Once black women have gotten themselves together, I dont think they would need to “jump ship.”

    Black women aren’t the only problem…they are simply HALF the problem and they can’t force the other half to come better so YEAH if they get themselves together there is very much a REASON to jump ship. Deal with bullshit or get out and find peace? It’s no contest.

    You said, “I think black women in the church gain a since of belonging and purpose. Her friends are there, she has a place where her children are safe, she gets to put on her fancy clothes/hates, beautify herself, gossip, eat, and worship. For millions of black women, those feelings are probably priceless.”

    Most of the black women I know who actually go to church are middle age or elderly. Their life is half-way over anyway. They might just be at peace at that point after going through some ish. The black church has become a circus and I think most black folks being honest recognize this reality.

    You said, “Why would the church be handing out money to single mothers? That would be retarded. The church needs money just like the country club. I would argue that the church is like a country club for black women.”

    You said the black church helps black women. I disagree unless we are talking solely about religion otherwise it doesn’t serve much of a purpose at all. I’m interested to know what kind of churches you have attended??? A country club where all the leaders are men and all the patrons are women? Naw come again.

    I equate it more to a holy trip to watch the chippendales. A bunch of dressed up male performers shake, move, sweat, shout, say Amen a few times, and get cash thrown at their feet….all in the name of the lord. Then they do it all over again next Sunday.

    You said, “Once black women drop their “dead end culture” the black community would probably not be dead end. Fixing one problem will solve a host of others.”

    I doubt it. Like I said…black women are only half the problem. Fixing their problems will open up their options not just in the world of men, but in business, money etc.

  • Davis

    I didn’t say all white women or men (im not white btw, but thats racsist for assuming so) but the OVERWHELMING majority IS. The % for welfare is 38% white 37% black, HOWEVER there is 72% white in the USA and 12.5% black. So again an OVERHELMING majority of blacks is on welfare. I guess the CDC beez racccciisssst with their factual stats on STD’s as well.

  • Davis

    The IQ distributions of other racial and ethnic groups in the United States are less well-studied. The Bell Curve (1994) stated that the average IQ African Americans was 85; Latino 89; White 103; Asian 106; and Jews 113. Asians score relatively higher on visuospatial than on verbal subtests. The few Amerindian populations that have been systematically tested, including Arctic Natives, tend to score worse on average than white populations but better on average than black populations.[61]

  • JustSaying…

    @ Davis

    You said, “I didn’t say all white women or men (im not white btw, but thats racsist for assuming so) but the OVERWHELMING majority IS. The % for welfare is 38% white 37% black, HOWEVER there is 72% white in the USA and 12.5% black. So again an OVERHELMING majority of blacks is on welfare. I guess the CDC beez racccciisssst with their factual stats on STD’s as well.”

    You are an idiot. You don’t even understand the numbers you are post. The majority of people on welfare are white (i.e., that 38%). There is an estimated 4 million (give or take) people on welfare. If there are 40 MILLION African Americans in this country how the hell are the OVERWHELMING (correct spelling of the word) majority of blacks on welfare dumbass??? Let’s look at the actual math…

    If there are 4 million people on welfare (and estimates do vary)…

    Whites- 38% of 4 million = 1,520,000
    Blacks-37% of 4 million= 1,480,000
    Others= 1,000,000

    You should have said: black people in this country have a disproportionate number (given overall population size) of people on welfare.

  • JustSaying…

    @Davis

    Oh and what were you saying about IQ?

    OWNED!

  • Tomi-chan
  • Davis

    I guess I will try to explain it alittle better, since your average IQ of 85 borders mildly retarded.

    52% of the total USA black population is on welfare. Us hispanics are well below that because we are not afraid to work and make an honest living.

  • JustSaying…

    @Davis

    Actually what you could do is try READING YOUR OWN FREAKING COMMENTS a little better.

    Let me refresh your memory. You said:

    “The % for welfare is 38% white 37% black, HOWEVER there is 72% white in the USA and 12.5% black. So again an OVERHELMING majority of blacks is on welfare. ”

    It’s right there honey: 37% of welfare recipients are black (which is true).

    Now you trying to switch it up to save face with a stat that you pulled out of your a-hole…

    You said, “52% of the total USA black population is on welfare. Us hispanics are well below that because we are not afraid to work and make an honest living.

    How can this be if 37% (1,480,000) welfare recipients are black???

    52% of 40 million is a little over 20 million sweetie.

    So now 21 million black people in this country are on welfare? Hmmm. You sir are a dumbass. Please believe if this were true we would NEVER hear the end of it

    Please go back to high school and MATH 101.

    And don’t flatter yourself, Hispanics are quickly becoming the face of crime in this country and are on damn near everyone’s list for deportation…hardly the model minority. It’s the Hispanics eating up foodstamps and not paying ish for public services…one more reason folks are pushing for deportation.

  • isolde

    Oh, ok, we’re playing racial shade? I really shouldn’t, but I’ll bite.

    ***************************************************************************************************
    52% of the total USA black population is on welfare. Us hispanics are well below that because we are not afraid to work and make an honest living.
    ***************************************************************************************************
    @Davis

    Wait . . . Um, don’t you need an SS# to collect welfare? :)

  • Davis

    Proportion and per capita are concepts that elude the you. More White people work and contribute to society, and more White people can identify their male parent. Also stating us Hispanics are illegal immigrants is rascist. Negros is the most rascist race in America as time and time again they always play the race card. And another point that never gets brought up is that a large percentage of white women on welfare are coalburners with a half-breed negrolit. I have been in this country 6 years and I speak and type better english then most negroes who have lived here their whole life.
    Here is a website with actual welfare stats as blacks are leading in EVERY category.

    http://aspe.hhs.gov/hsp/leavers99/race.htm#fig1

  • Davis

    @isolde says:
    I don’t need to collect welfare or GIBS ME DATS as I work for a living. I own my own home. I am married and have 2 childeren who know their father. I am a good parent as my childeren will graduate, but stats show your in all probability, WILL NOT. LMFAO!

  • JustSaying…

    @Davis

    Actually Davis those are concepts you can’t seem to grasp as you can’t formulate sentences to properly explain yourself. I’m simply pointing out the misconceptions in YOUR WORDS. Perhaps you should enroll in an English class. Hispanics like you make me grateful that Georgia passed our Immigration bill.

    “Because of their low incomes, Hispanics are the major population group most likely to use welfare: In 2004, 50 percent of Hispanic households used at least one form of welfare, compared to 47 percent of blacks and 18 percent of whites (see Figure 6).(20) In 2005, 13 percent of Hispanic households used food stamps, as opposed to five percent of white households. Puerto Rican households were more than four times more likely than whites to use food stamps and Mexicans almost three times more likely.(21) Non-citizens are generally ineligible for many forms of welfare; if many Hispanics were to gain citizenship, Hispanic welfare use would rise.”

    Source…

    http://www.amren.com/features/hispanics/index.html

    Eat your heart out. ^^^ The bottom of the barrel trying to point fingers. A shit load of stats on your people right there. Yeah I’m pushing for deportation!

  • Pingback: Black Women are "scientifically" proven less attractive than other women - Page 10 - CurlTalk

  • http://www.guerillasoul.com Sarah Djarnie

    Ok so I had a chance to read all of the comments above…. and I am actually appalled at some of the comments. Why should we abandon our communities why as black women should we “get out of dodge” no this is not the answer. Look at the end of the day we are race that needed each other from the beginning! I live in Bedford Stuyvesant and my goal is to try to reach to kids on my block by setting a good example. Should I do more? yes and I will..but I am not going to give up especially on young black people.

  • ellid

    @Davis –

    I don’t care if you’re Hispanic, white, or Vulcan. You’re a bigot. Pure and simple. Shame on you.

  • browniegirl360

    Oh really, then explain how many black men that have multiple children by multiple women and are in prison as opposed to college?

  • browniegirl360

    JustSaying…
    MAY 21, 2011 AT 10:42 PM
    I just want to know why the hell should black women continue to be the “caretakers of their community” when the freaking “community” has seemingly abandoned black women??? I’m sorry but I think it’s about time black women took stock of their our lives and leave the mess behind. Standing by a community that is rotting away in decay, crime, abuse, etc isn’t working. I say black women need to get their own ish together and jump ship.

    ================================================================

    Cosign 100% Black men have no alliance with or for black women, so why are black women sticking around? I jumped ship YEARS AGO and not look back! There are black men on and off the net bashing and degrading us in record numbers. Since Mr.Right is not distend to be black, then why spend what could be a lifetime waiting for one?

  • Tomi-chan

    Okay some serious B.S. that needs to be addressed:

    If a white person tans, they’re jealous of black people.
    If a black persons straightens their hair, it’s because they’re being oppressed by Eurocentricism? Seriously guys? Seriously?

    Both of them are styles and fads. Sometimes it crosses racial lines, sometimes it doesn’t. Everyone knows you look better tanned than pale. Even if you are black. Long wavy hair is kinda “the in” in the 80s it was a curly perm. It’s a style. Tell the Irish lass with the kinky hair she’s being racially oppressed when be both know for a goddamn fact it’s easier to manage a looser texture than constantly curling and frizzing hair.

    Do not underestimate the sensibilities of others.

  • browniegirl360

    Davis
    MAY 23, 2011 AT 12:22 AM
    @isolde says:
    I don’t need to collect welfare or GIBS ME DATS as I work for a living. I own my own home. I am married and have 2 childeren who know their father. I am a good parent as my childeren will graduate, but stats show your in all probability, WILL NOT. LMFAO!

    Typical wetback English that you are speaking here. Read below and weep…the truth abut you hispanics!

    http://www.amren.com/features/hispanics/index.html

    Income and Wealth

    Per capita income of Hispanics is one half that of non-Hispanic whites, and household net worth is less than one tenth.
    Fifty percent of Hispanic households use some form of welfare, the highest rate of any major population group.
    Crime

    Hispanics are 3.3 times more likely to be in prison than whites; they are 4.2 times more likely to be in prison for murder, and 5.8 times more likely to be in prison for felony drug crimes.
    Young Hispanics are 19 times more likely than young whites (and slightly more likely than young blacks) to be in youth gangs.
    Education

    Hispanics drop out of high school at three times the white rate and twice the black rate.
    Even third-generation Hispanics drop out of school at a higher rate than blacks and are less likely to be college graduates.
    From 1992 to 2003, Hispanic illiteracy in English rose from 35 percent to 44 percent.
    The average Hispanic 12th-grader reads and does math at the level of the average white 8th-grader.
    Families and Health

    At 43 percent, the Hispanic illegitimacy rate is twice the white rate, and Hispanic women have abortions at 2.7 times the white rate.
    Hispanics are three times more likely than whites not to have medical insurance, and die from AIDS and tuberculosis at three times the white rate.
    In California, the cost of free medical care for illegal aliens forced 60 hospitals to close between 1993 and 2003.
    Attitudes

    Only 33 percent of citizens of Hispanic origin consider themselves “Americans” first. The rest consider themselves either “Hispanic/Latino” or their former nationality first.

    http://www.youthtoday.org/view_article.cfm?article_id=4392

    The report – examining trends between 1988 and 2008 – notes that Hispanics, the fastest growing population in the United States, exhibit the lowest educational attainment levels among all racial and ethnic groups. Hispanic men were less likely to attain a degree than Hispanic women, and the disparity between the two is apparently growing.
    Hispanics have made the largest gains in high school completion but still rank last among ethnic groups measured, with only 70 percent of the Hispanic population graduating with a high school degree.
    Asian-Americans and whites lead in high school completion, college enrollment and degree attainment. Ninety-one percent of Asian-Americans and 88 percent of whites complete a high school degree, followed by African-Americans at 78 percent and American Indians at 71 percent. Asian-Americans were the most likely to complete a college degree, with persistence rates of 89 percent for four-year colleges and 67 percent for those who started at two-year institutions. This compares to the lowest degree persistence rate, held by African-Americans, 73 percent of whom will finish a degree at a four-year college and 47 percent at a two-year college.

    NOW PUT THIS IN YOUR CRACK PIPE AND SMOKE IT!!!! RACIST LOSER!!!!

  • JustSaying…

    Help yourself girl, but knock the rest of us not trying to hear that crap.

  • JustSaying…

    *don’t knock

  • Jennifer

    Sometimes I wonder if all this dark skin/light skin rivalry is real or imagined. I have never had any problems with a black woman with darker skin tone than I have. Never. Almost half of my friends are white/Asian/Hispanic and I have never been jealous of them either. I don’t know what it says about me, but I never heard about this rivalry until I started reading black American blogs. It really is a shame. People can choose to identify/associate as they choose and I am not a big fan of this idea of a black community, but does this desire to not be part of a community need to come with such antagonizing language. I just can’t anymore. This is become toxic for me.

  • Jennifer

    The last line should read: “this is becoming toxic for me.”

  • Kim

    The idea of a black community? It is not just an idea. It is a fact. If anyone is toxic, it would be someone like you who clearly has disdain for black people. No one asked you to be here. No one asked you to interject yourself into a conversation about people you clearly do not care for. You know there are other sites to visit? Right?

  • BluTopaz

    “It’s a fact that HBO did not deny. You can look it up. I think he pitched them an idea for a show about four black women and they stole the concept and made Sex and The City. I read about it not too long ago. The case was settled.”

    So even if it is true, one Black filmmaker pitching an idea means that Black women spearheaded the single woman theme in media-ok. I can go back several decades and show you how stupid that theory is, but won’t bother. You need to read and watch more movies, cuz you’re reaching.

    “And I’ll say it again…it’s not really a white woman’s problem because white women collectively ARE getting married. They may not be staying married but they are getting there and therefore are not lacking for men. That is simply what it comes down to with them. They don’t have the single market on loc.”

    That’s because there are more Whites than there are Blacks, common sense, no?

    “How can it be malicious when it’s usually BLACK WOMEN who volunteer to speak on camera during these programs? It would be one thing if black women weren’t being used in news segment about themselves but that is not the case. There are black women like Sherri Shepherd (who has a man) jumping up and volunteering for this stuff. And if you call 29-30% plenty I’m going to have to give you the side eye.”

    Please, I have been side-eyeing your cherry picking behind because you stay watching trash tv to glean your statisitics. As noted earlier, you are not very media savvy. All of my Black female friends are married, and most of the women in my family. No one asked to interview them. But what about the Black women in entertainment who are married and seem to be content–yeah let’s pretend they don’t exist so you feel good about yourself. We won’t mention Holly Robinson Peete, Angela Davis, Sam Jackson and his actress wife (can’t remember her name–they’ve been married for decades), Jennifer Hudson recently married, Viola Davis been married for a while also—but no let’s focus on Sherri Sheppard’s simple behind.

    “I agree she actually had POWER and therefore was a BIGGER threat that Michelle Obama. Yet you and the rest of the “don’t make any sense” set keep trying to say, “that Michelle Obama is the most powerful black woman we have every seen and therefore the reason for all the hate.” Whatever power Michelle has it comes from being married to Barack…meaning HE not she has some power. She is purely a symbol in the background like all other first ladies. Condi actually had a job. She had pull. I would argue that she was more powerful in her time than Michelle Obama.”

    You’re still not getting it–I’m not just talking about having a job-it’s about image and influence. Did you see Condi on magazine covers, chatting it up on the view, staying on Fox News’ minds because they’re pissed she doesn’t fit into a stereotype? Look at how pissed all those people were when she went to the UK and hit it off with the Queen–how dare she feel comfortable enough to make contact with this woman they will never meet. No one was checking Condi like that and you know it.

    “Exactly you are talking about racist-people known for living in fear–while I’m talking about common everyday white folks. They don’t see her as a threat. I imagine most of you must not associate with too many white people. White women see ASIAN women as a threat…not black women.”

    Generalizing again, are you? Which poll did you take to gather that info? I’ll humor you: so ALL White women are threatened by Asian women–would that also include all the White women I see adopting Asian children, often daughters?

    “If you say so. But don’t get mad at someone for doing something you are just as guilty of doing.”

    Guilty of doing what, having an opinion? I’m going to like Condi just because i want to be a contrarian Black person? Are White people who think she’s a war criminal “guilty” as well, or are they just exercising their free will unlike all Black people who only know how to “groupthink”, according to you?

    “If you did you research you would know this…they have a job to do and they are typically told what questions TO ASK. Please refer to Chris Brown’s last interview with Good Morning America.”

    Don’t give a ish about Chris Brown’s interview–I’m talking about the interview with Obama, and WHY Sawyer was fixated on that particular question which you want to dance around.

    “Clarence Thomas didn’t have a career in politics. He had one in LAW. Again and apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. ran for a public office. There is a difference. And yes, the white woman shot his career to hell (though I am sure there were other bumps in the road). Google him.”

    My point was, you wanted to use Ford’s marriage to a White woman as proof of mainstream America being more intolerant of ir marriage than a BM married to someone like Michelle. I brought up Thomas because a Supreme court justice is a very high profile spot–if White folks were so upset about him being married to one of them, he could not have gotten very far.

    “I’ve heard this from BLACK PEOPLE too. I’ve heard black people call her unattractive. So, it’s not just the white folks doing this.”

    Please, you know damn good and well you haven’t heard the same level of hatred from Black people that you have seen from many in the White media regarding this woman. Seriously–you must either read bossip.com all day or live around some ugly, bitter Black people and you have internalized all that.

    “I’m just honest. With a 70% out of wedlock rate it’s true black women aren’t doing anything to combat the stereotype. Keep living in denial. It would be different if that number were 10% but no over half of black children are born out of wedlock and a great deal of black women have their children by more than ONE man. It’s not about self-respect. These women don’t represent me so no self-respect is lost. It’s about reality. The welfare queen stereotype has largely stuck because black women have done NOTHING as a collective to combat it. You keep pointing to yourself and your friends….you are not the only black women out here. Open your eyes.”

    My eyes have been open, which is why I can look around me (and not just what I Google) and be filled with so much anger and hatred. From that other thread I thought it was only Black men you hate, sounds like you hate yourself as well, poor thing.

    “Try using logic and not resorting to personal attacks because you don’t like my thoughts. I never said I was the only individual using anything.”

    The only thing you are using is Google–you really need to get out more and meet actual people, not numbers and statistics.

    You want to believe all women who look like you are falling into an abyss, instead of actually making connections with happy, successful Black women who don’t fall into any narrow descriptions of what White people tell you to be. And when I say successful I don’t necessarily mean college educated, just women who are enjoying their lives and being regular people-ish, you like Google so much—look up other Black women blogs besides this one and you’ll see plenty communities of diverse women.

    But if you want to stay sour and bitter, that’s on you.

  • Jennifer

    @ Kim: You’ve read this thread and it is my comments you have a problem with? Because I don’t believe in the idea of a black community? I think the term black community robs black people of their individuality. It masks the variety of experiences of black people are have. There is no one community for black people, there is a variety of different communities for different interest.

    The black people at the church I attend live very different lives than the black people in public housing less than half a mile away. That these two groups are part of the same community dealing with the same issues is ridiculous.

  • BluTopaz

    this thread is too long!!-lol–ABOVE MEANT FOR JUSTSAYIN

  • JustSaying…

    You said, “So even if it is true, one Black filmmaker pitching an idea means that Black women spearheaded the single woman theme in media-ok. I can go back several decades and show you how stupid that theory is, but won’t bother. You need to read and watch more movies, cuz you’re reaching.”

    In a way they did. There will always be dating/relationship media especially now with internet, but black women have helped pioneer the MODERN (key word) form of the genre. And it’s not a theory…it’s a fact. Before Sex and The City (which you pointed to…not me) there was Waiting To Exhale.

    You said, “That’s because there are more Whites than there are Blacks, common sense, no?”

    I should ask you this because YOU KEEP POINTING TO WHITE WOMEN as if they collectively share this problem…they don’t! On top of this AGAIN no one is telling black women to stick with black men so AGAIN they cannot be blamed solely for black women’s dating woes. So the “there are more whites than there are blacks” meme doesn’t hold weight because truthfully this isn’t why whites are collectively getting married and blacks collectively are not. Numbers are only a small piece of the puzzle as there are also more white women than white men. Straw man argument if I ever heard one.

    You said, “Please, I have been side-eyeing your cherry picking behind because you stay watching trash tv to glean your statisitics. As noted earlier, you are not very media savvy. All of my Black female friends are married, and most of the women in my family. No one asked to interview them. But what about the Black women in entertainment who are married and seem to be content–yeah let’s pretend they don’t exist so you feel good about yourself. We won’t mention Holly Robinson Peete, Angela Davis, Sam Jackson and his actress wife (can’t remember her name–they’ve been married for decades), Jennifer Hudson recently married, Viola Davis been married for a while also—but no let’s focus on Sherri Sheppard’s simple behind.”

    You keep pointing to EXCEPTIONS. No matter how you try to slice it 70% of black women aren’t married. I don’t know why you keep jumping around this reality pointing to your friends as if they somehow can erase this reality.

    It’s the Sherri Shepherds of the world (again she has a man) jumping up and spouting about NOT having a man. Often it’s the most successful black women complaining about this problem. That is the truth.

    You said, “You’re still not getting it–I’m not just talking about having a job-it’s about image and influence. Did you see Condi on magazine covers, chatting it up on the view, staying on Fox News’ minds because they’re pissed she doesn’t fit into a stereotype? Look at how pissed all those people were when she went to the UK and hit it off with the Queen–how dare she feel comfortable enough to make contact with this woman they will never meet. No one was checking Condi like that and you know it.”

    Quite honestly Condi probably had more pull and influence over white America than Michelle Obama simply because many of them agreed with her politics. I think you are reaching for straws again. Fox New is a known racist network so sure they are going to have something to say about damn near everything the Obamas do. They didn’t go in on Condi because they agree with her politics. It is not because they are supposedly jealous or intimidated by Michelle Obama…it’s simply because she is black and holds political views different from their own.

    Some of you chicks need to get a grip. Y’all must not know too many white people because truth be told MOST of them wouldn’t switch places with us. This idea that they feel threatened by us is ridiculous. Yeah they feel threatened by a group of people who can’t even get their nuclear family on track. Ha!

    You said, “Generalizing again, are you? Which poll did you take to gather that info? I’ll humor you: so ALL White women are threatened by Asian women–would that also include all the White women I see adopting Asian children, often daughters?”

    Truth hurts. The only race of women who are any competition right now to white womanhood are Asian woman, who white men are flocking to now. It’s the men of the race who elevate the women. White women didn’t get on that pedestal completely on their own. White men put them there. So if white men keep exiting in mass there goes white womanhood. Who are white men flocking to? Asian women and white Latino women.

    You said, “Guilty of doing what, having an opinion? I’m going to like Condi just because i want to be a contrarian Black person? Are White people who think she’s a war criminal “guilty” as well, or are they just exercising their free will unlike all Black people who only know how to “groupthink”, according to you?”

    So why can’t people then have an opinion of black women? Why must black women search for some type of conspiracy theory to justify said opinions? <—this was my point. Why does my opinion on this topic have to agree with your opinion (which you are trying to force on me simply because we share race and gender)?

    You said, "Don’t give a ish about Chris Brown’s interview–I’m talking about the interview with Obama, and WHY Sawyer was fixated on that particular question which you want to dance around."

    She was also "fixated" on Whitney Houston's drug use. She was also "fixated" on Rihanna side of the story. She gets paid to ask those questions. End of story.

    You said, "My point was, you wanted to use Ford’s marriage to a White woman as proof of mainstream America being more intolerant of ir marriage than a BM married to someone like Michelle. I brought up Thomas because a Supreme court justice is a very high profile spot–if White folks were so upset about him being married to one of them, he could not have gotten very far."

    You made another apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. RAN for public office. Clarence Thomas was SELECTED as a supreme court justice. He had to face the senate…not the public and the senate (full of public officials) cannot openly slander the man for his marriage to a white woman as the public can do for someone running for political office. There is a difference.

    You said, "Please, you know damn good and well you haven’t heard the same level of hatred from Black people that you have seen from many in the White media regarding this woman. Seriously–you must either read bossip.com all day or live around some ugly, bitter Black people and you have internalized all that."

    Actually I heard more black people refer to Michelle Obama as UGLY during Barack's campaign than any other group. That is the truth. It might not be on the same level as non-blacks now but don't act like you haven't heard the ish too. I haven't internalized anything…I'm simply pointing out what I have heard.

    You said, "My eyes have been open, which is why I can look around me (and not just what I Google) and be filled with so much anger and hatred. From that other thread I thought it was only Black men you hate, sounds like you hate yourself as well, poor thing."

    Actually I don't hate anyone. I simply refuse to blame black men and the white media for all black women's problems. There are a lot of things black women have control of but chicks like you are looking for a scapegoat to justify why black women don't take control of their plight. Unlike you I don't live in a world where black women can do no wrong. Simply because I am a black woman doesn't mean I have to walk around with those same blinders YOU CHOOSE to wear. You resort to attacks when you can't come up with any logical explanations for bullshit. GROW UP!

    You said, "The only thing you are using is Google–you really need to get out more and meet actual people, not numbers and statistics."

    So I guess that 70% of out of wedlock births stat (which they get at the time of birth) is a lie?

    I don't need Google to see that black women got issues. I can look around and see that for myself.

    You said, "You want to believe all women who look like you are falling into an abyss, instead of actually making connections with happy, successful Black women who don’t fall into any narrow descriptions of what White people tell you to be. And when I say successful I don’t necessarily mean college educated, just women who are enjoying their lives and being regular people-ish, you like Google so much—look up other Black women blogs besides this one and you’ll see plenty communities of diverse women."

    Point out to me exactly where I said ALL WOMEN, black women, are falling into an abyss. I'll wait…

    Point out to me exactly where I said there are no successful black women. Again I'll wait…

    You said, "But if you want to stay sour and bitter, that’s on you."

    I'm not one of the individuals here bitching about the white media. That would be you. Like I said, I have no problem with these issues being discussed as long as they are honest and accurate.

  • JustSaying…

    You said, “So even if it is true, one Black filmmaker pitching an idea means that Black women spearheaded the single woman theme in media-ok. I can go back several decades and show you how stupid that theory is, but won’t bother. You need to read and watch more movies, cuz you’re reaching.”

    In a way they did. There will always be dating/relationship media especially now with internet, but black women have helped pioneer the MODERN (key word) form of the genre. And it’s not a theory…it’s a fact. Before Sex and The City (which you pointed to…not me) there was Waiting To Exhale.

    You said, “That’s because there are more Whites than there are Blacks, common sense, no?”

    I should ask you this because YOU KEEP POINTING TO WHITE WOMEN as if they collectively share this problem…they don’t! On top of this AGAIN no one is telling black women to stick with black men so AGAIN they cannot be blamed solely for black women’s dating woes. So the “there are more whites than there are blacks” meme doesn’t hold weight because truthfully this isn’t why whites are collectively getting married and blacks collectively are not. Numbers are only a small piece of the puzzle as there are also more white women than white men. Straw man argument if I ever heard one.

    You said, “Please, I have been side-eyeing your cherry picking behind because you stay watching trash tv to glean your statisitics. As noted earlier, you are not very media savvy. All of my Black female friends are married, and most of the women in my family. No one asked to interview them. But what about the Black women in entertainment who are married and seem to be content–yeah let’s pretend they don’t exist so you feel good about yourself. We won’t mention Holly Robinson Peete, Angela Davis, Sam Jackson and his actress wife (can’t remember her name–they’ve been married for decades), Jennifer Hudson recently married, Viola Davis been married for a while also—but no let’s focus on Sherri Sheppard’s simple behind.”

    You keep pointing to EXCEPTIONS. No matter how you try to slice it 70% of black women aren’t married. I don’t know why you keep jumping around this reality pointing to your friends as if they somehow can erase this reality.

    It’s the Sherri Shepherds of the world (again she has a man) jumping up and spouting about NOT having a man. Often it’s the most successful black women complaining about this problem. That is the truth.

    You said, “You’re still not getting it–I’m not just talking about having a job-it’s about image and influence. Did you see Condi on magazine covers, chatting it up on the view, staying on Fox News’ minds because they’re pissed she doesn’t fit into a stereotype? Look at how pissed all those people were when she went to the UK and hit it off with the Queen–how dare she feel comfortable enough to make contact with this woman they will never meet. No one was checking Condi like that and you know it.”

    Quite honestly Condi probably had more pull and influence over white America than Michelle Obama simply because many of them agreed with her politics. I think you are reaching for straws again. Fox New is a known racist network so sure they are going to have something to say about damn near everything the Obamas do. They didn’t go in on Condi because they agree with her politics. It is not because they are supposedly jealous or intimidated by Michelle Obama…it’s simply because she is black and holds political views different from their own.

    Some of you chicks need to get a grip. Y’all must not know too many white people because truth be told MOST of them wouldn’t switch places with us. This idea that they feel threatened by us is ridiculous. Yeah they feel threatened by a group of people who can’t even get their nuclear family on track. Ha!

    Continued…

  • JustSaying…

    You said, “Generalizing again, are you? Which poll did you take to gather that info? I’ll humor you: so ALL White women are threatened by Asian women–would that also include all the White women I see adopting Asian children, often daughters?”

    Truth hurts. The only race of women who are any competition right now to white womanhood are Asian woman, who white men are flocking to now. It’s the men of the race who elevate the women. White women didn’t get on that pedestal completely on their own. White men put them there. So if white men keep exiting in mass there goes white womanhood. Who are white men flocking to? Asian women and white Latino women.

    You said, “Guilty of doing what, having an opinion? I’m going to like Condi just because i want to be a contrarian Black person? Are White people who think she’s a war criminal “guilty” as well, or are they just exercising their free will unlike all Black people who only know how to “groupthink”, according to you?”

    So why can’t people then have an opinion of black women? Why must black women search for some type of conspiracy theory to justify said opinions? <—this was my point. Why does my opinion on this topic have to agree with your opinion (which you are trying to force on me simply because we share race and gender)?

    You said, "Don’t give a ish about Chris Brown’s interview–I’m talking about the interview with Obama, and WHY Sawyer was fixated on that particular question which you want to dance around."

    She was also "fixated" on Whitney Houston's drug use. She was also "fixated" on Rihanna side of the story. She gets paid to ask those questions. End of story.

    You said, "My point was, you wanted to use Ford’s marriage to a White woman as proof of mainstream America being more intolerant of ir marriage than a BM married to someone like Michelle. I brought up Thomas because a Supreme court justice is a very high profile spot–if White folks were so upset about him being married to one of them, he could not have gotten very far."

    You made another apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. RAN for public office. Clarence Thomas was SELECTED as a supreme court justice. He had to face the senate…not the public and the senate (full of public officials) cannot openly slander the man for his marriage to a white woman as the public can do for someone running for political office. There is a difference.

    You said, "Please, you know damn good and well you haven’t heard the same level of hatred from Black people that you have seen from many in the White media regarding this woman. Seriously–you must either read bossip.com all day or live around some ugly, bitter Black people and you have internalized all that."

    Actually I heard more black people refer to Michelle Obama as UGLY during Barack's campaign than any other group. That is the truth. It might not be on the same level as non-blacks now but don't act like you haven't heard the ish too. I haven't internalized anything…I'm simply pointing out what I have heard.

    You said, "My eyes have been open, which is why I can look around me (and not just what I Google) and be filled with so much anger and hatred. From that other thread I thought it was only Black men you hate, sounds like you hate yourself as well, poor thing."

    Actually I don't hate anyone. I simply refuse to blame black men and the white media for all black women's problems. There are a lot of things black women have control of but chicks like you are looking for a scapegoat to justify why black women don't take control of their plight. Unlike you I don't live in a world where black women can do no wrong. Simply because I am a black woman doesn't mean I have to walk around with those same blinders YOU CHOOSE to wear. You resort to attacks when you can't come up with any logical explanations for bullshit. GROW UP!

    You said, "The only thing you are using is Google–you really need to get out more and meet actual people, not numbers and statistics."

    So I guess that 70% of out of wedlock births stat (which they get at the time of birth) is a lie?

    I don't need Google to see that black women got issues. I can look around and see that for myself.

    You said, "You want to believe all women who look like you are falling into an abyss, instead of actually making connections with happy, successful Black women who don’t fall into any narrow descriptions of what White people tell you to be. And when I say successful I don’t necessarily mean college educated, just women who are enjoying their lives and being regular people-ish, you like Google so much—look up other Black women blogs besides this one and you’ll see plenty communities of diverse women."

    Point out to me exactly where I said ALL WOMEN, black women, are falling into an abyss. I'll wait…

    Point out to me exactly where I said there are no successful black women. Again I'll wait…

    You said, "But if you want to stay sour and bitter, that’s on you."

    I'm not one of the individuals here bitching about the white media. That would be you. Like I said, I have no problem with these issues being discussed as long as they are honest and accurate.

  • JustSaying…

    You said, “Generalizing again, are you? Which poll did you take to gather that info? I’ll humor you: so ALL White women are threatened by Asian women–would that also include all the White women I see adopting Asian children, often daughters?”

    Truth hurts. The only race of women who are any competition right now to white womanhood are Asian woman, who white men are flocking to now. It’s the men of the race who elevate the women. White women didn’t get on that pedestal completely on their own. White men put them there. So if white men keep exiting in mass there goes white womanhood. Who are white men flocking to? Asian women and white Latino women.

    You said, “Guilty of doing what, having an opinion? I’m going to like Condi just because i want to be a contrarian Black person? Are White people who think she’s a war criminal “guilty” as well, or are they just exercising their free will unlike all Black people who only know how to “groupthink”, according to you?”

    So why can’t people then have an opinion of black women? Why must black women search for some type of conspiracy theory to justify said opinions? <—this was my point. Why does my opinion on this topic have to agree with your opinion (which you are trying to force on me simply because we share race and gender)?

    You said, "Don’t give a ish about Chris Brown’s interview–I’m talking about the interview with Obama, and WHY Sawyer was fixated on that particular question which you want to dance around."

    She was also "fixated" on Whitney Houston's drug use. She was also "fixated" on Rihanna side of the story. She gets paid to ask those questions. End of story.

    You said, "My point was, you wanted to use Ford’s marriage to a White woman as proof of mainstream America being more intolerant of ir marriage than a BM married to someone like Michelle. I brought up Thomas because a Supreme court justice is a very high profile spot–if White folks were so upset about him being married to one of them, he could not have gotten very far."

    You made another apples and oranges comparison. Harold Ford Jr. RAN for public office. Clarence Thomas was SELECTED as a supreme court justice. He had to face the senate…not the public and the senate (full of public officials) cannot openly slander the man for his marriage to a white woman as the public can do for someone running for political office. There is a difference.

    You said, "Please, you know damn good and well you haven’t heard the same level of hatred from Black people that you have seen from many in the White media regarding this woman. Seriously–you must either read bossip.com all day or live around some ugly, bitter Black people and you have internalized all that."

    Actually I heard more black people refer to Michelle Obama as UGLY during Barack's campaign than any other group. That is the truth. It might not be on the same level as non-blacks now but don't act like you haven't heard the ish too. I haven't internalized anything…I'm simply pointing out what I have heard.

    You said, "My eyes have been open, which is why I can look around me (and not just what I Google) and be filled with so much anger and hatred. From that other thread I thought it was only Black men you hate, sounds like you hate yourself as well, poor thing."

    Actually I don't hate anyone. I simply refuse to blame black men and the white media for all black women's problems. There are a lot of things black women have control of but chicks like you are looking for a scapegoat to justify why black women don't take control of their plight. Unlike you I don't live in a world where black women can do no wrong. Simply because I am a black woman doesn't mean I have to walk around with those same blinders YOU CHOOSE to wear. You resort to attacks when you can't come up with any logical explanations for bullshit. GROW UP!

    You said, "The only thing you are using is Google–you really need to get out more and meet actual people, not numbers and statistics."

    So I guess that 70% of out of wedlock births stat (which they get at the time of birth) is a lie?

    I don't need Google to see that black women got issues. I can look around and see that for myself.

    You said, "You want to believe all women who look like you are falling into an abyss, instead of actually making connections with happy, successful Black women who don’t fall into any narrow descriptions of what White people tell you to be. And when I say successful I don’t necessarily mean college educated, just women who are enjoying their lives and being regular people-ish, you like Google so much—look up other Black women blogs besides this one and you’ll see plenty communities of diverse women."

    Point out to me exactly where I said ALL WOMEN, black women, are falling into an abyss. I'll wait…

    Point out to me exactly where I said there are no successful black women. Again I'll wait…

    You said, "But if you want to stay sour and bitter, that’s on you."

    I'm not one of the individuals here complaining about the white media. That would be you. Like I said, I have no problem with these issues being discussed as long as they are honest and accurate.

  • Val

    This was a great article! I also have been noticing the lack of the appearance of black love on many TV shows as of late. There was a time when you would be so excited to see a black person on TV – now I get all crazy when I see a black couple, because it’s so rare.
    My List of Token Black Characters In Interracial Relationships: Romany Malco on “No Ordinary Family,” Tristan Wilds on “90210,” Todd Williams on “Chicago Code,” Brandon Jay McLaren on “The Killing,” and Morris Chestnut on “V”
    These are just shows that I’ve seen this year and I’m sure there are more!

  • Natasha Millikan

    Hi,

    I am a white woman. I hope that doesn’t make people want to discount what I say, but of course it colors the way I think. In this society race is made to be important enough that we do end up identifying to a large extent with our own race and so my experience is different than that of many Black women. But I hope you can respect my opinion anyway.

    These comments have made me very sad. It’s not surprising that they are coming disproportionately, if not completely, from Black women who are far better off than the majority– those who have “made it.” Those who haven’t simply don’t have access to the Internet.

    But these commenters are only defending themselves; or defending Black women in general only in that many- as shown by themselves or some demographics- are educated, etc. I think the rest of Black women– not as a community, but as a demographic which is exposed to a similar racial treatment– need to be defended as well. It is true that a large number of Blacks are poor and uneducated and perhaps? unmarried (I haven’t seem that statistic before). I am not saying all; I am not even saying more than whites. I am saying, there is a demographic which is not being defended here. Why are many Black women on welfare? Instead of explaining how that is a racist way of looking at a statistic, I wish I were seeing some defense of those Black women. The default in society– and it even looks like the default here, which is what is making me sad– is to blame those women and denigrate them (and Black men as well). But it’s for the most part not the fault of those Blacks that they are in this position. Poor people work as hard as rich people do– in fact usually harder (you try working two shifts a day at a minimum wage job and see how you like it, whatever race you are). If they have fewer jobs proportionately there is a reason. That is not inferiority– which position I almost see assumed here– it is the position a poor Black woman is born into: Impoverished families (NOT due to the fault of Blacks or any poor family), a racist society that hires Black women as a last resort, Black men who often don’t respect or treat their female counterparts well, etc. These woman are strong women and whether or not their existence is somehow more so that white women, for the very much most part it is what they were given to start with. And if they are disproportionately unmarried, it d*mn well doesn’t reflect on them, for the most part. It’s poverty, the culture of some Black men (who are also only partially to blame). I am sad to see these women undefended here.

    I am also sad to see the racism against Hispanics. I didn’t notice anyone criticizing this at all. Yes, that one a**hole was Hispanic. But that doesn’t mean a thing about most Hispanics. I say the same thing about them. Hispanic women may not have the same relation with Hispanic men as many Black women do with Black men. But the poverty and working hard are the same.

    I am in a strange situation. I was born into a (white) middle class household, with all the advantages; thus I have a good education behind me including three degrees. Then, an event over which I had no control has disabled me and now I live on something close to welfare (disability which I would lose if I were well enough to work). This is d**n humiliating for a person of any race at all. I also just spent three years in a 99% Black, poverty-stricken community which contained a very many people (more women than men) who resented my existence, and I was treated quite poorly; so much so that I was afraid to leave my apartment– not afraid of physical violence but of emotional violence. It was very hard not to let this color my perception of race. But these neighbors of mine did not choose to live in poverty. They did not choose to live in a society where the appearance of a white person often ends up leading to “gentrification,” which means poor people, disproportionately Blacks, are unwanted and forced out due to high rent. Or in a society where many Black men may respond disproportionately positively to blonde women, and other white women as well. And some individuals responded in a negative way, which does not excuse them but also does not reflect the least bit on Blacks anywhere else in the world. I hope I have been successful in not letting this experience color my impression of Blacks in general– though I admit a certain actual surprise and lifting of my heart when, in Manhattan, a Black woman on the street smiled at me.

    It is indeed racist of the media to be focussing right now on certain characteristics of a segment of Black society while ignoring both higher class Blacks and lower class whites. I’m pretty sure that’s the point of the article– that this focus has grown since the Obamas entered the White House. But I am sad not to see poor and underprivileged Black women (or people of any race) defended here; in fact even denigrated by many commenters.

    Thanks for listening. I hope I didn’t p**s anybody off.

  • Natasha Millikan

    Oh I had only read page three. There may be earlier commenters whose comments were different.

  • Tomi-chan

    You made too much sense, I might take the easy way out and call you a racist haha. Just kidding, I really do agree with most of everything you have said. You should comment more often.

  • ConshusMama

    I don’t think of it as ‘rising’ attacks, it’s that the attacks have taken a different form. Black women have been under attack since Muslim’s and Xtian’s started to attack the Goddess and take down any who worshiped her calling them “pagan”. This is just a new take on an old song.

    I think every black woman must ask herself “why”? Why is it that they’d rather have a black woman feel wretchedly about herself? What would anyone have to gain by this negative propaganda. Finding an answer to that, what ever that answer might be for her is going to be key to her building herself up after being knocked down for so long.

  • CG

    We’ve always been attacked; we will continue to be attacked. READ Dr. Joy DeGruy’s book and you’ll understand more about how we see ourselves and why we see ourselves like we do and the power we give others about defining our image and our self-worth. It’s sad….but there’s no time for weeping only time to make sure our little girls and boys grow up to know their self-worth so we can have a stronger community. We need to emphasis education and stop trying to be famous or some tired ass sports star. We need to value the brain more, we need to make our ancestors proud….A lot of these young babies out here and old ones too need to sit down and watch Eyes on the Prize and realize what sacrifices were done for us….

  • shamara26

    One thing I haven’t yet seen anyone comment on is the way intelligent, educated, SUCCESSFUL Black women demean other intelligent, educated, and successful Black women. I saw this a lot at the last job, but also outside of the office, too. Why do we do this? Are we competing with each other, knowing that we have less of a chance of being hired, promoted, dated, selected, accepted, etc? I don’t know if this behavior is simply a product of the area (Dallas, Texas), or an outward manifestation of the mores our educated Black Americans grew up with.

    I agree that we need to let go of the (uneducated, ignorant, uncaring) toxic community, but we need to support each other, too. I’m not saying that we should all join hands and unite as sisters (let’s spare each other the false sense of camaraderie, shall we?), but only that we should not judge each other as harshly as we think others judge us.

  • Natasha Millikan

    Thank you, Tomi-chen. I really appreciate the compliment. This is my first visit to the site, through a feminist page on Facebook (can’t remember which one). I should indeed come back.

    I just saw an article about the guy who wrote the “Black women are unattractive” article. he is probably going to lose his job.

    http://www.bvblackspin.com/2011/05/20/racist-satoshi-kanazawa-may-lose-job/

    Note he is Asian… I have to say, Asian MEN are the least attractive to me of any man and to most women I know. People in glass houses… But you will never see an article about that.

  • Natasha Millikan

    oops (argh!) it refers to a clutch article!

  • http://cocoafly.com Cocoa Fly

    Great post but black women have been attacked long before Mrs. Obama became First Lady. We have been degraded by the people within our community and outside of our community. Hurston speaks of this in her novels. Black women need to unite and call out misogyny when BOTH non-black men and black men disrespect us. Read just about anything by bell hooks, Killing the Black Body: Race, Reproduction, and the Meaning of Liberty by Dorothy Roberts and Aren’t I a Woman by Deborah White.

  • Nneoma

    I know I am biting the troll bait here and perhaps stating the obvious to the majority of us who perchance, passed the eighth grade…but…

    Any modern-day argument that contains reference to Herrnstein and Murray’s “The Bell Curve,” is laughable…at best. Seriously, Love, where have you been? Who publicly references that text anymore? Let’s chalk it up to a slip of the tongue, or the unfortunate circumstance of not having picked up a book or entered a classroom since the 90s…I don’t know, a really long coma, a ten-year stint tucked away in the recesses of the Amazon…something. If these, or similar circumstances, we forgive you. But just don’t go out there, beyond the merciful confines of internet anonymity, and mention those names in public, unless your starting off with, “So a preacher, a rabbi and Herrnstein were at a bar one day…”

  • Jess

    @BluTopaz:
    “And you forgot one thing about Condoleeza: yes, she was considered the most powerful Black woman in the world. Very powerful and uber educated, and as long as she stays unattached to a powerful man she does not represent the same threat to the image of White womanhood that Michelle does; a devoted wife and mother married to the most powerful man on earth and in a patriarchal society that still trumps a woman with brass balls. And Michelle also happened to be a very successful businesswoman so they can’t even call her a golddigger. And don’t forget: Condoleeza polarizes a lot of people because of her politics, the only people Michelle are pissing off are crazy White nutjobs and for what reason? One guess. Even those who are not on the fringe can’t figure it out: I watched an interview with then Senator Obama and Diane Sawyer, and she kept asking him to elaborate on a very brief passage in one of his books about a romantic relationship he had with a White woman eons ago in college. He answered her question and moved on, but she was reaaaalllly interested to know if he could have actually chosen her to be his life partner. The fact that a very powerful Black man is not married to a White woman has driven a lot of these people insane, because it does not fit into any neat boxes they like to put us in. Condi? Well it’s ok that she is super smart and GWB’s water carrier-no biggie. Did you see any of the racist venom directed towards her by the GOP that we see thrown at Michelle? Wonder why, and no it’s not because she’s a Democrat. ”

    GREAT POINT ABOUT CONDI VS. MICHELLE OBAMA. GREAT POINT. I NEVER EVEN THOUGHT OF THAT, BUT YOU ARE SOOO RIGHT.

  • aiych

    LOL why are you all even entertaining Davis? It’s clearly a troll, and your attempts to reason with it are only exacerbating the situation.

    Davis may not even be hispanic or a male since people frequently lie on the internet. I have seen trolls and “posers” be outed on comment boards by their IP addresses. It’s funny as hell and they’re usually not who/what they claim to be. The last one I saw was a black male pretending to be a Neo-Nazi. He then switched his username and pretended to be a female. He was outed both times when the administrator revealed his name and email address. Otherwise his charade would’ve been convincing.

    And if Davis is a hispanic male, so what? Let him have his crazy way of thinking and stop wasting your time arguing with him. He should be spending more time taking care of his two kids if he actually is a father like he says.

  • Dawn

    @Natasha Millikan, although some is questionable (hidden insults), I agree with most of what you say, but the topic is about the rising attacks against black women. Yes, I am also guilty from straying away from the topic too.
    The bottom line, black women have been below the bottom of the totem pole since day one. I’m sorry to sound cliche’, broke record… or whatever, but you will never know what it’s like to be a black woman. Statistics my ass, statistics will always show us coming out looking bad. Just because we have one black women out of every 100 who has not experience the negativity, then statistics show we are just complainers. But when statistics show the negative side of things. i.e., we have multiple baby daddies, then that’s when statistics show it’s the majority of black women. We have never been considered and individual, and I’m straying off topic again but another example: When ONE black person gets fired and goes back and shoots up his place of employment… then statistics show “THEY are animals, uneducated, no father figures…blah blah blah.” When One white man gets fired, shoots up his place of employment then you hear, “He came from a loving home, raised by both parents but HE was a disturbed INDIVIDUAL…blah blah blah.” We can’t even complain anymore without being accused of playing the race card… bye the way — hush tactic. We are going to continue to complain about every damn thing we think is not fare… The day we stop complaining is the day when this topic, and topics of this nature is no longer a damn topic.
    So when we complain about this topic, we are not speaking of all black women, but a majority. Yes, we have some foul living black women, and it is very embarrassing… shamefully embarrassing.. and they know who they are. But that is what the media will forever show, is the embarrassing part of us. I like to consider myself an unbiased person, but I’m sorry…. back to the black man! From what I see, from what I witness walking around in every day life; not what I read or hear from others, but from my experiences and yes I’m just ONE person, but majority or maybe even half of the black men do not support us, and lift us up in the way we need to be… They don’t! One thing I can agree on with what statistics show — And what I also see on a daily basis (sorry my black peeps) is that white men are there for their ladies and there for their children…. Our black men are lacking in that department…. however, I grew up with both my parents, and they just celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary…. but I digress!!! But I am sick and tired of white folks thinking they know what we go through, and assuming we are treated just as fare as them… because we are not. Again if we were, this topic would not exist.

  • Jinx Moneypenny

    It is more important than EVER for Black women to own themselves.

    Own self.
    Own heart.
    Own mind.
    Own body.

    THINK. So many people don’t teach their daughters to think, and they grow up and become some of the most intolerable human beings on Earth, because they don’t THINK and never have.

    You can be free of some of these attacks. Own your SELF. I can’t stress that enough.

    Don’t let your FAMILY own you.
    Don’t let your PARTNER own you.
    Don’t let your FRIENDS own you.

    And pass it on.

  • fya

    AWESOME

  • Oli

    I love this article. Thank you for it. I hope we all live by it.

  • jace

    “not all Blacks were raised in the ‘hood” Michelle was raised on the south side of Chicago.

    Is the “new” black woman’s movement a class divisive movement? Is how we are seen by others more important than uplifting and helping other black women create our own?

  • Nasya

    Love it :)

  • Mrenee

    Great timing with this article because I am tired of the put downs, but I can’t say I blame the media totally. There are many of our black women who are living the stereotypes and its easy for the media to focus on that.

    Like why do I have to get on the subway and have a young black mother walk through the car yelling that she needs money from anyone willing to give her a handout because she has 2 kids at home and is 3 months pregnant with the third?? I saw the look of the passengers on the train, with disgust, I was disgusted myself. I wanted to say, here is $20 to go buy a pack of condoms so this doesn’t happen again.

    I have 3 grown children by one man, my ex-husband. Why is it when I tell people I have 3 children, they (black men mostly) ask “all by the same father?” (WTF) and then think its abnormal that I was married before having my children in wedlock?!

    Then I have to see the news today of a bunch of black teens (girls included) running through a Dunkin Donuts in Manhattan stealing food, throwing chairs and just causing plain chaos for no apparent reason? Where did these kids parents go wrong? Yes, the parents, cause I know my children (black children) would never do such a thing. So the stereotypes continue, and we’ll have a whole new generation for the media to pick apart.

    I understand that we didn’t all grown up the same or have the same opportunities, but its time for black women to pick their ownselves up. I can’t take responsibility for every black women that isn’t trying to help herself. Our ancestors struggled to get where we are today, and we are showing no respect for their hard work.

    Everyday I try my hardest to defunct the stereotypes, but I’m only one person my sisters.

  • BluTopaz

    “In a way they did. There will always be dating/relationship media especially now with internet, but black women have helped pioneer the MODERN (key word) form of the genre. And it’s not a theory…it’s a fact. Before Sex and The City (which you pointed to…not me) there was Waiting To Exhale.”

    And several decades before WTE there was the quintessential SINGLE career woman, Mary Tyler Moore. Keep reaching, maybe your arms will grow. And the fact you are bringing up a movie, based on a fiction novel, as “proof” that Black women are ;running to the media’ shows how groundless your opinions are.

    And for something more “modern”: “He’s Just Not That Into You”–I haven’t read anyone claim that as the single White woman’s dating manifesto and as much as you want to believe it, not all White women are getting married and having kids and many of them know that as well. But according to much of the media (and you), White women are individuals who can think for themselves! Not a group that can be defined by one demographic!

    How pitiful for you.

    ” Numbers are only a small piece of the puzzle as there are also more white women than white men. Straw man argument if I ever heard one.

    Not a straw man argument, looking at the BIG picture which you have a problem doing because it does not back up your foolishness.

    You keep pointing to EXCEPTIONS. No matter how you try to slice it 70% of black women aren’t married. I don’t know why you keep jumping around this reality pointing to your friends as if they somehow can erase this reality.

    I never said erasing a reality. This entire post was about how Black women are constantly targeted as unlovable, not marriage material, etc and mine (and any other Black women who doesn’t hate herself) countered that with the question of why happy Black women are shown in the media to balance this imagery. It’s the same as Black people who complain about Terry Perry–sure there are Black people who watch his films but there are many who don’t and would like to see their interests and lifestyles on the screen.

    PLUS there are poor and uneducated White women who are choosing not to marry. Since you are having difficulty obtaining info that doesn’t sound like a Fox soundbyte I’ll help you out.

    From the below link:

    “And this begs the question: are we seeing the same thing for poor and even working class white women? Is marriage becoming an unattainable dream? As Hummer and Hamilton in the same issue of Future of Children put it, “Unmarried black women today are having fewer births than they did in 1970, while unmarried white women are having more.”

    http://mybarbararay.com/2010/10/08/marriage-rates-fall-for-less-educated-white-women-is-it-time-for-a-moynihan-report-for-the-white-family/

    Funny I haven’t heard this meme all over. And as for educated Black women having difficulty finding husbands, there are all kinds of factors there that have been discuused ad nauseum. Many BW prefer Black men and that’s fine, but their options may be limited in their circles so they remain single. Then you’ll get morons like Steve Harvey telling professional women they should get with the janitor and his grandpa or the recently paroled Pookie down the street–instead of writing a book telling men to get their ish together. THIS is the mess I am talking about, all your comments aside for a moment. Making grown women of any color feel insecure about themselves has always been profitable, and now has exploded with “relationship experts” like three time divorced Harvey selling books to Black women who are stupid enough to settle for the negativity. I will be damn if i let someone tell me i don’t deserve better than feeling grateful for having a man, just because I’m a Black woman.

    Then here you come, talking about well BLACK WOMEN blah, blah and Black women don’t do shit–girl –you must be constantly looking in the mirror and live in a rough place if you want to believe every Black women you see lives down to this hype.

    “It’s the Sherri Shepherds of the world (again she has a man) jumping up and spouting about NOT having a man. Often it’s the most successful black women complaining about this problem. That is the truth.”

    The truth according to JS–which on her what, 10th post now? She still has not substantiated. Next.

    “Quite honestly Condi probably had more pull and influence over white America than Michelle Obama simply because many of them agreed with her politics. I think you are reaching for straws again. Fox New is a known racist network so sure they are going to have something to say about damn near everything the Obamas do. They didn’t go in on Condi because they agree with her politics. It is not because they are supposedly jealous or intimidated by Michelle Obama…it’s simply because she is black and holds political views different from their own.”

    Compare the venom thrown towards Michelle with the anti-Hillary comments and see if there is anything about Hil that’s worse than comments about her pantsuits and sticking up for her husband. Won’t hold my breath.

    And wow, you are a genius! Of course the attacks on Michelle are because she’s Black! And guess what else-Michelle hasn’t stated any political views for those crackers to disagree with, that’s not her job as FLOTUS and she didn’t do it when campaigning either. She has been roasted for everything from a to z, and it’s not just Fox news doing it. If you live in NYC, check out some of the daily news sites all pissed off because the Obamas are in the UK now, and read some of the nuggets referring to Michelle as all kinds of crap I won’t repeat. These people are filled with ugliness, and seeing this woman in the position that she’s in is making them froth at the mouth even when she is making the most mundance comments about telling kids to eat healthy, planting a freaking rose bush at the WH–they can’t stand seeing her there and I LOVE it!

    And getting back to this article: sure ugly stuff about Black women have been stated since forever, but this systematic, methodical approach is something recent that has occurred in the past three years.

    “Some of you chicks need to get a grip. Y’all must not know too many white people because truth be told MOST of them wouldn’t switch places with us. This idea that they feel threatened by us is ridiculous. Yeah they feel threatened by a group of people who can’t even get their nuclear family on track. Ha!”

    When you’re not being a water carrier, ever ask yourself why so many White people spend so much time generalizing all Black people into neat boxes? One is to brainwash. If an oppressor can make a group of people believe ALL the ugliness said about them, then their job is partially done. This appears to have worked very well with you, and no amount of education or “research” on wikipedia and google erases that.

    And if you think many White people don’t feel a little heated when they see educated Black women AND men, maybe you can explain why Blacks and Whites with the same level of education are having different experiences in this recession:

    http://newsone.com/nation/news-one-staff/among-college-educated-african-americans-hardest-hit-by-unemployment/

    Hear that from the Economic Policy Institute? It’s not talking about babymamas/crackaddicts/exconvicts so you might not understand so I’ll post an excerpt:

    “The March 2009 unemployment rate for college-educated blacks was 7.2%—almost twice as high as the white rate—and up 4.5 percentage points from March 2007, before the start of the current recession…If Black workers who are the most prepared to compete and work in the new economy can’t find jobs, that’s something that we as a country have to take seriously.”

    And it’s not because Black grads are partying or majoring in different majors than their White counterparts, in case that was your comeback:

    http://thedailyvoice.com/voice/2009/05/growing-unemployment-rate-disp-001883.php

    Now if you want to come back and explain why college educated Black people who make up a smaller percentage than college educated Whites, total ALMOST TWICE the unemployed rate–be my guest. Til then stfu.

    “Truth hurts. The only race of women who are any competition right now to white womanhood are Asian woman, who white men are flocking to now. It’s the men of the race who elevate the women. White women didn’t get on that pedestal completely on their own. White men put them there. So if white men keep exiting in mass there goes white womanhood. Who are white men flocking to? Asian women and white Latino women.”

    I’ll ask you again–where is this survey that states White women are feeling threatened by Asian or white Latinas? Did you hear it on The View?-lol

    “So why can’t people then have an opinion of black women? Why must black women search for some type of conspiracy theory to justify said opinions? <—this was my point. Why does my opinion on this topic have to agree with your opinion (which you are trying to force on me simply because we share race and gender)? "

    I have plenty opinions about a lot of people–I don't make it my business to put them under a microscope at every turn and label them all as one particular thing cuz guess what–I'm not checking for other people that hard. There are a lot of truths in what White people do as well, ever ask yourself why they don't investigate racism in the workplace, racial profiling by the police nationwide, this current trend of White people who blame imaginary minorities for crimes they committed themselves? Why doesn't CNN do a special on White America?

    But no, the economy and national security of the country really depends on what Black women did last week, and whether or not we are dating. Who knew we had this much power, did you know?!

    And I'm not trying to force anything on you in solidarity because your opinion of yourself means nothing to me. But if you come into a thread talking about 'well Black women aren't doing anything to dispel blah blah' best believe my no-unwed kid having, never been on welfare/food stamps grad school educated self is going to take issue with THAT ish. You could be Rush Limpboobs for all i know and care.

    "She was also "fixated" on Whitney Houston's drug use. She was also "fixated" on Rihanna side of the story. She gets paid to ask those questions. End of story."

    Now explain to me why Obama's brief fling with a White woman in college two decades ago is as salacious as Whitney and Rihanna's drama. Actually, to Sawyer and many other White people, that IS a juicy tidbit. Which is my point. Now THAT'S the end of that story.

    "Actually I heard more black people refer to Michelle Obama as UGLY during Barack's campaign than any other group. That is the truth. It might not be on the same level as non-blacks now but don't act like you haven't heard the ish too. I haven't internalized anything…I'm simply pointing out what I have heard. "

    Yep, Black people made just as many remarks you "heard" and on the same level–just like Ebony, Essence, Jet n'em printed a photo of Michelle in militant gear and an afro, or when BET called her babymama on the air…

    Did you "hear" any Black POLITICIANS referring to Michelle in this manner?
    http://www.politicsdaily.com/2009/06/15/south-carolina-republican-compares-michelle-obama-to-escaped-gor/

    The fact that you want to equate Black people you "heard" call Michelle "ugly" with hideous, racial comments about this lady says a lot about you.

    "Actually I don't hate anyone. I simply refuse to blame black men and the white media for all black women's problems. There are a lot of things black women have control of but chicks like you are looking for a scapegoat to justify why black women don't take control of their plight. Unlike you I don't live in a world where black women can do no wrong. Simply because I am a black woman doesn't mean I have to walk around with those same blinders YOU CHOOSE to wear. You resort to attacks when you can't come up with any logical explanations for bullshit. GROW UP!"

    What attacks? And where did I say Black men or the media are to blame for Black women's choices? You don't have to Google this so it should be relatively easy–go back and point out where I said Black men or the media are to blame for Black women's choices? Sounds like this is an argument you have been having in your mind, and want to use it.

    "I don't need Google to see that black women got issues. I can look around and see that for myself. "

    Once again, you need to move out of your neighborhood if all you see is misery around you.

    Point out to me exactly where I said ALL WOMEN, black women, are falling into an abyss. I'll wait…

    Point out to me exactly where I said there are no successful black women. Again I'll wait…

    No problem–simply your comment above: "Black women got issues" . And your history on this site: nowhere in this thread (or anywhere else you have posted on Clutch that I have seen) have you shown any awareness of Black women who don't fit into a stereotype. Simple as that, and you get angry when you are challenged.

    "I'm not one of the individuals here bitching about the white media. That would be you. Like I said, I have no problem with these issues being discussed as long as they are honest and accurate."

    And it's telling you have absolutely no interest in seeing any balance in the media of how Black women are represented.

  • dawn

    Thank you so much for this article! I totally agree, I was just saying the same thing to one of my suitemates who is white (I go to a private baptist universty in texas) and she thought I was being dramatic. I would go futher and say not only are they trying to degrade black women they are trying to divide us as well. I’m not a fan of rap music but I occasionally listen to it when I’m with friends, every song I hear is talking about how they need a yellow chick or redbone. now I know this isn’t new but I promise every single rap song out now has some kind of refrence to a light skinned girl I remember thinking there must be some kind of agenda. Light, dark, purple, albino we are all black women and we are beautiful. We shouldn’t allow anyone to tell us any different. Screw the media

  • Maurice

    @Roberta: So true and thank you. A must read article for everyone.

  • LaBimmer

    Sounds to me as though the Real Black Women of America has everybody running scared! Its really too bad that this race issue consumes America the way it does. I wonder if racist thinking helps feed the poor, educate kids, keeps international policies in tack or help to make the world run! Just something that makes me think, I must be all that and “a bag of chips”!

  • BluTopaz

    “In a way they did. There will always be dating/relationship media especially now with internet, but black women have helped pioneer the MODERN (key word) form of the genre. And it’s not a theory…it’s a fact. Before Sex and The City (which you pointed to…not me) there was Waiting To Exhale.”

    And several decades before WTE there was the quintessential SINGLE career woman, Mary Tyler Moore. Keep reaching, maybe your arms will grow. And the fact you are bringing up a movie, based on a fiction novel, as “proof” that Black women are ;running to the media’ shows how groundless your opinions are.

    And for something more “modern”: “He’s Just Not That Into You”–I haven’t read anyone claim that as the single White woman’s dating manifesto and as much as you want to believe it, not all White women are getting married and having kids and many of them know that as well. But according to much of the media (and you), White women are individuals who can think for themselves! Not a group that can be defined by one demographic!

    How pitiful for you.

    ” Numbers are only a small piece of the puzzle as there are also more white women than white men. Straw man argument if I ever heard one.

    Not a straw man argument, looking at the BIG picture which you have a problem doing because it does not back up your foolishness.

    You keep pointing to EXCEPTIONS. No matter how you try to slice it 70% of black women aren’t married. I don’t know why you keep jumping around this reality pointing to your friends as if they somehow can erase this reality.

    I never said erasing a reality. This entire post was about how Black women are constantly targeted as unlovable, not marriage material, etc and mine (and any other Black women who doesn’t hate herself) countered that with the question of why happy Black women are shown in the media to balance this imagery. It’s the same as Black people who complain about Terry Perry–sure there are Black people who watch his films but there are many who don’t and would like to see their interests and lifestyles on the screen.

    PLUS there are poor and uneducated White women who are choosing not to marry. Since you are having difficulty obtaining info that doesn’t sound like a Fox soundbyte I’ll help you out.

    From the below link:

    “And this begs the question: are we seeing the same thing for poor and even working class white women? Is marriage becoming an unattainable dream? As Hummer and Hamilton in the same issue of Future of Children put it, “Unmarried black women today are having fewer births than they did in 1970, while unmarried white women are having more.”

    http://mybarbararay.com/2010/10/08/marriage-rates-fall-for-less-educated-white-women-is-it-time-for-a-moynihan-report-for-the-white-family/

    Funny I haven’t heard this meme all over. And as for educated Black women having difficulty finding husbands, there are all kinds of factors there that have been discuused ad nauseum. Many BW prefer Black men and that’s fine, but their options may be limited in their circles so they remain single. Then you’ll get morons like Steve Harvey telling professional women they should get with the janitor and his grandpa or the recently paroled Pookie down the street–instead of writing a book telling men to get their ish together. THIS is the mess I am talking about, all your comments aside for a moment. Making grown women of any color feel insecure about themselves has always been profitable, and now has exploded with “relationship experts” like three time divorced Harvey selling books to Black women who are stupid enough to settle for the negativity. I will be damn if i let someone tell me i don’t deserve better than feeling grateful for having a man, just because I’m a Black woman.

    Then here you come, talking about well BLACK WOMEN blah, blah and Black women don’t do shit–girl –you must be constantly looking in the mirror and live in a rough place if you want to believe every Black women you see lives down to this hype.

    “It’s the Sherri Shepherds of the world (again she has a man) jumping up and spouting about NOT having a man. Often it’s the most successful black women complaining about this problem. That is the truth.”

    The truth according to JS–which on her what, 10th post now? She still has not substantiated. Next.

    “Quite honestly Condi probably had more pull and influence over white America than Michelle Obama simply because many of them agreed with her politics. I think you are reaching for straws again. Fox New is a known racist network so sure they are going to have something to say about damn near everything the Obamas do. They didn’t go in on Condi because they agree with her politics. It is not because they are supposedly jealous or intimidated by Michelle Obama…it’s simply because she is black and holds political views different from their own.”

    Compare the venom thrown towards Michelle with the anti-Hillary comments and see if there is anything about Hil that’s worse than comments about her pantsuits and sticking up for her husband. Won’t hold my breath.

    And wow, you are a genius! Of course the attacks on Michelle are because she’s Black! And guess what else-Michelle hasn’t stated any political views for those crackers to disagree with, that’s not her job as FLOTUS and she didn’t do it when campaigning either. She has been roasted for everything from a to z, and it’s not just Fox news doing it. If you live in NYC, check out some of the daily news sites all pissed off because the Obamas are in the UK now, and read some of the nuggets referring to Michelle as all kinds of crap I won’t repeat. These people are filled with ugliness, and seeing this woman in the position that she’s in is making them froth at the mouth even when she is making the most mundance comments about telling kids to eat healthy, planting a freaking rose bush at the WH–they can’t stand seeing her there and I LOVE it!

    And getting back to this article: sure ugly stuff about Black women have been stated since forever, but this systematic, methodical approach is something recent that has occurred in the past three years.

    “Some of you chicks need to get a grip. Y’all must not know too many white people because truth be told MOST of them wouldn’t switch places with us. This idea that they feel threatened by us is ridiculous. Yeah they feel threatened by a group of people who can’t even get their nuclear family on track. Ha!”

    When you’re not being a water carrier, ever ask yourself why so many White people spend so much time generalizing all Black people into neat boxes? One is to brainwash. If an oppressor can make a group of people believe ALL the ugliness said about them, then their job is partially done. This appears to have worked very well with you, and no amount of education or “research” on wikipedia and google erases that.

    And if you think many White people don’t feel a little heated when they see educated Black women AND men, maybe you can explain why Blacks and Whites with the same level of education are having different experiences in this recession:

    http://newsone.com/nation/news-one-staff/among-college-educated-african-americans-hardest-hit-by-unemployment/

    Hear that from the Economic Policy Institute? It’s not talking about babymamas/crackaddicts/exconvicts so you might not understand so I’ll post an excerpt:

    “The March 2009 unemployment rate for college-educated blacks was 7.2%—almost twice as high as the white rate—and up 4.5 percentage points from March 2007, before the start of the current recession…If Black workers who are the most prepared to compete and work in the new economy can’t find jobs, that’s something that we as a country have to take seriously.”

    And it’s not because Black grads are partying or majoring in different majors than their White counterparts, in case that was your comeback:

    http://thedailyvoice.com/voice/2009/05/growing-unemployment-rate-disp-001883.php

    Now if you want to come back and explain why college educated Black people who make up a smaller percentage than college educated Whites, total ALMOST TWICE the unemployed rate–be my guest.

    “Truth hurts. The only race of women who are any competition right now to white womanhood are Asian woman, who white men are flocking to now. It’s the men of the race who elevate the women. White women didn’t get on that pedestal completely on their own. White men put them there. So if white men keep exiting in mass there goes white womanhood. Who are white men flocking to? Asian women and white Latino women.”

    I’ll ask you again–where is this survey that states White women are feeling threatened by Asian or white Latinas? Did you hear it on The View?-lol

    “So why can’t people then have an opinion of black women? Why must black women search for some type of conspiracy theory to justify said opinions? <—this was my point. Why does my opinion on this topic have to agree with your opinion (which you are trying to force on me simply because we share race and gender)? "

    I have plenty opinions about a lot of people–I don't make it my business to put them under a microscope at every turn and label them all as one particular thing cuz guess what–I'm not checking for other people that hard. There are a lot of truths in what White people do as well, ever ask yourself why they don't investigate racism in the workplace, racial profiling by the police nationwide, this current trend of White people who blame imaginary minorities for crimes they committed themselves? Why doesn't CNN do a special on White America?

    But no, the economy and national security of the country really depends on what Black women did last week, and whether or not we are dating. Who knew we had this much power, did you know?!

    And I'm not trying to force anything on you in solidarity because your opinion of yourself means nothing to me. But if you come into a thread talking about 'well Black women aren't doing anything to dispel blah blah' best believe my no-unwed kid having, never been on welfare/food stamps grad school educated self is going to take issue with THAT ish. You could be Rush Limpboobs for all i know and care.

    "She was also "fixated" on Whitney Houston's drug use. She was also "fixated" on Rihanna side of the story. She gets paid to ask those questions. End of story."

    Now explain to me why Obama's brief fling with a White woman in college two decades ago is as salacious as Whitney and Rihanna's drama. Actually, to Sawyer and many other White people, that IS a juicy tidbit. Which is my point. Now THAT'S the end of that story.

    "Actually I heard more black people refer to Michelle Obama as UGLY during Barack's campaign than any other group. That is the truth. It might not be on the same level as non-blacks now but don't act like you haven't heard the ish too. I haven't internalized anything…I'm simply pointing out what I have heard. "

    Yep, Black people made just as many remarks you "heard" and on the same level–just like Ebony, Essence, Jet n'em printed a photo of Michelle in militant gear and an afro, or when BET called her babymama on the air…

    Did you "hear" any Black POLITICIANS referring to Michelle in this manner?
    http://www.politicsdaily.com/2009/06/15/south-carolina-republican-compares-michelle-obama-to-escaped-gor/

    The fact that you want to equate Black people you "heard" call Michelle "ugly" with hideous, racial comments about this lady says a lot about you.

    "Actually I don't hate anyone. I simply refuse to blame black men and the white media for all black women's problems. There are a lot of things black women have control of but chicks like you are looking for a scapegoat to justify why black women don't take control of their plight. Unlike you I don't live in a world where black women can do no wrong. Simply because I am a black woman doesn't mean I have to walk around with those same blinders YOU CHOOSE to wear. You resort to attacks when you can't come up with any logical explanations for bullshit. GROW UP!"

    What attacks? And where did I say Black men or the media are to blame for Black women's choices? You don't have to Google this so it should be relatively easy–go back and point out where I said Black men or the media are to blame for Black women's choices? Sounds like this is an argument you have been having in your mind, and want to use it.

    "I don't need Google to see that black women got issues. I can look around and see that for myself. "

    Once again, you need to move out of your neighborhood if all you see is misery around you.

    Point out to me exactly where I said ALL WOMEN, black women, are falling into an abyss. I'll wait…

    Point out to me exactly where I said there are no successful black women. Again I'll wait…

    No problem–simply your comment above: "Black women got issues" . And your history on this site: nowhere in this thread (or anywhere else you have posted on Clutch that I have seen) have you shown any awareness of Black women who don't fit into a stereotype. Simple as that, and you get angry when you are challenged.

    "I'm not one of the individuals here bitching about the white media. That would be you. Like I said, I have no problem with these issues being discussed as long as they are honest and accurate."

    And it's telling you have absolutely no interest in seeing any balance in the media of how Black women are represented.

  • Yemaya

    “Our ancestors struggled to get where we are today, and we are showing no respect for their hard work.”

    Couldn’t have said it better myself, Mrenee.

  • bob

    I do not blame you for anything. The fault lies with lazy white Southerners in the 17th and 18th centuries who wouldn’t work to pick their own cotton, and searched for alternative labor sources.The resulting disaster is a textbook example of the Law of Unintended Consequences. Had you been left alone in your native land where you served well your natural role as a vital link in natures food chain, America would be a RADICALLY different, far better place today.

  • 4real

    I agree with about 85% of this article. Our people are just as guilty of these attacks as well and is because weve been conditioned by the medias dismay for black women. I wouldn’t single out Fox news but all mainstream media outlets. Though I’ve never heard such attacks on Fox news regarding First Lady accept disagreements theres a difference.
    Black women in front of the camera in entertainment have to take a stand. They have to decide not to demean themselves in music videos. Stay away from reality tv which is ALWAYS looking for the most loud, uncouth, ignorant black a woman to cast. ( Eg: NeNe leakes) She voulunteered so don’t blame Trump. We have the power to be the change we wanna see and it starts with black people uniting to do that!!

  • http://euphorialuv.wordpress.com/ Nikki @ Euphoria Luv

    Thank you, thank you, a million times thank you for writing about something that I’ve been saying for years! There is a determined purpose to keep the images and self esteem of black women as negative and low as they can.

    While it’s tiring to have to deal with everything and in so many ways we can’t give up. We must support and continue to up lift each other.

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  • TRE

    Wow, I really like this statement, and believe it to be true….Our children as well as some adults, really need to educate themselves and start to open up more of their own businesses and gain professional careers, or else the caucasians will always try to take advantage of us…

  • TRE

    This is so true, I have witnessed this at my job too many times, and it really makes the once intelligent one that is doing all the demeaning, now look like an idiot, and not so intelligent..Not too mention people begin to shun that person..

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  • I’mjustaBLKamerican

    With every stereotype there is some truth. There is no sense in pointing the blame others based on a few choice examples. It’s the same tactic that most American racist use to try and add support to their cliche’ beliefs. But I suppose that your just as racist and stereotypical as well…hmmm?

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  • Jack Mississippi

    I agree with Nikki There is a determined purpose to keep the images and self esteem of black women as negative and low as they can. This is true in the Federal Government workplace. Black female managers are attacked from every angle. The Black male Union AFGE President at the VAMC in Jackson makes it his lifes mission to degrade and bully African American female managers. His rants and bullying is protected under master agreements. Sistas in supervisory or executive roles don’t stand a chance in Jackson MS.

    We need your help to continue the fight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • jackie

    Black Female Manager’s Right To Dignity At Work Under Fire in Jackson Mississippi

    My career in the Federal Government as an African American female has been tumultuous. The hatred and abuse experienced at the hand of the African American male AFGE 589 President apparently for no other reason than being born Black and female made me stronger. His actions targets and undermines black female manager’s right to dignity at work. Thanks to great senior leadership Black women have made huge professional strides at a Jackson Federal Government health care administration. These strides have not come without sacrifice of loss of dignity and self respect.

    For a while I was in a lost space. Constant bullying and humiliations obstructed my path. Then I thought about the struggle “our struggle” as African American Women in Mississippi and I began to fight back. My grand parents could only have dreamed of the life I have today. Their struggle was the Klan the new struggle is self hatred and sexism of a Black Man. Black Women managers know that you are the captain of your soul, when you do your best people notice and know that you are not alone. My purpose is to be an inspiration and to change the abusive and divisive tactics of the AFGE president 589 in Jackson Mississippi to a spirit of collaboration and mutual respect.

  • Laura

    I noticed the same themes as a master’s degree student at the University of Michigan. I was the only black woman in my cohort of 25 students, and they felt extremely uncomfortable with me. I was constantly attacked during discussions, and my independence/confidence, education, articulateness and competence left many whites confounded. Whites’ perceptions of black women as baby mamas, ignorant, dependent, and unrefined are based on false stereotypes and pathetic media campaigns that have been going on for decades against us. Stand strong and focus on living well and keep on living a healthy lifestyle!

  • Tina

    Well, the only reason why I can see that the media wants to try to ruin our self esteem is because they somehow feel threatened by us or jealous at how we persist in adversity. What we have to ensure is that we come together and not fall into the trap. It’s all about mental manipulation. Please remember that.

  • Jackie

    Two more Black Female Top Management officials lose jobs today at the Jackson VA Hospital

    Being Black ,female and a top manager is getting tougher at the Jackson MS VAMC. Two more Top Black Females lost their current positions today. We need to pray that this young brother finds redemption or no Black Female administrator will be safe in Jackson. Only a few more top female managers left; who will be next??????????????

  • Baiaforever

    a lot of these white men are uneducated and stupid and they are jealous because a lot of black women don’t want them. I think they still harbor secret plantation fantasies about black women and hate when they see smart intelligent black women who don’t want them they are also losers. they are low class so they try to bring black women down with them too. it is a deliberate conspiracy.

  • bubgirl

    The greatest threat in the present to a sista’s self-esteem is a black man. The greatest threat in the present to a sista’s physical safety is a black man. The greatest threat in the present to a sista’s sexual safety is a black man. The greatest threat in the present to a sista’s material possessions and monetary fortune is a black man.

    Paradoxically, the opposite is true – the greatest potential joy and strength that a sista can get in life is a good black man, but that man is now 1 out of 100 black men in the present day. Soon it will be 1 out of 1000. We are being cheated by the failure of our men.

    That is all.

  • ffsam07

    I completely agree.

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  • guest

    Many black’s perpetrate a victim’s mentality and ‘look’ for racism. I am certainly not talking about all. Those strong black women such as Ms. Rice and other’s like her have one thing in common..grace. They are comfortable with themselves and comfortable with other’s regardless of race. It show’s in the way they hold themselves and in their countenence. I in all my 63 year’s have never ever been nor thought anything remotely racist. In fact my grandson has the best of both caucasion/black. I honestly don’t see skin colour. I see character..integrity goodness.grace to define a person. However i do see with the election of Obama a division among african american’s and as said by many black africans..a division among ‘white america’. The 2008 election brought ‘attack’s by black panther’s that is just as unacceptable as the kkk attack’s on black america. I am surprised black america has not stood up and against what happened at that polling place where the black panther’s intimidated. Racism..regardless by black’s or whites is ugly and unacceptable.

  • Beauzeaux

    Many many feminists have written about the attacks on Mrs. Obama. Maybe not every feminist everywhere but I don’t think it’s fair to judge a whole group of people based on a few no-account lowlifes.

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  • Kisha

    I wish that I didn’t have to agree with this so much.

  • HowApropos

    great reply

  • Shiksa Yisrael

    You wrote an article about black woman having class and than you end it with ‘sharpen knives’. Wow, in one swoop you proved your violent & ignorant. You go negro!

  • leah

    First of all, Michelle Obama is not black. Second of all, lots of white women voted for Obama.

  • Crossroads

    M. Obama not black? Put the crack pipe down!

    “Crack is whack!” – W. Houston

  • leah

    to Crossroads – sorry, I do not quite know what crack is but assume it has to be some drug. I do not smoke and never even tried any drugs. In my understanding she is not black because she does not have black skin but light Brown, she has slim nose and does not have big lips. Basically, she looks like a mixture of different nationalities, even her body looks slim and elegant. You will not find people like her in African Forrest!!! I guess better way to say she does not look like African American. I just do not see her as black. (As about me, I am white woman and a Republican.)

  • leah

    I gave it another thought, and I think it is because I simply do not notice the race when person is well behaved and intelligent….that would be best explanation.

  • http://Yahoo MS VAMC

    Jackson Mississippi Union President ‘s War on Black Women Managers

    The War on Black women managers continues at a Government hospitial in Jackson Mississippi. A union president’s anti management efforts against black women boarders on hate crimes. Black women are publically disgraced and raped of dignity for no other reason than being in a management role. All government emails are public domain. Evoke the FOIA and read for yourselves the harm this individual is causing. This threat to women’s rights deserves national attention.

  • http://yahoo Civility

    AFGE Union President is Rude to Mississippi’s Historic First Black and Female VISN Director

    Despite civil rights laws and anti-bullying legislation, Black Women managers at the VA in Jackson Mississippi are degraded by a male Union President. The AFGE union president wasted no time before demonstrating rude and unprofessional behavior towards the new Historic VISN Director. She acknowledged this in the March 23, 2012 town hall meeting. In the past 3 years unions played a direct role in the untimely retirement and removal of many Black Female managers and administrators. Much of the hostility is done via email or in open forum. Language is often personal and degrading. All government emails are public domain. Evoke the FOIA and read for yourself much of the humiliations that Black women managers endure at the hand of the AFGE 589 President in Jackson Mississippi.

  • Mo

    Leah…hahaha. How many Africans do you actually know to say none are slim or elegant? Maybe you should read about women from Africa, especially EAST Africa before commenting on a continent you clearly have no knowledge about. There is nothing more infuriating than someone making ignorant comments and trying pass them off as being 1) intelligent and 2) factual. Also, here is some more info for you, most “African” American are mixed race.

  • Bola UK

    Great article astounding responses even from ignorant too. Here in the UK its the same. Black women populate mid management positions where they are constantly in the firing line from superiors and subordinates. Michelle Obama is an African woman. Very empowering that she exists in that position. What is all this nonsense about Black being defined or ‘classified’ by body weight are there no fat white women in the world?

    Body fascism is insiduous the world over, but the way Black women are labelled agressive and ignorant too if they are overweight is quite amazing.

  • Deborah

    This is to Leah. since you do not know this. African American women come in different skin tones, from light brown, mocha to chocolate. We have different body shapes, sizes, tall, short and very tall. God made us extremely different, and for that we are proud women.

  • The Other Jess

    shut up dumb ass

  • The Other Jess

    Well, the Obama’s have been re-elected as President and First Family. Get ready, ya’ll! The smear campaign will kick into full overdrive now! Everyone who has ever been jealous or angry atthefact that there are 3 Black women sitting high up top will be doing everything in ther power to cut us down, in the manner this article states. That would include the media powers who will start and encourage the anti-Black woman propaganda, Black men, Latins and white women and men of certain types. Just watch – again Black women will be visibly removed from positive media, degraded, with attempts at humiliation. There are MANY people very angry that Black women are in highly visible powerful positions, even some who voted for President Obama. Get ready! It’s back to the races!

  • http://gravatar.com/deechagirl Dee

    never get high off your own supply…that is all.

  • http://gravatar.com/deechagirl Dee

    BLACK WOMEN FIGHT BACK!!!!

    Do NOT let those who tarnish our image get away with this. With Obama back in office, methinks that more of the same is going to happen.

    Instead of being shocked and offended, be proactive and defend ourselves. it doesn’ mean by emotion, but find tactical ways to fire back at the insults and disrespect aimed at us from ALL SIDES!

    Don’t look to others to rescue us or ‘white knight’ for our honor. We are on our own and we have to look to ourselves to counter-act the vitriol.

    Don’t let them get away with this.

  • R

    Excellent article, its very true! I swear, it never ends! Now they are complaining about Rice in the media nonstop! Its always something for them to whine about, especially whenever there is an African American woman in a position of power in any situation.

  • sarah

    well not really she is a american woman with brown skin she is an american and as soon as they all relax an realize that they are all the same they will go really far ..as a mixed woman who lives in the uk i haven’t had too much rubbish regarding my skin tone but i notice some odd comments on occasion the problem with humans is we want to have more than the next man…its the recourse of people with a low IQ ..in every culture you have lower classes yobs upper class snobs fat men/women..but we all like to feel superior lets face it the easiest way to discriminate is on physical features oh well the human race has come along way lol ..history has some of the most beautiful people beings have been from non European countries but who cares about the facts

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  • felicia

    I love Michelle she proved that you dont have to be mixed or white to be in a good marriage. I love the fact that she will be in the office for four more years. I ask for evetbody to keep praying to protect Michelle Obama and barack. The whole family

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