Peeped a really disgusting reader letter over at The Dirty this week:

Nik, so first let me say- I am a college student, double majoring at a university that I will not mention in a city that I will also not mention because I have quickly noticed this is a national/world wide issue. I also work in a bar on the weekends doing bottle service and I am used to drunk guys hitting on me all night long so it is not like I am overly sensitive to this issue. With that said… It makes me absolutely sick to my stomach the way that thuggish and to be honest ghetto black guys feel entitled and holler at white girls. It is f*cking disgusting. I go to a school in a coastal city, and I can’t even walk from my car to a building without feeling like some f*cking black dude is going to harass me. So I just wanted to make a public service announcement…. If you are a f*cking ghetto ass dude and you think that smacking your lips and spitting game at me is going to get your nasty *ss purple crayon in this– you are crazy.  So Nik, here is my question to you… What the hell is the problem? Are there seriously attractive white girls who give into this sh*t? Where do they live? Can we slap the jungle juice out of their system? Someone has to be to blame for this. I know tons of girls who are made so uncomfortable by things like this, and the issue is only growing. Nik please help.

Unsurprisingly, the site owner’s reply was pretty simple: “I think you are racist.” And while there was nothing surprising about the email either, it’s sad that this idiot broad (who is, obviously, a racist…and I have my doubts about the quality of that “university” based on her writing AND the fact that she thought a gossip blogger could help her with her ‘issue’) doesn’t understand that her Black female classmates are likely made to feel uncomfortable themselves when approached by thuggish guys. It’s called street harassment and sisters suffer more of it at the hands of men who look like them than anyone else. There is an “entitlement” issue with men of all races when it comes to approaching women…I’ve had terrible experiences with lower and middle class White men talking to me like I was a piece of meat. This isn’t Black man’s territory only.

I’m sure of you are wondering why even highlight this waste of flesh and bone, but its yet another unfortunate reminder of the glory of post-racial America. It’s amazing that those who have not suffered the transgressions of racism are still so filled with anger and hatred. Can you imagine the sort of paradigm shift it would take to get a woman like this to understand why those men behave as they do and how class/education inform those behaviors? God bless the USA. Ugh.

  • Jabjab

    Actually I don’t think its all that racist. Its true. Just because its coming from a white girl doesn’t negate the fact that ghetto black men do have an entitlement issue. In fact, entitlement is the perfect word for it. And no, I don’t see other races of men with this issue. I’ve NEVER been approached by any men of any other race in the way that (sorry to say but) ghetto black men do.

    African export just made a video about this issue. It aint cute. And I’ve been dealing with it since I was 12.

  • D-Chubb

    Cosign, Jabjab. But I would also say that the white chick shouldn’t be let off the hook because we agree with some of what she says. Because she probably thinks very little of Black women too.

  • JS….

    Now even though this chick is obviously racist I think she’s picking up on something that IS obvious to anyone with two eyes.

    1). Black men are notoriously THIRSTY for white flesh. That has been the case for a very long time. And now that so many fat white chicks are down for that ish they think every white woman (or non-black women) is ready to cross the swirl line (see Sex and Racism In America by Calvin C. Hernton)

    2). Black men are notoriously MORE aggressive than other races of men. Black women know this and I think non-black women know it too. In fact, I once had a white friend tell me this is the SOLE reason why she sleeps with black men. Unfortunately this behavior is also STEREOTYPICAL given the historical context of black male aggression. So while it’s true that all men in some way feel entitled, I would reason that most other races of men ONLY feel entitled to the women that SHARE their race. For example, I highly doubt a white man feels entitled to black women. However the only exception to this rule seems to be black men, who do in fact feel entitled to black women AND other races of women. I imagine this must be due to number ONE up above and their inability to compete with other races of men OUTSIDE of the bedroom. Basically they are probably compensating and trying to show for their manhood by being promiscuous.

    Personally I love women like this because they highlight black men’s unbelievable ignorance in thinking that ONLY white men are/can be racist.

    *Grabbing popcorn*

  • JS….

    “Just because its coming from a white girl doesn’t negate the fact that ghetto black men do have an entitlement issue. In fact, entitlement is the perfect word for it. And no, I don’t see other races of men with this issue.”

    Agreed other races of men don’t share this issue. I don’t think it’s just “ghetto” black men though. I think it’s black men period.

  • JS….

    *Correction to my statement up above…*

    Agreed other races of men don’t share this issue where women of other races are concerned.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kathy-Henry/1632750521 Kathy Henry

    All the men that put white women on a pedestal needs to read this article.

  • Anonymouse

    @Jabjab, I would have to disagree with you. Just like Jamilah said, this is NOT exclusive to “ghetto” black men. The most entitled and obnoxious men I have met are rich guys or guys who’ve always gotten what they want, whether they are white, black, Asian, or Hispanic. This girl reminds me of the UCLA girl and her rant about Asian people in the library. Same brand of entitlement and ignorance.

  • https://twitter.com/#!/AfroStyling AfroStyling

    Please free her. Substitute my black ass with her and its the same thing. Why do these fools think its ok to harass women?

  • Kayla

    You are just as dumb and stupid as the bitch who wrote the letter. “Slap the jungle juices out of their mouth” WTF that’s not racist. That type behavior happens in EVERY race not just black. Wake the F*ck up and a get clue!!!

  • https://twitter.com/#!/AfroStyling AfroStyling

    and who the fuck cares what makes these men act the way they do? i suppose since they themselves feel like they have been marginalized, they think its ok to go around harassing women? GTFOH! Just stop harassing women!

  • me

    “Black men are notoriously THIRSTY for white flesh”

    this was so funny I giggled loud!

  • Jabjab

    I’ll agree to disagree. I don’t deal with many rich men in general so we might have different experiences. But the experience that this white girl is talking about is COMMON. The whole “I can’t walk to my car without some ghetto ass dude smacking his lips at me feeling.” Yeah…that ish is real and common. I don’t want to throw all black men under the bus because its not all of them. I mean yeah a lot of black men are more outgoing in the sense that they will strike up a random conversation with you to get your number but thats not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the cat calls and the disrespect.

  • andre

    “For example, I highly doubt a white man feels entitled to black women.” i dont know what part of the country u live in or your experiences, but my experience and observation has been that white men have a real sense of entitlement toward black women. there have been numerous times that i have had to elighten a whitboy that he is in the wrong decade and has the oh so wrong brutha. to clarify, i have been in say the neighborhood sportsbar that may be predominantly white with a sistah and some drunken clown will come under guise of being friendly and totally be disrespectful. it is usually subtle so react in kind but firmly. i am an educated professional brutha and as far as whitegirls go…the only thing a whitegirl can do for me is introduce me to her black girlfriend, this coming form an aesthetic and pro cultural poit of view not a racist one.

  • Alexis

    lol at the popcorn… I can see this post getting crazy for sure.

    I agree with you on a lot of your points this issue is patently obvious.

    It just puzzles me how this who phenomenon developed… I like what you said about competitiveness ( or lack there of) in other arenas being perhaps one of the catalysts for this type of behavior.

    Since I’m a history major I’m always thinking of the historical realities So to your comment about men of other races not feeling entitled to women of other races I would say that historically white men did feel entitled to black women, especially in the south, which resulted in massive amounts of interracial rapes. And then there’s the whole specter of lynching of black men accused of raping white women

    ugggh sorry to get depressing.
    I don’t now how much that part of our history plays into where we are today; I think given this context it’s really interesting how we got to this point

  • Natalie

    Co-sign with Kathy.

  • S.M.M

    *rolls eyes*

    I guess the people who are saying that this type of behavior is exclusive to “thuggish” Black men have never had contact with affluent, White men, who won’t hesitate to sexually harass you every day and offer you obscene amounts of money to lay their piggy-pink poker next to you.

    I have always worked with executive, level White men and this had always been the case across industries in my 20 plus year career. I tell you if I didn’t have any moral scruples I would be filthy rich.

    Addtionally, my online dating experience has been the same. The majority of men who make contact with me are affluent, White men. Despite the fact my profiles ALWAYS specify that I’m not interested in White men. Unfortunanetly, this seems to make them more persistent and obnoxious in my case.

  • Alexis

    I agree with this for sure. It’s definitely women in general.

  • Jabjab

    Well you would be right. I don’t deal with rich white men but I could see them being a holes just like “thuggish” black guys.

  • JS….

    “So to your comment about men of other races not feeling entitled to women of other races I would say that historically white men did feel entitled to black women, especially in the south, which resulted in massive amounts of interracial rapes. And then there’s the whole specter of lynching of black men accused of raping white women.”

    Historically this is accurate, but I’m more incline to believe their entitlement stemmed from White supremacy in general. They felt the world and everything in it belonged to them…not just black women.

    I’m not sure if ^^this is still the case where women are concerned and I think this can be best illustrated by both the way white men approach black women or if they approach at all (and many do not).

    I date white men. I’m currently with a white man. He is not an aggressive man. In fact, he was very timid and shy about approaching me. This doesn’t speak of someone who feels entitled to another human being. This has been my experience with white men period. The same with Asian men.

    Now this might in part be because of the belief that black women aren’t interested in dating outside the race (or their lack of interest), but none the less I think non-black men’s laid back approach to women speaks volumes about their lack of entitlement issues. Having had this discussion with non-black women they say the same thing: Non-black men (particularly Asian and white men) don’t approach them aggressively.

    @Andre

    I’ll have to take your word for it. Drunk people do and say crazy things.

  • Alexis

    @JS

    yeah I agree with what you’re saying

    idk I think a lot of it may boil down your comment about inadequacies of some black men in other areas and feeling the need to overcompensate.

  • k

    yes..it seems that black men are more aggressive..I’ve actually not gotten out of my car and driven to a different store just b/c I see black men with baggy clothes in the parking lot. I wish that wasn’t the case b/c I know that I’m stereotyping. I’ve actually had a guy yell out ‘DAMN MA! MOVE SOMETHING!!’…i was so confused..was I supposed to drop it like it’s hot?? just b/c my butt is fleshy doesn’t mean that I’m supposed to walk and make it jiggle for you.

  • andre

    @JS i can apprecciate and agree with your historical perpective. i am a social worker but i have real affinity for history. as far being drunk, thes clowns arent always “drunk” yet and when they are i’ve always believed the words and deeds of a drunk person stem from a sober person’s thoughts.

  • SAA

    I’ll agree with some of the comments here. I think if we took out her race/ethnicity we could substitute it for any other but mostly women in general. While I’m not saying this behavior is exclusive to thuggish (Black) males, I am saying that in my personal experience it has solely been thuggish males who approach me in this manner. Even in college it was the thuggish (Black) males who I would receive that kind of unwanted attention from. Again like some of the commentators stated, they’ve been hit on/ approached by men of different races/ethnicites yet its mostly the Black guys who approach them in such a disrespectful, aggressive and overall “entitled” manner. We shouldn’t dismiss what this girl has experience just because she’s White.

  • Toni Childs

    The girl is very specific in saying “ghetto guys.” She likes black men, but she probably feels privileged to be with a new money negro!!

  • JS….

    I don’t think so. She sounds a lot like this woman:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rebecca_Latimer_Felton

    I can just see the chick who wrote the letter screaming at the top of her lungs for white men to stand up and prove their loyalty to white womanhood by lynching black men, who feel entitled to her goodies. SMH.

  • secret ninja

    wow. i am quite literally shocked and appalled, i just can’t believe there is anyone on here agreeing with any of the comments made by this “woman”. to think this behavior is limited to “thuggish ghetto black men” is crazy. as far as i’m concerned her very clearly racist mindset has made anything she said afterward null and void, and don’t give me any bs about how if the roles were reversed black men wouldn’t be calling her out, you don’t NOT call anyone on their sh!t just because if the roles were reversed that other party wouldn’t. NEWS FLASH if this girl doesn’t like their “purple” a$$ then she doesn’t like our “purple” a$$ either.

  • JS….

    People on here are not disagreeing with her outright because they have experienced what she spoke on first hand from *clutch the pearls* BLACK MEN!

    Furthermore I do think the “if the roles were reversed” argument is a VALID one.

    Black women, rightly so, are tried of standing up for black men and the ish not be reciprocated.

    Anyone is free and clear to throw black women under the bus. The only people who defend black women are BLACK WOMEN…9 times out of 10.

    Black men instead of standing up for black women will get their arses in line and wait their turn to do participate. We’re expected to be pitbulls for them while they stand around quiet as a church mouse for us. GTFOHWTBS!

    I guess ish doesn’t feel good when the shoe is on the other foot. Oh well…it’s not black women’s problem. Let the NAACP or one of the other black male centered organizations come to their aid.

  • JS….

    People on here are not disagreeing with her outright because they have experienced what she spoke on first hand from *grab the pearls* BLACK MEN!

    Furthermore I do think the “if the roles were reversed” argument is a VALID one.

    Black women, rightly so, are tried of standing up for black men and the ish not be reciprocated.

    Anyone is free and clear to throw black women under the bus. The only people who defend black women are BLACK WOMEN…9 times out of 10.

    Black men instead of standing up for black women will get their arses in line and wait their turn to do participate. We’re expected to be pitbulls for them while they stand around quiet as a church mouse for us. GTFOHWTBS!

    I guess ish doesn’t feel good when the shoe is on the other foot. Oh well…it’s not black women’s problem. Let the NAACP or one of the other black male centered organizations come to their aid.

  • LemonNLime

    I agree. I actually find it interesting that more people are a upset about her comment as opposed to what she has been through considering it is something many of us have dealt with, some on the daily bases. Did she present her comments eloquently? No, but that doesn’t negate the fact that in general we as women, whether black white, yellow, or green, would feel similar or do feel similar when we are in her position.

  • LMO85

    You beat me to it sis, I wholeheartedly agree with your comment. THIRSTY. I am sure these “brothas” bring out the worst in white women (read racists) because they shoot for the all or none approach, the same way they have always done with sistas. Some will respond in kind and some racists will not….This has EVERYTHING to do with Black men in general suffering from low self esteem, following the leader–in this case tv rappers and such and trying to stay on trend, wanting in on the Patriarchal pie, trying to overcompensate, etc., etc.–and thus their newly acquired taste for white flesh–that got real strong in the 90′s and has reached epic proportions of late.

    So why get mad at the white women and the Kardashians, the blame and the anger for these black men’s foolish behavior lies with them alone. They are playing themselves for the world to see. The only thing I regret is how badly it reflects back on Black women, when we have nothing to do with their pathetic whims and ways.

  • secret ninja

    and i guess i replied because i haven’t?

    *rolls eyes* get real.

    it’s not exclusive to black men, i’ve experienced this from mexican, white, asian, somali, ethiopian, etc. so you can kill that.
    as far as black men throwing black women under the bus is blah, blah, blah to me in this conversation as far as i am concerned. if anyone has here has seen any of my previous posts they know i’m not one to bend over backwards to kiss anyone’s a$$. i don’t put up with anyone’s bs, never have, never will.

    that being said, NOT responding to someone because “if the shoe was on the other foot black men wouldn’t” is a STUPID arguement.

    what she said was wrong, and i don’t give a got damn if those mfs were ghetto as hell. how does anyone know these men were really “ghetto”? it’s obvious from her comments that she would not view ANY black man (or black woman) in a positive light,
    i just can’t take her seriously. i stand by what i said.

  • Amber

    I think the phrases slapping “jungle juice” out of their system and their “nasty *ass purple crayons” would be considered racist.

  • proveit

    “SAY GIRL…SAY GIRL.. I KNOW YOU HEAR ME? OH YOU GOTTA MAN? WELL THATS OKAY..YOU CAN’T HAVE FRIENDS? COME ON GIRL…FINE B*TCH..F*CK YOU ANYWAY OL’ UGLY A** B*TCH” (if your lucky your won’t get hit or grabbed, i have had both several times)

    sounds familiar?

  • jamesfrmphilly

    i don’t deal with white women myself and i harass nobody

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Dvine-Lovin/1214037560 Dvine Lovin

    yeah they should.. but i didn’t like this article one bit.. i don’t like how she talks about black men or the fact that she believes she some piece of gold.. puhlease.. men will be men and some act like dogs in heat.. had it been a non-thugish black man would she be sayin the same shyt.. probably not..

  • TheT

    BOOM! You better tell it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • lostluv224

    She was racist beyond measure, and those agreeing with her are delusional. A damn doctor could have approached her and she would have probably called him a ghetto ass black man.

    and FYI black “ghetto” men aren’t the only ones guilty of this behavior, ive gotten it from all races of ALL classes. AND let’s not forget the WOMEN who behave in this manner too because they are definitly out there!

  • Shirl

    AMEN!!! I’ve dealt with that too. Being called stuck-up when I don’t respond. Once I was told by a brother after ignoring his crude remarks that he only dates white women cause all black b**tches have attitudes (no great loss). Well apparently all white women don’t seem to think that the black man’s ish dont stink I guess.

  • League

    This is just plain racist. I get harassed by older Italian men and white construction workers in NYC/Brooklyn on a daily basis. This is a class and cultural issue, not a race one. In Europe mostly in Spain, France and Italy women get harassed daily but I doubt she would call any of these men thuggish and ghetto if she visited there.

  • c0c0puffz

    I used to get groped and looked at by the arab men at the corner store my cousin worked at who happens to be female. They loved to flirt and hire black girls to work for them. Sexual harrassment is universal.

  • AY

    Come on now. This girl’s comments are filled with racial insults. But in general, we all know a certain class of black men who will make the most offensive rude comments to ANY woman of any race. I have heard black women complain about it just the same.

    Of course not every black male, but there are alot that just go for broke, and it is degrading.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ashley-Sykes/1065177536 Ashley Sykes

    yes!!!! i was just thinking that! this article reminds me of terry crew’s character from white chicks LMAOOOO

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ashley-Sykes/1065177536 Ashley Sykes

    i know i wasn’t supposed to…but i just about died @ “purple crayon” WTFF

    i wonder what those guys on youtube who make endless videos about how much they hate black women and how white women are the queens and so perfect feel about this article. hmmmmm

  • Perverted Alchemist

    Twenty dollars says the White college girl that posted the comment isn’t attractive in the slightest.

  • Ms. Information

    Lets be REAL…black men cat all and harass women more than any other race I have ever encountered and can be MAD disrespectful at it.

  • Ms. Information

    *CAT CALL

  • mluv

    To be honest, I thought this letter was funny. And I’m not offended or because I know not ALL BLACK men are NOT “ghetto” and not all BLACK MEN have a “thuggish” look. And Some people are just racist. Even in 2011.

    But what I would say is, this scenario can really apply to other men from other racial backgrounds as well. For me it can be black, white, mixed, mexican, indian, blue , orange and grey guys who will do the same thing. And I know a LOT of women can relate to this letter because we get hit on by all kinds of sane people and crazy fools.

    ooogly ass dudes be trying to hit on me, and about to fall apart but try to act like they got some game. Its their approach that can be a turn of, and they always feel like they gotta have some shit to say. Is she racist, so what. not anything new. there are some broken down, ugly ass men out there.. with no respect or morals and do not know how to treat or approach a woman. That can be ANY race or ethic background…

  • secret ninja

    @JS – “Anyone is free and clear to throw black women under the bus. The only people who defend black women are BLACK WOMEN…9 times out of 10.”

    hmmm..9 times out of 10 black women will throw EACH OTHER under the bus, you can look at the Mary J. Blige and Mean Girls articles on this website watch how we go in on Mary and Rihanna.

    the arguement of “tit for tat” went it comes to who is going to defend whom and when is getting tired. how’s that working for the black communtiy? it’s not. what it is is a never ending cycle that goes nowhere fast.

    it would be valid to say that if the shoe was on the other foot, this woman would not be jumping to defend one of us, so why are you?

  • http://kinksandart.tumblr.com Paris

    Ok so read and reread her little stupid letter just to make sure I read it correctly. NOWHERE in the article did she say she was being come at by these guys in a disrespectful or harassing manner. All she said was the she was repeatedly be approached by “ghetto, thuggish guys”. Can we really be sure that she wasn’t just being hollered at by everyday Black men but but her racist ass just happens to look at all Black men as “ghetto and thuggish”? We read her description of the guys and naturally assumed she was truly being disrespected, however this was never clearly stated in her letter. Maybe her racist ass looks at educated Jamal who goes to her university as “ghetto” or hell even rough around the edges Jamal who dresses “thuggish” probably just came up to her and said hello.

    This article clearly shows how we just make up the behavior and intent of someone in our heads based on the description of the person without even knowing the full story.

  • Chrissy

    Anyone is free and clear to throw black women under the bus. The only people who defend black women are BLACK WOMEN…9 times out of 10.

    Exactly. I am glad this white woman is speaking out. Because some of these black men will say I only date white women they dont act like yall and blah blah blah. lol. What a joke.

    It is also sad that black women will be the first ones to protest in defense of black men. But when black women need help? Where are the black men?

    For example a while ago there was video around about a black woman who was attacked by a black men while other black men just sat around and laughed. But if that woman was white that video would have made the news. The comments under that video was also disgusting.

    Black women need to let men fight their own battles and stop being mules to ‘help’ them. But imagine if you were being attacked there would be no one to help you.

  • proveit

    once two guys tried to hit on me, i just say hey and went on.. they grabbed their genitals and said F*CK YOU BITCH ILL KILL YOU B*TCH….also on that day one chased me and tried to grabb in Soho, i ran in a building…
    but also in that day a mexican guy playing a guitar sung to me in spanish about being pretty and a white guy said”hey beautiful,yes you are beautiful” as i walked by.. why can’t it just be like that ? a nice heyyyy or something nonthreatening of being threatened,grabbed or possibly raped

  • Chrissy

    Oh and there id no ‘black community’ a community cannot exist if it is one sided.

    Some black women need to put their womanhood first instead of their blackness. OMG. :: clutches pearls::

    Another example. Black women are expected to speak out against this white woman speaking about black men. But I bet Black men would dare not crucify that woman in an open forum.

    But let a black woman speak about this same thing….OH NO. She would be all kind of bitches, ho’s, hood rats. There would be comments talking about how she needed to get over it and be thankful someone approached her with her ‘stuck up’ or bougie ass….I could go on and on.

  • Interesting..

    It will be interesting to see how fast Black men’s stock drops when they have no one talking them up anymore. Basically the dersitability of others is from reccommandations. Both Asian men and black women images are constantly destroyed by public image and from word of mouth from the opposite gender of each respective race. Asian men are destroyed way more by American social Stereotypes while black women are destroyed by social stereotypes plus public ridicule from black men. Asian women and black man are desirable to other enthiciities because both Asian men and black women make other enthicities think that there most be something about Asian women and black men to fight for. I wonder what happens when black men are no longer put on a pedestal by black women as many are now doing by dating out.

  • secret ninja

    @Chrissy – “It is also sad that black women will be the first ones to protest in defense of black men. But when black women need help? Where are the black men?”

    “Black women need to let men fight their own battles and stop being mules to ‘help’ them. But imagine if you were being attacked there would be no one to help you.”

    and by that “tit for tat” mentality, you make yourself no better than the black men that don’t defend you, you are stooping to their level.

  • secret ninja

    @Paris – thank you.

  • lee

    Some, I emphasize some, black men are under the delusion that all white women want a black man. So they don’t hesitate when hitting on one, but I guarantee this woman is exaggerating. Most likely these same men are crude with every woman on the street. There are men of every race that are disrespectful when addressing a woman in public.

  • OptimusPhive

    I usually have something intellectually stimulating to say, but today isn’t that day….I bet she’s fat, ugly, & sloppy, because that’s the kind of White girl Black men drool over…ask Chris Rock! (^_^)

  • isis

    I totally agree with JS. Everyone knows black dudes are MAD thirsty for white/bright women. The whole world can see it. Glad a non black woman is finally putting them on blast lmaooo

  • Lola101

    LOL!!! she is SO right!! black dudes harrass white GIRLS… They are so thristy for white girls attn. it’s SCARY!!!!!!!!!

  • JS….

    @secret ninja

    it would be valid to say that if the shoe was on the other foot, this woman would not be jumping to defend one of us, so why are you?

    If you think I am defending this woman I say have your eyes checked. I called her a racist up above, which she is, but there is TRUTH in what she said. I’m not going to sit here and try to defend black men and their behavior when I don’t have a defense for it–whether it comes from a racist or not.

    It would be one thing if her experience was an isolated experience. It is not! I suggest you read the comments of your sisters.

    And when you actually find a black “community” in the true sense of the word LET ME KNOW.

    The only people that got black women’s backs are BLACK WOMEN and because of this they are RIGHT to drop black men on their arses. Let them get up and defend themselves in the same regard black women have to defend themselves.

    “hmmm..9 times out of 10 black women will throw EACH OTHER under the bus, you can look at the Mary J. Blige and Mean Girls articles on this website watch how we go in on Mary and Rihanna.”

    And when black women are COLLECTIVELY under attack we stand up and stand together COLLECTIVELY…don’t get it twisted.

  • OptimusPhive

    Perfectly said JS! Perfectly said!!! **reaches hand in JS’s popcorn bowl**

  • amanda

    I made the mistake of following the link to the website and reading the comments and I am amazed by how horrible people are. It is amazing how racist people can be when they are hiding behind a computer and using the name “Anonymous”.

  • secret ninja

    @JS – no sweetie, you are the one that needs to get your eyes checked. where in this letter did she say these “ghetto thuggish black men” came at her in a disrespectful way? as someone else mentioned, she did not specify, so they really could have said anything to her, it could have been a hello, hell, they could have just looked at her.

    people are jumping to conclusions here.

    you’re also jumping to conclusions in your assumption that i’m defending that type of behavior when i’m not, as i’ve said, it’s happened to me from a number of races -not just black men. no where did my comments imply that i was.

    as far as black women defending each other collectively that is a joke.

  • Shun

    K, I have had the same exact experiences you have….I agree…if this had been a black chick saying this, all the black women would be high fiving each other…HOWEVER, the “jungle juice” was un-called for…but I’m sorry…the “purple crayon” was funny as hell…LOL

  • JS….

    @secret ninja

    “no sweetie, you are the one that needs to get your eyes checked. where in this letter did she say these “ghetto thuggish black men” came at her in a disrespectful way?”

    I suggest you read my comments ^up above because I for one don’t think this type of behavior is limited to “ghetto thuggish black men.” Truth be told white collar black men have entitlement issues too. It might be more subtle with them but it’s defiantly there. It’s this group that expects an reward or special treatment for doing what NORMAL people just do–like staying away from crime, getting an education being productive, and having good credit. That’s why they self-proclaim themselves as “good” black men. So even if she is attacking ALL black men I don’t personally feel sorry for them. I know this behavior is not limited to the “ghetto thuggish black men.” I have experienced it myself from non-ghetto black men, who have no problem showing their hurt egos when I say, “Not interested.”

    Next…

    “as far as black women defending each other collectively that is a joke.”

    When the COLLECTIVE of black women is under attack (i.e., the article from the Asian man) the COLLECTIVE of black women stand together and that’s what I witnessed when that article hit the net. Stop acting brand spanking new.

    Anyway…I’m done here.

  • secret ninja

    @JS – yeah, you are done because no where in your comment did you respond to any the questions i raised, you danced around them.
    i read your comments and quite a few of the statements you made are invalid in regards to this conversation. don’t put words in my mouth because i never said anything about “white collar black men” not engaging in that type of crude behavior or my not believing that kind of behavior happens.

    my stance remains the same.

    gtfoh with that “women standing together” bs i’m not standing together with a racist. this is not a difference of opinion, this is a right is right and wrong is wrong scenario. that whole letter is all kinds of wrong. keep holding the wool over your eyes if you want to. you’ll get that “nigga wake-up call” from some of those same women you call yourself standing with soon enough. the only one acting brand new here is you.

  • JS….

    ““gtfoh with that “women standing together” bs i’m not standing together with a racist. ”

    SMH…go get that eye exam chick. Please go get it. This is NOT what I said my comment.

    I mentioned the black woman collective standing together when we’re collectively being attacked and you equate that to ALL women standing together…I don’t want to call you stupid…I’m trying not to but clearly you ain’t reading and comprehending.

    and this…

    :”don’t put words in my mouth because i never said anything about “white collar black men”

    I didn’t attribute to you. SMH

    I’m really done!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Stacy-Australia/45504695 Stacy Australia

    Some of these comments are hilarious. I don’t like calling people racist but this article and some of the comments following are very ignorant. It’s bad enough ‘Becky’ wrote this letter degrading black men but some of these comments (I assume from black women) are even worse. Yeah, there are some black men like that but they’re are also some white men, Asian men, Latino men etc with the same demeanor. It’s not specific to race. All women are harassed. But it seems like because it was “black men” all hell broke loose. As someone mentioned in an earlier comment, ‘Becky’ probably think ALL black men are ‘thugs and ghetto’

    I wish we would stop bringing each other down and start uplifting one another. This article was about how ignorant this chick is and some of y’all turned it into a “I hate black
    men, all black men are full of s**t” rally.

    Can we get it together??

  • Alexandra

    This girl is beyond ignorant. And I agree with those that said she probably sees all Black men as ghetto, even if one isn’t. How could she be specifying a type of Black male with that ‘purple crayons’ comment? She even uses “ghetto” and “Black” interchangeably.

    That said, there’s a lesson to be learned here. That goes for all men.
    I’m sick and tired of being harassed the Mexican guys working on a house in my neighborhood. What the hell do these men get out of that?

  • TheBestAnonEver, Part 2

    Pink, purple, are there any other colors I am not aware of?

    I am dying of laughter. Serves them right.

  • Alexandra

    I agree with the first paragraph of your comment. But how is your “Becky” comment any different?

    Why is Becky a go-to name Black women use to call White women? Seriously?

  • http://www.tearyne.net/blog Taryn

    No one is dismissing what she’s said because she’s white; they’re dismissing what she’s said because she’s a racist. She could have made her point without stooping down to the level of speech (purple crayon, etc.) she’s gone into. She’s more mad that the men are black than the fact that their assholish pigs. It’s clear from her choice of words.

  • http://www.tearyne.net/blog Taryn

    They’re*, not their. Fragment of a changed sentence.

  • Akosua

    @secret ninja. Who do you think shut down the “Psychology Today’ article about bw being unattractive?—– Collective black women. Not black men. Not non-black ppl but bw. Do so fact checking. bw women do Collectively support one another.

  • secret ninja

    @JS – “I’m not going to sit here and try to defend black men and their behavior when I don’t have a defense for it–whether it comes from a racist or not.”

    you said that right? that’s the comment i was referring to when i made the comment about “standing together”, but i’m sure you knew that. ;-)

    “I’m really done!”

    are you sure sweetie? you’re too thick headed to get it now, but when you get that “nigga wake-up call”, maybe you’ll jump off that “all black men ain’t sh!t” train.

  • JS….

    @Akosua

    Thank you!

  • Chrissy

    @secretninja

    No, I believe in mutually beneficial relationships. I do not believe in one sided relationships. It is not a womans ‘place’ to come to a man’s rescue. That is not how it is done.

    That white woman was talking about black men. Is she a racist? Most likely without a doubt. But why is this being posted on a black woman site? What does this have to do with black women? Like I said I bet no black men would speak about this white women in a public forum. Ha Ha. Guess what will happen. The ‘men’ will handle that. But if a black woman said this????? OH HELL NO.

    Men fight battles with other MEN. Not women fighting for men. I believe in self preservation. I do not stand with anyone that does not stand with me. Like I said it is a mans ‘job’ to protect women. That is how society works.

    With the example I gave above, about the black woman being attacked by black men. Not one man tried to help her at all. Instead they laughed. And like I said the comment section was even worse. Now let that have been a white woman being attacked by black men. Laughing? I think not. It would have been all over the news. If the men are the ‘leaders’ and ‘protectors’ they lead and women follow. When men decide they no longer want to do that then what happens? Look at the ‘black community’

    Do white men expect white women to jump up in defense of their manhood? Or do they(the men) handle it?

    Like I said above I am a woman. My womanhood is before all else. I do know that I am black. Yep. But I realized being a woman first and not a ‘black’ woman has benefits. I could go on and on and on about this topic.

    You could say I am no better than black men but what has black woman being in defense of black men all the time gotten black women??? Why am I(a woman) fighting men’s battles???? Hell why am I expected to? Like I said self comes first. Black women need to put their needs first before they try to save a community that does not exist.

    I know people will disagree…oh well.

  • Shun

    I laughed too…too funny…

  • secret ninja

    @Akousa – lmao, i think you need to look back at that article and the articles afterward because there were quite a few from non-blacks that refutted that claim.

    not only does your response NOT correspond with my comment but it is WRONG because you are misinformed, go back and look at the Psychology Today website and all the articles that came after it, you will see some very white faces refuting the claim that was made.

  • AustralianGirl

    Hi Stacey,

    another Aussie on here :-)

  • OMSS

    @Secret Ninja, I totally agree!!!

  • OMSS

    @ secret ninja, totally agree!

    Oh, and J. S…. aka J u s t s a y i n…. is always talking smack about black men when ever possible!

  • TheBestAnonEver, Part 2

    The non-blacks that refuted the claim only did so after the uproar from black women. If black women kept silent, they would have kept silent. Give credit where credit is due.

    I have read your comments and it is not even clear what exactly you are arguing about. Everyone you are arguing with has acknowledged this woman is racist, but are also stating they have experienced the same thing. I know I have. They are also saying they don’t feel compelled to get outraged and come to black men’s defense, but for some odd reason you have taken that personally. Why should a woman feel obligated to defend a group of people that she doesn’t feel would defend her and have done the same thing to her. I don’t get why you seem more angry at the commenters than at the white racist or the men harassing women. Bizarre.

  • Jtao

    You are aptly named…lol

  • secret ninja

    @JS and Chrissy – in your case, the lights are nobody’s home. clearly.

    @JS – “I’m not going to sit here and try to defend black men and their behavior when I don’t have a defense for it–whether it comes from a racist or not.”

    that was the comment you made.

    “gtfoh with that “women standing together” bs i’m not standing together with a racist.” was the comment i made.

    see how that works sweetie? you said something, then i said something.
    my reply was in reference to your comment. you do know what i mean when i say in ‘reference to’ don’t you? oh why am i asking when clearly you don’t, so let me break it down for you.

    when you made the comment “I’m not going to sit here and try to defend black men and their behavior when I don’t have a defense for it–whether it comes from a racist or not.” you sided yourself with a racist, you therefore are standing together with her, and that’s aside from the fact that she never made clear in her letter what exactly went on. they could have said ‘hello’, they could have just looked her way, or none of the above. some people are jumping to the conclusion that they came at her wrong when they might not have come at her at all.

    @Chrissy – it’s not about “coming to the defense of black men” because that is not what i’m doing. a racist is a racist, whether she cries wolf or not. this is about being the bigger person. you are living in a bubble with rose colored glasses, you may see yourself as a woman first and black second when it suits you, but for the most part, the world has seen and will always see you the other way around. we have two strikes against us (black and woman) not one.

  • binks

    I’ am going to go in the opposite direction and say maybe SHE is the one with entitlement issues in this scenario. First, I don’t know whether to laugh or shake my head at this article. Secondly, it is hard to comprehend what she is saying (hopefully one of those double majors isn’t in English). And lastly, the reason I think she is the one with entitlement issue is she is probably one of those women where it is all fine and good when men drool over their beauty and put them on a pedestal because it buck their head up because they think they are the crème of the crop or that they can be COOL with old boy but let one of them ask her out…..an automatic cry of foul of how dare you disrespect me or come at me. This girl needs a clue, like mention would she feel the same way if it was a “ghetto” white boy approaching her, Latin dude, rich dude, etc.? But I do agree that guys have entitlement issues my beef are with old men now that doesn’t have a freaking clue when to stop

  • Chrissy

    I see we just have two different mentalities. I am all for being the bigger person but sometimes being the sacrificial lamb will not cut it.

    I dont mind an eye for an eye mentality. Sometimes that is absolutely necessary. I do not think anyone should be in any relationship that is not beneficial to both parties. When person knows it is one sided they should exit. Self first.

    As far as woman first black second. I was making the point that I obviously know I am both. But lets say I am in a country that is majority black or brown? Am I a ‘black’ woman or just a woman? I live in US and I know I am black but I believe the ‘black’ mentality first is crazy. I believe if most black women would change their mentality on being black first it would be a whole lot better. But I dont expect that to happen. The woman first is a mentality. It would have you operate in a different way. I know how I am seen by other people but being a woman first has more benefits. In my experience.

  • JaeBee

    “The girl is very specific in saying “ghetto guys.” She likes black men, but she probably feels privileged to be with a new money negro!!”

    Nah, she clearly expressed her dislike of “purple crayons” –new money negroes still have them.

  • JS….

    @Secret Ninja

    “when you made the comment “I’m not going to sit here and try to defend black men and their behavior when I don’t have a defense for it–whether it comes from a racist or not.” you sided yourself with a racist, you therefore are standing together with her,”

    Actually this is YOUR interpretation of what I said…not actually what was WRITTEN. *Face palm*

    In your mind because I don’t defend black men’s INDEFENSIBLE behavior I am siding with the racist.

    Well you can kiss my arse!

    Because I am not going to sit here and make excuses for ignorant nonsense…I don’t care who it’s coming from. If that makes me a “race traitor” in your book so be it. Frankly people like you are part of the issue. Instead of addressing the behavior of these men (and the racist) you take issue with people NOT defending black men and their behavior because the messenger is racist. Talk about deflecting.

    The reality is it wouldn’t matter if this message had come from a BLACK WOMAN. The reaction from black male identified women like yourself would still be the same. The only difference is it would be harsher with the aid of black men.

    That’s really your issue with me and others….we’re not standing in line with your twisted vision of racial solidarity.

    We’re supposed to hold hands with our disturbed “brothers” and defend them from racist attacks…despite the truth in the words of the racist. We’re just supposed to ignore what we have experienced in order to defend their behavior from the raft of this white woman–a woman many of them would have no problem putting on a pedestal while bashing black women– if she didn’t verbalize her hatred. Forget our own integrity… we’re just supposed to do it because we’re black. Miss me with this nonsense.

    I don’t defend B.S. to save face. I don’t care who it is coming from. Again if that means I’m siding with the “enemy” so be it. No man or race is worth my own personal convictions.

    Conversation over.

  • JS….

    @OMSS

    And I noticed people like yourself can’t say anything to rebuttal my “smack.”

  • http://www.pinkpantiesandleopardlipstick.wordpress.com Pink Panties and Leopard Lipstick

    Look I’m not even mad or offended. This was SO ridiculous that I can hardly take it seriously. It probably is tho… and that hurts me, but I’m far from surprised.

  • Patricia K

    First of all, I don’t believe these comments saying these sistas have gotten sexually harrassed by white men the same way that black guys harrass them. Just miss me with that, k? I used to live in the hood and now I live in a mostly white area and that kind of ish never happens with white guys, asian guys, or hispanic guys, JUST THE BROTHERZ.

    They’re crude, they’re pushy, they’re obnoxious, they try to touch you, and when you try to get them away from you, they get incredibly loud and abusive, calling you all kinds of names.

    C’mon now! You men, and some women, are acting all brand new on this, but there are a lot of black men and black boys that somehow got the idea that all the kitty in the world belongs to them.

    This white woman is a racist, nodoubtabouthat. But that doesn’t mean that the behavior by black men (not just thugs, y’all) she describes doesn’t happen EVERY DAMN DAY.

    Ride the El in Chicago, ride the subway in NY, and black boys/men are being nasty to black women all the time and other race women some of the time.

    You can promote some fake reality where black men are perfect gentlemen all you want, but that ain’t gonna make it so.

  • anita

    this gone be 100++ comments.. i can’t wait… *insert michael jackson eating popcorn at the movies in thriller*

  • JS….

    Co-sign.

  • OMSS

    +1,000,000!

  • OMSS

    @JS…. Oh that is simple! Your arguments (conquering and dividing, anyone?) are tired and you are not worth arguing with! Secret Ninja killed it already and you are too blind to see it!

    I have been aggressively hit on by men of all races (Caucasian, African, Far-East Asian, Middle-East Asian, and South)! I live in a heavily African/African Caribbean and South Asian community. I have found the SA flirting absolutely filthy and degrading. Do I think that they all like this? NO! Have decided that I would never date a South Asian? NO! I will date someone if I feel them as person, not their skin colour or ethnicity!

    I am sorry your perception of Black Men is so low. I guess something happened to you or you were not fortunate enough to have wonderful black male role models/success stories in your life like myself- at home (my father), my extended family (I have 15 uncles and numerous male cousins who are working and responsible fathers) and I am surround by them at the University I attend.

    I have rolled my eyes and ignored your comments for a long time now, but that sly name change pushed me to call you out! LOL! I’m going to carry on reading your comments like I do with everyone else (it’s only fair, and everyone has the right to their own opinions), but I will continue to ignore your comments as usual. Have a nice day!

  • OMSS

    +1

  • Isis

    Who cares if she’s racist many white people are, but she’s telling the truth about their deplorable behavior. But, I’m guessing that’s ok with some of you women cuz its black men we’re talking about huh?? Lawd no wonder we can’t get many of them to graduate HS or lead decent lives cuz the mammies are always coming to their defense. ughh

  • S.M.M

    @Patricia K.:
    “First of all, I don’t believe these comments saying these sistas have gotten sexually harrassed by white men the same way that black guys harrass them. Just miss me with that, k? I used to live in the hood and now I live in a mostly white area and that kind of ish never happens with white guys, asian guys, or hispanic guys”
    ———————————————————————–
    Your comment only speaks to your experience and your obvious level of non-attractiveness. It by no means negates mine or others unpleasant experience of sexual harassment by White men. And I know from my equally attractive friends that I’m not ALONE.

  • jmeagain..

    @OMS

    I just love it when delusional people speak.

    Secret ninja just got served by me and 3 other people.

    And the “sly name change” was due to this blog TRYING to censor me. It wasn’t of my own doing . I don’t have a reason to hide. So keep calling me out. Did you fail to notice that you actually had to spell out my former name for it to actually post???

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Hareema-Akinak/100000531851239 Hareema Akinak

    You’re right….101 comments so far lol!

  • JS….

    @OMSS

    I just love it when delusional people speak.

    Secret ninja just got served by me and 3 other people.

    And the “sly name change” was due to this blog TRYING to censor me. It wasn’t of my own doing . I don’t have a reason to hide. So keep calling me out. Did you fail to notice that you actually had to spell out my former name for it to actually post???

  • JS….

    Just so I’m clear: The ability to be sexually harassed (specifically by white men) is the measuring stick for attractiveness now?

    Not to defend Patricia K, but she didn’t say she doesn’t get hit on by non-black men. She was speaking of crude behavior which she hasn’t experienced from non-black men…or at least that’s what I gathered from her comment.

  • Bust

    YOU BETTER PREACH OMSS!!

    YOU BETTER PREACH!

    ‘Ol tired ass heffa…

  • http://kmichelpress.blogspot.com/ K. Michel

    “Nik, so first let me say- I am a college student, double majoring at a university that I will not mention in a city that I will also not mention because I have quickly noticed this is a national/world wide issue.”

    “It makes me absolutely sick to my stomach the way that thuggish and to be honest ghetto black guys feel entitled and holler at white girls.”

    “What the hell is the problem? Are there seriously attractive white girls who give into this sh*t? Where do they live?”

    Really?

    I’m going to veer from what everyone else thinks. The person writing the letter has fabricated it, and I’ll explain why I think so.

    This entire letter seems designed to be sensational, over-the-top and foster an agenda. A lot of people when they lie, they’re compelled to do it superfluously. They’ll give you “extra information”. Right?

    So, maybe they’ll be a double major …when the number of declared majors is of no importance to their message. One reason that liars DO do this is so that the persons being lied to associate them with being hardworking and, thusly, someone they should sympathisize with.

    A woman who’s been harrassed by a man isn’t going to say “I’m a double major at a university. That guy keeps grabbing my arm when I walk down this avenue.”

    She’ll get straight to business. “That guy keeps grabbing my arm when I walk down this avenue.”

    Also, this person isn’t very clear with her experiences. Which is incredibly odd. When most Black women complain about street harrassment, they are vivid in their complaints.

    “He grabbed my ass.”
    “He said, ‘Ayo ma! Lemme see you moo’ dat one time’!!’”

    Victims of this harrassment make it VERY CLEAR about how they were being abused.

    Yet, with this person, their account is so vague. What exactly did these “thuggish men” do? What did they say? Plus, this seems like the kind of person who wouldn’t hesitate to get as graphic as they could.

    Finally, the fact that this person expanded this to all Black men and White women worldwide told me that this account never happened. This person came to Nik to solve her personal problem of Black men “hollering” at her …on her campus. How would asking for help with a national/worldwide problem help with her immediate situation?

    “Can we slap the jungle juice out of their [attractive White women] system”?

    How would doing this help the person with their personal problem? It wouldn’t. But, it would foster an agenda of selling this propaganda that Black men really are “thirsty” for White women (even though all statistical evidence, and overwhelming personal testimonies from Black men, dictate otherwise). But also, that a lot of attractive White women like it.

    I will say that for those who take this person at their word, I can’t blame you. African-American men (a group I am proudly part of) are notorious for street harrassment. I’m not happy about saying it, but you know what? I’m disappointed at our collective behavior on the streets.

    It’s not cool for Black women to be afraid of us, and I’m optimistic that there are Black men who feel that it’s not a healthy interaction for us to be having either. So, with that said, we (African-American men) have to make some moves here. If you’re 25 like myself, then one day it’ll our daughters out on these streets. Plus, we already have our sisters, mothers, aunts and girlfriends out here right now…?

  • JS….

    @OMSS

    And let me add this…

    Conquering and dividing implies that we are monolithic. We are NOT…nor have we ever been

    Also I guess white/non-black women and the black women on this blog who have experienced this ish from black men must ALL come from fatherless homes or have daddy issues. Like I said delusional…

    It’s no longer black women speaking out…I wonder what will be the reason people come up with for white women speaking out… oh wait that’s when itches like you will start dropping the race card.

  • http://www.clutchmagazine.com Clutch

    Justsayin’-It doesn’t matter what name you use, if your comments are offensive and out of line, we reserve the right to delete them. You are NOT the only person who has experienced comment deletion. Furthermore, the “this blog trying to censor me” implies that either you have some powerful message that we are vested in keeping from the masses or that you have a right to say whatever you want on a site which you do not own. Neither of these things are true.

  • JS….

    @Mod

    I am no longer able to use my regular name. While I agree there are other comments deleted from this site I also know that there are respectful comments from men and women that are deleted for no particular reason. I have watched them disappear. If I could highlight such comments I would.

  • secret ninja

    @TheBestAnonEver, Part 2 – when did i not give credit? i was responding to someone who claimed that there were no non-black people that had something to say about the article. just because they didn’t respond to the article as fast as YOU would have liked does not erase the fact that they responded. i’m sure there’s alot that goes into responding to an article with another article, so of course it’s not going to pop up right away.
    as far your not understanding what i said, i’ll let you re-read the letter and then re-read my comments, let that marinate, because there is nothing NOT to understand.

    it’s very clear that i am upset with the woman who made the racist comment. i am equally upset with some of the commenters. why?

    because it appears that no one actually read the letter. there has yet to be an answer to my question: where in the letter did she say that black men came at her wrong? call her out her name? grab at her? hit her? cursed her out?

    she said: “It makes me absolutely sick to my stomach the way that thuggish and to be honest ghetto black guys feel entitled and holler at white girls. It is f*cking disgusting. I go to a school in a coastal city, and I can’t even walk from my car to a building without feeling like some f*cking black dude is going to harass me. So I just wanted to make a public service announcement…. If you are a f*cking ghetto ass dude and you think that smacking your lips and spitting game at me is going to get your nasty *ss purple crayon in this– you are crazy.”

    so “holler at white girls” and “spitting game at me” sounds like these guys may have tried to do just that, spit some lame, corny lines. or they may have just said “hello”, or looked at her, or in her direction, or *gasps* not all!

    next, just from the comments alone, some women seem to seperate themselves from these “nasty a$$ purple…f*cking black dudes” as if that woman would only use those terms in speaking about black men and couldn’t possibly include black women. i’m sure if her letter ran long enough, it would have been ‘n!gger this!’ and ‘n!gger that!’ like i said before if she looks at them that way, she looks at ALL black men that way, and, in turn, looks at black women that way too. but you’re going to side with her because she’s a woman? because if the shoe was on the other foot, black men wouldn’t come to the rescue? oh i see. this whole scenario of tit for tat goes like this: “you ain’t sh!t” (proceeds to throw sh!t) “no you ain’t sh!t (proceeds to throw sh!t) and the sh!t throwing proceeds to go back and forth from BOTH parties, accomplishing NOTHING, but covering each other in sh!t

    that is the DUMBEST line of reasoning i have ever heard.

    @JS – you served no one. you just provided more bs line of reasoning that makes sense to no one else but you and the other three personalities you have. there are meds for that. you should invest in them. you’re in desperate need.

  • OMSS

    @Bust,*In Martin’s Jeromey Rome Voice* Thankya, Thankya!

    LMAO! I am Done with her! She is clearly missing a few screws! It is quite sad she has dedicated so much time and energy to hate this much! It is also funny how she scooted around my comment and has deliberately miss-interpreted what I said to fit in with her argument! She or her fellow supporters haven’t served anyone!

  • JS….

    @Secret ninja

    “but you and the other three personalities you have. there are meds for that. you should invest in them. you’re in desperate need.”

    I’m sure the mods who have their foot on my throat can attest to the reality that I am ONLY one person here.

    @Mods

    Clearly you’re selectively reading the disrespectful comments (i.e., those above this one).

  • http://@clnmike Clnmike

    Excellent deductive skills, lol.

  • http://thegirlwiththecrown.tumblr.com thegirlwiththecrown

    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

  • http://@clnmike Clnmike

    I got $50 says she isnt a girl.

  • OMSS

    K. Michel. Great comment! I love how you broke it down and pretty much proved it was fake, and addressed a problem too common among men- as I said before I don’t think it is necessarily a black issue.

  • secret ninja

    @K. Michel, Clnmike, thegirlwiththecrown, and OMSS – co sign all the way!!!

  • http://@clnmike Clnmike

    The only thing that can be safely said is that there are men who have entitlement issues of all races and class lines. They dont have separate trains for men and women in India for nothing, girl fetuses are not aborted in China for nothing, removing the clitoris of women in Africa isnt done for nothing,Dominique Gaston André Strauss-Kahn doesnt walk for nothing, rape of women during slavery didnt happen for nothing, on and on. Singling out one group over another doesnt help change things.

  • whilome

    Seriously laughing my behind off. This letter was more than likely written by a troll who intentionally put the inflammatory racist crap in there. However– I’ve seen that same type of ish written in the contents of THIS forum, ostensibly from black women, about these “type of men” who try to spit game.

    Take the “purple crayon”-type stuff out that letter and could have just as well been written by QueenofWhitecaste (sic). Now tell me I’m lying!

  • Chrissy

    Exactly.

  • Patricia K

    Oh, yeah. The mammies and the jaihouse lawyers are howling.

    “Black men would never disrespect a woman like that”

    But if they did, it’s a rogue element”

    And furthermore, it’s important to say that other men do this same thing”

    And this woman’s a racist”

    And how do we know what she meant to say?”

    I’m confused as to what she meant”

    “Black women, you know us, and you are our queens”

    “Everyone knows white men raped black women back in the day”

    “She’s probably ugly, anyway”

    She wasn’t specific enough regarding how, why and where she was sexually harrassed, therefore it probably didn’t happen.

    And more blah, blah, blah. I am 51 years old and I have been around black men my whole life. The past 20 years I have seen a vulgar, profane, nasty, brutish attitude take root among black men when they’re interacting with black women (and now other women) in public. Don’t try to throw shade my way and tell me I’m imagining things. I know what I see and hear, thank you very much, and it is awful and ugly.

    I fear for our women and girls, I really do.

  • ruggie

    This happens a lot in gentrifying areas, w/thug-type brothas harassing white women they now see as “accessible.” We’re in a shifting culture but the rules are the same: many men feel entitled to treat women a certain way. Now it just happens to cross racial lines.

  • sandrine

    So…if all races of men are the same and have the same faults, are there no areas for any type of collective growth or improvement among black men? Their only problems are propaganda, racism and a corrupt judicial system, with no room for critique or self-leadership?

  • Well…

    It is what it is. A lot of White people are racist…whats new? And deep in there behind the racism, the stereotyping, and the generalizations…she kind of has a point. I’ve found myself defending aggressive Black men to my White friends in college numerous times ..yes attempting to defend men who were also as disrespectful to me. I will always remember the night I thought it was a good idea to take some of my dorm floormates to a black club….embarrassing to say the least. Obviously not all Black men behave this way, but for the ones that do… what do they expect other women to think when they behave like thirsty sex starved animals?

  • COCO

    What do I say? She is NOT lying about the rude behavior. I have heard if you really want to see brothers in action hit up Miami on Memorial day or Black beach week. I mean she is ignorant but what does it say about all these”BOYS” trying to “holler” at her. What is funny is the fact that they think she is interested-like all white women are. Reagrdless, is she is fat,skinny,tall or short “she doesn’t like it” and MOST GROWN women don’t. All that cursing and trying to touch people you don’t know is direspectful. Nobody cares about your economic condition or lack of education when they are walking down the street and your cursing them out. WTH! She may be ignorent but that doesn’t negate the fct she is 90% correct.

  • Candy (aka Leanee)

    Hmm…

  • ghosttown

    you may have a point.. but see black men holler/harrass anything with a warm hole…so if she is “unattractive” as you say, that speaks volumes to their thirst

  • CAZ

    We see it all the time, from movies, to music videos, to porn. White women are often portrayed as either sexually vulnerable, easy prey, or secretly wanting some black d–k. Add the fact that alot of men(young black men in particular), try to holla at women in all sorts of disrespectful, trifling ways. As a black woman, I have guys approach me the same way all the time yet they have the nerve to get mad(and call u a few dirty names) when u don’t give them any feedback. I read a story on this site about a guy who shot a girl because she didn’t give him her number. That’s the sort of bs women of ALL colors have to deal with. If that article is true, it’s definitely not off the mark.

  • Girl

    ‘I will say that for those who take this person at their word, I can’t blame you. African-American men (a group I am proudly part of) are notorious for street harrassment. I’m not happy about saying it, but you know what? I’m disappointed at our collective behavior on the streets.”

    THANK YOU.

    to hell with the fake email..thank you for acknowledging what black women deal with when walking. very depressing, when you mention it to others they vehemantly deny it.

    to be honest while your skills are great, only reason why I personally found the email fake is because ive yet to see black men treat white women with such disrespect in public. white woman walks by..silence..black woman walks by ;smile for me, move your ass for me blah phucking blah

  • Chnyere

    sadly, i kinda have to agree, smh :(

  • Chnyere

    good point, very interesting

  • Quell

    It’s racist because she thinks it happens to her because she’s white, not realizing that all women get harassed verbally by those type of men. It sounds like she’s saying black men want her so much because she’s white, and if you didn’t think the phrase ‘Jungle Juice’ wasn’t racist then I don’t know what to say.

  • Merci

    agreed!

  • Merci

    @Shirl. Thank you.
    So many times, I have been called stuck up, because I don’t respond to cat calls or when men beep their horns at me.

  • Quell

    Though I think this female is clearly racist I’d have to agree with some of the points she made. Black men tend to be more aggressive, and I don’t feel comfortable walking past a group of them. I’m only speaking of the thugged out ones who have no goals and stand in the same spot all day. I live in Harlem and even the thugged out Hispanic dudes are not as aggressive and disrespectful towards women as black men are, and it’s extremely uncomfortable. I’ve had experiences with men of all races and honestly I’ve never been made to feel uncomfortable by a man who wasn’t black.

  • lola289

    “It’s not cool for Black women to be afraid of us…”
    I have such a hard time w/ this but you’re right. I hate to admit it >:(
    Its so sad that this is a reality. Blk men need help..

  • Jabjab

    lmao..i leave for the day and my gosh the comments exploded! Well, I’d agree with you guys, she is racist. To be honest I didn’t really thoroughly read the letter but whatever. I’m not buying the whole “every other race does this too!”….because they don’t. At least not in America and not to the degree that ghetto black men do.

    Maybe thats not politically correct to say but whatever. itsdatruth.

  • Isis

    I fear for them too. Mostly because the “men” get a pass from black women who should be raising them to be respectful. The women who give them passes make me more sick than the little boys they coddle. Black women are quick to be the guard dog for these “men” who could give a shit about them. Have some damn pride and self-love!

  • Patricia K

    @S.M.M

    Are you even a chick? Because when you state that only black men sexually harass me because I’m too ugly for white men, that seems like something a black man who hates black women would say. So black women are just so generally unattractive that only the best looking ones are worthy of a white man’s attention? Really?

    And the other subtext you have going on in your statement is that only “pretty” women can be sexually harrassed. Really? This reminds of those male cops and male judges back in the day suggesting to rape victims that they weren’t attractive enough to be raped, and casting doubt on the victim’s claim of sexual assault.

    If you’re not male, then you are male-identified without a doubt, and have really bought into the whole twisted, bogus, black male patriarchy construct that is killing black women and the black community.

    Take that ish somewhere else and sell it – I ain’t buying it.

  • Joan

    Wow. Some white women are so disgusted that black men will have the nerve to hit on them. Such breaking news. I mean, was this really worth an article? It’s not ground breaking news that advances (or perceived advances) from black men make many white women extremely uncomfortable. And yes, her message reeks of white skin privilege, but are we really surprised? At least she’s honest. And to be quite honest, black men need to hear it. I’ll bet that if these same men were NBA players yelling from limos, there would not even be a letter. Black men need to hear that, too.

  • Penny

    This letter is funny as hell to me because the men who are trying to holla at her probably think that getting her would be like getting a trophy. “If I can only get her down off of that pedestal…I will be the NIGGA.” Her repulsion quite likely only turns them on even more, thus making the possibility of attaining her (or any other white woman) even more of a prize worth pursuing. Sad. LOL.

    And I can understand why she would be repulsed. She lives in a society which puts her up on a pedestal and ingrains in her that black men are the lowest, scariest, most vile and untrustworthy of all men. She’s taught that she’s better than black women and that she is meant for white men…the best white man that she can get. So, the fact that these black men would have the audacity to act in ways that go against the rules shakes her to her very core. In her mind, somebody out there needs to straighten these confused black men out. LOL.

  • LA

    The college’s students rant was filled with racism, but it brings up a bigger issue. In my experience in Washington, DC both on and off campus, I can see with my own eyes that many black men feel a sense of entitlement to talk to any woman. Call it under some name, confidence, cockiness, whatever. It’s there.

  • passingthrough

    Everything you said.

    This is one of those fights which black women should sit out. No matter which side you are on you lose.

  • NOno

    i doubt a white woman wrote this.

    holler at
    spitting game
    smacking your lips would a white woman even say this? this letter seems more a black person trolling to me.

  • http://kinksandart.tumblr.com Paris

    @ Girl, very true! I have yet to notice the amount of disrespect Black men on the corners spew at Black women be directed towards White women. I live in a diverse neighborhood on the verge of gentrification and there are a lot of White people moving in near the same buildings that still house the “ghetto” people that was there 10 years ago when the neighborhood was bad. I walk by these guys and they holler and scream at me from across the street, while the White girl ahead of me gets no more than a passing glance. They are completely quiet when she walks by, looking damn near scared to death. I have noticed this on several occasions.

  • adriane stewart

    Certainly, while the language that this woman uses to express her rage is racist, I don’t believe she is off-base, at all. What she is noticing is that the Black community, like many other repressed communities, is misogynist. Debasing women, is a reflection of Black men’s own painful struggle to “feel okay.” It is an outward manifestation of their internal uncertainty in the face of female sexuality, presence and vulnerability. These Black men are not attracted to this woman necessarily. They are, in fact, angry. Period. Rage is expressed from male to female.

    Further, these guys are harrassing her because it is a dysfunctional part of Black American culture to call (“holla”) to women on the street in a subconscious effort to degrade, frighten and mock. It provides an outlet and a catharsis. It answers the question: “Do I exist? Can she see me? I am here! And, you are nothing! I am the boss here!” etc.. The logic here is to leverage your own peer group’s reaction (laughter, brinksmanship) or the fear of the woman (target) to boost one’s own low self-esteem. Where there is societal repression, men need to debase the women of the culture to feel whole, needed and “fine.”

    It is important to note that White men do the same thing in Italy, Spain, Brazil etc… — anywhere there is an intrinsic and deep down disrespect for women, men demomnstrate this behavior. This disrespect comes from an overall lack of education and an inability to cope or succeed within the prevailing society. The behavior is however, most remarkable here in the US, because of the original sexual taboos between Black men and White women.

    These guys who are harrassing this woman are probably too young to remember when crossing these taboos got you strung up from a tree, dragged through the streets and castrated.

    Either way, misogyny in the Black community has gained steam. The lifting of the cross-racial part of these taboos has unleashed this disrespect for women on other groups of women. It is a seeping disease.

    So, to this woman I say” “Welcome to the party! See what Black women have been forced to endure for years? Too bad so sad.” Add this dysfunctional and marginalized behavior on the part of Black men to the other pile of problems that we have in parts of our community that continue to keep us alienated and poverty-stricken both mentally and economically.

  • rosewater

    the dirty is absolutely disgusting…the writers andn especially the readers…very very racist and crude….so i’m not surprised…

  • SAA

    Okay so she is racist, I think that’s pretty much established but like I said that isn’t grounds to dismiss her experience. You’re right- she could have made her point without saying those things however those are the choice of words she chose to use. I too am more mad that when I experience these things that I comes from black men rather than them being a-holes simply because they sit there and act like stereotypical coons and they don’t realize it.

  • alyssa j.

    Damn. Good point!

  • alyssa j.

    Funny!!

  • convo_girl

    Enough BM harrass, stare and disrespect women of all races that needs to be ack’d as an issue. I’m not sure it’s just ghetto guys bc my niece says this happens in her college campus all the time.

    We all know this happens. We’ve sat back and seen some poor girl ripped to shreds bc she wasn’t interested in some guy. So, could the “good brothers” please put this on this list of things to address at the next meeting? Seriously, could the men (esp men in frats, churches and orgs that reach men) agree to take this on as a serious issue that they will try to impact some cultural change? Women who speak out on this are feminists. I know how we just looooooveee and respect them (sarcasm).

    Also, please let’s not play the blame BW game. I mean who raises their son thinking that they would ever street harass a woman? Gimme a break.

    Again, let’s stop being politically correct, dredging up history, and using deflecting technique such as everyone-else-does-it bull. Let’s just agree to do something. Google to find street harrassment orgs. Speak up at your church. Whatever. If everyone (but good men esp) took a stand, this dynamic would change.

  • Realist

    Okay, after reading (Thoroughly) the article and many of the comments, I have to say that: 1. The white woman in the article is clearly racist. She has absolutely NO experience of a “ghetto black man” hitting on her for her to say they have entitlement issues. She’s clearly speaking out of her arse. 2. The people who are agreeing with her saying Black men have entitlement issues to women of other races is offensive and wrong. I am a Black Man, and I ONLY feel entitled to women of my own race, Black Women. However, I do find women in general to be beautiful and whatever race they are, if I gel with them as a Person, then WE have an “entitlement” to be with each other if we so choose. (Entitlement-the fact of having a right to something).

    Now this “problem” isn’t an isolated phenomenon. This type of “problem” occurs in other races of men as well. I would say, men in general feel entitled to be with women in general, no matter what race it is. We’ve got to stop looking at this problem as a “black men only” thing and look at it as a “men in general” thing.

    To some of the commenters who have bashed black men for feeling entitled to women, I express my disappointment. It’s very depressing to see my own race of women bashing all black men for “problem” that is universal. All of us are not like those guys who were assholes to you. I for one can attest to this fact. For even more evidence, my girlfriend is Black. She herself thinks I’m amazing, and I’m not one to be arrogant, but i don’t disagree with her. In fact, I can’t. It’s just in my nature to be who I am, which is a strong black man standing up for what he believes and treating women how they are supposed to be treated. (Momma raised me well :D). Now let that mull in your consciousness for sometime before you decide to have this “all black men aren’t sh*t” mentality.

    To all the commenters who have defend this standpoint albeit it’s written differently or maybe even the same concept, keep up the good fight for our race of people. Until we can all band together as one race, the problems affecting all races, will continued to be amplified by our own ignorance.

  • convo_girl

    But, women, unlike men don’t have physical size or force. Women don’t have testosterone. Besides who cares what “other people’ do. What happened to respecting women? or do we not believe in that unless “other people” do that, too?

  • Bad

    …thank you!…that site is for wimpy white males who are mad because they can’t pull the ‘hot white chick’…and of course, the racism is big on there…

    …it’s the white males that talk that mess about the ‘purple crayon’, so i have reason to believe that this letter was written by a jealous white male…

    …not that i’m excusing the behavior of black men and how they approach women, especially non-black women…

  • ghosttown

    sorry but your fellow brothers are like this and it is real.. she is racist yes but i wouldn’t call what is happening to her a lie because more times than not we as women experience this. i dont think you understand the stress and fear that comes along with street and sexual harrassment… you may not be like this but they are. one day go somewhere sit down where traffic of walking people is prevalent (the mall? a subway station? bus stop? downtown) and observed..know that this is real

  • greyeyedgirl

    Patricia you aint neva lied, black men behavior has gotten to be downright disdainful; especially towards black women and they wonder why more are dating out. In looking at all of the hate anti-black women vids on youtube, it is clear that black men do have a sense of entitlement and foster such asinine notion that they are the only ones that can sexually please black women; when nothing could be further from the truth. I know for a fact that other men can and are capable of sexually pleasing black women WHILE loving and respecting us…my husband is white and he give me the goods all the time.

  • Kim

    I’m sure you’re great guy..but like many Black men(it seems) you are still missing the point.

    Its evident when you say this:
    “The people who are agreeing with her saying Black men have entitlement issues to women of other races is offensive and wrong. I am a Black Man, and I ONLY feel entitled to women of my own race, Black Women.”

    You really shouldn’t feel entitled to any woman period…except maybe your girlfriend. The issue is not that shes White…Many commenting are outraged at her racism, but they’re saying that they experience the same thing as Black women.

  • LemonNLime

    Please it isn’t 1465, you are NOT entitled to black women just because you are a black male. We are NOT just property that you have the right to clam. The fact that you would even say that is disgusting.

    And you don’t know whether she is real or not so you and all the people saying she’s real, whether she is or isn’t the problem. The problem is that fact that this happens to women black white or red EVERYDAY and yes most of time you can ignore it but there are also the times when it can turn violent. But I guess I supposed to just live with it when , black woman, is being verbal abused by a black man, after you feel like you are entitled to us.

    Disgusting…

  • greyeyedgirl

    I used to defend black men to whites but not anymore…why should I defend a man that harbors so much hatred and disdain towards me because i am a black woman? I will not contend with or defend any man that disrespects and hates me…nope will not do it…

  • Realist

    @ghosttown I never once denied the fact stuff like this happens. Honestly it makes me sick to be apart of a race of people where there are brothers who act like this. It pisses me off. My problem is with the writer of this article who obviously never had an experience of this magnitude. As she never even described one. She was clearly speaking from a racist standpoint and I believe that’s what most people are missing. Don’t get me wrong again, I def know stuff like this happens, just wondering why it takes someone who’s clearly racist, to say speak on it before everyone wants to jump on the bandwagon of “Oh that’s happened to me TOOOO!!!” :\

    @Kim I agree with you and now that I think about it, entitlement is the incorrect word to use in this situation. Obligation would be better. So to revise my statement, I am a Black Man, and I only feel Obligation to women of my own race, Black Women. Though I have the freedom/entitlement to be with whomever I want to be with.This statement is in NO way making women out to be objects of affection. As to the latter part of your comment, please refer to my above statement to ghosttown.

    @LemonNLime You’re right, and I apologize if I have offended you in anyway. I do however say that I’m obligated to black women BECAUSE I am a black male. In this case I’m obligated/entitled/privileged to my girlfriend (which to me, you seem to have completely overlooked this fact in an effort to call me disgusting).
    Also, it does matter if her account is a real account. No it doesn’t discredit factual evidence of this phenomenon happening, but it doesn’t make sense to me why so many of the Black women commenting are quick to throw “All” Black men under the bus due to a racist commentary made by a white woman who hasn’t once expressed her experience with said phenomenon. It just doesn’t make sense to me.

    The problems expressed in the letter we are all commenting on are real and happening everyday. My issue is with the women who are siding with a form of racism due to a commonality of issues. I pose the question, Is it okay for us to just look past the racial tone of this woman who APPARENTLY hasn’t had a run in with a black man who exhibits these attributes? It’s not adding up. IMO if a black woman posted this, I would be expressing my vehement anger towards those who would call that woman a “whore.”

  • Dre

    This letter was written by a white guy.

  • MayDay

    I’m sorry, but the minute I started reading this it sounded fake. She was so over-the-top and the minute she said “jungle juice” I was over it.

    Yes, there are black guys who have incredibly demeaning street behavior; I live in a predominantly white neighborhood and the road past my house goes into the city, so many black people drive past my street. It’s disgusting to walk past my street as a fourteen-year-old black female and have men sticking their heads out the window and yelling comments about my body that I don’t dare repeat.

    HOWEVER, there are PLENTY of white guys who do the same thing, just in a less obvious way at times. I’ve had a man drive slowly next to me, men yelling out disgusting things, and one man blew a kiss at me (not harassment, I know, but weird). The point is, I don’t focus on the race of the men who do nasty things when I’m trying to mind my own business on the road. I focus on what they are; nasty perverts.

  • LemonNLime

    Nope, I didn’t over look it. I have a problem to anyone saying they are entitled to any, it doesn’t matter if that entitlement is based on race or relationship status, I still have a problem with. The only thing you are entitled to are your basic rights as a human being.

    It didn’t take “clearly racist, to say speak on it before everyone wants to jump on the bandwagon of “Oh that’s happened to me TOOOO!!!”. There have been many articles on this website written by black women expressing their experiences with this very same behavior. On those article too, black women came out to talk about the negative experiences that they have suffered at the hands of these ignorant little boys. So this isn’t black women coming here just yelling, “Oh that’s happened to me TOOOO!!!” just so they can side with a racist. Black women are MORE than just black and our life experiences are also shaped by our gender/sex. The fact that you feel like you can dismiss the concern due to the fact that racist person brought it up, imo shows an example of the privileged you hold as a black male in this community – the privileged to ignore, dismiss, and invalidate (black) women’s issues because you don’t experience them or because they only affect half of the race.

    In the last several sentences of your response, you basically say, “Because this woman or man is a racist, you shouldn’t agree with her. Forget the fact that you experience the same verbal and sometimes physical harassment described in this this letter, you shouldn’t agree with this because you are black and it talks poor of black men. If this letter was written by a black women, then I would take her concerns into consideration because then it would be valid.”

    You say in your original post, “Until we can all band together as one race, the problems affecting all races, will continued to be amplified by our own ignorance.” This WILL NEVER happen if the male half of the race continues to participate in this verbal/physical harassment, ignore it, dismiss the experiences and opinions of black women, or in this case, find them to be invalid because the same concerns they share were brought up by a racist troll.

  • TheBestAnonEver, Part 2

    Is your ego that big you cannot imagine a woman wouldn’t want to be heckled? Is your need to maintain Mandigo status so important, you even want to claim a racist?

  • RealityCheck

    so, since all men do it, we won’t ever have articles calling black men out for street harrassament ever again, right ?

    i mean, that’s your excuse for this woman ……

  • LemonNLime

    One more thing.

    No woman wants to be with a man who feels like he is obligated to be with her because of her race or any other factor. Obligation meaning to be bonded legally or morally. We want partners who want to be with us because they CHOOSE to be with us, not because they feel obligated or have to be with us.

  • NOno

    ^ like^

  • greyeyedgirl

    Dre, oh god forbid, not all white women find you appealing…so now she is racist because she is not interested in you and your bullshit sense of entitlement?

  • greyeyedgirl

    Sorry d-chubb, don’t try to drag black women into this, she did not degrade black women but told the truth about black men.

  • gummybear

    @ Patrick K: I was FLASHED by an old white man when I was out with my mother that’s worse than harassment…that’s indecent exposure…so dont’ say it doesn’t happen

  • Realist

    @LemonNLime
    “Black women are MORE than just black and our life experiences are also shaped by our gender/sex. The fact that you feel like you can dismiss the concern due to the fact that racist person brought it up, imo shows an example of the privileged you hold as a black male in this community – the privileged to ignore, dismiss, and invalidate (black) women’s issues because you don’t experience them or because they only affect half of the race.”

    It is true that black women are more than just black, but your experiences are also shaped BECAUSE you are black. Of course gender plays an important role as well, but don’t dismiss how the color of your skin has played an important role in shaping your experiences. And though I respect your opinion, I totally disagree with it. The only privilege I hold in this community is the privilege of being black. The problems affecting one half of my race affect me as well. My reasoning for feeling this obligation towards women of my own race is because I’m sick of bullish situations like this crap happening. It pisses me off! Black women don’t deserve this type of treatment from Black men. In fact, NO WOMAN DOES! I’ve seen this crap happen many a times before and I hate it just as much as you do. So in no way am I dismissing the fact that it happens.
    Your interpretation of my last sentence couldn’t be further from the truth. I’m not saying don’t agree with her because she’s racist, and she talks about truth. What I am asking is why does it take someone who has NEVER experienced this, (key word “never”) and CLEARLY racist to point out our flaws? Why can’t we dismiss this post because of her mentality? You do know what’s happening in this post right? This was posted to get a reaction by using something that happens universally (but NEVER happened to the writer) sullying it with racial tones, and put up on a site where there’s sure to be a lot of black women (i.e. The Dirty). The woman who posted this on this site (clutchmagazineonline) even said it herself “its yet another unfortunate reminder of the glory of post-racial America. It’s amazing that those who have not suffered the transgressions of racism are still so filled with anger and hatred.” I’m sure you can feel the effects of racism, classism, sexism, marxism, etc. in this post just as much as I do. I find a serious problem with that. We are clearly looking past a more pressing issue. Again, I’m in no way saying dismiss the “problem”, I’m saying find fault with the racial tone and be adamantly angry with that.

    To the latter part of your post, , this will also never happen if both parties don’t get their act together. It’s not just one sided. A lot of women have degraded men, treated men like dogs and to top it off, I’ve even SEEN women willingly DATE the SAME men they call an A**hole, because they found him to be more attractive than the guy who was there for her and treated her like a queen (i.e. her best friend usually). Of course this is a different conversation and in no way am I saying you are like this, I’m just saying it’s not just one sided. So again I state, until we can band together as one race, the “problems” affecting all races will be amplified by our own ignorance.
    And to your second post, I pose this question, Why aren’t we as a community banded together to preserve each other? This is where my sense of obligation comes from. I know that I can CHOOSE to be with whomever I want, and I CHOOSE to be with a black woman (i.e my girlfriend) because I WANT to. But I feel obligated (in the moral sense) to be with a black woman. I understand the history of struggle for black women, and just women period. I understand how women were made to feel lower than men and placed in subordinate positions. Get used for sexual pleasure and glorified incubators. It’s sickening! I know that’s not how God wants it to be. Women AND Men are meant to walk side by side as equals. And this is what I’m also fighting for. However, I don’t believe we need a racist telling us this.

  • Realist

    @LemonNLime I understand how you have a problem with the word entitlement, but let me ask a question, Are not people entitled to be with whomever they want to be with? Isn’t that a right?
    “It didn’t take “clearly racist, to say speak on it before everyone wants to jump on the bandwagon of “Oh that’s happened to me TOOOO!!!”. There have been many articles on this website written by black women expressing their experiences with this very same behavior. On those article too, black women came out to talk about the negative experiences that they have suffered at the hands of these ignorant little boys. So this isn’t black women coming here just yelling, “Oh that’s happened to me TOOOO!!!” just so they can side with a racist. Black women are MORE than just black and our life experiences are also shaped by our gender/sex. The fact that you feel like you can dismiss the concern due to the fact that racist person brought it up, imo shows an example of the privileged you hold as a black male in this community – the privileged to ignore, dismiss, and invalidate (black) women’s issues because you don’t experience them or because they only affect half of the race.”

    Okay, I’ll take your word of it being true black women have expressed their concerns with this issue. I have a BIG issue as this why this post is getting so much attention. Reason being is this post is CLEARLY written to get a response. I’m denying the validity of this post because of simple yet complex struggles: racism, classism, sexism, and in some ways Marxism. This white woman is clearly upset about a situation that has never happened to her. Some examples:

    “It makes me absolutely sick to my stomach the way that thuggish and to be honest ghetto black guys feel entitled and holler at white girls.”

    “I go to a school in a coastal city, and I can’t even walk from my car to a building without feeling like some f*cking black dude is going to harass me.” (key word is “going”)

    “Are there seriously attractive white girls who give into this sh*t? Where do they live?”

    “So I just wanted to make a public service announcement…. If you are a f*cking ghetto ass dude and you think that smacking your lips and spitting game at me is going to get your nasty *ss purple crayon in this– you are crazy.”

    Can you honestly tell me this girl has had an experience? Her concern is coming from a PURELY racial standpoint and not from any kind of experience. It isn’t like this girl is traumatized by this and is expressing it. She’s being racist, plain and simple. The “problems” she is expressing however, is a different issue. For one I don’t feel any other privilege in my race than being Black. I have just as many problems as you do. Black men are the target of a lot of problems. We are traumatized just as much as women are. It pains me to say it, but black men need help. So when you say I feel “the privilege to ignore, dismiss, and invalidate (black) women’s issues because you don’t experience them or because they only affect half of the race”, I take offense to that. I don’t ignore, invalidate or dismiss (black) women’s issues, I experience the effects of them just like you. Albeit it’s not the same effect, I do feel them. It hurts me to see that. I hate it. I want it to stop and go away. This is where My only reason for obligation comes in. It pisses me off to see my “brothers” do this to my “sisters.” It makes me wonder why the h*ll would anyone want to abuse something so precious? So don’t get me wrong, I’m not denying the fact that this happens.
    And I still stand by my statement, “Until we can all band together as one race, the problems affecting all races, will continued to be amplified by our own ignorance.” These issues aren’t just one sided. Women have degraded men too. By calling us dogs, treating us like animals, and not only that having this “all men ain’t sh*t” creating an ultimatum against men. Yet they still decide to date these men because they are more “attracted” to them. Not saying you are like this, but there are some women who are. So both sides have issues to work out, and I believe it starts with the men, but we need help. And the best candidates to help us are Black women. Another reason I feel obligated to be with a black woman. No one understands our struggles more than our own people.

    Lastly, I’m not just with my girlfriend just out of obligation, I’m with her first and foremost because I CHOSE to be with her. She was best for me and I for her.

  • rosewater

    bad, you’re right….it was probably written by a white guy…..i don’t know i really feel our society is going down the crapper…it’s not just the racism that they exhibit so proudly there it’s just contempt and despicable discrimination against almost every group they have….it’s actually scary…

  • perri

    “Purple crayon”. Really?

  • http://www.annaleishamae.tumblr.com annaleisha

    Excellent comment. Words can’t really explain how wonderful and thorough that comment was. Especially the psychological breakdown part. Wow! Spot on.

  • Realist

    Exactly.

  • sunshyne84

    Poor little white girl.

  • yoli bee

    I agree. I was actually discussing this with my friend yesterday (he is a black male) over lunch. It is NOT ok to “flirt” with me by going, “aye, aye baby!” or “what’s up lil mama” or “where you going, can i walk with you?” it is NOT ok to approach me like i’m a piece of meat or harass me after i tell you, “no, thank you.” it is NOT ok to follow me or repeatedly harass me on the street/ask me out every time you see me, after i’ve told you multiple times that i have a boyfriend. i’ve noticed that only THUGGISH BLACK MEN do this.

    My friend says guys like that make it harder for guys like him, because women are so used to being approached inappropriately, that when he’s like, “hi, how are you?” they’re already in defense mode. I’ve told my boyfriend stories about waiting on the bus and having some thug ask if he could see my feet and kiss and lick them, all while I’m trying to be as civil as possible to not get hurt. I have to smile and be nice while being harassed, and it is NOT ok.

    However, her “purple crayon” remark was undoubtedly racist, imo.

  • yoli bee

    @JS – excellent comment, and i agree.

  • yoli bee

    Ugh, yes.

  • yoli bee

    My boyfriend is white, and I’ve been APPROACHED by white men, but never HARASSED–there is a difference. I guess I’m just “too unattractive” for them to be vulgar and disgusting about it.

    WTF.

  • S.M.M

    @ Patricia K: Since you insist on being disrespectful…No, TRICK, I am not a chick. I am a grown woman.

    My response to your statement is just that, a response to YOUR statement. No where
    do I indict or implicate an entire group of people. The fact that you would try to extrapolate my statement about “your experience” onto Black women as a whole is a measure of your lack of integrity and a justification for your demeaning and dismissive comment about the sexual harassment that I and others have experienced by White males.

    Male identified? Casting doubt? Black women generally unattractive?

    Err, no…You are projecting. Since you apparently have selective amnesia, let me repost your comment to myself and others who pointed out that sexual harassment is not an exclusive Black male pathology or phenomena:

    “First of all, I don’t believe these comments saying these sistas have gotten sexually harrassed by white men the same way that black guys harrass them. Just miss me with that, k? I used to live in the hood and now I live in a mostly white area and that kind of ish never happens with white guys, asian guys, or hispanic guys”.

    It’s your comment that reveals itself to be White male identified and in perfect synchronicity with the existing White supremacist patriarchal ideology. As you flat out state your disbelief that “sistas” (Black women as group) have not been and could not be sexually harassed by White men (or any other group). Despite the comments of myself and others indicating otherwise, I’m not even going to get into all the historic or genetic evidence. Your attack reveals that you are NO ally of Black women. You are just posturing.

    So please, save your sanctimonious, self-serving, pseudo-analysis for those who attended Bobo the clown academy with you.

    Your comment to me and others clearly exposes your hatred and disdain for both Black women and men at large.

  • Nzinga

    I agree with you. The letter is a fake.

  • Xaviar

    Yep. Whiteboy wrote it.

  • http://vixen-divinnnalafeme.blogspot.com JUST MY THOUGHT’S

    How fine is this girl that she has been approached by so many black men(sarcasm) that she needed to write a damn letter cause I am having a hard time believing this. I mean who hasn’t had this problem this is not a black issue it is an international issue meaning all men do it and all women have experienced it, I also think this letter is bait for a deeper issue that this person is having which I believe is an issue with inter-racial dating and I also agree with someone when they said it was probably written by a white man and a racist one at that because some of this is downright offensive. And like it is basically saying that she isn’t offended by men trying to get at her she is only offended by black men trying to get at her and anyone on this site co-signing this bullshit needs their head examined.

  • http://twitter.com/kjnetic Agent P

    from one BM to another…

    you..we..are the exceptions to thier rule.

    just like white men are X…WW are Y…and BW are Z (despite protestations of “uniqueness” and “not being a monolith”)

    congrats on what you do, continue to do what you do, but keep in mind that to an increasing number of bw…we are the enemy, we ain’t s***. if you see a BF with this mindset, react accordingly.

  • NTG

    @BestAnon

    I hope you are not supporting this white women, whether she was real or not. If she feels this way about black men, she most certainly feels the exact same about black women. LOL

  • Brodie

    @NTG Black women aren’t looking to have sexual relations with the writer of the letter so what this white woman thinks shouldn’t matter right?

    Any other conversation where black men/white women is discussed, what white women think of black women is irrelevant to black men, don’t change the rules now because its convenient.

    Cosign BestAnon. If a black woman even suggested that negative comments about black women made under the avatar of a white men could possibly be a white female or even a black man you’d call her “delusional” or “out of touch” with reality.

  • damidwif

    “Also, please let’s not play the blame BW game. I mean who raises their son thinking that they would ever street harass a woman? Gimme a break.”

    this right here!

  • Are You Serious Bro

    How in the world did I miss this article and story? That letter takes trolling to a new level.

  • Kim

    Well said.

  • didi

    honestly, there are racial undertones but she is really hitting on a larger issues with WOMEN and a particular brand of disrespect that has been normalized amongst some black men. I am from Philly and from the time I was 11/12…walking past a group of guys young and old meant I would be street harassed. It just so happens they are not just targeting us black and brown girls any more…

  • http://commentarybyval.blogspot.com/ Val

    This letter is soooo phony!

  • Michelle

    This is no surprise. Isn’t rape a part of African culture?

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