Every once in a while social media–Twitter in particular–goes through an episode of “when keeping it real goes wrong” where individuals decide to add fuel to fire on issues or topics that don’t require such nonsense or hysterics.
This week many, but not all, black women on Twitter were in an uproar and placed Idris Elba’s dating preference under a microscope upon hearing news of him dating a white woman. Girl, what?
Timelines were flooded with negative comments on his decisions and questions of “Why?” The ridiculous feedback surrounding the news reached entirely new levels of ignorance. Even men were baffled that so many women had such an issue with Idris dating someone outside of his race.
What value does it add to anyone’s life of who this man chooses to date? It seems as though some women are constantly getting upset over a man dating a woman outside of his race as if it in someway affects their lives or validates their well-being. It doesn’t. To be clear – no one should be criticized or scrutinized for choosing to be involved in an interracial relationship with someone whom they have a deep connection. Just because you may be unwilling to explore dating someone who isn’t the same shade as you doesn’t mean anyone else should hold the same value. Love has no boundaries and it is certainly not subjected by color.
Now, there’s a fine line between choosing to date outside your race because that’s your personal preference and just outright bashing people of your same racial background. For example Isaiah Mustafa, the actor from the Old Spice commercial, made the self-hate filled comment recently about him desiring to have a woman and kids with “good hair” because his hair was “nappy.” Not that there’s any one specific type of hair that’s “good” hair, but his comments were ignorant and clearly targeting Black women. Obviously this wasn’t the case this week as Idris has never made comments publically bashing women of any race (and even tweeted to fans not to believe ‘the rumors’). People were clearly investing too much time into this man’s life. Yes, Idris is fine and I, for one, would date him in a New York minute if given the chance. But to criticize him and his new girlfriend for having a relationship? Absurd.
If you don’t like or allow anyone else’s comments or opinions to influence who you choose to date, you shouldn’t do it to anyone else.
Since when was love a color? If men rarely get upset at a women for choosing to date outside her own race, why should you?