Could A Regular Guy Date the Ladies of “Love & Hip Hop”?
I’ve never been one for reality television. If given choice between an expertly produced serial drama, a smartly written situation comedy and a reality train wreck, I’m always going to choose one of the former. This is why I can’t figure out how I’ve found myself so engrossed in VH1′s Love and Hip-Hop. The random, annoyingly interjected Jim Jones video aside, the show does a good job portraying the lives of six city women who are not unlike some of the women I know in my personal life (o.k. I don’t really know anyone quite like Somaya, but who does?).
A big part of the show centers around the love lives, or lack of love lives, of these women and the drama that goes along with being semi-famous and in love with someone who is a little more semi-famous. Each week as I’m watching, I always find myself wondering if I could make a long term, serious romantic relationship work with any of these women. Now, obviously, I don’t really know them so it’s impossible to truly pass judgment on them. But after much thought and deliberation, I’ve come to some conclusions about each of the ladies and thought it would be a fun exercise to share.
Let’s start with the least compatible of the bunch:
Kimbella Vanderhee
The biggest loser on this entire show is a guy who hasn’t appeared in a single episode: Juelz Santana. One of the ways guys tend to judge each other is by how the woman the guy choses to be with comports herself. If you judge Juelz by this standard it’s hard to have any respect for him. Before the first episode was over we found out that Kimbella has no concept of “dressing for the occasion,” has no idea of when it’s appropriate to make startling revelations, and she’d had what amounted to a one night stand with Fabolous (Emily’s longtime beaux and child’s father). All of this in the first episode. And I know it’s shallow, but no matter how serious and right she might be in particular situation, she always sounds silly; silly in a way that makes it impossible for you to take her seriously. A relationship with her could never work.
Somaya Reece
The next least compatible person on the show has to be Somaya Reece. Let me say this, there is something respectable about Somaya’s ambition and determination. She’s clearly someone who’s been through a lot and is working hard to make something of herself despite it all. That’s commendable. So while I respect her hustle, there are just way too many red flags to ever attempt to make a serious relationship work with her. In last week’s episode she went on what seemed to be a first date with one of the producers from Midi Mafia. Before their food even arrived she was in tears discussing her life’s trauma. I understand we all go through things, but if the stuff you’ve gone through is so present and unresolved in your mind that you’re breaking down in tears on a first date – we’re probably not gonna work in the long run. Also, as a regular guy, I just don’t think I’d be able to put up with her desire to be a rapper. That sounds terrible, but I can’t see myself dating any sort of rapper – especially an aspiring one.
Olivia Longott
Whenever Oliva accepts the fact that being a superstar is just not in the cards, I’m sure she’ll find success at whatever she does next, and will probably be a nice catch for some lucky guy. But right now, the entitled, ‘woe-is-me’ way she approaches her music career is a major turnoff. Add to that the fact that she’s kinda boring, has a weird style, and doesn’t seem to have much of a life story, and it’s hard to see how I could ever really make it work with her. During last weeks episode where she confided in Yandy the teary-eyed story about how her mom used to write her letters, I found myself wondering what could possibly be going on in her mind … and I couldn’t come up with anything.
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I don’t watch the show, so I have no intriguing thoughts on the women of the show. Well, based on what I have read and hear about these women, I know that they are women who I could never be friends with. I don’t have a son and my brother (half) is only 11-years-old. I don’t have a best guy friend either.
My thoughts about each of the characters:
Chrissy Lampkin: Career girlfriend whose job it is to beat down other women who look at her man?! (he ain’t the bizz, but whatev!)
Emily: Babymama for life without a spine
Yandy: Who is she?! I don’t know her!
Somaya Reece: ghetto barbie doll with absolutely no talent!
Olivia: Trophy girlfriend who can sing, if ONLY and ONLY if she gets a new manager that does NOT shed tears for not inking her a deal…I HATE her manager…he is such a wuss!
Kimbella…Pretty girl with absolutely no career!
I would not gift none of them to anybody on this green earth! They have absolutely nothing going on for them, other than drama. I need to see BRAINS at work! Not bras and panties.
“Chrissy Lampkin: Career girlfriend whose job it is to beat down other women who look at her man?! (he ain’t the bizz, but whatev!)”
@African Mami
Can you blame her? That man is her meal ticket.
I just started watching the show this season, like literally last week. My friend has the episodes on DVR. If you ask me, the most annoying person on that show isn’t Kimbella or Yandy, it’s Chrissy. Now, Kimbella’s confession to Emily was ill timed, but based on the episode that I just saw (last week episode) where Kimbella threw the party for Emily, Kimbella at least seems like she’s trying to atone. For Chrissy to still be trying to beef with Kimbella after she and Emily have moved on is really ridiculous. Personally, I think Chrissy’s jealous of Kimbella because there’s genuine interest in her outside of Juelz, whereas Chrissy’s place in hip-hoppia is completely, completely dependent upon how long she can maintain her status as Jim’s girl. I also found Chrissy’s run in with Yandy outside the club, after Somaya’s show, to be really stupid as well. Chrissy is not Yandy’s client, Jim is, so why is her behavior tolerated? Is being chewed out by your client’s girlfriend part of being a manager? Even Jim was all, “You and Chrissy need to get along.” Um, no they don’t because Yandy doesn’t work for Chrissy.
@African Mami and isolde: YESSSS!!!! Like Mr. Spradley, I don’t watch much reality tv, hell I don’t even own a tv but somehow I found myself on vh1.com watching the show and its like a trainwreck- its so bad you wanna turn away but somehow just can’t!!
Chrissy is by far the most undesirable character on the show. The things that come out of her mouth and her actions make me cringe and I can’t help but feel like I’m watching some ghetto high school drama unfold. She’s loud, uncouth, mean, a bully, sounds stupid and perhaps worst of all has no career/job/ambition of her own to speak of. I’ll tell you one thing though- makeup and a girdle work MIRACLES on her! She is not someone I would ever befriend in a million years or would want my brothers dating.
I almost feel like when she’s around the other girls she feels somewhat insecure because each of them, as retarded as they may be in their own respective ways, has something going for them and they’re all prettier than her for the most part.
The only girl I’ve heard of before this show is Olivia – who I was surprised could actually SING!
Now if she took the next best step and went independent….
*seeingpossibilyinthecrystalball*
lol!
Everyone else is just funny and sad.
@ SAA,
Honestly speaking, beauty is in the eye of the beholder because I find Chrissy to be VERY VERY pretty, LOVES her mole!
@African Mami: I don’t mind the mole- it’s fitting on her because she’s a little witch. Haha jk that’s taking it way too far!!
@African Mami
I agree, except I like Emily. She seems like a sweet girl too me.
@ mahagony,
Girrrrrrrrrrl….that chile and her sweetness can go hang. She is annoying! One time she is throwing an independence party, the next she is still clinging to ol boi?! What gives?! She is THIRSTY!
excuse me
*seeingpossibilityinthecrystalball*
I liked Chrissy last season but cant stand her now. Punching Kimbella was uncalled for. Kimbella seems really sweet to me. I could be friends with her.
I never cared much for Chrissy, too pushy and rude for my liking but when she attacked Kimbella that left that left a permanent bad taste in my mouth toward her. What shocked me was people defending, condoning and applauding what she did. In what universe is it okay to strike someone when what was said didn’t even involve you. Lets get away from that “loyalty” nonsense and call it what it really was- unwarranted childish behavior for someone who claims to be a “grown woman”.
I liked Chrissy last season too! But this season she seems to be over the top with her attitude. Fighting her friend’s battles and getting angry with Yandy because Yandy wants to make money…is just a bit much. She seems like the bully of the group now..and it’s not cute. Somebody likes it so hey. I feel like she wants to manage Jim Jones and take over, lol!
I love Chrissy! I would welcome her into my family with open arms. She’s smart, honest, emotional and fiercely loyal and I identify with her the most. Of course being super emotional has it’s drawbacks, but it makes her real.
Kimbella is a messy ditz who looks and sounds dumb in every situation. She gets on my nerves and reminds me of the fast girls in high school that took advantage of my brother and eventually broke his heart. She’s my worst nightmare when it comes to the men in my family. lol
Team Chrissy!!! Of course, Chrissy shouldn’t have hit that ditz, but hey…
Chrissy would NOT be accepted in my family. She is a huge liability. Forget maintaining any social capital or network, she doesn’t have the poise. She isn’t ghetto but she also doesn’t understand “right place, right time” either. I don’t know how violence is handled on the show legally, but she should have been sued.
No poise
No manners
No self-control
No restraint
Wait……that sounds pretty hood to me.
@ fuschia,
Chrissy is smart?! How is being a career girlfriend smart?! How is hanging on to a man smart?! What she is, ghetto fab!
agree 100% loooooove Chrissy!
I agree with everything stated but you missed Emily’s insecurities. If it shows outside of her relationship I’m sure it comes out in their relationship which I hear they’re back together now.
Of course you like Emiliy… She is the weakest of all. I’m partially joking, but to stay with a man that doesn’t acknowledge your existance… Yikes!
I’ve met Chrissy in person and 1. She is beautiful. The camera does not do her justice 2. She isn’t that “angry” in real life. Let’s not forget this is a TV show, and producers/viewers like drama. 3. Loyalty… An important part of any relationship… Chrissy has got loyalty.
Kimbella… smh I just don’t understand her, what an airhead.
Wouldn’t wish these women on my worst enemies………let me stop yes I would.
@Clnmike
Not to worry! Your worst enemies likely wouldnt stand a chance anyhow. I sincerely doubt any of these women would even waste 5 minutes of their time with a “regular guy.” They all seem to desperately need the money and the spotlight.
I totally agree with the writers rundown of the women on the show. I do like Chrissy… as for the punch, ummm hello?! It’s scripted! Kimbella is an airhead. Emily seems sweet. Somaya is whatever. Olivia is annoying.
Mr. Spadley was on point with Yandy. This girl is from a good home and college educated. Her “homegirl act” is so phony and uncalled for. You can be a business woman and manage rappers without the forced hoodrat mannerisms.
Tonight’s episode will feature the sammyb (samantha black) fashion show!! Can’t wait.
I actually like all except Olivia, there is something about her I don’t like, I believe she’s just jealous of Somaya’s warrior attitude.
I like Yandy because she doesn’t hide the fact that she likes money and is working for it. I see nothing wrong with acknowledging that.
Kimbella, yes she’s missing something in her little head, but I could be friends with her.
Chrissy, she seems very angry and frustrated and releases that anger on others, not good, but she can work on that.
Emily, she’s sweet, a little week, but she’s working on that according to the show.
Somaya to me is a warrior, she’s fighting for what she wants, I don’t like her voice, but she obvioulsy has something because the producer and investor are willing to spend time and money on her.
I meant to say Emily is “weak”
There is something about Olivia that I don’t like. Something I can’t put my finger on. Maybe other people see it which is why her singing career can’t seem to take off?
For the first time ever…. I dont agree with clutch here. I love Yandy! maybe cause Im corney too and I hate Chrisy. Somaya is a hot mess!
African Mami i agree. what does she do exactly at least the rest of them have jobs, she is not even a stay at home wife. At least emily does something.
I still like Chrissy, Olivia and Somaya
Emily seems like one of those girls who just don’t want to give up the “life” she has a son with a rapper…type stuff…lol She’s not really looking for a meaningful relationship…yet… she’s uses that to keep O’Boy around. Cause if a guy haven’t claimed you in eight years…LMAO who allows that? exactly
Yandy is cool…she needs to learn to keep her comments to herself …cause she’s mixing friendship with business…you can’t piss people off you re doing business with.
Kimbella Why is any man claiming that at his woman? Wow….she comes off Bimbo ish
to me and that’s not cute…sorry I wouldn’t want my nephew or son coming home with that…eeeeeeevvvvvvver!
Alright, first off kudos to Clutch for having some male writers. It’s a refreshing addition to the blogosphere girly banter. Ok and second, as much as I love a melodrama, especially featuring stylish beautiful black women Love and Hip Hop is one of those guilty pleasures that leaves me with a headache the next day. Like too much wine or too many chocolates. I love the fact that the author wants to give props and/or give a personal critique but honey these girls are ACTING! And badly I might add. There are other reality shows that are clearly scripted (cough The Kardashians cough cough) but I mean at least theyre executed with some type of believability or at least enthusiasm. Somaya’s my fav as a woman, yeah she’s emotionally not in a space to really be dating but at least she’s the only one I can see who’s made any personal and professional growth since last season. Chrissy is clearly your favorite bro, but I garuntee you that loyalty would wear thin if Jim Jones didn’t keep her Gucci’d and Fendi’d up. She insecure in a lot of ways that makes her emotionally agressive. That is NOT appealing at all. And she still seems not to understand that a man (and I use that term loosely) like Jim Jones is not going to make her his wife when there are family tensions that run as deep as they do. And also why buy the cow if the milk is free and buying YOU diamond engagement rings???*I think the authors lil crush clouded his judment about her persuasion cabilities cuz what does she do exactly and how is that persusion evident in her relationship with a man shes been with for six years unmarried?* Olivia is not just boring but arrogant and shallow. That ‘tude is why she hasn’t made it big…she’s mediocre and her attitude sucks. Kimbella is a hoe who got lucky. There’s a million hers at clubs around the country she just happened to be one of the few who actually got pregnant by a guy who didn’t pay her off to stay silent and/or dissapear. Yandy is probably gay…I just get that vibe from her. As for Em B., I like her too, or at least I wanna like her…but she seems to have deep seated issues with valuing herself. She seems not to really want to break free from the prescribed role as wifey. Jus from an expenses point of view no regular guy could really deal with these women. Outside of Somaya Olivia and Yandy each have displayed they dont know their worth and will deal with a good amount of bs to maintain the lifestyle to which they’ve grown accustomed. None are great catches IMO. And btw they are all about the same body type, thick all over they look like every other stripper Ive encountered in ATL. All in all they make for great TV jus dont start looking them up for dates based on what you’ve seen on the show.
Alright, first off kudos to Clutch for having some male writers. It’s a refreshing addition to the blogosphere girly banter. Ok and second, as much as I love a melodrama, especially featuring stylish beautiful black women Love and Hip Hop is one of those guilty pleasures that leaves me with a headache the next day. Like too much wine or too many chocolates. I love the fact that the author wants to give props and/or give a personal critique but honey these girls are ACTING! And badly I might add. There are other reality shows that are clearly scripted (cough The Kardashians cough cough) but I mean at least theyre executed with some type of believability or at least enthusiasm. Somaya’s my fav as a woman, yeah she’s emotionally not in a space to really be dating but at least she’s the only one I can see who’s made any personal and professional growth since last season.
Chrissy is clearly your favorite bro, but I garuntee you that loyalty would wear thin if Jim Jones didn’t keep her Gucci’d and Fendi’d up. She’s insecure in a lot of ways that makes her emotionally agressive. That is NOT appealing at all. And she still seems not to understand that a man (and I use that term loosely) like Jim Jones is not going to make her his wife when there are family tensions that run as deep as they do. And also why buy the cow if the milk is free and buying YOU diamond engagement rings???*I think the authors lil crush clouded his judment about her persuasion cabilities cuz what does she do exactly and how is that persusion evident in her relationship with a man shes been with for six years unmarried?*
Olivia is not just boring but arrogant and shallow. That ‘tude is why she hasn’t made it big…she’s mediocre and her attitude sucks. Kimbella is a hoe who got lucky. There’s a million hers at clubs around the country, she just happened to be one of the few who actually got pregnant by a guy who didn’t pay her off to stay silent and/or dissapear. Yandy is probably gay…I just get that vibe from her. As for Em B., I like her too, or at least I wanna like her…but she seems to have deep seated issues with valuing herself. She seems not to really want to break free from the prescribed role as wifey.
Jus from an expenses point of view no regular guy could really deal with these women. Outside of Somaya, Olivia and Yandy each have displayed that they dont know their worth and will deal with a good amount of bs to maintain the lifestyle to which they’ve grown accustomed. None are great catches IMO. And btw they are all about the same body type, thick all over they look like every other stripper Ive encountered in ATL. All in all they make for great TV jus dont start looking them up for dates based on what you’ve seen on the show.
Kimbella- The hottest mess. I don’t find her attractive, She is yet another racially ambiguous looking woman seeking to capitalize off of “sex!” Much like Emily said, “she is one of many!”
Somaya- Other than the fact that she has the build of a linebacker and seems a little bit mentally unstable, can’t rap/sing/or dance, she seems like a really sweet girl.
Olivia- Never realized how gorgeous she was until the show but seems really jealous and stuck in that mean girl high school mentality.
Yandy- Would be pretty if she took out those colored contacts. I don’t appreciate how she talks big stuff and then breaks down, cries, and is readily defending herself when confronted.
Chrissy- I haven’t quite decided how I feel about her yet. On the one hand, I appreciate her loyalty but proposing to a man??? I think she is obsessed with Jim and doesn’t have a life or goals of her own.
Emily- I like her but she needs a dose of self-respect.