There are so many unjustified assumptions about polyamory that come from a place of misunderstanding and cultural conditioning. In the United States, monogamy is upheld as the perfect norm, as having more than one partner is often met with negative commentary, slut shaming, and the label of promiscuity. It is through this lens that the idea of one partner being able to fulfill all your needs is spread amongst children, youth, and adults. And though there are couples that have successfully practiced monogamy, polyamorous couples have also experienced success and longevity in both emotional fulfillment and sexual health.

Contrary to popular belief, it is rare for any relationship to be completely monogamous. The rates of cheating amongst “monogamists” continue to skyrocket, and it seems that people are running from the idea that polyamory is also a productive alternative for love. But non-monogamy and polyamory are not one in the same, as polyamory is rooted in the philosophy of honesty and transparency in all acts of love, sex included. It is not free love without rules. It’s a system in which people make agreements to accommodate loving more than one person to keep everyone safe and happy.

There are various classifications that describe the many types of relationships practiced by polyamorists. There are primary relationships, which include people that you live with in marriage-like arrangements. There are secondary relationships, which include people that you love but with whom you don’t live. And there are tertiary relationships, which include people with whom you enjoy sex but don’t necessarily love.

Read the Rest over at Frugivore

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  • B

    I read this article earlier on Frugivore and thought it was a pretty good article. Although, I’d make one correction: there’s no such thing really as “safe sex” only “safer sex.”

    • Timcampi

      @B

      I totally agree with you.

      Speaking on the article– I once met a guy who was into cuckolding. This would be somewhere in his alley.

  • Polyamory has it’s ups and downs like any other relationship model out there. If anything it’s another option, and from the sound of articles like this …a viable one. I worry though, if this is one of those situations where a platform looks better on paper than in reality. I’ll say this much. If it can work, I could easily see polyamory being more recognized in the near future.

  • Gam

    I guess my main concern or issue is that sex is placed on such a pedestal, it’s ridiculous.

  • Jen

    Honestly, as bad as it sounds, I would rather be cheated on! A one-nighter in which my man feels extreme remorse and goes to great lengths in discretion sounds infinitely less mortifying than him actually falling in love with the other girl and flaunting it in my face. Just sayin’.

  • Jasmine

    My husband and I are in a fidelitious relationship with two people who we very much love. The four of us are faithful to each other, and we have been together as a group (called a quad) for almost a year now. Two months to go. :) It can work wonderfully, if it is what everyone involved wants. Just wanted to add a personal testimonial. It can work. I promise. Whether it is what you want, or your partner(s) want is another story.

    The most important thing is communication, always. Keeping things to yourself will tear a poly relationship apart. The same is true of a mono relationship a lot of the time, but when you’re poly there are more people, so more chances for misunderstandings. You gotta speak up, and make sure you’re understood while also listening to the others.