With a hit film, new album and a baby in tow, it’s easy to imagine that life for Robin Thicke and wife Paula Patton is full of excitement, and a fair share of stress. The release of his 5th album, Love After War, demonstrates that Robin continues to draw from his 18-year old relationship with Paula to compose some of his most compelling work. In a recent interview with Essence, Thicke spoke pretty candidly about Paula’s impact on his life, and the impact he seeks to make on Paula – in the bedroom. He shared his thoughts on being a part of an interracial family, and explains why White men may not be the ideal “fall-back” for Black women (who’ve had enuff).
When asked If someone saw him whispering in Paula’s ear, what would he most likely be saying: ‘I can’t wait to get you home and love you up for two to three hours.’ I like to try to get her into double-digit orgasms as much as possible. It doesn’t happen all the time, but when I’ve got my mojo and my swag, it happens. Every few months it’s just like bam — repeated. Repeated! I like her to just be going crazy in the bedroom.
On Paula’s sexiest quality, the singer admitted: It’s her intelligence and her strength. I’ve never met a stronger person who stands by their will and their moral values. She is such an amazing human being. Ever since I met her and we were 16 years old and she was the president of the Black student union and I was just a silly White boy who didn’t understand or have compassion.
I had no animosity, but I just didn’t understand the Black experience in America and how different it is — and most White people can’t. You can’t understand it until you are with somebody every day and you have a child that you know is Black, you then understand that, wow, what a different experience Black people and in particular Black women have to go through.
I have a song on my new album called, “I Don’t Know How It Feels to Be You,” and she and I were in the middle of an argument and she said, “Robin, no matter how hard you try, or how compassionate you are, you’ll never know what it’s like to be a Black woman.” So I got up and I wrote this song in five minutes. The lyrics are: “I don’t know how it feels to by you, though I try my best to understand what you’re going through, I don’t know how it feels to be you. I can’t walk in your shoes. But, I’m trying baby. You know how much I love you.”
On making influential music & his aversion to White women: It’s actually the best thing. It’s nice if you can make someone drop it like it’s hot, or pop a bottle. But we’re always dropping it and popping it. What I realize about the difference between me and my peers — you know, Chris Brown and Drizzy Drake and all my musical peers — is that they haven’t been with the same woman for 18 years and I’ve been with a Black woman for 18 years. I’ve never dated a White woman. Don’t want to. I’ve never been on a date with a White woman. When you have that relationship and that means the most to you — you know I can’t live without that woman, she is my muse, my best friend, and my creative partner. I didn’t have a great relationship with my mom and she didn’t have a great relationship with her dad and we became that for each other. She’s my mama and I’m her daddy. I even call her mama and she calls me daddy. We are that to each other.
Regarding Black Men, Robin was asked: The media often tells Black women that they’re better off dating White guys. What’s your response to that? I think that’s ridiculous. There are so many good Black men out there that are hardworking, decent, and handsome, you know? To start that rumor is as bad as starting any other negative rumor. There are great Black men out there. There are only a few good White men — trust me. (Laughs) Good luck finding a good White man who understands your journey. I only have three White friends. I’ve got 20 Black male friends, who are all good men who take good care of their wives, and good care of their children. I know amazing Black men. Maybe the women have to take better care of their men. Maybe you’re being too stubborn. Maybe you’re not saying you’re sorry. You have to take good care of him, too. You have to give love to get love.