I watched the first season of Braxton Family Values and as silly as it is I really enjoyed it. I haven’t been able to keep up with this season’s episodes and instead have been allowing myself a few spoilers here and there. Today I read that Trina’s husband Gabe was caught having a lot of cybersex, including some with a transgendered woman (who he denies having ever had cybersex with, but that’s beside the point). This is not the first time he’s cheated on his wife, and in a statement clearing things up Gabe stresses that he is not gay and links his lack of judgement to sexual addiction.
So…you have a sex addiction but have not had physical sex with anyone. Ok.
Every time I hear someone use the word “addiction” linked to anything but the usual things like alcohol or drugs I have to un-learn what society has taught me about addiction, remind myself that addiction comes in all forms, and try to be sympathetic. I do believe that addiction is a serious disorder that can be treated and overcome. But sex addiction? I didn’t buy it when Eric Benet or Tiger Woods said it, and I don’t believe it when this dude does.
Of course there are some people who are truly sex addicts — people get addicted to everything from picking their own scabs to drinking water, so it stands to reason that something as fun as sex would be the center of addictive behavior for many. But sometimes I wonder if “I have a sex addicition,” is usually just code for “I like having a lot of sex and don’t care about the consequences,” for dudes who get caught seeking fulfillment outside of their relationships.
No, I do not believe in sex addiction.
Yes, I believe in sex addiction as I believe in sugar addictions, and strange addictions. Women have sex addictions as well. Aren’t addictions started to fill voids?
totally agree
Yes I believe in sex addiction.
Yes I believe it exists. I’m a recovering sex addict so to speak and I’m a female. However, I do think when most people get caught or are called out on their behaviour or cheating, they may use that to gain sympathy or something similar. Otherwise, people don’t come out in the open and say I’m a sex addict. It’s usually when they are being called out. Specifically people in the public eye.
Yea, I definitely think it exist for both men and women. You should watch “Bad Sex” on Logo (www.logotv.com/shows/bad_sex/series.jhtml). Its pretty clear a lot of people have deep emotional traumas or voids they are trying to compensate for – and its not just people who have sex, its people who have phobias *about* sex. That guy who probably was teased and ignored – and somehow blossomed into a Cassanova Adonis? Probably compensating for years of pubescent torture. That girl who may have been assaulted or seen an abusive interaction some place or another? Trying to gain a sense of control or self worth.
Its probably not nearly as uncommon as you’d think since the only real sexual addiction – is the kind where you’re trying to “fix” or “fill” something lacking in yourself – at the detriment of other areas in your life. There are LEAGUES of women who trade sex…for affection. Men who have sex to gain a sense of machismo. Both groups accounting for far more than the 6% that is alluded to by standard definition of “sex addicts”. Its not about the frequency or with how many people if you’re being safe and honest. Its about the mindset and associations you have even one sexual experience. You could have a sexually addictive and damaging sex life with ONE person if your head isn’t on straight. Just saying.
humans can addict to anything. the issue is addictive personality.
The devil is a lie and there is no sex addiction.
ROTFL!!!
Whatever makes you happy girl =D
I believe people can be addicted to anything when restrain/selfcontrol is not practiced. It kills me though when I hear people trying to use that as a pardon of sorts, as if to say they were not in control of their actions.
i believe in addiction with a controlled substance…. but something like sex.. man i dont know..
Yeah you can be essentially be addicted to anything. I think people give sex addiction a side eye because people use it as an excuse or don’t fully understand the addiction
If you can do something, you can be addicted to doing it… especially when that activity yields pleasure. It makes perfect sense that someone would be addicted to “sex”. Let me make it crystal clear, though, that having an addiction of any sort does NOT excuse behavior that threatens your life as a romantic partner.
Nope I think it is and excuse people, mostly men, use to justify their irresponsible behavior and actions while trying to garner sympathy and forgiveness from those affected by their actions.
If my boo, told me dat-I’d give him the strangest side eye that would have him unaddicted in a hot minute. Don’t believe in it….some diseases are MAN MADE!
If my boo, told me dat-I’d give him the strangest side eye that would have him unaddicted in a hot minute. Don’t believe in it….some diseases are MAN MADE! Like HIV/AIDS to finish the black populace,especially those in Africa…..GOD HELP US!
No such thing. Just folks that don’t know how to say no to booty. And you should repsect yourself enough to turn some of it down…..cause it can be deathly sometimes!
In some cases, yes I do. Especially if the person has a history of being sexually abused since early childhood, so sex becomes the only way in which they can relate to people. Since those genuine cases usually have a great deal of shame and self-loathing attached, I wouldn’t expect them to readily admit off the bat that they’re sex addicts.
Unfortunately, I think most of the instances we hear of today are from people trying to justify their decisions to continually cheat on their partners. “Oh, I can’t help myself! I must be a sex addict!” <- sorry, I find that to be a cop out, and a way to diminish their culpability in their actions.
“But sometimes I wonder if “I have a sex addicition,” is usually just code for “I like having a lot of sex and don’t care about the consequences,” for dudes who get caught seeking fulfillment outside of their relationships.” – cosign
I believe there is such thing as “being addicted to sex”, however I also believe that SOME people who have been caught cheating use it as an excuse.
however in my opinion, whether it is a legitimate excuse or some cop out cheating isnt cool and if I am the one getting cheated on I dont think I could or would stay with the person.
I would be like “oh you got an addiction? oh okay im sorry to hear that. well, I am going to let you go and handle up on that problem and pray you get it fix so you can be faithful to the next woman that comes in your life. peace!”
so the issue to me wouldnt be whether or not the cheating man is lying about this “sex addiction”. if he cheats im gone. end of story.
Agreed. I think a lot of guys get caught humping everything in sight, and then, looking for a way out, say, “I’m a sex addict! I’m messed up, I have a sickness”.
And then they get to go to rehab. And the woman he cheated on actually feels sorry for him.
Not saying all, just sayin’ that some of these men claiming they’re sex addicts pull this okey-doke.
I can understand drug addictions your body can honestly develop a dependency for a chemical substance. But sex, food and gaming addictions…really people? This are all things folks can over indulge in and then when they are caught or someone raises an eyebrow they wanna yell well I have a problem. So you cant say no to a piece of tail or you get it in cuz you like it….that does not make you an addict, you just enjoy sex. In most cases folks that cheat or sleep with a lot of folks use this EXCUSE cause that’s what it is. If most of these people just enjoyed sex with just there spouse, boo or a limited number of people, they’d be trotting along just like everyone else. How about owning up to this and just be responsible while doing it? Sigh stop. Truly, we can be such a needy and excuse riden generation sometimes.
I would if I were tall enough to get a black women f***ing heightists…