Every week, after “T.I. & Tiny: The Family Hustle” airs, I know I’m guaranteed to find a mixture of commentary about Mrs. Harris (aka Tiny)  throughout my Twitter feed. Not because of anything she may have said or done during the episode, but the subject never fails to be her looks. And it doesn’t just stop at Twitter. In fact, whenever the subject of T.I. or the show comes up, Tiny’s appearance always finds a way into the conversation–and it’s rarely anything positive. Her face. Her shape. Her hairstyles. Her choice of clothing. Her makeup. Tiny just can’t seem to catch a break.

But, why?

For the record, I’m not a Tiny fan. I don’t know much about her outside of the fact that she is wed to one of my favorite artists and she was a part of the group Xscape. But from what I’ve observed of her and T.I., they seem to have a good relationship. They’re both family oriented and despite their large blended family, they make things work. They enjoy each other’s company, and they have fun together. Their love seems real, and I like them together.

As an individual, Tiny seems caring and sweet. As a mother she comes across as loving and attentive. And as a wife she has proven herself to be loyal and devoted. So why is it so hard for people to accept her? Why is it so easy to poke fun at her?  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard someone say, “I don’t know how she pulled T.I.!” And I hear this especially from other women. Could it be that some of us have bought into the idea that men of a certain stature must have some dazzling beauty on their arm whether they make a good match for them or not? What about character, personality, and overall chemistry?

I think it’s deeper than Tiny. The bigger picture is that our society has become so consumed with looks and surface level attraction that we often fail to see past all of that. We mentally pair people together based on fame, looks and stature when quite often these handsome couples are void of sincere compatibility or anything in common besides looking good together in a photo op. And while T.I. and Tiny may not be the prototype for healthy marriages, I believe there’s more to their relationship than just physical attraction (and not that I’m ruling that out).

I admit, I used to be one to look at certain couples and scratch my head, and from time-to-time I still catch myself still doing it. He is too cute for her or she is too pretty for him, I would think to myself. But it wasn’t until I fell for someone who wasn’t what I thought was “my type.” I never thought this person was attractive, yet his personality truly won me over. We clicked. We bonded. And we got each other. It’s that thing many people experience in life, when you realize there’s more to love than a great smile, charming words, and a nice physique. You find that there’s something at our core, beneath our pretty or not so pretty exteriors that bonds us to another soul, despite what package it comes in.

We often call out artists for constantly displaying such unrealistic and unhealthy images of women in their videos, but when we see an artist settle down with someone like Tiny she gets ridiculed. Why subject each other as women to such double standards? It’s hard enough trying to embrace our own unique beauty, why make it hard for the next woman.

No, Tiny doesn’t look like the average girl from a video, and she is no more glamorous than the average girl around the way. She’s down-to-earth; she’s not picture-perfect, and who says she has to be? None of this should matter. True beauty is not what you see but it’s the essence of a person reflected in their actions, spirit and the good that they give of themselves to others. Overall, I think it’s unfair Tiny gets so much flack simply because of her looks. If she’s is to be critiqued, let it be for something more substantial than the fact that she does not fit everyone’s standard of beauty. And of course, that goes for anyone else.

So the next time we look at a couple and think “Why her?” or “Why him?” let’s challenge ourselves to wonder, why not? And if we can’t think of an anything beyond the surface, if we dig deeper, we just may be able to find the answer.

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  • Cecily

    Well firstly, I DON’T think they’re together for the right reasons. i have little doubt that T.I is probably unfaithful to Tiny. I think a BIG part of the reason he is with her is because she is easy to control. He really comes across as a very controlling spouse. She is easy to subdue. He basically forced her to give up on her career as a songwriter/performer, even though she wanted to continue to pursue that. When they got together, he was unknown and she was the star. That has completely switched now, and that’s how he likes it. Watching the Family Hustle, I would cringe at their relationship. People are so easily impressed! *Oh look, he set up a romantic dinner for them. Oh look, he just slapped her butt, how cute!* To me, the whole thing seemed fake. I really do not think he loves her. I think she adores him though.

    Secondly, I have to disagree with a lot of comments on one point- T.I *is* a good looking man. When even unattractive rappers have very attractive spouses, I guess it was expected that T.I’s spouse be super special. Tiny is not only not super-special, she is very plain. I’m not saying that it should be important- but that may be a reason why people fixate on it. You often see the reverse, but not the beautiful man with the so-so woman. That’s less common.

    • Isis

      He should be with u???.cuz ur super special? Lmaooo

    • Cecily

      No….I think I made it pretty clear I consider him an asshole. The fact that he is attractive doesn’t change that.

      Tiny being ordinary looking is only made more obvious because she is with a man considered good looking, in an industry where even butt ugly men get gorgeous women.

      To answer your questions: no, I wouldn’t want his ass, and some people seem to think so.

    • Me and my bf watch Family Hustle and we always say it dosent Seem like he is that into her. She can be in the middle of a sentence he will cut her off and walk out of the room. It seems like more of a you had my back when you were on top(Tiny) and I was hustling and now I got you(T.I.). My mom did say how did she get him, she must got something on him. I thought she was a reformed alcoholic with the slurring words and ratchness.

  • mamareese

    Let’s be honest, most chicks are made becasue it aint them. But really it’s because she’s not video chick hot….anybody can buy a nose and lips, hips whatever. It takes a real woman to say I love everything about myself and damn what ya’ll think. That’s what makes her fly and that’s why TI loves him some Tiny. I think she’s a beautiful person simply because of that fact and because OF that fact alone she got her a good dude that gives her all life has to offer. Don’t be mad because your chickenheaded ways or your bought booty aint got you that. Leave the woman alone.

  • mamareese

    And I’m not so sure about him cheating. He has baby mamas so he has not problem with moving on. If he is I think it’s because of the industry he’s in and booty is always there. I don’t think for a minute that he doesn’t love his wife and family. What he should cheat because she doesn’t look the way you think she should? When are women gonna stop nit picking other ladies and focus on their own lives and appearance. The same chicks mad at Tiny are the chicks that cant afford a “good weave” and shop at Rainbows for they “club” outfit….basic chicks get mad at basic things……who he married and why is basicially his business. Word.

    • NY’s Finest

      Lmao@ shop at Rainbows for they “club” outfit.

  • LOVE THIS ARTICLE!! And I love them as a couple! That’s true love right there!

  • Misty Knight

    I agree, at this point it is so redundant to keep harping on Tiny’s looks. I guess it stems from men of means always being seen with the most attractive wives/GF’s money can buy, so Tiny’s presence in TI’s life kind of contradicts that notion. Even though I never got why TI was such a “prize” he stay’s going to jail, has a body that seems to have never finished puberty, and from I hear has terrible skin. If he wasn’t rich and famous, they wouldn’t be raising these many eyebrows.