Woman Sleeping in BedWhen I first met my vibrator, I was twenty years old, looking to enhance my art of masturbation, and add more power to my orgasms. I had been touching myself since I was 11, mainly with my fingers and occasional objects. But I had never experienced a deep orgasm until the second time I had sex, and it felt like all the energy being built in my vagina dispersed to every cell in my anatomy. It was an intense feeling I could never seem to get myself to again without a sexual partner, but I kept hearing how women were experiencing similar types of orgasms through vibrating toys.

With a guy I was dating, I went to a sex shop and he purchased my first vibrating rabbit dildo, which was followed by a vibrating “pelvic floor” massager gifted by the host of a media appearance I did. Both toys had multiple vibration settings, and when applied to my clitoris, I’d feel powerful orgasms shoot through my body within seconds, matching many of the sensations I’d felt with my sexual partners.

I was addicted.

I’d go to work, come home, and play with my toys. I’d still have sex with the guy I was dating, but all of the sudden it became a simple “option” instead of a necessity to fulfill my sexual urges. I learned how liberating masturbation really could be for women. And I reveled in my newfound power to get myself off in a powerful way.

But there was one thing; I noticed that the initial vibration settings that I used when I first got my vibrator were no longer enough to “get me off.” I found myself increasing the power of each toy’s vibration until I eventually hit the maximum setting. Otherwise, I wouldn’t get the same powerful orgasm that I was addicted to feeling. And that was a problem.

As a sexuality writer, I read a lot of literature and research on sex. And when I really dove into learning more about the clitoris’ anatomy and how many nerves women really have down there, I realized that the power of vibrators might be great for providing powerful orgasmic shocks but they also numb some of our nerves after repeated use.

What I was feeling in terms of needing stronger vibrations to get my orgasmic fix was my nerves getting number to touch. Now I needed strong, powerful finger strokes or vibrations to get my juices flowing, when before I only needed a light rub, tongue tickle, or touch by my partner.

So I decided to take a break from using my toys. And eventually, my addiction faded. I began to only use them maybe once or twice a month. I focused on getting my clitoris and vaginal sensations responsive again to light touches and mere thoughts. Now, I’m at a place where I feel more sensitive in that area than ever. And I’m not willing to lose it.

I had an orgasm recently from my fingers gently stroking my clitoris, and my body shook like someone took me by the shoulders and was trying to shake me awake from the dead. It was that powerful. I realized that I didn’t need my toys. And that natural masturbation can give you just as much pleasure as vibrators if you take the time to train and focus on your senses down there.

It’s official. I’m breaking up with my vibrator.

Do you use vibrators to frequently masturbate? Or do you find it better to solely depend on your hands and non-vibrating objects? Speak on it.

66 Comments

  1. I’m not talking about regular hand masturbation for either men or women…..I’m talking about the fixation and popularity of electric mechanical devices that give the number of orgasms and a quality orgasms that cannot be achieved by human beings
    If women were okay with men bringing sex toys home and putting them under their side of the bed, devices that give men more and better orgasms than women can give them,….then women may understand the emotional and relationship damage surrounding this issue. The fact is is that women don’t want the competition and so why is that different than how men feel about it???

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  2. Annabelle

    Arielle can I ask how long you generally go without an orgasm? Does it matter if the time between orgams is longer? I am currently in the same situation (giving up on vibrators) and I am “taking a week off” with no orgasms to try to clear my system. Finding it very difficult after 15+ years of once a day orgasms to abstain. Ridiculous because I am not a hormone-filled teen! Still…its been 4 days and I am hanging on by my fingernails.

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