The periods in my life when you can’t find a man around me, even with the secret service on your side, are usually imposed on me and last so long I tend to consider them famines, so the idea of going on a man diet or fast, as one Glamour blogger recently did has yet to appeal to me—totally.
For six weeks, the writer totally quit men—no flirting, texting, calling, or especially thinking about men, in order to reclaim the mental space she had allowed too many worthless guys to take up too much of. When all was said and done, the experiment felt well worth it, especially after the turmoil she experienced in the first week subsided. For her, focusing on work, her friends, and her own happiness without worrying about what guys were around was a much-needed break from the drama of the dating world.
Not to toot my own multi-tasking horn, but I’ve never really had a problem balancing work and relationships (toot toot)—at least when things were going well. But when there’s an argument or I’m wondering why someone hasn’t called or whether things are going anywhere, it can be difficult for me to concentrate on things I should. The fact that I tend to get a little anxious about when a replacement will rescue me from the barren land has also prompted me to consider making an intentional choice to cut men out of my life—and be OK with it—for a little while at least. For me, it’s not so much the lack of contact that’s difficult, it’s the need to control my thoughts about my singledom, which is why I like how a fellow Glamour blogger handled her diet. As her New Year’s resolution, she vowed to cut out the following, crazy, unsexy, and not cool behaviors:
- Checking my ex’s Facebook page to see what new girls he’s friending these days, or feeling bitter when his friends “like” a picture of him with another woman right after our breakup.
- Feeling sorry for myself for being single when I hang out with my (insert any female associate) and her husband.
- Not having an open mind about Midwestern guys.
- Obsessing over the life I thought I’d have.
Those resolutions all hit the nail on the head for me—even the part about being from the Midwest. I’m not totally, 100 percent sold on the idea of a fast because I feel I’ve had plenty of time to think about and focus only on myself, but making an effort to bask in my singleness can’t hurt. I mean I’ll be single regardless, might as well enjoy it without worrying about who’s not in it, right?