From Frugivore — Filled with despair, Julie Askew watched her 13-year-old daughter try on yet another outfit in the mirror — then fling it on to the growing pile of clothes on her bedroom floor.

“I’m fat and ugly — and I look horrible!” a tearful Amie wailed. ‘“I can’t wear this to the school disco. It’s just not fair.”

That’s how The Daily Mail begins its profile of a young girl who had already internalized severe body-image issues. The question always arises: where do such negative views come from? And most of time people will blame the household from which she comes.

Julie, 48, a business development manager from Maidstone, Kent, says: “Normally I would have blamed the shops for selling clothes which are cut too small, told her the style didn’t suit her, or insisted she looked lovely.”

“But by this point she weighed more than 13 stones (182 pounds), and the hissy fits about how awful she looked were becoming so regular that I had to say something.”

“So this time, instead of denying it, I blurted out: ‘Yes, Amie, you’re right. You are overweight — and the only person who can do something about it is you.’”

A response that holds her daughter personally responsible — somewhere, a Republican is smiling. But when is it ever okay to tell someone they are fat, which is now the new “f-word.”

Stateside, Americans have tried to figure out the best way to engage the obesity epidemic. In Georgia, the Georgia Children’s Health Alliance spent $50 million on its Strong4Life campaign last summer to address the state’s pressing childhood obesity epidemic.

At the start of this year, the organization ramped up its efforts with a series of billboards and TV ads meant to “stop sugar-coating” the problem. “We needed something that was more arresting and in your face than some of the flowery campaigns out there,” Linda Matzigkeit, senior vice president of Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta, told ABC News.

One of the black-and-white posters of a gloomy-looking overweight girl is emblazoned with the statement: “Warning. It’s hard to be a little girl if you’re fat.” Another ad, under a sad-faced boy, reads: “Fat prevention begins at home. And the buffet line.”

The campaign’s videos are equally frank and grim. In one, a plump girl says, “I don’t like going to school because all the other kids pick on me. It hurts my feelings.” In another, an obese boy asks his overweight mom, “Why am I fat?”

(Read the rest at Frugivore)

  • I call Bull

    I would have never let it get that far, at 23 & a height of 5’10 I’ve never reached over 160 lbs and even that was too heavy for me. If I have a daughter, I would be frank but not insensitive to the fact that she is overweight. I would put the household on a diet, without saying so, and enroll her in something athletic such as karate, kick boxing, dance etc something that she will enjoy but will get her moving and invested in her physical health. If none of that helped, I would make sure we see a doctor to check if there are underlying health issues. There’s no reason for a child to be that heavy.

  • http://www.talesfromtheurbansocialite.com Amber (The Urban Socialite)

    I grew up overweight, and at 22 I’m just now learning how to eat to live and not live to eat. I don’t think it’s okay to call your child “fat”, but I definitely think you should let your child know if they’re overweight, just not in a demeaning/shameful way. Besides, isn’t the parent somewhat at fault for a child being overweight anyway? Your child didn’t come out of the womb asking for high fructose corn syrup and deep fried foods.

  • CurlySue

    What is the point of calling your child fat? You made them this way! Afterall, they live in your home and eat the food that YOU buy and cook. And don’t give me that “well, the school lunches are unhealthy”. That is ONE meal. Also, pack your child’s lunch. Simple as that. Don’t be lazy. Wake up, pack your child a healthy lunch, and play with your children and ALLOW them to play. There is nothing more unnatural than childhood obesity. As a child, that’s the time when your metabolism and energy levels are off the chart. So, barring any medical anomaly, if your child is overweight, it is your fault. End of story.

  • twee

    I don’t think it’s okay to call your child fat but if a child is overweight it will have much to do with what they’re eating at home so as the parent, get it under control. Make the food healthy but still make sure it tastes good, and do things that will allow them to become more active without it feeling like they started a new workout routine. The more normal the changes are the more likely the child will adapt. And make the changes early in their lives.

  • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com Perverted Alchemist

    What parent hasn’t called their child fat in this day and age? That’s what I wanna know…

  • OSHH

    I agree with Curly Sue, it is all about starting the child off EARLY with proper nutrition and encouraging physical activity as a way of life. Lead by example and then you won;t have an overweight child.
    Some kids like adults use food to cope after GOD forbid a trauma/stress etc but if they have been provided a safe, nurturing and healthy environment in which to develop and thrive, then physical health and nutrution is very much apart of that.

  • chanela

    I thought this was related to rihanna’s dad calling her fat. just put them in athletic classes. what’s the big deal? quit taking them to mcdonalds and dont let other adults take the child to mcdonalds.
    Also why does the article only say “She”? are we really gonna enforce the double standard that its perfectly fine for men to be bigger but women MUST be thin? the title kinda rubbed me the wrong way tbh.

  • LAD86

    When would it ever be ‘right’ for a parent to say something like that to their child?

  • Mo

    I think it is okay to tell your child she is fat, not necessarily call her fat, but is she is becoming aware of being overweight, it is okay to level with her. Where I think the mother erred, and the writer pointed out, was in saying that no one could do anything about it but the child. Your child is your responsibilty and if she is overweight you are as responsible for helping her overcome it as you would be for any other health issue.

    I think the way you go about helping the child is most important. Shaming, harrassing and goading a child will not do any more to help them lose weight than ignoring the problem did. That mother should have said ‘You’re right. You are fat and if you are concerned about it, i will make a deal with you right now to help you lose it.” They can see the child’s doctor and work out a healthy eating plan that the entire household can adhere to and the mother could offer to at least walk the neighborhood with or work out with the child. Many times young children’s metabolisms are so strong a small change in diet and an increase in physical activity can get them in the weight range they should be in and maybe prompt a lifelong joy in exercise.

    Honesty is perfectly acceptable when blended with support and concern and not just coming from a negative point of view.

  • Wuluwulu

    Depends on how u are going to say it; if you’r egoing to say “You’re a cow, lose some weight”, that approach is a big non-no. If you sit your child down and explain to them the longtern health implications of being overweight or obese and the need to lose some weight that is a completely different approach. Parents should not enable bad lifestyle choices just because they don’t want to hurt thier children’s feelings.

  • Rastaman

    Is the child fat?

  • Tonton Michel

    It’s not about what you say, it’s all about how you say it.

  • binks

    I agree, this is the case of not what you say but how you say it and convey the message. I have no problem with parents being honest with their kids about their weight. Mentioning and having a frank discussion about said child of being overweight in a way that is helpful and still nurturing environment is needed, not going off like your Precious’ mom about your kid’s weight. My mom did it for me, when I came home on college break “hitting the scale at a whooping 400+…blushing” she pulled me aside and said “honey you are to big you need to lose some weight…” and I am glad she did because A) I was delusional at the time concerning my weight and B) if your parents can be honest with you than who can

  • LAD86

    “It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it” is a bunch of crock. It matters BOTH what you say AND how you say it.

  • Lish

    After living this I will have to agree that its not what you say its how you say it…..

  • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

    No. In the first place, why is your child fat?! A CHILD means they look up to you as a parent for food. Why then are they fat?! C’mon!!! Organic food is NOT expensive! Do your research and stop being on that bandwagon of I can’ afford it. BULL!

  • Tonton Michel

    No it does, case in point you could have said ” I disagree, both of them matter, instead you chose to say ‘It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it’ “is a bunch of crock.”

    Which I can respond with either that you have not given it much thought and having a knee jerk reaction or I can say you are an obtuse idiot talking smack behind a computer.

    See how that works.

  • Candy 1

    I think it is ok to tell your child they are overweight. I would never dog my child out or try to hurt them, because I am the one who sets the tone for eating habits and fitness in my home, anyway, so if your kids are overweight, then you played a part. I would not say “You’re fat and it looks ugly.” But I would say “I love you, but you are overweight and I am worried about your health. You are becoming a young lady/man and you need to take care of yourself. From now on, there are going to be some changes in our house–no more junk food and we all have no choice but to be active…”, and so on.

  • pink

    In some cases the parents are overweight themselves. So how can they tell a kid they are fat when the parents aren’t setting a good example. Bottomline people need to EAT LESS and MOVE MORE. Exercise is the key. It can be as simple as walking instead of always (riding) somewhere.

  • pink

    The advice that some experts give that we should shop from the OUTSIDE AISLES of the grocery store (which includes fresh fruits, veggies, low fat cheeses, and eggs) INSTEAD OF THE INSIDE AILSES (whch include boxed processed foods) is so true!! Also until we stop eating all the fast foods, and start eating more fruits, and veggies the overweight epidemic will continue. Anything in a box needs to be thrown away,i.e., boxed mac & cheese, hamburger helper, pancake mix, and (even) cereals. Added to our daily meals should be “Fresh” (NOT CANNED) green beans, cabbage, broccoli. green, and red peppers, apples, oranges (not orange juice that is packed with sugar….but real/fresh oranges, pears), cantelope, watermelon, etc.

  • chinaza

    “Fat” is not a bad word.
    If your daughter is fat,she’s fat. Why lie about it? You only create a lie that will be shattered-cruelly- by the persons outside your home.
    Whereas a parent can deal with it with truth and sensitivity and get her on a weight-loss program.
    Better yet-control your child’s weight from early and set the right example.

  • Alexandra

    It can have negative effects, but there are many ways to go about encouraging a child to shed some weight. ‘Fat’ is just name-calling, especially to kids. If that child is also struggling with self-esteem or image issues, calling them fat from time to time will help what?

    I like the ‘educate through health’ approach. Some might say it’s a scare tactic, but children have a long life ahead of them. Most children are active and as a parent you can tell your child about the possible health issues being overweight may give them in the future. Put your child in a sport team, recreational center, etc; Parents who are health conscious should prepare healthy meals at home so their kids can develop nutritious eating habits. Where are they picking up these eating habits leading to their weight?
    I don’t understand how some parents allow their children to become overweight. A lot of that starts at home. I know for a fact the only reason I enjoy eating veggies is because I was raised eating it. If the parents aren’t eating healthy either, how can the child?

  • Krysie

    Let’s flip it. Is it okay to tell a child she’s skinny? What if she was suffering from an eating disorder? That would make things worse for her.

  • LAD86

    What I could have said, I already did.

    As someone who has grown up with a narcissistic, abusive mother AND dealt with people’s rude comments about me not fitting into their idea of what femininity is, I can assure you that my response doesn’t fall into either one of your presumptions. Nor was it specifically directed to you.

  • overseas_honeybee

    Agreed. It’s how you say it and what you do to help them reach a healthy weight. Growing up I was heavy and my family members often expressed their “concern” in the wrong way, while they themselves tipped the scales at 200+ pounds. Be the example for your child. Stop buying junk food, encourage them, enroll them in sports or just get out there and exercise WITH THEM. Do it as a family.

  • Monie

    +1
    “Being frank but not insensitive” is key! I grew up with an African grandmother who didn’t hold her tongue, so my feelings got hurt alot esp when she told me I was getting overweight. My confidence took a nose dive,I became to preoccupied w/ what other thought of me and I’m just getting comfortable w/ my body now within the past few years and I’m 23yrs old. Be tactful parents, please!

  • ThisIshRightHere

    All I know is, I will do everything in my power NOT let my children be overweight. I was overweight as a teenager (which I did not see anything wrong with because I was beginning to look more like my mother (also overweight), which is valuable to any young girl). And every-so-often–especially when she was upset–my mom would call me fat and tell me to “get yourself on some kind of program.” Interestingly, I was a two-season athlete, I just ate like a fool. I never understood why she wasn’t more positive and helpful about the situation.

  • Ms. Information

    There aren’t really any older fat people, that analogy itself should get kids in line.

  • Frenchy83

    It is NOT necessary to tell your child he/she is fat. They allllready know, so it’s not going to help that the person, you, the parent, that provides that only source of unconditional love to them point out the obvious. Trust me, if these children are over 4 years old, they know their weight relative to their peers. Someone has already said they’re fat directly or indirectly anyways, again, not going to help for you, parent, to reiterate.

    Just get them out of the house, unknowingly, get active and have a ball doing it!! Get creative in the kitchen with healthy, homecooked meals, no reason to explain why. Mommy’s/ Daddy’s just trying out something different and better, that’s all. Make it a challenge for the whole family, with YOU in the driver’s seat. Don’t point her out from everyone else in the household, this leads to sneaking food, sneaking around trying to invisible all the while getting bigger and more ashamed and out of control as I’ve done as an overweight kid.

    I’m saying this from experience. Both my 11 year old daughter and I are on the heavier side. Both having about 30 pounds to lose (both down 10 so far). Nothing hurts me worse than knowing that this is SOLELY my problem, kids do what they are taught, my daughter can’t make it any more evident to me because her old eating habits mirror mine exactly.

    It is not for me to sting her with words. Anyway you say “you are fat” comes out exactly as, “you are fat”. Don’t fool yourselves, it hurts anyway. Kids take that info and make it their mission to make you happy, instead of themselves and it will fail every time. I’ve tried that, I failed more times than I can count.

    Simply do all the reading you can on family fitness and reverse everything you’ve been doing. They have no choice but to follow along but just make it so exciting that they would rather do this new thing, rather than the old. It’s been working wonders in my house. I needed it just as much, if not more than she did.

    Fitness and healthy eating should be held to the same standards as getting good grades, keeping the house tidy, curfews etc. All these things are taught at home. Kids will be more apt to pick up this new habit than the adults. But it MUST start with the adults.

  • apple

    dont flat out say YOUR FAT, encourage your kid to become thinner for health reasons, not for vanity… with vanity she willl grow to hate herself/himself but with health they may see it as important and may do something to actually fix it

  • ComesInPeace

    I mean no offense…and please believe me when I say that. I don’t understand how your 11yr old daughter 30lbs overweight? That’s a lot of extra weight for a child.

    I assume she lives with you, you make most of her meals, she gets limited allowance money (so she can’t splurge on junk food) and has friends she gets out to play with.

    *If any of these assumptions are wrong, please correct me*

    So the only question that remains, Is it the food you are preparing? I wouldn’t think so as you seem to be aware of the fact that being overweight is not healthy and this usually translates into better eating habits. Has she been sick on medication? Is it a thyroid/pituary gland problem? Any of those and my thought process goes “Ah ok understood”. If it’s not any of the above, then I remain genuinely puzzled as to how this can be.

    If parents are in charge of their childrens diet (buying the groceries, preparing the meals, monitoring consumption of junk food), then how can you possibly let you child gain 30lbs of excess weight? I don’t get it :-/

  • ComesInPeace

    Agreed.

    If you are fat, you are fat.

    If you are skinny, you are skinny.

    And so it goes. Welcome to life.

  • Keep it Real

    80 to 85% of black women past puberty are overweight. They say it’s genetics, however, when I go to other countries 80 to 85% of the black women ARE NOT overweight. Someone said earlier that the kids know they’re overweight. I strongly disagree. Ask the average American Black Woman 180 to 220 pounds about weight. Their views on weight are shocking……shocking.

    I know some woman 5’11 to 6’2 is going to come on here to disagree when we all know I’m talking about black women of average height.

  • leonard smalls

    Interesting comment; however, allow me to add the following:

    1. Reflection – Contrary to popular belief, your child is not your own and should arguably be seen as a gift to the community. As such, they are a group’s reflection; which, means that unhealthy children reflect an unhealthy community. Arguably, telling a child that they are overweight is not so much meant to scorn them but rather a means of instilling self worth and a sense of having an obligation to their community.

    2. Fruit of Islam – Although I am not a practicing member of the Nation of Islam, the Honorable Elijah Mohammad penned a book called “How to Eat to Live.” This book guides Colored people toward health and is comprehensible by those above the age of 11. A Colored child may be told that they are fat and what that means in terms of their group’s oppression. Anything less is arguably “Colored child abuse.”

    3. Fantasies – Only those suffering from “negro assimilationist fantasies” would think that the Colored man should view food and health as other groups do and have the same approach. Telling your child that they are fat and as such easier to control and manipulate arguably allows that child to better understand their existence. Not to be immature, but “knowing is half the battle.”

  • leonard smalls

    Interesting comment; however, allow me to add the following:

    1. Self Worth – A child is capable of self realization.

    2. Time – The average parent doesn’t have the time nor the capable schedule to work out with the child.

    3. Thick Skin – Colored people must have thick skin in order to exist in this world. As such, becoming perturbed because a family member called you fat/obese/disgusting should not be the end of the world for that child as long as the adult also tells that child how much they love them constantly.

  • http://www.LifeStarBeauty.com Vida Starr

    Well good luck with telling kids their fat and see how that works. I can guarantee you it will more than likely make the problem worse. Sometimes you have to step back and look at your goal then devise a strategy. If the goal is to have a healthy child (And that includes both physically, mentally, and emotionally) then you have to think about what needs to happen to accomplish that goal. Telling someone “What they are” is never gonna be successful. You have to talk to them about their goals and their health. At 13, you know when you’re fat. So telling her that she’s fat isn’t gonna help anything. Even if she DOESN’T know it won’t help anything. The plan is “Hey so you are concerned about fitting into clothes and I am concerned about making sure you stay healthy. I’m scared that you will suffer so much due to your weight and I don’t want to see you suffer that way.” Once the child starts to see how the weight can be an issue you ask “So what are some things we can do to get you to where you want to be physically? What would like to do? What are some things we can do together as a family?’ Give the child a space to come up with the solution on their own. Then support them by having healthy food options in the home. Also lead by example. I’ve seen ppl criticize someone for their weight but then eat the EXACT same unhealthy foods if not WORSE! So don’t be a hypocrite. You want your child to be healthy, you have to be healthy as well.

  • Laina

    Instead of calling your child fat, try to figure out how your child got fat. As far as I know, children still rely on parents to provide food. If they are fat, they are fat because of your poor food choices. There is so much information out there about nutrition, open a book or magazine and read it. At my neighborhood supermarket, a large segment of Black shoppers load their carts with white bread, red dye sugared water, prepared foods full of chemicals and sugared cereal. Children are being set up by their parents for a life time of health issues including being exposed to second hand smoke.

  • sweetpea

    As i a child i was chubby. I felt bad about it already. Most of my friends were relatively skinny. My mother did her best giving me the right foods to eat, tryin to get me active. I was told by a family member, flat out: you`re fat. That hurt like hell. its how you say it.

    But may i add something else to the discussion. In spite of all my mom did, it didnt really work. I was not an active child….i liked to read, do crafts, write. i didnt like to run or play sports, not being very coordinated. I was also an emotional eater, so i snacked on the sly when i was upset or worried. If we are to help children with their eating, it may help to also look into how, when why, and what that child eats when their parents aren`t around. there are sometimes things below the surface.

  • pink

    Alexandra: You said “Most kids are active.” I’m glad that the kids you know are active. But believe me in MOST instances that’s not the case. In fact that’s one of the BIG issues o the obesity epidemic…..that kids are NOT active. Most kids don’t participate in sporting activities, nor do they walk anywhere (they want a ride everywhere they go……and for that manner so do adults). A lot of kids sit in front of a TV, computer, or game monitor 24/7. Plus the fact that they eat too many fast foods that are ladded with preservatives, and hormones. Obesity is a national problem for kid, and adults….and people need to wakeup

  • perplexed

    lol you are well-versed in what goes on in these here internets ;0)

  • perplexed

    have to agree.

  • r

    I am not a parent. But I feel that as a parent you have a large amount of control over your child’s weight. I was blessed with a mother who was a nurse and had an addition degree in nutrition. Sooo lets just say I might be biased. But instead of telling you child, “you are fat”, take the steps as a parent to help them loose weight. I know a lady who bribed her children with apple products if they lost weight when both of them are in elementary school. Lets just say, both are still big and still have gotten many apple products. Parents need to learn how to say no to their children and need to get educated about nutrition.

  • Tina

    I am a mother of a 14 year old girl who complains about needing to lose weight. As a matter of fact, she is the one that has found this article because she feels that I always call her fat.

    I don’t agree with her on that because I don’t go around calling her fat because I actually do not view her as fat but what I do tell her is that she LOOKS fat and sloppy when she puts on extremely tight clothing with love handles pouring over. At that point, she looks absolutely fat and disgusting.

    Understand this…I didn’t just start making these type of comments out of nowhere, but I have spoken to my daughter COUNTLESS times about this…it gets tired to see her continue walking out the door looking that way and I let her know that her peers do notice. She is sending out a very ugly and desperate message as well. After a while, I am no longer nice-nice with my approach.

    There comes a time and age where our children are indeed responsible for taking pride in their own appearance. My daughter is High School age, she must take some ownership and care for her own presentation.

    I notice someone go on about being responsible for what their child eats, so it’s their fault…well, no offense, but when your 11-year old is 30 lbs overweight (and not a sick child on medication), then it absolutely is something to look in the mirror on. At that point, there is some guilt to feel and sensitivity.

    I grew up being called SKINNY…hated it with a passion. I felt extremely uncomfortable and self conscious while all the thicker (and yes fat people) treated me like I looked disgusting. I am most definitely considerate and sensitive as I can be toward my daughter (who does weigh about 15 points more than me), but she must be held accountable at this point.

    I don’t believe she needs to lose weight for the most part, she feels that way. My issue is that she presents herself “fat” by wearing extremely tight clothing with fat bulging over. And trust me, I don’t purchase small clothes for her, but I have 3 children, full time work (long hours) and it’s hard to find that time to do the inventory thing (which to me is babysitting since I have her bring down small clothes every 2-3 months).

    Anyway, I had a long talk with her about this and she seems to finally get that I don’t feel she is fat, but she absolutely presents herself in a nasty, fat and sloppy look dressing that way.

    Tough love is what I have left in me when that “by the book” formula has proven not to work.

  • Ms. Information

    Tina, your daughter is 14 – who buys her tight clothes and her junk food? She is at an age where you can still control her behavior. MAKE her get up and get exercise and don’t give her money to buy junk and tight clothes.

  • http://www.LifeStarBeauty.com Vida Starr

    YOu seem like a very cruel and superficial mother. Maybe that is why she struggles with her weight. In your entire post, I only heard about how you are concerned about how she LOOKS. You didn’t say a damn thing like “I’m really worried about her physical health and emotional well-being.” You only talked about how disgusting she looks in certain clothes. Your daughter’s weight might be partially emotional. Seeing how you make her feel. Obviously your mindset and your approach to this situation isn’t solving the problem. You are probably just going to make it worse…. Or if anything make her resent you.

  • Crossroads

    We tell our young boys they are too short all the time! Why not this eh!?

  • Chantelle w

    Tina, As Clinical Social Worker….You have to be mindful of your comments and tone of your comments made to your daughter and how it may be effect the development of negative body image. There are ways you can phrase things so it is not internalized as demeaning. for example you said you don’t call her fat but you say she looks sloppy, think of another way you could have phrased that, more positive, Perhaps you could have said, I don’t think that outfits flatters your beautiful body, why don’t you change into something with a more loss fit.Be mindful that our childhood experiences can create a harmful cycle for our children, you admit to being teased for being skinny so do you attack your child’s body image as you were attacked? I would encourage that your family enroll in family therapy to develop better body image and better dialogue among each other. I wish you all the best.

  • pink

    Mr. Smalls: People need to make time for exercise. They make time for everything else they want to do. Bottomline is a lot of people are straight-up lazy when it comes to exercise!!

  • LAD86

    Will you quit it already with this height stuff, Crossroads AKA Donald K Summers!

  • Crossroads

    @LAD86,

    Black women have to stop first don’t you think?

    What have I said that was wrong?

    Every ounce of it is true, and truth should not be stifled…

  • Chicken Head

    I tell you what…..
    Umm Tina,

    Number 1: What do you mean you don’t call your child fat? You said “….I do tell her is that she LOOKS fat and sloppy when she puts on extremely tight clothing…”

    I know you said “looks” but that is still calling her fat. She even told you that’s what she is hearing.

    Number 2: I think it’s sad that you are leaving it up to your 14 year old daughter to be “held accountable at this point.” You shoved McDonald’s and other junk down her mouth for years and now it’s her problem? And why aren’t you making sure her clothes fit since it bothers you so much?

    Number 3: You said, “I don’t purchase small clothes for her, but I have 3 children, full time work (long hours) and it’s hard to find that time to do the inventory thing (which to me is babysitting since I have her bring down small clothes every 2-3 months).”

    Yet here you are on clutch making comments? It looks like you somehow made time for that.

    Saying you daughter “looks” fat and disgusting in her clothes is not tough love. Tough love would have been not letting her get to where she is now.

    Sorry but your little rant just made you look like a neglectful parent.

  • Sasha

    I just wanted to point out that the mother in the article didn’t call her daughter ‘fat’, she called her ‘overweight’ and I do not see what was wrong with saying that to her child. At the end of the day it is the parent’s buying the food their children are consuming therefore they are responsible for the foods their children are/ aren’t eating.

  • modern lady

    An adult shouldn’t be calling their own child names-but they need to acknowledge there’s a problem.

    It’s the adult’s responsibility to get that child exercising and eating properly. I’m sure that child hears the words ‘you’re fat’ enough at school.

  • Gabrielle

    Yes, of course it’s okay to call someone fat.
    On the other hand, someone who’s ten pounds over weight doesn’t exactly have a problem, they’re just on the heavier side (could possibly have big bones?) there’s a line between if something is offensive or informative/helpful.
    And even if someone’s 182 pounds, if you tell them they’re “fat” that’s not exactly a nice word.
    overweight is nicer. It’s more scientific and makes it seem as though your basing this off of their weight, not how they look.
    I mean, yes, everyone is fat! It’s “fat” and we all have it. You lift up you’re shirt, you’re probably fat. The only people who get teased for being “fat” are the people who’s fat we can actually see (and I’m not talking about a bump-which I have and I actually find it cute- I’m talking about a bulge) when we really all have fat.
    Overweight is the correct term. And just because your BMI tells you you’re overweight online doesn’t mean you actually are.
    Example:
    I’m 14. I’m 5’1 and my scale says 130 pounds. I go online and find out that’s “at risk of becoming overweight” so I freak out and go to the doctor. I guess I didn’t realize I only had a little bit of belly fat, and that I have big boobs and a big bum which is where all the weight pretty much is, and that I am Italian so I’m big boned, and also that my scale was weighing me ten pounds heavier then I really was. :)

  • JNPOST

    I am 13 and I got really heavy after third grade the summer of 5th grade I got it all off. I am so glad that I got it off but I am constantly self conscience and afraid that it will all come back. I am always telling myself just keep it up and it willl not come back. The main thing is when you have a child that undergoes major weightloss make sure to supprt them because it is hard.

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