“Soul Food,” actress Malinda Williams isn’t a big fan of Steve Harvey’s book Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man nor the movie that depicts the self help book for women. Like many other celebrities, Williams took to her Twitter to express her dismay.

“God gave me the gift of being able 2think like a woman. I’m gonna hold on 2that treasure. – but I will support my fellow thesps & filmmakers.”

“If God wanted us to think like men, he would have formed us from Adam’s brain instead of his sensitive rib. – stay in your lane.”

“Folks better not let these movies/books take ya out of God’s grace & get put out of ya man’s place,” which she retweeted from a follower or friend.

 

What do you think about Williams’ tweets? Does she have a point or is she just throwing shade?

  • Robbie

    I have to agree with her on that.

  • SJ

    She speaks the truth.

  • Jess

    i love everything that she tweeted. finally, some realness about that movie, nt the typical zombie response to go and see it! i’m a woman and proud, dammit. I love mymne, but i damn well will not let them try to make me into the 2nd class citizens that white men have made them into.

  • Bosslady

    I agree with her wholeheartedly. Like her, I will go and watch it to support the project, as it has lots of actors in it I enjoy, but the actual premise of the book/film….I am a woman and proud!

  • binks

    LOL I love her second tweet! But I agree, I don’t think it is throwing shade she has a right to her opinion she is not bashing the movie or anyone but giving her perspective. But I think Malinda is a wonderful actress I would love to see her back on TV

  • http://blackwomendeservebetter.com BWDeserveBetter

    Malinda hit the nail on this one! Women were not created to be “miniature men”. The whole “Think Like A Man” craze is a glaring symptom of what’s amiss in many Black constructs. The males expect women to fulfill their roles, and many naively go along with such an imbalanced arrangement.

  • JoJo

    I think she is reading too much into it. Although Ms. Williams is a beautiful and successful woman, I wouldn’t take much of what she says seriously. She hasn’t been quite successful in her public relationships with men (just ask Mekhi Phifer and the other dude she briefly married). I think Steve Harvey’s purpose with the book and movie was to help intelligent and beautiful sisters like Ms.Williams who continue to fight where there is no battle. Baby girl, it aint that serious!I All women with a functional brain knows she can’t think like a man, and Steve knows this too. But if a woman desires to have success in her relationships with men, it wouldn’t hurt to understand their thought process.

  • modern lady

    Although the book says “think like a man” I don’t think it actually meant that literally. Sounds like homegirl is salty over not getting a part in the movie. Either way, the movie looks just ok. Nothing to write home about.

  • QCastle

    @modern lady

    I agree. I think “Think Like A Man” is getting women to consider what men are thinking. Its not a call to be men but really knowing what strategy the opposing team is going with.

  • Jess

    sage advice from a repost from another blog on why we shouldn’t think like men (although the movie DOES look cute and i will be seeing it this weekend):

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    http://www.charlottevibe.com/2012/04/therapist-gives-5-reasons-not-to-think-like-a-man/

    Therapist Gives 5 Reasons Not To “Think Like A Man”
    Untitled-1

    PSYCHOTHERAPIST DR. DWAYNE L. BUCKINGHAM GIVES FIVE REASONS WHY WOMEN SHOULD NOT “THINK LIKE A MAN”

    Psychotherapist Dr. Dwayne L. Buckingham, LCSW, BCD gives a professional perspective on Steve Harvey’s movie, Think Like a Man, which is based on the book, Think Like a Man, Act Like a Women: What Men Really Think About Love, Relationships, Intimacy, and Commitment (2009).

    On May 10, Dr. Buckingham will release his new book, Qualified, Yet Single: Why Good Men Remain Single to reveal the abnormal thought patterns behind men’s emotions and actions, which women should not try to emulate. While Dr. Buckingham thanks Steve Harvey for sharing his perspective about men with millions of women and praises him for igniting a meaningful dialog, he points out that Steve Harvey is a professional comedian not a licensed relationship expert and can only provide an opinion based on his experiences.

    Many understand that the movie, Think Like a Man is probably intended to be a humorous parody to make light of an ongoing situation, however Dr. Buckingham expresses that he is deeply disturbed by the fact that Steve Harvey is instructing women to play games and to use bribery to get what they desire from men – especially since love and relationships are highly cherished in the Black community. “Relationships built on game playing cannot, and do not, work. Steve Harvey’s advice to ‘think like a man’ is extremely irrational and flawed. An individual’s behavior is not only influenced by thinking, but is determined by it. It is impossible to think one way and act another. Flawed and irrational thinking will not, and cannot, lead to healthy emotional expression or behavior,” states Dr. Buckingham.

    As a licensed and board certified psychotherapist with more than fourteen years of clinical and community outreach experience, Dr. Buckingham feels that his efforts to help Black women enter into and develop healthy relationships are being undermined by self-proclaimed relationship experts who are sabotaging and corrupting the mind-sets of women who desire to receive true love and commitment from men. He feels that self-proclaimed relationship experts give advice based on external behavior that is present to the eye, but often do not discuss the why behind behavior because they are not trained or truly qualified to do so.

    Dr. Buckingham explains that in some cases it is okay to start at a person’s present situation and move forward, which is the basis of life coaching. However, in his professional experience with interacting with thousands of women and men in therapy, he explains that behind every behavior there is usually an underlying emotional or psychological issue that has not been addressed.

    With so much attention being focused on Steve Harvey’s movie and book, which many believe its concepts and have taken Steve Harvey’s advice, Dr. Buckingham strongly advises that before taking advice from anybody the listener should research and check credentials of those who are providing blueprints based on their personal experiences. Dr. Buckingham explains that human behavior and development is much more complex than what is discussed on radio shows, blogs, and in barber and beauty shops.

    From a professional assessment, Dr. Buckingham gives five reasons why women should not “Think Like a Man”:

    1. Women should not “Think Like A Man” because men often think that minimizing and repressing emotions is acceptable. While both women and men experience emotional distress, men’s coping styles are usually very passive in nature when it comes to dealing with emotions. Men are repeatedly instructed to deny or minimize emotions; therefore men often ignore and avoid dealing with them until they become unbearable.

    2. Women should not “Think Like A Man” because men think that expression of emotions is a sign of weakness. Expressing sensitive or nurturing emotions, or giving freely, is not praised or encouraged among men. The pressure to maintain masculinity and to remain strong often creates emotional roadblocks for men. As a result, feelings of remorse, forgiveness, sadness, and empathy are overshadowed by feelings of self-pity, anger, embarrassment, pride, and loss.

    3. Women should not “Think Like A Man” because some men think that it is okay to make decisions with their “little heads” instead of their big heads. “Get all the sex, you can get” mindset appears to be the driving force that dictate most men’s behavior. Sexual dominance is often praised and encouraged among men and is used to demonstrate power and control. This mindset is the root cause of adulterous behavior among some men and is significantly contributing to the decline of the institution of marriage.

    4. Women should not “Think Like A Man” because men think that it is acceptable to think then act. This is unhealthy and flawed thinking because the most important aspect of human bonding and understanding is centered on emotional intimacy, not intellectual or behavioral. A man or woman who operates without processing from the heart will often fail at developing meaningful relationships. Decisions to act should not occur without processing thoughts, feelings and behaviors (Think-Feel-Do).

    5. Women should not “Think Like A Man” because some men think that they can play games and get positive results in their relationships. How defective is this thinking? Even the bible says, “You Reap What You So” (Galatians 6:7). If a relationship is started by playing games, those in the relationship will become a game. If a relationship is entered based on deception, the relationship will be maintained based on deception.
    According to Dr. Buckingham, Steve Harvey’s claim that women should stop asking other women how to keep a man and take the advice from men on how to keep a man is baseless. Many studies have shown that men are dealing with the same issues as women of desiring relationships, but unable to achieve them. According to the U.S. Census there are over 40 million men who have never married. In his upcoming book and film, Qualified, Yet Single: Why Good Men Remain Single, Dr. Buckingham gives an intimate look into the hearts and minds of several successful Black men who are being challenged in their pursuit of love due to their personal issues.

  • http://stephanietalktome.blogspot.com Stephanie

    It’s just a movie. Really? What does God have to do with the movie? See and this is why people don’t take you serious when you want them to. I look at this movie like the entertainment that it really is. I don’t see anybody taking notes. It’s a movie for laughs. Why would you look to someone else for your guidance in the first place? It’s not that deep.

  • QCastle

    @Jess

    That article was very sexist.

  • cassy

    I agree with you. I read Steve’s book and I think his goal was to help women see how men think when it comes to relationships which most times gives them the opportunity in many relationships to take advantage of women. It doesn’t mean women are to have a man’s mind, but that they should use more wisdom in their relationships with men. To me thinking like a man simply means I ask myself “how is this man’s mind working?” so I can make better decisions for myself. I think it’s wise to know how anyone thinks who I associate with so I can make better choices for myself. Especially since they aren’t always going to tell me what and how they are thinking.

  • https://twitter.com/#!/TheKMichel K. Michel

    This is interesting, Jess.

    I haven’t read the book. However, when I hear the phrase, “Think Like A Man”, I think of women learning to empathize with men, their feelings, their pressures, their joys and everything in between. But then, I suppose a phrase like this is really subject to interpretation …especially for those who haven’t read the book, like myself.

    I could see how this can be seen as sexist, QCastle. Maybe he should’ve used quantifiers. Personally, I wasn’t offended.

    As for Malinda Williams, I liked what she had to say as well. There was an air of stability in her remarks, and it felt welcoming to me.

  • Jess

    and she’s right because when you think about it, this whole movie is about women raising their standards,but then they put chris brown in it????? seriously?? maybe i won’t be going to see this movie after all. thanks malinda williams for making me think again!

  • Tricia

    The name of the book was not meant to be taken literally actually, but by women thinking like men, women would protect themselves and not rush as “some” women tend to do when faced with a new relationship, or any relationship for that matter. Women need to be analytical.

  • Tricia

    Also I don’t agree with people seeing that phrase “Think Like A Man” as being sexist. I don’t really see it as a bad thing.

  • brandon

    she is probably mad bc she didnt get a part in the film. she sounds bitter

  • LuvIt289

    Totally agree. Only cuz ppl will talk the title as seriously as they took the book.

    Sidenote:Awww she’s looks so cute! Luv her! :-)

  • befree

    Steve ” I have been married 3 times” Harvey is the one writing a relationship book towards women. He’s the one who should not be taken seriously.

  • http://LorMariesplace.com LorMarie

    You cannot possibly be serious. You’re questioning this woman’s past relationships in favor of a man that can’t seem to hold a relationship together? And you’ve got the nerve to say that this man is trying to help women? Yeah, you’re probably the type that will take career advice from someone that always seems to get fired. Seriously, think logically about this.

  • Laugh

    Sounds like a whole bunch of you responding havn’t even read the book or even seen the movie. If you did you would know its not a literal title. Oh and the movie was actually pretty great your loss if you don’t go see it for yourself.

  • Lana

    Steve Harvey’s book was straight trash, encouraging black women and men to play games with each other instead of being who they really are. I won’t see that garbage ass movie because of the book and because they would cast someone who calls black women “broke ass dark hoes”.
    A black woman would have to have no respect for herself or other black women to support that crap.

  • Tonton Michel

    “If God wanted us to think like men, he would have formed us from Adam’s brain instead of his sensitive rib. – stay in your lane.”

    Her responses sounds pretty old fashioned.

  • The Taker

    Yeah I agree. I just looked at her comments and was like “O.K. then”.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Toya-Haynes/547489699 Toya Haynes

    When people respond like this to the book and the movie, it lets me know right away that they really haven’t read it and don’t understand the premise. The book does not say to carry yourself as a man but to understand how men think. In no way does it say to lay down who you are as a woman and assert yourself as a man. This is part of our problem: we assume and we don’t listen. We get too easily offended and don’t hear the entire story. No wonder we are where we are in relation to one another as men and women!

    The movie is a great movie and I want to encourage everyone that has ever enjoyed any movie that Taraji P. Henson, Garbrielle Union, Michael Ealy, has ever been in to go see it. Don’t let any offense keep you from supporting these great actors. They need our support.

  • lynette

    I’m not mad at her for this. I personally thought the movie was pretty funny but it felt like a constant commercial advertising his book every 5 seconds. Thank God Kevin Hart was in it or I wouldn’t have seen it either. On a scale of 1-10…to be fair I would give it a 7.5 because Kevin made it so funny and enjoyable to watch. BUT I just felt the movie played into the same stereotypical roles (e.g., playa’, baby mama’, corporate exec with a bad attidue, etc.) And he kept advocating for women to lower their standards (e.g., get with a guy who still lives with his mama…the guy that doesn’t even make half of what she makes…a white guy (no black men left)…and the playa (only try to reform him rather than dump his sorry arse!)…lol!!…I’m all about women having realistic expectations about daing but not to the extinct of lowering their standards. Yikes!

    I think Steve Harvey means well in helping women in relationships (or is rolling in the dough!) but we have to be careful at who we are dating because we have to raise the next generation. I agree with some of his points but no man can tell you how to date. I’m pretty sure there are a few male secrets that even Steve Harvey won’t share! LOL!

  • lynette

    edit: dating

  • QueenOFreality

    ” Many studies have shown that men are dealing with the same issues as women of desiring relationships, but unable to achieve them. ”

    I’d love to see an article on this…. ON THIS SITE !

  • asha

    she damn right. man these days always out of place.

    an if we have to get down and dirty to d nasty hurtful truth…lets go

    as far as i concern american black men are the LAST to be critical of their black women.

    every voice of them i hear they always have something bad to say bout their woman. the only time she good in their eyes is when she half naked and excited for his penetration. and even then he doh always show any sense of respect.

    they have no right always being so condescending and disrespectful to their women when delinquent fathers is a current pandemic, endemic, plague and every other word among black american families

    the LAST people to correct relationship behaviours are these men

    black women holdin down the home by herself and not doin a good job cus it was never meant to just be she!

    little boys know yuh place, become men and start protecting our children

  • asha

    yeah girl we not takin notes but i will tell you many a woman writing it down…it just should not even be in the psyche….we just need to get it together…all these relationship laments and sob stories…black people get it together!!!

  • iQgraphics

    ugh.
    i agree with what malinda says and I’m not into supporting this book but do appreciate black actors.

    I don’t think you should defy nature to attract a mate… which is something very natural.
    The concept is silly and contradicts itself.

  • http://queenxofxthexburbs.blogspot.com Lynaya

    Women only have to think like men when the men ain ‘t doing so. The males in the movie (yes I saw it..and liked it) all had issues that they needed to deal with. Those issues had nothing to do with women. At the end of the day it’s something to be taken with a grain of salt. It’s entertainment, not the gospel. I watch movies to laugh. I read the Word to know how to think.

  • pink

    I’m reading all these comments and thinking….BOTTOMLINE….. A lot, and I mean A LOT of women can’t find a man to date; much less marry. So if some advise comes from someone that has experienced life on many levels (in this case Steve Harvey)…look and listen….use what you can, and discard any of the advise you aren’t interested in. Otherwise don’t complain when you can’t find, nor keep a man.

  • Dreaming

    I think the problem is, women are finding men to date, just not good ones, because they aren’t open to other people.

  • pink

    And for those of you that are saying; I don’t need a man, or woman for my life to be complete. Perhaps…but I’d rather spend life with a significant other than along. It’s nice to go to bed at night, and wake up with someone in the morning. It’s fun to go out to dinner, on vacation, to a concert, or a movie, or hang out in bed on Sunday morning reading the newspaper with a partner. Not to mention finances. Two people can definitely do better than one.Yeah it’s ok to hangout with the boys, or girls……..but to go home to a partner is the ultimate. Just my opinion.

  • pink

    Stephanie: I’m with you on the god thing. No offense christians; but if life is so hooky doorey with god; and if god wants everyone to have a wonderful life; then why aren’t there a lot more people in satisfying relationships? Is providing good christians with a loving partner all that complicated for god to do? Stephanie I’m also with you in that the movie is JUST entertainment.

  • Dreaming

    The problem with “Act like a lady, Think like a man…” is that there are no books telling men how to better understand women in relationships. How many books are written, giving advice to men on how to better handle things in life?

    Why is it the woman’s sole responsibility to preserve a relationship?

  • pink

    Modernlady: I don’t know if Malinda is salty about not getting a part. We don’t even know if she considered a role, or auditioned. But it doesn’t sound like she read the book, or saw the movie; because if she did I don’t know how she came away with her thinking. Neither the gest of the book, or movie is suggesting women should literally act like men.

  • Reason

    You know that episode of A Different World that I believe first introduced us to Freddie’s love interest Shazah should be mandatory viewing for black people. For those who remember and got it, Shazah was an independent author hustling a book to the black women on campus that purported to be a fix for black gender relations but actually, inevitably ended up polarizing everyone. I was only 10 or 11 when the episode originally aired, so I didn’t know the episode was based on a real controversy involving a black female independent author-I won’t even attempt to spell her name which is close Shazah’s name-who wrote a book for black men called The Guide To Understanding the Black Woman that some say suggested violence against black women. I do remember the author in question because she was always appearing on various talk shows to give her incendiary opinion on interracial dating. Anyway, that episode ended Shazah bringing black women and men united against him after finding out he was making bank off their division. That episode still holds up today. And instead of another movie about how one side can best understand each other, I would like a movie that expounds on that episode of A Different World where black female and male characters join forces to exact revenge on these authors who exploit their pain. That would be so original and fresh.

  • MarloweOverShakespeare

    “I read the Word to know how to think.” AMEN AMEN AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!

    I do the same to know how to think, live and LOVE.
    This comment is IT!

    #thankyouthankyouthankyouFather!

  • NY’s Finest

    I recently saw and loved that episode. Shahrazad Ali is the author of that ridiculous book and it’s shame that even today that piece of crap gets so much praise.

  • MG

    She doesn’t know what she is talking about. The movies isn’t about Steve harvey’s book, or thinking like a man.

  • apple

    Boooo Malinda sit down just cause you didn’t get a part.

  • Dreaming

    Oh, it wasn’t? Based on the reviews I have read, many people were saying that the movie was like an informercial for his book.

  • GSTAR

    Yeah the Chris Brown thing is a bit suspect but I have a feeling that Chris Brown didn’t beat up Rihanna. First of this incident happened on Grammy Weekend. If you notice all the drama happens on Grammy Weekend (Whitney Houston Suspicious death which many believe was a blood sacrifice). Its suspected that Rihanna was initiated and Chris had to take the fall.

    It explains why she has no problem going back to him because they know the truth. Its all the behind the scenes twisted games about the Music Industry for those who are enlightened. Research it!

  • Yb

    No, “GSTAR” read the police report, then look at her battered face. Research it!

  • GSTAR

    The police report has nothing to do with it. They been doing this shi*t for decades. They know who they have on payroll!!!

  • lovelygirl

    Many black women arent married because they refuse to expend their options (date men of other races); they except being baby mamas instead of wives, they date men less educated then they are and who are no or low wage earners; they spend to much time reading books like this, they get bad advance from single women or women who are notorious for choosing deadbeats.

    If you want to marry, dont limit your dating options to only black men. Dont be apprehensive about ending bad relationships. Dont date baby daddies if you’re not a baby mama. And most importantly date men on the same page as you ( value-wise, education-wise, and stability-wise). DATE MEN WHO CONSIDER MARRIAGE IMPORTANT AND THEIR ULTIMATE GOAL. And stay away from books written by a man who believe black women have to save men. Dont go into relationships intending to be a man’s mother.

  • Dreaming

    Right on.

  • TruBlu

    Maybe if she thought like a man she would still be with D-Nice or Mekhi Phifer.

  • secret6

    Good response JoJo. It isn’t that serious. He’s not telling women to stop being women, but he’s emphasizing the need for women to take into consideration how a man would think in certain situations. A woman’s intuition is already a powerful thing, which, as Steve himself puts it, is God’s built in radar for women to be able to protect themselves from the ‘hunters.’ I don’t see anything wrong with receiving some additional advice from someone who’s been there done that, as opposed to someone who’s basically played it straight.

  • secret6

    Though I can appreciate the credentials of Dr. Buckingham, I wonder how ‘experienced’ is he when it comes down to some of the drama that Steve speaks of? Being that I haven’t read his book, I cannot question what he speaks of, but oftentimes we have a tendency to place a lot of weight on the words of someone who have names that begin with ‘Dr.’ I’m sure his publication provides a lot of good info, but I also wouldn’t discount the words of someone who has had some ‘dramatic’ relationships, or whose name doesn’t begin with ‘Dr.’

  • secret6

    I wanted to respond to Pink on this one. It’s not that God has a problem with providing people with loving relatiohships, but instead it is most likely because many people make themselves unavailable for the relationship they say they want. How many women, will admit they are currently involved with someone who they, for some reason, think they can influence and ‘fix?’ How many of these same women continue to have one child after another with men who not only does nothing for their children, but won’t provide for other children he may have with other women? How many women allow these men to cheat on them over and over, but for some reason feel compelled to confront the other women they’re messing around with, as opposed to kicking his sorry butt to the curb? Or worse yet, how many women move these men in with them, goes to work everyday, only to come home to find him sitting in the same spot on the counch with the remote in his hand? How many women are turning down men because he doesn’t drive a BMW, make 150k per year, is too short, not tall enough, is dark skinned, not light skinned enough, don’t have good hair, straight teeth, an MBA, etc.? We cannot blame our own bad choices on God. In order to receive what you want, you have to not only be available for it, but you also have to be willing not turn someone away, who may have the qualities you want, because he didn’t come in the pretty package that’s been imagined.

  • http://hotmail Sowhat

    Then what is the book about? Have u read it? Maybe u should, then u will see the the book is based on the movie! He said it himself on his morning show.

  • http://www.thecolorcurve.com TheBlackGuy

    I (think) I understand where Malinda is coming from. I get that some women don’t like the idea of having to think like a man; they are obviously more comfortable with being who they are as women.

    Steve Harvey’s book and following adaptation is about one thing: women understanding how to spot men who are out to “play” them. That’s it.

    This cuts the weeds but it never uprooted the real issue: why men want to “play” women in the first place. Its not so much the gaming, but the question of why we have to play the game in the first place. Women want to be women and I would imagine they want to “exhale,” having the ability to be vulnerable and trusting without having to wonder if he’s only trying to hit it and quit it.

    There needs to be more dialogue on how men can improve their philosophical imagery and symbolism of the women that exist in their lives. The more progress is made on that front, the less we need books like what Harvey writes.

  • Alexandra

    She made a good point, maybe with a little bit of shade.
    I don’t agree with assigning certain thoughts to gender. But you don’t have to be open to all advice.

  • http://www.thecolorcurve.com TheBlackGuy

    Because there is a social message that forms the philosophy that relationships are what women prefer, not men. It is the women who want the ‘one good man’ the ‘wedding ring’ and a ‘long term relationship’ and all the guy wants to do is hook up and be out.

    And most guys don’t read.

    And why do they have to? We men are in a position of being able to enjoy all the benefits of a relationship; hot plates, sex on a platter, good convo when we need it, a shoulder to lean on… without BEING in a relationship. We don’t need any insight on how to get what we want, we get what we want AND some. Thanks sisters!

    Just kidding, guys want the same things women do. We can develop the mentality to want the same things, but that’s another convo for another time.

  • Mz.Muffinstuff

    Chris Brown played a douchebag & his part was small. I personally, wouldn’t allow his role to stop me from seeing it (which I didn’t) Saw it on Friday; I enjoyed it and so
    did the boyfriend.

  • Mz.Muffinstuff

    Co-sign :)

  • grateful

    this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Lanette

    I am going to think like the woman God made me. Steve Harvey is not a relationship expert.The man’s been married at least 2 or 3x. Men like Him write books like this because women buy it..he doesn’t do it because he cares about women. You buy it so he sells it..

    Men should write advice books for men …I am a woman I will never think like a man because God didn’t make me a man…and he makes no mistakes.

  • http://method2hermadness.blogspot.com/ girlformerlyknownasgrace

    @Dreaming, phsshhst! Guys don’t read! They view magazines with big boobs or butts on them. When is the last time you saw a man read a self-help book? Matter of fact what type of man would admit to himself that he needs help?

    Men do not change. Women change. You just have to find a men that is good, and that fits you, and you will not have to change or for them.

  • lovelygirl

    women know a player when they see one. it’s not that these men are wolves in sheep clothing. it’s just women choose to stay with men who are mistreating them.

    And the men who choose to mistreat women (not all men wish to do so) know which women to go after. Decent men are not attracted to women who have a history of choosing deadbeats.

    it’s easy. people have to stop making life harder for themselves…it’s about choices and personal responsibility. Deadbeats (men and women) shouldnt get any play.they are easy to spot and should be ignored. difference between men and women…’good’ men will wife ‘good’ women (i have yet to see a ‘good’ man marry a hoodrat). too many women (good and tired women) will date and have a baby for (not a baby WITH b/c most likely he will bounce) a deadbeat then complain that there arent any good men out there.

  • ashely

    There is a saying like this “Only one himself knows if the shoes match his feet or not”。If you really love her /him, race, color or age. ain’t nothing but a number for these loved-up A-Listers. My BF and I both think so! He is a black .We met via _______Blackwhiteplanet,,C0′M____, For hot and sexy singles online dating. If you are interested in meeting lovely beautiful interracial single, you have reached the right place.

  • MrTruthTeller

    I think she’s upset because she didn’t get a part in the movie lol

  • lulu

    the blackguy’s comment was right but most women dont want or chose to ignore to believe for their own means-

  • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

    You just had to go there, didn’t you? LMAO!

  • lynette

    Now this is good stuff….I was just telling someone the other day there are so many things we are missing in relationships today. Steve Harvey is just a pimp making a dollar out of our pain….plain and simple! There is a reason why there are so many people claiming to be relationship experts and writing books…because there is a need for it. But why is there a need for it? Let’s go deeper into why we need books like this in the first place. Most of us are human beings…we know how to interact with the opposite sex…how to date…so what is really the problem?

  • BFDuster

    How about a book called “Think for Yourself; Think Like Yourself”? If someone wrote that, I’d totally read that.

  • @Work_Bored

    Just go watch the movie, its a movie enjoy it and if it changes your views so be it. If you find it ridiculous but hilarious congrats you’ve been entertained!

    Saw this movie last night and i cannot stop thinking about it!!! i plan on seeing it two more times no lie! lol

    I realized i was engaged the entire time, nonstop laughter for the whole two hours and i cried lol twice. I swear this movie had me running through all emotions. I totally saw my boyfriend in Michael Ealy’s character.

    I’m so happy it made 33 million opening weekend, the cast was perfect and Kevin hart Hilarious!!
    I left the movie theatre wondering when the hell this is coming out on DVD!

  • Trey

    Sounds like a hater to me…that movie was hilarious and relatable. It was so refreshing to see black actors outside of the tyler perry formula, and I want to see more of it! Idk about the other people that saw the movie, but there were definitely several situations that I or my girlfriends had experienced at some point during our dating lives.

  • http://www.one3snapshot.com ceecee

    I agree with Malinda. I went to watch the movie NOT to support Steve Harvey and his ridiculous book but to support the great actors and actresses that were cast in the movie. I hope they get paid very well.

  • tmc

    I agree as well. The joke is on us (well, those who took this book to heart); Steve Harvey is a comedian. Period. If anyone wants to read a book about how to manage a relationship, they should read their Bible.

  • lovelygirl

    Agree. I go to The Word for guidance and Im happily married with a healthy baby.

  • serwaah

    saw movie with my girlfriends on weekend and I enjoyed every moment of it. It was funny from beginning to end. I haven’t read the book and will not be reading it either, I took to movie to be a movie and NOT some life lesson session on how to improve on myself or my relationship. I’m fine within myself and have never wanted a movie to teach me how to behave. Maybe in my teens I read a lot of Iyanla’s books to get through the tough times most people go through as we emerge into adulthood, but I know myself and accept my self. It was good laughing and enjoying a good movie that tried to touch on some aspects of relationships.
    I’m still a woman, mother, wife, friend, daughter etc etc etc. All the actors did a good job.

  • http://www.fashionforjojo.com Ebony

    Truth. Forget thinking like a man. Love yourself as a woman and a lot of theses scenarios wouldn’t even be able to take place.

  • http://www.thecolorcurve.com TheBlackGuy

    @lovelygirl Oh I beg to differ on the statement that women don’t know they are being played. I don’t think that’s the case. I think some women really are being manipulated and deceived out there.

    Steve Harvey isn’t a pimp (lol) we use that word TOO loosely and a real pimp is a criminal who throws women to the street for sex. That’s not what he is.

    He really did write that book with good intentions and I imagine it’s helped women find out some things about themselves and men. It just doesn’t uproot the real issue is what I’m tryna say.

  • nicaw

    While I understand what she is saying, that women should be women, I do believe she’s lost the true meaning of what’s being conveyed. The point of the book (I haven’t seen the movie yet) is that women understand men and their way of thinking. If women “think like a man” they are better able to create and live by their own standards and not fall prey to the guy who only wants what he can get from you.

  • nicaw

    Plus, and understand I don’t mean to throw shade but…

    Just like there have been comments on Steve Harvey having been married two or three times, Malinda Williams is currently separated from her 2nd husband.

    My advice to people is to stop being so literal and look at things for what they are — for you.

  • Tra

    Someone sent this book to me when it first came out – I stopped reading after the first few pages and if offered a billion dollars to tell you what I learned – I’d still be broke!! LOL!! With that said – I’d still like to see the movie, I hear its really funny!

  • gmarie

    sounds like someone is upset they didn’t get called for a role..

    Whatever the case, people are taking the idea of the book WAY out of context. The book is not telling you to think like a man, it is helping you to understand how men THINK! There is no denying that men and women understand things differently, and we both communicate differently. The purpose of the book is to see that you have no misunderstanding of events while dating you understand his intentions, and you project yourself in a way that ensures he understands yours.

    all that aside..it’s just a book/movie folks. you can always choose not to read it

  • Elaine

    Maybe Steve should have named the book and the movie “Think” and then all of the opposers would get it! You have don’t have to think like a man to have a great relationship you simply have to “Think” The book was information for those who needed it but the movie is for anyone who has an open mind. Enjoy your own life!

  • gmarie

    @LorMarie wouldn’t that make them two peas in a pod? I’d say so..

  • Mo

    True. besides taking relationship advice from a man that has been through a few baby mamas and wives seems like a punchline in and of itself. On the other hand, a man like that is the best person to tell women who dont know any better what signals to look out for lol

  • PJ

    Elaine, I absolutely love you comment.

  • Blasé

    CRINGE – “he would have formed us from Adam’s brain instead of his sensitive rib. – stay in your lane”

  • Whatever

    @Jojo

    Excellent Points!

    I love Malinda and actually thought she would have been great in the movie (Taraji or Regina’s characters) however, with almost as many divorces as Steve Harvey she’s not in a place to give advice either. Ladies and Gentleman it is just a relationship book.

    Aside form steve and the book, the movie was great. Better than most romantic comedies I have seen lately and hilarious as well. The book nor the movie actually tell you to be a man or think the way men do… it is more like “Think from a man’s perspective of things”. Many women I come across and many articles I read in magazines and on blogs ask this same question as well. What women doesn’t want to know what her man is thinking???

  • Whatever

    Actually the book does NOT do that.

  • Roberta

    This right here.

  • http://www.Educate-Empower.com BNWW

    What’s more bothersome is that folks are flocking to see this film and making no mention of the n-word use. What a disgrace! We are in BAD shape… http://banthenword.org/news/publish/BNWSnapshot/Think_Like_A_Man_-_Mediocre.shtml

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  • pink

    ceecee: You probably went to see the movie like most other people did; because they were curious. Why some people are trippin on Steve is beyond me. Most people don’t trip on other movies, or tv shows they watch. They usually don’t say oh I’m watching this tv show because I want to support so and so, or I’m not watching bc I don’t support so and so. Steve doesn’t care if you, or me doesn’t support his book or movie because for every person that doesn’t support…..3 others will. I’m glad for any successful person; and no I’m not saying we have to agree with eveything that’s written. Personally I don’t take it that serious……it’s just entertainment

  • pink

    tme: The bible has nothing to do with this

  • pink

    Lovelygirrl: I’m so glad that you have a happy marriage……..good for you; but believe me millions of women have been looking to god and the bible for decades…….and a good many of them still don’t have satisfying relationships, or marriages. Thus the guidance of the bible is a MOOT point

  • http://www.Lilyinc.net Lay’Di Cleopatra

    This reminds me of the tabloids. Nobody admits to buying it but it’s a million dollar a year industry. The movie grossed millions and the book did well as well. People called in on talk shows to ask for advice, so who’s the fool? As far as paying to see something you are just curious about or has such disdain about proves further just how unwise many of us are. Malinda Williams, do you think god approves of how you wear tight revealing clothes in movies? I ask this to make a point. All of us have and do things that other people think is ungodly. Stay in your Lane? What lane is that?

  • poesie

    @tmc you are right on point the bible is the only voice I listen to for relationship advice. If people would stop living in sin then maybe their love life will be better. But most of them are too selfish to see it and they wonder about STD’s, abortions and stuff. Marriage between a man and women just like God intended for life and nor for just a short time. Bible principles are here to help but only if you truly follow its advice and that means no sex before getting married but to many that’s impossible they rather take advice from fellow sinners and fornicators… what a way of life… God’s kingdom is coming and for those of you who fornicate, your life is the result of the selfish I, so don’t blame God.

  • Erik

    oooh, looks like Malinda Williams is mad because she’s one of the few black actresses that wasn’t asked to be apart of the cast! :P

  • shon

    Malinda Williams really? Malinda Williams really? Isn’t she the single twice divorced mom, neither marriage making it past two years. Husband #1 publicly announced that they pretty much got married because she was pregnant and that he is a very sexual person and couldn’t be satisfied with one woman. The ink wasn’t even dry on her divorce from husband #2 before the big announcement that his jumpoff was 7 months pregnant. And she says that she has a god given ability to think like a woman. LMAO. Okay How is that working out for her? LOL. With her horrible and publicly embarrassing relationship track record she should have been first in line to purchase this book. I’ll personally purchase a copy and send it to her.

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  • Marilyn Burks

    Very Interesting!

  • D

    Dreaming, there are the b.s. “Pick Up Artist” seduction community sites and things like The Game where men basically learn to manipulate women into the sack, plus the burgeoning “men’s rights movement.” Haha. So I think there are books men read about understanding women, just books on how to control them in order to sleep with them. There are a lot of things on the internet like that for men. It is upsetting, to me.

  • D

    I can’t spot men who are out to play me, so… especially if they act like they aren’t. It’s hard to tell if someone won’t walk out even if they say they like you or if they actually want a relationship. Plus, there’s a decent amount of self-deception going on in women, at least me.

    I actually read the Steve Harvey book in the library (picked it up randomly, it is a quick read) and it upset me, less so than other books of the genre. But, one thing that stuck with me is the idea that women need to make clear their standards early on. Like, if you are looking for a man who is religious/a man who wants children, say so early on. It’s an interesting idea. Or that women are overstepping their own boundaries (“changing the rules”) to keep men. I think that’s true. Also, another thing I found interesting is his idea that a man is only truly ready for a relationship when he has become the man he wants to be/has his career ducks in a row/that they are more concerned with becoming the man they want to be than with settling down. This I’ve found to be true, unfortunately.
    I know that as a woman I find it a no-brainer necessity to work on getting my sh*t together career-wise and work on finding a good relationship. I tried to be one of those “work on yourself and eventually a good so and so will come to you,” but I’m just not wired that way.

  • http://www.tamaratwhite.com Tamara

    I agree with Malinda Williams to a certain extent (love her by the way!!!). I am not a fan of Steve Harvey’s book. His advice is antiquated and I think in large part sexist. However, the movie “Think Like a Man,” is cute. I really enjoyed the movie and Kevin Hart was brilliant! There are so many movies out that depict images of black people that I don’t know. It is refreshing to see a light-summer film that is funny and has characters that we can all relate to. Thumbs down on the book, but thumbs up for the movie and its talented cast!!!

  • pink

    shon: OUCH!!! I feel yeah….but you didn’t have to be so hard on her. LOL LOL

  • chinaza

    She has the right to her opinion.
    I don’t know why people crticize Steve though for telling the truth.But a lot of women want a fantasy not the truth.Then it all falls apart and they wonder why.

  • Simone L

    PINK: If you don’t agree with ceecee’s and tmc’s posts, fine. You are entitled. But it’s not that serious to try to strong arm everyone who you don’t agree with. And YES the bible is the best book to teach us how to love our mates!! Fall back, son.

  • @Work_Bored

    @ Shon,

    he he he I love it! why do we try to bring down our own? its just a book read it or don’t, no one cares! watch the movie or you don’t. Just shut up with the negativity and congratulate the fact that the movie was a success!!

  • megan

    get over yourself it was entertainment and on top of that i’m sure she (malinda) has played in some roles people would think would take her out of God’s grace. the fifty cent video for one. Another thing thats why so many black women are single they don’t think out side the box or think about them selves as some one else would see them.

  • pink

    megan: I know you didn’t say (all); but believe me (most) women aren’t single because they don’t think outside the box, or bc they don’t think a certain way. Bottomline is a lot of single women are single bc they can’t find anyone to date because men don’t approach them. There are many many reasons why….but the overwhelming factor is you have to be approached first.

  • pink

    megan: For example I always look at the many beautiful black actresses that aren’t dating, or married to someone. Many of them say it’s because men don’t approach them. Some men or intimidated by them, or think they are so beautiful…. so surely they already have someone. The same thing happens to educated, well put together (physically, and mentally) women.

  • pink

    chinaza: Yeah I don’t know why some women don’t want to hear the truth, and face the music. Part of it depends on where a person is in their life. One of my friends was married when Steve’s book first came out and she said oh I don’t want to read anything Steve has to say. One year later she was divorced….read Steve’s book, and loved it. Maybe she would have learned something if she read it early on (and who knows….but maybe her marriage would still be intact)

  • pink

    And for the record I’m not saying Steve’s book is the gospel…..but it does have very good advice, and insight as to how some men think. And in my many years of experience….his insight is right on spot.

  • pink

    Simone: Sorry but we can agree to disagree. If the bible was the answer then zillions of women would have been married a long time ago (or at least dating someone…and they’re not……in multitudes). It’s a hard pill to swallow….but it’s true. But you keep hanging in there with your bible. And for the record I am not trying to be negative….the dating situation for many women IS WHAT IT IS, and we need to face it.

  • Martishia

    That’s was ignorant of her to say!!!! SHE OBVIOUSLY HASN’T READ THE BOOK!!! No where in the book did Steve tell them to LITERALLY THINK LIKE A MAN!!!! The concept was to not be so easy or self served!!!!!! Girl wonder why you was only a hit for ONE show!! It would be someone like this who throw dirt or say ignorance on a movie who has been #1 2 weeks straight!!!!!!!

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