How many of you have encountered that colleague at work who, for whatever reason, thinks that working together entitles them to information about your personal life. These people are the ones who have to be quickly reminded that you two are co-workers and not friends.

It is true that we spend the majority of our time with the people that we work with, but it doesn’t mean we have to be the best of friends. Any job I start I maintain this approach to keep work and my social life separate. Some people get upset because when they ask me about how my weekend was I simply say, “It was fine,” and leave it at that. That is all the information I feel needs to be given and I shouldn’t be made to feel like an outcast because I don’t want to discuss every aspect of my life.

People usually will find someone they become friends with at work or a click that they hang out with during lunch, but it is not mandatory. Being polite, keeping to yourself and doing your work is all that matters. All the friendship stuff can be a waste of time and end up with you being in the middle of office politics or drama. It amazes me how many work places are more like high school cafeterias with the amount of gossip and back biting that goes around. I rather be seen as anti-social and keep to myself then trying to be the cool person at work.

Business and pleasure usually don’t mix well and this is especially true in the work place. You should never feel pressured to share more information about your life than you have to with people that you work with. If they want to call you boring that is fine because your REAL friends know the truth.

  • commonsense

    It is commonsense to keep your professional separate from personal because some people will use your information to keep you from climbing the latter. I read a article about co workers a friend today is a foe tomorrow. Keep in mind everyone has bills to pay and you can only expect people to put themselves first.

  • notnow1

    I agree with one of the posters who stated: “I have come to realize that people just need people to talk to.”

    That is absolutely true!!! Most people do it just to fill the void of being bored or just to kill time. From experience, I see many coworkers gossiping about other coworkers all the time and that is definitely not a good thing….so I tend to keep to myself and not share too much. One of the team leads at my job said I was anti social, honestly I don’t care, because I know I have my reason. I do not come to work to make friends nor do I come to work to gossip or cause drama. I have way more better things to do with my time. Some people will always have that high school mentality and want you to ride along with them.

  • LorriK

    So, I have a question about this. It seems that the boundaries we keep sometimes hinder us from fostering enough of a relationship to move up in the job place. I wonder if our “private” I don’t share too much info can backfire at times in a negative way? I believe in keeping it to myself, but I also learned that being too distant creates imagery that you may not be a team player or friendly enough.

  • Rebecca

    Thank you!!! I like to do my job then go home! And that’s how I like it! I like to focus and do a good job not discuss what I’m doing on my day off or what kind of music I like. My job is a high school everyone thinks I’m shy or quiet no it’s because I’m actually doing my job instead of bitching out another employee. I work so I can enjoy my time and money outside of work not make friends. I’m actually considering leaving I can’t stand it with the questionnaires anymore their loss I actually like to do my job.

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