Mother-Daughter Moment: First Period

by Stacia L. Brown

Who remembers the episode of The Cosby Show where Rudy starts her period? “There I was in English class,” she quips, “The teacher’s talking about punctuation… and I get my period.” She mortified and wants to downplay the whole thing, which isn’t a reaction to which Clair–the mother that, frankly, most black girls reared in the ’80s wished they had–is accustomed. She wants to lavish Rudy with attention and make her menstrual inauguration a big to-do. It’s a tradition–one that Rudy’s older sisters eagerly welcomed and encouraged her to milk for all its worth. After all, Vanessa even got lunch at the Russian Tea Room.

This may not have been one of the series’ classic moments for you, but for me, as a viewer born the same year as Keisha Knight Pulliam/Rudy and thus hitting all her milestones in tandem, it’s emblazoned in my memory.

I saw the episode after I started my own period. I remember it as a startling, pre-sunrise experience. I shuffled groggily to the bathroom, eyes still half-sleep slits, only to be jolted awake by a bright blot of blood in my Day-of-the-Week underwear. I felt momentary panic, even though about a year before, a gym teacher or school nurse had separated our fifth grade class according to gender and explained to all the girls that this day would come. It was different, in real-time. I called down the hall for my mom. She was already in the throes of her morning flurry, getting herself ready for work. She looked at the blood, looked up at me, went into a cabinet, and pulled out a maxi pad. “That’s your period,” she said.

It was a truncated version of a conversation we’d have later, when time wasn’t so crunched. I don’t remember the details but there wasn’t any triumphal celebration involved.

I didn’t even know that was a possibility–that you could be delighted about your period or that your mom could be–until The Cosby Show. What a novel concept.

Now that I have a daughter, I’ve been contemplating how I’ll break all kinds of news to her about womanhood in general and black womanhood in particular. Periods were pretty traumatic for me; they were always accompanied by raging cramps and occasionally punctuated with vomiting. Even two decades after their onset, even after I’ve experienced firsthand the benefits of their regularity, I still have a hard time associating them with joy.

In fact, in talking to my peers and older relatives, I’ve realized that their first period moments involved rejoicing. Some recalled their mothers weeping–but not happily. They were worried over their daughters “becoming women,” over their ability to bear children now, regardless of emotional readiness. They were mourning the loss of their little girls, dreading the looming sass and rebellion attendant to puberty. Or else they were very matter-of-fact about it all, sometimes referring to it as The Curse, and sometimes reducing it to a simple, utilitarian act the body must perform, whether you want it to or not.

In light of responses like these, The Cosby Show’s treatment of black women’s menstruation was revolutionary.

These days, the doomsday approach to discussing first periods is, hopefully, a thing of the past. Modern mothers feel more comfortable treating periods as less of a cryptic punishment and more of a bodily function whose symptoms can be easily managed (or even suppressed for all but four times a year) and a social rite to be celebrated, not feared.

I’m constantly finessing my future First Period Speech. Granted, I’ve got close to a decade to finalize it; my kid’s not even two yet. But I already know it will involve long gloves and ornate church or derby hats, petit fours and high tea, an evening at the theatre. And perhaps, just for laughs, we’ll watch this novel little Disney short I discovered for the first time last week. It’s from 1946 and was used as an instructional video in schools until the ’60s. Even though some of the info is obviously outdated, I thought it was alternately adorable and really informative for a grade-schooler:

One thing’s for sure: the word curse will not be uttered.

Do you remember how your mom handled your first period? If you plan to become a mother, do you intend on using the same approach, if you have a daughter?  

  • LemonnLime

    Yes I remember. I got mine 7th grade. I’m the oldest and my mom makes a big deal out of things and i was DREADING having her make a big deal out of it so i plsnned not to tell her. When it happened I already knew what it was. I just went to the nurse and got some pads. For about 3 days my plan worked well, I just lived off all those sample they give out to kids in the sex ed class. Then I ran out and had to go to her. Jesus you would thought someone died with as much crying she did. She was like “you can’t trust me?! I thought we had a good relationship?! Am I a bad mom?!” I was like no you just make a big deal out of every little thing, kinda like now, and I didn’t want to deal with it because it’s just a period and I just need pads… nothing more nothing less. God it was rough.

  • Anonymous

    I am not sure how i will handle the situation when it is time for me to have kids if I have daughter. I would love to do a rejoicing of sorts, something that wont make her feel bad and celebrate so to speak my own experience was whatever to say the least.

    I was 12, had just come back from Fedco with my grandma(think early version of costco or bjs) i was having horrible cramps but I had no clue what was going on. I remember i literally fell out on the grass in front of the house b/c I was in so much pain lol i pulled myself up and went to the bathroom and tada it was there. Well i didnt tell anyone, I went to my room and got the pads they had handed out at my school during that talk put one on and that was it. I dont know why i hid it but i did & I use to hide them in the trashcan extra wrapped up.. this went on for a year until i became careless one day (13 yr old now) and my grandma found out. She wasnt mad but just started buying for me. fast forward another 3 years, im now 16 and my mother finally found out. she was pissed i didnt tell her (to say me and my mother have a rocky relationship is an understatement but tahts another topic for another time) and I was then put on punishment for 4 months. one month for every year i didnt tell her.

    soo umm yeah thats my story and I hope if i have a daughter hers will be completely different

  • Dreaming

    She didn’t handle it.

  • Stacia L. Brown

    Wow. Your experience sounds traumatic, and I’m sorry you had to go through it. I think it’s interesting that in both of the cases shared here in the comments, there was a compulsion to hide the start of menstruation from the women around you. I’m sorry you got such a bad deal, with the punishment. Did that shape your attitude toward menstruation in any way?

  • Stacia L. Brown

    After your mom called down, how did she respond/what did she say? Was there a big speech or anything? If you decide to have children and they’re daughters, will you be as direct with them as you felt when you started (i.e. “no big; you just need pads.”)?

  • Sasha

    What do you mean when you say she didn’t handle it? Like she just flew off the handle when you told her or just was like oh okay whatever? Don’t mean to be nosy just curious.

  • HowApropos

    My mother was very much involved, and the school that I attended made the boys and the girls separate for a day, so we could watch films on our reproductive systems. Afterwards, we were given the ‘starter kits’ and mine sat in dust under my bed until i was 12.

    I got mine during a trip and while we were driving home, I was hopped up on Tylenol, but no water, so when i got home, it was all over the floor, and I had the worst cramps known to man.

    This is also when my mother was more worriesome and strict because ‘I was a woman now,’ and she just knew that I’d be pregnant one day. This is also when I set out to prove her self-fulfilling prophecies wrong. Fast forward many years later, we were able to talk about how I felt and how she felt when i got the menses. I totally understand why she was the way she was. My friends are going through it with their teenage daughters.

    When my niece had hers, my mother, sister and I became a loving support network for her to feel comfortable enough for her to ask us question without being brow-beaten.

    Great article.

  • Stacia L. Brown

    Great *response.* Thanks so much for your feedback–and I love your family’s “sister support circle” for your niece. It would be so great if more of us did this for our younger relatives.

  • Tameko P

    My mother didn’t handle it well either. I was matter of fact about it and thank goodness she didn’t traumatize me like the other reader’s mothers did! I can’t imagine getting punished for not telling about your period! That’s messed up. I only wished I discovered tampons earlier. My mom was sure that I would get Toxic Shock Syndrome when I started using them at 26!

  • Dreaming

    My grandmother found out and then she told my mother. That was all. No talks or anything.

  • African Mami

    All I can say was that when it started I told mom to take me to the emergency room because I had developed an abnormality overnight that only a doctor could solve not her!

  • slim

    I told my older sister first because I was afraid I did something wrong. Noone warned me or ever spoke about periods with me so I was in for a shock when I saw blood on my underwear. My sister was all excited and even hugged me when I showed her lol. My mother was a little hurt that I didn’t come to her first but then she called all my aunts to inform them I finally got my period and she was good.

    If I have a daughter, I will sit her down one day and explain it all to her so she won’t be as shocked as I was. These girls nowadays get their periods so early..its scary.

  • JoJo

    I am very close to my mother and it has always been this way ( I am the only child). I got mine the summer before going to 8th grade. I think she was waiting for that moment because nearly every 13 year girl we knew had a period, so it was just a matter of time. She was home that day and I remember running to her with the stained underwear ( weird, I know) to show her what I found and she was calm about it– she handled it like a pro. She didn’t look scared, so I wasn’t either. I only remember telling tell her not to tell my dad. My mother has a unique way with words. Later that afternoon she said, ” don’t let boys touch you over here (she pointed) because bad things can happen now” I did not ask further questions. And for some years, I did not allow boys to touch me “over here” like she said. Lol. She helped me put my first few pads on ( I couldn’t get those suckas right at all) and for a year or so, she would shop for all my feminine products because I feared holding “that stuff.” in public places That’s one of the many reasons why I love my Mommy. She is truly super, and it is no surprise to many that I have a strong desire to have a daughter in hopes of sharing the same bond my mother and I share.

  • Anonymous

    I was 10 years old in the fifth grade and was so pissed! I tried to keep telling myself that it hadn’t happened. I just kept on changing my underwear, hoping that there would be no more spots. My mother was washing clothes and saw all the spots in several pairs of my underwear and asked me if I had my period. I was so embarrassed, and said no, with tears in my eyes. My mother then asked to see my underwear and then told me, that’s your period. She said you better be glad it happened at home and I saw it, you wouldn’t have wanted it to have happened in public. I was so mad. She then smiled and got me pads. I remember my mother saying you’re a woman now. I knew my mother had told my father, because a few hours later my dad came into the room smiling and gave me a hug. HOW GROSS!

    My mother and I had had several talks about menstruation prior to my first cycle. My mother even bought me a book and read it with me. I have ALWAYS and will FOREVER hate my period. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a beautiful Black woman but my period has caused me so much discomfort and too many embarrassing moments!

    However, I do believe my mother handled it very well. I will probably do the same with my daughter and buy her book about puberty and discuss it with her. I do however want to make sure she always has pads and a tide to go pen wherever she is.

  • M.G.S.

    my mother & i had (& still have) a close, honest & open relationship. we talked about sex, sexuality, reproduction, & other topics before my period came up. the summer i turned 12, my body changed. from no breasts to raising up off the mattress when i was on my stomach kind of change. from no hips & wearing Levi’s to curves & Esprit (at that time) which fit my new body shape.

    so when my cycle started, my mother decided to have a party for me. we’d talked about what the transition would mean, and she also educated my friends as the same time. they were invited, i had cake, ice cream, and a few close friends & family. we also had a “girls day”, where i got to choose a special place to eat, and got new underwear (panties & bras).

    i remember it fondly because it was a time to honor my new self, a young woman. i loved the idea of special undies & stepping over to something new. i felt more responsible about my body, how my bath/bathroom time was what i wanted it to be (shower, bath, new soap, etc.) i wasn’t taught that my period was dirty, or that i was dirty…

    i carry this tradition with my nieces, god-daughters & other female children in my life. but it’s only if they want it to be. they choose what makes them feel most comfortable. i am the one they come to for information, education & a safe space to talk. that is the greatest thing my mother gave to me that summer. a safe place to simply be & be comfortable about my body.

  • OSHH

    Wel my mom had been talking to me about the changes my body would be going thru, so it wasn’t a shock or even big tadoo. I was 11.

    BFF’a oldest daughter has just started @ 10 and BFF cried not in front of her daughter of course. I totally understood though because they grow up so fast and once the period starts they aren’t so little anymore.
    I think it would be cute to make a tadoo out of it though if I ever have a daughter.

  • LemonnLime

    After she called down and stopped being mad, I had a sit down with her and I just told her I am a private person and I didn’t want her telling everyone like my grandmas and making it a big deal and the reason I just kept that to myself was because I knew she would take it personal and freak out like she did. Either way i was going to deal with a mom that freaked out about something. So we came to the agreement that if I tell her something and I say it is private it means it’s private. Also she wasnt going to freak out if about everyl little miles stone (at least while I’m there) and she wasn’t going to take it personal if I keep things to myself bc she knows if it’s serious I would come to her.

    I don’t want kids but if I did I would just try to be matter a fact about because hopefully I will have taught them about their bodies like my mom did. But there most def wouldn’t be crying or all that craziness. It just a period and it the first in a long line of hundreds you’ll have.

  • Stacia L. Brown

    That’s amazing! Okay, now I’m considering changing my imagined First Period Speech/Moment. lol

    A party–with cake *and* friends–and new “grown” undie purchases? YES.

    How wonderful! Thanks so much for sharing your experience here.

  • Hello-Dora

    I started my menstrual cycle in the 7th grade on my way back from our end of the year field trip. I spent that night over at a friends house and the next morning I went home and told my mom. I remember her looking at me and saying, “You know, you always try to be so grown”! The experience filled me with shame and made me feel like I had done something wrong. I spent my early days making a mess of myself as I had no help from my mother and was too nervous to speak to anyone about it.

    My mother and I have always had a rocky relationship mainly due to my constant accusations of being molested by my step father, all which were later proven true in my teenage years. I began being molested at the age of 4 and have always felt disconnected from my womb. So every month when my cycle comes around It feels me with deep sadness and grief for a mother I never knew, the love that I never had, and a regular painful experience that I could never overcome.

    Not sure if I will have children, but if I do, I’d like to think that I could cater my response to these type of situations to the personality of the child.

    Thanks for creating a space for such a lovely discussion!

  • binks

    Actually, my mom didn’t handle my first period because I was kind of nonchalant about it so she came in after the fact. When I had my first period I already knew what it was, what I should do and how to handle it so it didn’t come as a surprise or shock to me. My mom didn’t find out until after she washed my clothes, though I wish I would have been open with her the moment it started she still ran down the facts and information to me (which was a bit awkward) and was rather calm about it. I think my mom was kind of hurt that I didn’t come to her but relieved because she knew she raised a smarty pants…lol

  • kaya

    I was on a road trip when I was 12 and i had very bad cramps. I didnt know anytttthiinng
    About periods so i didnt understand what was happening to me and i panic when we made a stop to the restroom and saw the blood, the minute the words left my lips i knew i did something terribly wrong – she said its my period, told my aunt who told everyone else. Then when i asked her what is that she said and i quote “you can now get pregnant ” and walked away.
    Yeah. In rl I don’t actually said the word “period” every once a month im “sick” i dread it and pretend it doesn’t even exist until a couple of days I am about to “get sick” again.

  • Candi83

    I got my period when I was 10 and my mom didn’t say too much. I knew what to do in terms of using pads, so I was ok without her instructing me. A few months later out of the blue, she finally decided to say something about it. She just said, “Now that you have your period, don’t have any boys playing down there!!” She said that statement in a kind of mad, pissed off, accusatory tone. If I have kids, I won’t make the same mistake as my mom did.

  • Dalili

    LOL! Yeah that sounds like something you’d say! Greetings Baby Sis! Hope all is well with ya!

  • Dalili

    Ha, mine stared when I was nine with no warning whatsoever while I was in boarding school. My mum hadn’t had the period conversation with me, so I hadn’t the foggiest idea what was going on. My dorm mother and matron (school nurse) stepped in and explained it all. My mum did talk to me when I was home for the holidays…..the most I remember was the talk about separating underwear….you don’t wear your period underwear on regular days. LOL!

  • Insight

    LOL I thought I was dying when I got my period (I have two brothers). I was 11 or 12 and I remember coming out of the bathroom and showing BOTH of my parents (I always saw pads underneath the sink, but I thought it was just weird tissue things!) and they kind of laughed at me and my mom explained what it was.

    I remember after they told me I was like, “Do I have to go to school?”, and they both said “Yes…??..”. I was hoping I could use this as an excuse to skip school (Why not milk it?) LMAO.

    Its a hate/love relationship. Its gross and uncomfortable, but your thankful when it shows up every month (Not because your having so much sex, but your period can stop for other medical reasons too, i.e. too skinny or too obese, etc.). Its funny because one day when we are older, we will be sad to see it go.

  • Anonymous

    @Stacia no it didnt shape my view of menstruation it just was what it was :) one of those “growing up” things i was expecting to happen. i wasnt freaked out or anything when it happened either because I knew what it was. I dont know why I hid it one again, but it wasnt traumatic :) i just thought damn i have my period now

  • Anonymous

    oh and as for the punishment, that didnt effect anything either, that was typical in my household for minor infractions, as i stated to say me and mothers relationship was/is horrible is an understatement, the funny thing is im 30 years old and reading these comments is the 1st time ive ever even considered that my getting on punishment wasnt normal …you all have certainly given me something to think about and reflect on

  • Anonymous

    this is such an awesome experience and story, I love this idea of the new undies and a party of sorts. If i have a daughter one day I would def do the new undies thing

  • Toni

    Thanks for sharing your story. I hope that sharing your story with us brought you some comfort :)

  • Stacia L. Brown

    To echo Toni, it was so brave of you to share this. I’m sorry this happened to you and I hope the day will come when your cycle doesn’t cause you sorrow. You are strong to have survived the abuse and you are powerful enough to use your voice. I admire you for that.

  • chanela

    Oh gosh! my mom is the exact same way! i started my period and she immidiately told every coworker and family member. i went to my mom’s job and this man she works with is like “so how does it feel to be a woman now?” everybody was effing asking me that. ughhh

  • ImElmoAndIknowIt!

    My two daughters are toddlers, but by the time comes, they will know what they are experiencing and we will have our own version of a ‘Period Party’: an initiation/coming of age celebration.
    The women in our family had one for our youngest sister when she got her first period. She was adorned with a crown made of flowers, we showered her with meaningful gifts, shared our own first period stories and let her gave her the opportunity to ask questions etc. We had her favorite foods and most importantly, we shared with her the joy (eg. can birth a nation) and responsibility (eg. can birth a nation, lol) of being honored with menstruation.
    It is a tradition I want to continue with my girls and theirs and theirs etc…

    Oh, and to answer your question about my own 1st period–it was unceremonious.
    Me: I got my period
    Mom: Ok, did your sisters talk to you about it?
    Me: Yes.
    Mom: Ok.

    At the time I was relieved that it wasn’t any more awkward than it had to be, but as an adult I am saddened because I know at the time she was so overwhelmed with life stresses that she was relieved to not have to go through the period motions she probably went through with my three older sisters…(sigh)

  • Zanele

    Yes, that is the same as me. I love my Mum and I am so glad you have a fabulous relationship with your Mum, too. I am not an only child, but my first period was not traumatic or anything. I am so sorry for all the other women writing here who did not have such a pleasant experience growing up by the sounds of it. :(

  • African Mami

    @ Anon,

    You and I —–>HATE the period. If there was a mistake I think that happened, was the period in creation! I friggin hate ittttt, and I even sing about my hate for it!

  • NY’s Finest

    I got my first period on my 12th birthday. My mother and I already had the talk so I wasn’t shocked or anything I was just completely pissed that it had to start on that day.

  • Jazz

    Me and my mother were actually anticipating mine because I was a late bloomer. I didn’t get my first period until I was in 9th grade. I remember the day exactly I was in home room math and went to the bathroom and ta da there it was. I was so excited ( I obviously wasnt aware of the side effects of a period) until I got home and realized my mom was working late that night and only my dad was home. I was SOOOOO embarrassed to tell him to take me to the store to get pads it was damn near tramautizing lol Me and my mom were happy about it mainly for the simple fact I thought something was wrong with me because I was such a late bloomer. So it was a big deal to us.

  • Trisha

    This is a good article. My goodness I will never forget that hot summer day in August. I had just turned 12 in July. Then I remember hearing my grandma tell my mother she is going to be starting soon. So I was actually under watch for about three weeks. So for me the transition went pretty smooth, but my sister (seven years older) had an extremely hard time accepting it. She was just as dramatic as she is now. Since my sister starting sobbing as if I was dying, my brothers found out what was going on. Eventually the entire family knew. When my granddaddy found out, he couldn’t understand how I was already like that. That became a discussion within itself. It also turned into a ripple effect. One of my uncles called home. He was concerned because his daughter hadn’t started her period. It was a crazy day. I was just mad because EVERYBODY knew.

    My mom finally talked to me and my sister alone. I guess my sister had to come along for whatever reason (haHA). My mom talked about being able to have children now, being cleaned, and explained where everything was. I do wish it could have only been my mom, my grandmother, and my sister that knew. So if I have a daughter one day, I would prepare her before her cycle begins. I would for sure have a celebration because it is a very special moment. I would tell her father, but I would leave it up to her to talk to him about it. I had noticed the men in my family became more protective. I think they need a little more time to allow that information to absorb. :)

    Over the years, I have learned and accepted the women in the family are always going to know. We can’t help but tell when our babies start their first period. We look forward to it.

  • Precious

    My mom and I are very close. She explained menstruation about a year before I had my period. She always showed my the pads and made sure I knew how to put one on. I just always thought it would be forever until I had to use them. So, whenever she explained it, in my mind I said, “Yeah, yeah. I know, I know. ” So as I was taking a shower womanhood began and my conscious said, “Noooo.” I was angry and I thought this happens now; I don’t want a period. How am I suppose to play at nine years old with a pad. I said to my mom “Now I have to wear these pads, just great.” My mom on the other hand was elated. I’m thinking what’s so exciting about this; it’s like wearing a diaper.

  • Alesia

    I remember my 12 year-old self waking up one hot July morning to use the washroom, when I saw all the blood on my underwear (I felt it while I was asleep but I thought I was sweating, LOL). I automatically knew what it was and what to do. I cleaned myself up, got on a pad and kept it moving. After breakfast, I called my mom at work (we were at home with my Aunt) and told her what happened.

    We’ve never had a conversation about periods, but thanks to school and my inquisitive mind I knew what it was and how to handle it. She asked how I knew it was my period and if I knew what to do, I told her “yes”, then she said “welcome to womanhood!” and asked to speak to my Aunt. I knew she told her because after speaking to my mom my aunt smiled at me broadly and said “Congrats, baby girl!” and that was it.

    My mom and I are very close now, but my mom is not really good with certain subjects, neither is my dad, so all I can say is Thank God for health class (taught me about sex, puberty, periods, everything… parents never touched those subjects at all!).

    I was so happy to get my period, and I am still very grateful for it (as it is a sign of good health) but I really do have a love-hate relationship with my period. Some months my PMS symptoms aren’t as bad, and they go away within the first day, but other times I suffer tremendously both emotionally and physically (mood swings, breakouts, back pain, severe headaches, nausea AND diarrhea) for the first three days! Still, I’m happy I have healthy monthly periods.

    I hope that when I have children, they will know that my husband and I are their primary source of information when it comes to those things, and they won’t have to learn it all through library books, and sex-ed like I did.

  • Alexandra

    My mother didn’t explain it to me until after I had it and she was kinda upset because I tried to hide it from her. I didn’t know anything about menstruation before that. I only remember one of my brothers telling me about something he learned in health class, where girls bled during puberty. I was so grossed out and I said something like ‘never me’, and he told me ‘all girls get it stupid’.

    And a year later, I had my first period. I was 10 and it was summertime. I had forgotten about what my brother told me and ignored it. I threw my underwear in the trash, put on a new one and went back outside to play. Next thing I know, I hear my mom calling for me down the street with a sad look on her face. She asked me why I threw my brand new underwear in the garbage. I was scared to explain, 1). because I wasn’t sure what was going on with my body, 2). her being upset made me uncomfortable.
    Then she pointed to the blood in my underwear and asked me if I knew why that happened. I said no, then she sat me down and explained for an hour, why I would continue to bleed and what I needed to do when it came again. I was relieved. I was never really close with my mother when I was young (we are now), but from then on I felt more comfortable talking to her about certain things.

    If I ever have a daughter, I’ll hopefully explain to her what menstruation is before she gets it, especially if she’s developing fast. That’s the only thing I wish my mom would’ve done, because I developed really early.

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  • Ashley

    I woke up one Sunday morning before church to use the bathroom, and I honestly thought that I had “crapped” on myself. I panicked and ran to my mom. She said in her southern accent “Lawd, ya got your period.” My dad was right there. It was weird. LOL My mom called her sister and said “Hey girl, Ashley got her period.” Like it was some celebratory moment. LOL My mom had already told me about pads, and that I should never use tampons because I may get Toxic Shock Syndrome and die. The funny thing is that I remember it happening while I was in the 7th grade and all of my girlfriends had gotten theirs. I wanted to be like them so I prayed to God that my period would come. When it came, I went to school and ran down the hall to my friends yelling “I GOT MY PERIOD YA’LL.” They were so happy. We jumped around in a circle. Ahhh, childhood. HAHAHAHA!

  • Krysie

    I was at my dad’s house when it happened and I called my mom. I remember the exact conversation. I told her, “My stomach hurts”. She replied, “Did you start your period?” I said “Yes”. She says, “O my God!” and then a long pause followed….

    Later that day when I went home I wasn’t really explained anything but was assured that this sort of thing happens to every women and it is normal. I bet the early stages of that fateful conversation will be similar when I tell her I am pregnant.

  • Sue

    @African Mami, LOL! But I’m sorry you had to go through that, I had a friend that thought the same thing because no one had told her anything. To add insult to injury, her mother was on a business trip so it was her father who had to deal with it. He actually took her to a doctor because she said she had a serious problem…

    I’m glad my Mum had explained the changes way before. Still,I wished I would be the exception somehow…SMH. I noticed a stain one chilly morning when I woke up and went to the bathroom. I already had pads given during one of the lectures organized for all the girls at school. Still, it felt inconvenient and scary She gave me some painkillers to take incase I had pain which came in handy because I did. She told my aunt who came over, pretty excited–I wasn’t because I thought it should be a secret. But looking back, I’m glad someone cared enough to make a big deal of it.

    My first period lasted a few days and then disappeared for months and I was thrilled. That break gave me time to get used to the idea psychologically.

  • Sue

    Wow, such a beautiful story. I also like the idea of new undies, practical and celebratory at the same time.

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