Are You a Daddy’s Girl?
It’s common knowledge that a daughter’s healthy relationship with her father bolsters her self-image, her confidence, and her ability to develop trusting relationships with the opposite sex. What’s less common is meeting black women who’ve been able to take full advantage of those benefits, with a loving, consistently accessible dad.
As research and a preponderance of anecdotal evidence indicate, the black community has “daddy issues.”
Still, black women who consider themselves the apple of their daddy’s eye aren’t nearly as scarce as we’re being led to believe. I grew up with plenty of them: daddy-daughter dance attendees, cotillion girls whose fathers formally presented them to polite society, girls whose fathers quipped about shotguns when they were old enough to date or whose fathers ensured they had used, practical cars by junior year of high school. In college, their fathers whooped and fist-pumped at their graduation and emptied the hefty contents of their off-campus apartments onto their backs. They co-signed home loans, provided down payments, and bragged incessantly about their brilliant daughters, whose entry-level jobs in advertising may as well have been akin to directing Super Bowl commercials when they were finished describing it.
Dads and daughters who get along well, confide in one another, and weather their differences in healthy ways are really sweet to see, together in action.
With Father’s Day coming up this weekend, now is a great time for Clutchettes who have great relationships with their dads (or who are just loyal to them to a fault) to weigh in on what it’s like to be a daddy’s girl.
Let’s work toward shaping a more positive narrative about black women’s relationships with their fathers.
Here’s your space to tell us about your favorite dad moment, the best advice you received from him, or how you feel about your adult relationship with him.
(Please note that more complicated and/or problematic relationships with fathers will be explored later this week. If yours falls into that category, please refrain from discussing it here.)
I’m a proud Daddy’s girl!! My father is my best friend, my confidant and the greatest contributor to my sounding board. He is the first person I call in any matter and the one who understands me the most. He loves to learn and ever evolving which I truly admire about him.
He has given me so much great advice over the years but I think the one piece that sticks with me the most is “Always take care of YOU first, take care of your spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health otherwise you have nothing to give.”
As of today, my greatest memory is from Valentine’s Day this year when he drove two hours to surprise me with gifts. I will cherish him always. Love my Dad :-)
My pops is my one of my besties, mommy is other. Taught me how to drive a car, change my own oil, ride a bike, and stuff like that. When I got married he cried harder than my mom.
My dad taught me all the normal super daddy things (how to read, tie my shoelaces, fly a kite, ride a bike w/o training wheels, snap my wrist when shooting a basketball, parallel park, manage finances). He has been my security, disciplinary, teacher, coach, confidant, comic relief, bank, AAA roadside assistance, best friend, and so much more. He has given me so much love, security, spiritual knowledge, relationship/life advice. Even as a young adult, I love that my father is constantly challenging me to be a better person.
I’m a daddy’s girl all the way. When I had a really bad break up, my dad was the one who consoled me & told me that I dodged a bullet. My dad calls me every morning to give me an encouraging word before work. My mom is my best friend, but my relationship with my dad can never be replaced!
My dad was the greatest albeit losing him when I was 15 y/o.
Even though he came from a hard place, he taught my older brothers and I not to go where he came from and to learn from his mistakes and not become statistics (his words, not mine).
With me, he never wanted boys that he didn’t trust around me and he ALWAYS wanted to meet the parents of my new friends and become familiar with them.
This used to irk me when I was younger but as an adult, I’m truly grateful that it was him that my mom procreated with, LOL