Mother Beats Son’s Bully Up On The Schoolbus

by Yesha Callahan

As a mother, there are two things you don’t do. You don’t talk about my child, and you don’t hit my child. I am the quintessential “momma bear” and proud of it. When my son was in 5th grade, for the better part of his school year, he experienced bullying from a classmate. This classmate was 2 years older than him, but was held back previous years. One day after school was dismissed, the boy once again picked a fight with my son, but this time my son fought back. The principal called me the next day and informed me about the incident and told me my son wasn’t in trouble, but he did schedule a meeting with the other boy’s parent.

Even though my son stood up to his bully, he feared retaliation. The next day I made it a point to show up for dismissal. Sure enough I noticed the boy approaching my son. I immediately ran up to the boy and grabbed him by his backpack. All of the kids looked shocked, and I heard a few, “Ohhh, that’s Jaden’s mom.” I asked the kid to tell me where he lived, because I planned on showing up to his house. He refused. So I followed him home in my car. I confronted his mother about the incident, told her what was happening for weeks, and she took matters into her own hands. As she closed the door after our conversation, I heard her tell the kid to grab her belt. Did I feel bad he was about to get whooped? Maybe a little, but better her doing it than me. After that incident, he’s been a welcome visitor in my home and has been friends with my son ever since. But he’s still deathly afraid of me.

Unfortunately confronting a child’s bully doesn’t always go so smoothly. Take Felecia Phillips, 35, of Bunnell, Florida, as an example. Felecia is currently facing child abuse charges after a school bus brawl was caught on camera and says she has no regrets about going after a teenager she says was bullying her son. Felecia’s 15-year-old son, Terez, was being tormented by his 17-year-old bully, Justin. Because she was worried about her son’s safety she escorted him onto his bus, even before they could board the bus, Justin allegedly started arguing with Terez. Things got heated and Felecia smooshed the teen in the face. “Words kept going back and forth or whatever, and he called me out,” Felecia said. “And I smooshed him in his face or whatever,” is what Felicia told NBC Orlando affiliate WESH.com. The teen then slammed Felecia onto the ground. Felecia then allegedly followed him onto the bus, grabbing his hair as the bus driver yelled that she needed to get off the bus and other students tried to stop the brawl.

Felecia was arrested and charged with child abuse and trespassing on school property. Her bond was set at $2,500. After paying bond, she told Florida’s News4Jax.com she felt Mickens got what he deserved. “That’s what they need; a good old-fashioned whooping,” she said. “We’re not able to do that because we end up in jail — child abuse charges.

Although Justin was also involved in the altercation, he was not charged, because according to the deputies, he was fighting in self-defense. Terez feels proud of his mother, and is glad she stepped in. “I feel great about it because I know a lot of people wish they had a mom that had their back,” he told News4Jax.com. “Some parents, when you tell them, they just ignore it.”

Let’s repeat that again: Some parents, when you tell them, they just ignore it. I can definitely see that as a huge issue when it comes to bullying. I’ve heard other parents tell their kids to handle it on their own, or let the school handle. Although there are anti-bullying policies in schools, what do they really accomplish? Most will hand down a suspension or detention, and only severe bullying will get the authorities involved.

Hopefully this incident will teach this bully a lesson, and also others that may have been on that bus. Lesson #1: Stop bullying Lesson #2. If you bully Felecia’s son, you’ll have to answer to her.

  • Patti

    I would have protected my son too, to my own peril if needed. I always tell him if he’s wrong he’ll deal with me, but if he’s not at fault I’ve got his back 100%. Kudos to that mother for stepping up, but maybe she should have handled it a little differently. Besides these teens at 17 and older are not afraid to fight, shot or mame (sp?) a parent in the pursuit of their agendas.

  • Patti

    that should have said shoot or maime…passionate replies overrule correct spelling sometimes

  • African Mami

    My blood, you touch him or her,IT IS ON AND POPPING!! We can laugh all day,but there are certain lines you don’t DARE cross!

  • Yvette

    Eh, some of the details of this story aren’t adding up for me. While I do believe that the son had been previously bullied, something sounds fishy and plain wrong about what happened on the day of the incident between mom and the bully.

    Mom says she escorted her son to the bus and the bully immediately started arguing with her son. I don’t believe a child would do that in the presence of an adult, especially if the adult is the parent of the person you’re supposedly bullying…sorry, just don’t believe it. What I think happened is SHE started arguing with the bully, lost her cool and assaulted him. When she got slammed to the ground, she became embarrassed and followed him onto the bus and assaulted him again. I agree that she should have been arrested, sounds like she attacked the bully first and he was protecting himself.

    I’m not excusing the bully’s behavior though, he should definitely be punished for his actions against the son.

  • Downsouth Transplant

    it would have been a bus to knowwheresville might quick, the bus driver see’s my child being harassed does nothing, i tell the school about it & nothing is done, same old same old! it’s about time i took my mommy responsibilities quite seriously and sorted out this wayward child & the school district once & for all, listen to the son’s statement he is proud his mommy did something about it & had his back, I hope my son will say that of me one day, What is you parental responsibility if you do not protect your child!

  • Fireant

    So what now, If your child gets in a fight at the school bus stop or in school, if your baby loses the fight the child that wins the fight is a bully and the parents of the child that lost the fight gets to beat up that child. Hard to believe what comments from so many think that this is ok with them. This 35 year old mother should have been kept in jail until she cleared a physiological examination by state doctors. No parent has the right to beat up someone else’s child. Reading many articles about this and this women Phillips is changing her story trying to justify how she is right. The Video is the proof and the school bus driver will testify when this goes to court.

  • Leonard Smalls

    It is a quite unfortunate fact that a sizable number of low-income Colored people resort to violence rather quickly in situations that call for rational analysis and action.

    Alternatively, this parent could have sued the school district for failure to provide a safe environment for the child while the child was in their custody as required by law. However, low-income Colored people arguably too often resort to self-help, which leads them to temporary incarceration or worse.

    Carry on.

  • Ellen

    ” I don’t believe a child would do that in the presence of an adult, especially if the adult is the parent of the person you’re supposedly bullying…sorry, just don’t believe it.”

    Yvette, your statement simply has no bearing on the reality that most people on planet Earth experience with, who you refer to as, a “child”.

    Witnesses to violence mean NOTHING to these people! We live in a world where ‘children’, 17 as this person was and YOUNGER, shoot people in crowded parks during sporting events and during homeroom! No one believes that a woman would deter a violent person’s tendencies, parent, teacher, police officer – it doesn’t matter to a BULLY! Even by your own admission, the mother was possibly PHYSICALLY ASSAULTED by the “child” and reacted to that, You contradict yourself COMPLETELY and most of the events were caught on videotape anyway.

  • Ellen

    Being terrorized by a bully is completely different form a fight! Only a bully would think the two were the same.

  • Yvette

    Hmm, I see what you’re saying about deterrents to violence (or lack of), point taken.

    But it’s still my opinion that the mother provoked the fight and he was defending himself. I doubt if that portion of the fight was caught on video since it happened outside of the bus, though I’m sure there were plenty of witnesses.

  • MimiLuvs

    Just by reading Yesha’s memory about her son’s bully problem brings back memories. When I was a girl, I was too bullied by a boy that shared a bus ride. I was too afraid and surprisingly embarrassed to say anything at first. My mom, uncles and father had done the same thing, after an incident where the boy split my bottom lip from punching me. They all made a visit to my bully’s house. They spoken to his mom, who in my opinion feigned ignorance about her son’s behavior. It was scary for me to see, at the age of five. But the bullying did stop.

  • http://gravatar.com/kubuli MW

    Yvette, before I moved to New Orleans I would have been inclined to agree with you. However, so-called children these days are getting involved with the law earlier and earlier (my professor was car jacked at gun point by a high school student in his school uniform) and aren’t being raised by responsible adults figures who teach them to respect authority.

    While I don’t condone this mother’s actions, I do believe she was acting solely as an agent for her victimized son. I grew up in a Caribbean household and everyone at school knew (and we attended private ‘white’ schools) not to mess with us because not only would our parents get involved and handle it on one end but if an issue persisted, one could expect an older, intimidating cousin to make an appearance.

    Instead of aiding violence, this mother (albeit in a controversial, and I think misguided way) taught her son that she (not his fists, not a weapon) was his recourse. Bravo to her, a fully present parent.

  • Patience

    Do you mean psychological exam? Physiology is something different.

  • luvlife289

    Wow, those kids will remember that day…

  • Dee

    I don’t know if you’ve been around kids this age recently, but many of them have absolutely no respect. They are not afraid to step to anyone parent, child, or teacher. It’s sad because when I was younger if one of my parents came to the school and talked to a bully of mine whatever beef I had would have been squashed, but now that’s usually not the case.

  • Yvette

    @Dee- No I suppose I haven’t been around kids this age, I guess times have changed. Thanks for the clarification.

  • LaNubiana

    When I have children, I sure as hell protect them including from bloody bullies. You go momma!

  • Ms. Information

    A child called my friend who is a teacher a bitch in class this week at a school in Atlanta, you are underestimating some of these kids.

  • Blaque217

    Sadly, my son will never be able to come home and tell me if other kids are mean to him or if he is being bullied. He is 12 years old, has Cerebral Palsy and is unable to talk. I get riled up when we are out in public and people are staring at him, pointing, or acting like they’ve never seen a disabled child before, so if I thought he was being bullied in some way there would be hell to pay. HOWEVER, they same way I wouldn’t want someone to put their hands on my child, I wouldn’t put my hands on someone else’s child. I would like to think I would exhaust all options…talk with teachers, principals, bus drivers, other parents, etc. Anything but lose control and potentially hurt another child. We don’t live in the wild, wild west. We aren’t supposed to take matters into our own hands. What kind of message is that sending? There are other ways to protect our children other than acting like one ourselves.

  • victoria

    As a former teacher, I agree parents have to take matters into their own hands. Schools are not properly dealing with bullying; parents of the bullies are bullies; and the bullies have rights which makes it difficult not only to expel them, but to remove them from the same classroom. In many cases, it’s easier to be the parent of the bully than the parent of the victim
    I like Yesha’s story. I believe she did the right thing. Im not crazy about the Florida story only b/c I wish the mother wouldn’t have stepped on the bus. However, if she would’ve reported the body slam incident to the police or school, most likely, the matter would’ve been taken lightly. Kids now and days have no respect so I do believe the Florida mom’s story that he attacked her and she defended herself

  • I_4_ I

    I totally agree with this woman. all this talks about bullying is talks. my kids are young but if they ever get bullied, they are already told to self defence. first tell person to stop, second tell teacher, third defend. this off course if the issue continues and i’m kept in the loop at all times.
    if not- make sure that kid goes home with same feeling they’ve been trying to put you in whether it be emotional or physical.
    if they want to be your friend that’s sure is not a way to do it.
    like my aunt said- if someone hits you, hit them back same way so you both go home with bruise and pain.
    good for you ms. felicia

  • Kacey

    I’m more concerned about the fact that this boy (the bully) felt free to put his hands on a classmate’s mom – an adult!

    We’re at a point where children no longer have respect or fear of adults and I blame parents. It used to be that people taught their kids never to raise their voice, much lest a hand, to any adult. Now, parents actively encourage their kids to defy and disrespect grown people. I’ve seen it happen! This is just further proof of how far we [Americans] have fallen as a society.

  • VELITA HILL

    Serves that lil bully right. Yes we as mothers should have restraint BUT when that child stepped up as if he were grown, than he got what he deserved. He is 17 yrs old and problably as big as the mother, who felt threatened for her safety. Good Job mom, I may be wrong to say that but Oh well, it’ll teach his bad A## a much needed lesson!

  • Jess

    I understand your sentiment, but unfortunately we do live in the equivalent of the wild, wild west now – and worse! I went to a high school where a student physically beat one teacher with a baseball bat,leaving him hospitalized with numerous injuries. In fact, it was so bad that it made the newspaper. The teacher never returned, and the student never even felt the need to apologize. It was absolutely ridiculous. Maybe if more adults felt comfortable jumping in to stop violent kids in the act, we’d see less bullying.

  • http://gravatar.com/nolakiss16 binks

    Go ahead mom! If that was me and mines I would put the fear of death into that bully damn the consequences. True two wrongs don’t make a right but these days many kids/teens don’t have respect for their fellow peers nor adults. And their parents are no better, either they don’t care, don’t correct the behavior or see nothing wrong with it and as mention the school can only do so much even when they know a kid is a problem child. If my kid was a bully….whew child he/she would do a complete 180 that the word bully isn’t in their vocabulary. And the fact that the 17 year old laid his hands on my like he was grown already showed his attitude so…

  • http://lah Matt

    WTF this woman had no authority to discipline anyone. The boy was right to fight back, as I would hope anyone in this situation would.

  • Ms. Alicia

    I am a teacher as well. I teacher fourth grade. I had one of my students call me a bitch to my face like it was my name. There was absolutely no consequence.

  • Mike Payne

    K I L L the Bully – AND his Parents (for N O T having it A B O R T E D – that’s what Abortions are for).

  • Eric

    I meant I agree!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/lasaundra.watsonlegate Lasaundra Watson-Legate

    I don’t think you teach children to respect themselves or each other by brawling. The wrong message was sent. The parent should first address school authorities, including the school board. It is their job to educate, maintain order and keep my child safe and it is the responsibility of lawyers and courts to deal with them when they fail.

  • African Mami

    @ Ms.Alicia

    I can assure you if you had reported that kid that called you out your name, and he or she happened to be mine, you and I would be BEST of friends, after the fact. For that kid would have the fear of African Mami, her African ancestors, and her God instilled in them, to DARE try come at you ever again.

  • mEE

    I’m a teacher and I work in a school filled with a LOT of violence, intimidation, bullying, etc. However, ALL the other students on my floor knew not to mess with my kids. I was like a Mama Bear with my students…and for that matter any other student I saw being picked on. They knew that bullying my kids would have me knocking on their class door and that’s a conversation they didn’t want to have.

    Unfortunately, that doesn’t work for everyone. I can’t even tell you the amount of kids I’ve had call me out my name or assault (I’m talking punching, kicking, biting) other teachers. Some of these kids just don’t care. They don’t. Their parents don’t care. There are no REAL repercussions. I always said to my administration that we’re doing our students a huge disservice because they don’t understand real life consequences. They can assault a child or an adult in the school building and get a suspension, but if they do that on the street they’re facing jail time. There was a middle school child who was out for a while and when he came back to school I asked him where he was. He told me with the ONLY shocked face that he got sent to juvie for brawling in the street. I said, “uh yea you know it’s ILLEGAL to assault someone”. His response, “I didn’t know”.

  • http://www.michelleinthemiddle.com Quinn

    I wish they all had teachers like you! Please check out our curriculum to teach real life social skills to your middle school students to help them handle the drama of middle school. It’s easier to teach them how to handle their own problems than it is to handle them for them! Look for Athena’s Path and Hero’s Pursuit at http://www.MichelleintheMiddle.com. Good luck!

  • Pingback: Mother Beats Son’s Bully Up On The Schoolbus. Was She Wrong? | 93.9 WKYS

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