Kordell Stewart Files For Divorce From Porsha

by Yesha Callahan

Kordell Stewart Files For Divorce From PorshaApparently all is not well in the Stewart household. According to Access Atlanta, Kordell Stewart filed for divorce from Porsha on March 22 in Fulton County:

From the filing:

“Petitioner, after marrying respondent, a cast member on the “Real Housewives of Atlanta,” on May 21, 2011, is seeking divorce as the marriage is irretrievably broken.”

We’ve had plenty of Clutch articles on the Kordell’s controlling personality and Porsha’s “not so bright” demeanor, but it’s never a good day when you hear that a couple is getting divorced.

Hopefully this doesn’t turn into an ugly situation for either of them.

 

Kordell Stewart Files For Divorce From Porsha

  • Misshightower

    Hope her “girlfriend/advisors” are there to pick up the pieces.

  • seritatheresa

    And now she’s a statistic too…where did her submission and pedigree go wrong?

  • Writerdiva

    I guess she doesn’t have a picture perfect life after all LMAO but seriously. This could be the best thing that’s ever happened to her. After she heals, she could take this time to really “KNOW” herself. She could really discover what makes her truly happy. She could build a career and find a man who would treat her like a wife instead of a daughter.

  • https://www.facebook.com/pages/Peculiar-Alex/148160701916001 Alex

    Yikes, didn’t agree with the way he shoved his views down her throat & cut her off while she’s talking but I know that has to sting. Apparently she was just fine with the way they were before the show. Pray she’s strong enough to move forward! Reality tv kills only what ppl allow it to so ultimately its what they chose to expose, do and/say while the cameras were rolling. They did it to themselves…

  • mEE

    …that’s harsh.

  • Writerdiva

    ^^^. after LMAO ^^^But seriously, this Punctuation aside I forgot to add that maybe Kordell can finally ‘be himself’ *wink*

  • http://www.facebook.com/mslatina.morris Mslatina Morris

    it’s not her it’s definitely him, he is egotistical, too controlling and it’s a blessing in disguise….thank God for your way of escape,…… hurt, heal, & move forward, but thank God in all things!!!!

  • http://gravatar.com/socoolandtrendy emjay

    If this is true I must say all things happen for a reason. Divorce certainly sucks but imagine if she had children with him everything could be so bitter and drawn out. At this point in her life, she can cut her losses and move on. And now if she truly wants to focus on her grandfather’s foundation, she can do so full time without someone nagging her about being home on time and whatnot.

  • Apple

    I guess submitting wasn’t enough

  • Guest1234

    I was wondering what the HAAYYEELLLL Kordell Stewart was doing, being on this show with this idiot. He was a respectable ball player. I just couldn’t figure out why he would go on tv and make himself look like an idiot. He doesn’t need the money, and his public image was largely respectable. Why make an ass of yourself on TV with some moron of a wife? And I couldn’t figure out what her angle was either. Every other cast member has something they’re selling, so the ridiculous nature of the show was publicity for whatever their hustle is. They’re foolish, but it serves a purposes (modeling, workout videos, Kandis music business, etc…) But now I get it.

    This is a parting gift from Kordell to Porsha. He uses his name to get her on some reality show before he checks out. And she gets on with being a desperate reality chick doing whatever to be in the public eye. Kelsey Grammar did the same thing for his ex-wife. Oh well.

  • Pseudonym

    So, I guess this answers the question that Clutch posed to us last week:

    “Porsha Stewart and Submission: Should Other Women Follow Her Lead?”

  • Pseudonym

    Seriously! Seems like reality shows have become the new form of alimony. Get your non-working housewife reality TV income, then file for divorce when her tax forms for the previous year will show to be a considerable amount of money and, probably, reduce what you’re required to pay. Clever.

  • TajMarie

    When you have to push your views on others regarding your relationship, that says more about your relationship than what it says about what others may think.

  • Blaque217

    This is very unfortunate. Obviously, I don’t know these two personally, and who knows, maybe it’s for the best. But they were a young, good looking Black couple who APPEARED to love each other immensely. Did Kordell come across as controlling? YES! Did Porsha come across as submissive and a little ditzy? YES!!! But what couple is perfect? If we all had cameras following us around, people could find fault in our love lives too. That being said, I wish these two the best, individually and as a couple.

  • Tiff

    Hopefully they can work the situation out – if this report is true.

  • Overseas_Honeybee

    Sorry to hear this but my spidey sense tells me something is up. Not even 2 years in, all on TV and now he coming from out the blue with papers? Nope.

  • http://twitter.com/Cognorati001 Colette Marcheline (@Cognorati001)

    Wow. She’s getting a HUGE lesson in humility in wisdom (so much for the “picture perfect” life). Let this be a less to women who think marrying a baller, whether gay or not (cough, cough), is a ticket to riches.

  • seritatheresa

    It seems Kordell also believes he shouldn’t have to pay Porsha a single cent in spousal support … claiming, “[She's] an able-bodied person, earning income and is capable of supporting herself.”

    Kordell also says there are no marital assets subject to division … which suggests there is a prenuptial agreement in play.

    With husbands like this…why get married. And while we rejoice/poke fun at this, lets remember that this is the end of a marriage, but can we also admit that he treated her like shit?

  • Kat

    I don’t get why he would need to if they were only married for a year.

  • http://twitter.com/Cognorati001 Colette Marcheline (@Cognorati001)

    Did she really mind being treated like shit?

    Let’s be frank: she probably married him so that he could support her financially. Women of all races who are married to sports stars do this .

    If a woman isn’t willing to support and cultivate herself and chooses to be solely dependent on a man, there’s really no one to blame for the inevitable risk.

  • AnnT

    I feel sorry for her. The little bit of the show I did catch didn’t really paint her as having her own independent thoughts, desires, and wants.

    Seems like she played the role hoping for a fairy tale ending that didn’t happen.
    I hope she finds her ‘Private Benjamin” self and creates a life of her own.

  • http://gravatar.com/missinformation7 Ms. Information

    Porscha has a legacy that she can now continue to uphold…her grandfather Hosea Williams devoted his life to serving the poor and he was a scientist to boot. This is a lesson in humility for Porscha who flaunted her lifestyle.

  • Anon

    I doubt she can spell legacy.

  • TheBubblyBlackGirl

    And, apparently he reguses to pay alimony slaiming she is an able bodied working being.

  • Keshia

    Wow! Maybe now Porscha will step into a more adult role, and mr. Stewart can step right on our the closet. I kinda feel bad for Porscha she went on tv parading her lifestyle of happiness now look smh

  • http://gravatar.com/missinformation7 Ms. Information

    lol

  • Wong Chia Chi

    Lmao. So where are all the men to tell Portia what she did wrong, by bending over backwards and submitting to her husband in every way and trying to be a traditional wife?

    Go on. I’ll wait.

  • Wong Chia Chi

    So since HE filed for divorce even after she was “submissive” I guess MEN are the reason why “black love” doesn’t work. Because even after she submitted to him, and played her role, he STILL wasn’t satisfied.

    Tell me again how “overbearing black women who try to wear the pants in the relationship” are the reason why the black community has a 70% fatherlessness again?

    BTW Kordell is gay. He’ll be coming out any minute now.

  • Cocochanel31

    thank you! tHAT’S why I say don’t change just for a man, especially if he not changing for you! smh

  • Wong Chia Chi

    But…but…BUT…I thought that that’s what being a good WIFE was all about. Letting the MAN be the provider and you staying in the kitchen like you’re supposed to…

    Are you possibly suggesting that women should be self sufficient and NOT be financially dependent on a man. No matter how much his ego hurts? But…if we do that…then we’re ball busting bitches who drive away GOOD men.

    I’m confused :-/

    (sarcasm)

  • Tina

    Wow! I didn’t expect to see that. It sucks to be treated poorly by someone and then let them be the one that dumps you. Reality TV is marriage poison. No couple should have that many mouths in their relationship & Kordell’s ego was clearly very fragile.

    Check Kordell’s timing. I guess he’s waiting on the Supreme Court to rule so he can live the life he wants to live.

  • Sheron09

    And this is why most black women do not care to submit. At the end of the day, we will always be treated like sh*t. Porsha, although ditsy at times, was a very sweet and kind woman. How in the world could he possibly find fault with her?

  • Marisa

    OH NO! but Porsha was the oh so dutiful respectful BOW DOWN type of wife and had the marriage that Kenya Moore was oh so jealous of. Once again we have proof that NOTHING is guaranteed no matter how you what you do or don’t do. Being Rosanne Conner or Claire Huxtable types can have a failed marriage just as the Peg “don’t” do squat for her man and family” Bundy types. Must be a sad day for some Clutch folks because Porsha air headed behind has been presented here recently as some model to look up to. Ms Porsha has been trumped as the type of wife that black women should aspire to for why who knows.

    As I will keep saying anything involving another person in life is a crap shoot, the odds are the flip of a coin. Just like a job notice how some of the most incompetent ones keep their job but, competent ones can lose their jobs, reasons vary. Frankly putting your relationship on a spotlight like a reality show is an over all bad idea, every house wife show around at least one or more got divorced or had breakups. Especially if your relationship is already a fragile one to begin with, tv cameras and scrutiny will not help it people. Will be interesting how Porsha goes about her life now will she stand on her own two feet for once or just latch on to the next wealthy dude to hold her hand through life.

  • JaeBee

    Dayum, never thought of it that way, but you’re probably right.

  • Lauren

    I hate to see marriages fall apart. I hope Porsha takes some time to find out what she wants and then goes for it. I wish them the best…oh by the way Porsha being a “submissive wife” probably didn’t have anything to do with their marriage falling apart. Half of y’all don’t even know the true meaning of submission anyway. I’ll give you a hint. It does not mean being a docile, subservient, doormat that only smiles, look pretty, cooks, cleans, and takes care of the kids all day. If you think that’s the definition of submission, try again.

  • MISS_EMCEE

    I knew this was going to happen. In the closet gay men never have successful beard relationships. Porscha girl you should have wore the strap-on’s. That’s one area you wasn’t submissive at chile.Lmaooooo

  • Wong Chia Chi

    You don’t have to tell me twice. Someone Lady at my church tried to tell me that getting married while you’re young and can still attract a wide variety of men was better than getting an education and a career, because even if you get divorced there’s alimony(….UM….no actually).

    I thought that advice was bullshit then and I think it’s bullshit now. Fuck a man, take care of yourself first. No man will love a woman he doesn’t respect. And no one will respect someone who is totally dependent on them, like some kind of child, unless they have serious power trip issues.

    I just love how ALL the men who come here to bash black women and tell us what we’re doing wrong and how every problem in the black community is our fault and ours alone are ABSENT and have NOTHING to say.

    Just like in real life. When it isn’t the woman’s fault, men are too pussy to speak up to/correct another man’s behavior. It’s so easy to blame the woman.

    Black women can’t win for losing.

  • Joan

    That marriage was about as real as Kenya and Walter’s “relationship.” LOL. Perhaps Porsha is just a better actress than Kenya.

  • Tina

    It turns out he’s the one who is not happy even with all of her submitting. He is the one who filed to divorce HER. I know Kenya is somewhere twirling away. I hate to say it, but the reunion show is going to be a ratings bonanza.

  • http://twitter.com/Cognorati001 Colette Marcheline (@Cognorati001)

    I only saw one episode of RHA with Kordell and Porsha and hadn’t even heard the rumors but I COULD TELL he was gay. She knew. The “rumors” have been going around for years and years.

  • Wong Chia Chi

    The thing people don’t understand is that, someone truly powerful, would not REQUIRE submission. If a man is too weak to stomach a woman who is his equal, and he needs someone to defer to him then he’s insecure in his masculinity and he needs to deal with that on his own. No amount of a woman submitting to him will help it because he’s always going to blame her for his own inadequacies. No one should require another person to be weak so that they can feel strong, if they do they it’s because they are WEAK themselves and want to bring others down to their level.. I don’t give a fuck what anyone says.

    People need to stop telling Black women what’s wrong with us as if everything is our fault somehow. It takes two to make kids and maintain a relationship and a community, and one person can’t carry all the burden. And black women been doing most of the work forever and we get next to nothing in return but scorned, disrespected and mistreated.

    I wish people would shut the fuck up about telling us what we do wrong and worry about their own shit.

  • Tara

    Wow. I feel bad for her.

  • http://tontonmichel.tumblr.com/ Tonton Michel

    I like this theory of yours makes perfect sense, every one wins in the end. She gets fame and a potential career, he keeps most of his money and skips out the front door. Can not be mad at that.

  • Marisa

    This the same chick who upon meeting Kenya for 5 mins wouldn’t shut up about that woman’s single status. The only person who was on a high horse was Porsha Stewart, anytime one throws their life in others faces as if its the end all be all and something everybody wants or should want, guess what life has a strange way of happening. Also Kordell barely could contain his disdain for Porsha and she had zero ability to even talk to him about their issues. Barely two years in these two married for the wrong reasons, he wanted a trophy and to quell them DL rumors and Porsha wanted the Mrs of a dude with a name, and some bank.

  • Tara

    They cant even make it work with white women. Even Heidi Klum called Seal a maniac. Just sit back and watch how Kanye handles this Kim debacle. I need popcorn for that one.

  • Tara

    Black women need to take a page out of the white woman’s playbook.

  • http://www.clutchmagazine.com Clutch

    We do allow male comments – just not disrespectful ones. Ones that constantly degrade, down and make false assumptions about Black women.

    We had to start moderating more because of the hatred that was spewed towards Black women. We are over it! Most of the male trolls come on the site to talk badly about all black women and deter the conversation to talk about the issues you have with Black women.

  • http://tontonmichel.tumblr.com/ Tonton Michel

    I don’t feel bad for her one bit, she now has a career in tv and a marketable face as well as a sympathetic position of being the “dutiful house” wife who gets by big old meanie football star. I bet he doesn’t even act like that, they both got what they want.

  • Wong Chia Chi

    @ Your Spirit or Your Body

    That “Iron Fist comment moderation” didn’t seem to stop you though.

    Comment moderation voting is what discourages the trolls, bullshitters and derailers. I think Clutch has one of the better ones.

    My comment was directed at the apologists/concern trolls who blame “matriarchy” for every problem the black community has. If it wasn’t for said “matriarchy” our community wouldn’t be worth a damn.

  • Marisa

    Also I noticed that line in the filing about Kordell not wanting to financially provide for Porsha as she is an “able bodied” person capable of working. Now wasn’t the crux of his complaint was that it had to be a choice for Porsha either a career or family. Reminds of Deion Sanders jive he had basically Pilar was the perfect trophy eye candy, now he’s shouting about getting his name back and he doesn’t owe her this or that. Also people get divorced all the time in this country for a myriad of reasons and that’s the whole point of this whole submissive this or not submissive that, NOTHING is guaranteed so there is no one perfect model that folks should be trying to follow. That’s the point Porsha was trumped up lately as see all yall single chicks you better act like her if you want a husband. You also have to account for the fact the husband is an ex athlete and with well known suspect sexuality, serious lack of communication, Porsha couldn’t even talk to her own husband about her miscarriage, Kordell wasn’t interesting in her feelings, add a tv camera recipe for disaster.

  • Tara

    Except smart, ugly, white Khloe gets Lamar to sign a prenup that is very detailed of what he gives khloe if they divorce.

  • http://www.lillian-mae.com Lillian Mae

    I agree!
    My friend once met a tall, dark, and handsome man who worked for the FBI. Her issue: his teeth!
    I told her a white woman would snatch him up and in the most loving way, convince him to get those teeth fixed!
    WWWWD!
    What Would a White Woman Do, LOL!

  • Wong Chia Chi

    @ BeReal

    Portia definitely has my sympathies. But the only reason other people were in her ear was because of the way she bragged about how “perfect” her situation was: “People think I have a Picture Perfect life. And I do” And I didn’t like the way she talked down to Kenya about her relationships in such a “better than thou” way when her relationship had so many glaringly obvious issues. That might be why you see so much schadenfreude in the comments.

    But I don’t think anyone is really happy that her husband divorced her. I know I’m not. I also don’t think her friends talking to her had much to with the demise of that relationship since her husband initiated divorce proceedings. And she obviously ignored her friends.

  • Wong Chia Chi

    @ BeReal

    It actually is a good thing they got divorced. What good functional relationship ends in divorce? Now Porsha is free to find someone who appreciates her and will treat her better.

  • Starla

    This is a calculated move, seems like dude is making a chess play. She better get a very good lawyer and private detective.

  • Guest1234

    I believe she pronounces it “pit-cher perfect life.” Maaann! This woman irritates me like no other. That accent and high pitched voice!!! Arrrrggghhh!!!! M-kay. I just had to throw a bit of shade. :)

  • RJ

    I saw a blip on one of the cable channels that there is a possibility of a major NFL star coming out of the closet this week. This would coincide with the supreme court deliberation on Prop 8. So maybe it is him. All I know is he was a hell of a football player.

    Anyway,I am not in the business of speculating on one’s sexuality but if he is gay, it could only be a good thing that he is divorcing.

    I also hope that they both can live an authentic life from this point on because quite frankly there is no other way to live.

    God bless them and let them move on in peace.

  • Marisa

    The reunion was already taped but Kordell was a not there while all the other husbands were.

  • Yb

    So……..when are you going to define the meaning of submission Lauren?

  • No_chaser

    In Golden Girls tradition, I’ll get the cheesecake and ice cream.

  • Yb

    Nah. Pathetic black girls like you and Lillian just wish you all were white women.

    What’s the divorce rate for white marriages and IR marriages with white women, again?

    That’s what I thought. Seek help for your self hate.

  • NeverBeenWrong

    OMG – that just made laugh out loud for real, not just a “LOL” in my head.

  • http://www.dawnthescreenwriter.com ScriptTease

    At Marissa, Keep in mind these shows are prerecorded- moooooonths in advance. Things can change at the drop of a hat, but I do somewhat agree about parading her marriage in front of Kenya.

  • Pat

    I was on the verge of watching RHOA just because of Porsha. I’m hoping this story isn’t real. A marriage possibly ending within 2 years, I think that is sad. If they don’t work things out, I’m hoping Porsha gained the strength to support herself, learn about herself, and build herself up during this time.

    We all know love is one of the greatest gifts. However, to be independent is one of the greatest gifts you can give to (yourself). I hope her role on RHOA open other doors so she can begin to have a life of her own. Hmm…but I do wonder what else is brewing in her husband’s pot? Those eyes are sort of shifty. Just judging b/c he didn’t decide just to leave over night. Also want to add, most of time when you are experiencing a very hurtful situation, you only have one or two people who are there for you. So Porsha shouldn’t experience any surprises if she doesn’t have much support from the RHOA crew. I hope she does. I really feel sad for her. :(

  • http://tontonmichel.tumblr.com/ Tonton Michel

    Except smart, ugly, white Khloe is still married so I guess she is winning.

  • ToyaTTBabes

    This guy Kordel doesn’t know who his wife is, she listens to everything he says, always putting him in front of her own self, he is just selfish, which lady nowadays only want to be a housewife, we need our own independence, I would expect better from him, Porsha look up girl, better is ahead.

  • http://gravatar.com/nolakiss16 binks

    I don’t know much about their personalities or marriage to give proper assessment especially from the clips from the TV show. But if I have to guess I think they were just mismatched in personalities and desires in life. Kordell seems the type who wants a strictly stay at home wife devoted to the household/him/kids while Porsha seems to want more than that now especially in the clip where she was crying saying she wanted a career AND kids. I think Porsha didn’t know herself well enough and didn’t think of the role she was fulfilling. In the beginning, she was properly cool with being strictly a housewife and kept woman at first until she saw other options and dreams and he probably thought he was getting a deal with a woman who was willing to submit, seemed a bit naïve and moldable to his thoughts/opinions. I hate to say it but Nene was right in her assessment.

  • Lauren

    Many people forget that submission is twofold. Just as the wife is called to submit to her husband, the husband is supposed to submit to God and love his wife.That means he is to DIE to self and do what is best for his family. It’s not all about him. He is a servant leader that considers his family well being when making decisions. That means that the wife has say and influence into what goes on in the household.

    A wife is also not bound to being a house wife in submission. A husband that supports and loves his wife also supports her dreams. He should want to see his wife maximize her gifts and talents because he should want to see her grow.

    It’s our job ladies to pick a partner that’s worth submitting to. Now if you want to argue that many men out here aren’t worth submitting to, fire away!

  • Nila

    Umm…did you know these people on a personal level? Nobody has any idea what goes on in a marriage except the two people that are in it. What you see on TV doesn’t measure up to what their lives are actually about. I don’t understand how you can be shocked about soemething that you know absolutely nothing about. You don’t really know these people.

  • lol

    thanks Lauren, these women are in here celebrating somebody else’s problems like crazy!

    smh

  • Ash

    This is sad for her but he was extremely controlling and rude to her. She’s still young, gorgeous, and unencumbered (no kids)…I hope she moves on and starts a new career and life.

  • student

    Wait, what? Why is everyone going on about Kordell being gay?

  • http://gravatar.com/khrish67 khrish67

    What? I barely got to know them. lololo

  • JaeBee

    “That means he is to DIE to self and do what is best for his family. It’s not all about him. He is a servant leader that considers his family well being when making decisions. That means that the wife has say and influence into what goes on in the household.”

    Please explain how Kordell exemplified this behavior.

  • Jay Cee

    Portia is a dunderhead and Kordel is an undereducated, ignorant jackass.

  • http://gravatar.com/khrish67 khrish67

    Hopefully she was at least wise enough to get a pre-nup unless she let him talk her out of it.

  • http://gravatar.com/pinklipstick227 pinklipstick227

    Chile, i can’t wait till he makes an album about that one. Kanye is looking for women to solve his issues when he should really be a psychologist.

  • http://gravatar.com/pinklipstick227 pinklipstick227

    They have already filmed the reunion :(

  • mEE

    I refrained from commenting earlier because I was hoping by now the tone in the comments would have changed from this almost drunken glee a lot of the commenters have about this woman’s marriage falling apart.

    I’m so confused about what Porsha did to be on the receiving end of such unadulterated happiness about her misfortune. Is it because she chose to a different type of marriage than we as women of the 21st century believe she should have? Does it make you feel vindicated that her marriage failed because it confirms some notion in your head about how relationships should be?

    All types of marriages fail. Marriages like Porsha’s — or like my best friend’s parents who were married for 30 years, raised children together, made decisions together, had everything equally divided because they both had amazing careers, and made roughly the same amount of money. Or like my other friend’s marriage, she was only married for a year and made significantly more money than her husband and made all the decisions in the relationship. Three separate marriages, completely different, but the common denominator for the downfall was the people in them, not the “type” of marriage they had.

    There’s another black website I frequent for mindless gossip but I choose not to read the comment section because it’s depressing the way the women tear each other down. So when Clutch posts a “gossip-ish” topic I kinda get excited because I know the comments will be funny and sarcastic and witty…and yes some will be nasty and catty, but that will definitely be the minority. In this case, I’m disappointed.

    For some of you so elated that Porsha’s marriage failed, you better hope that one day if/when you have a serious relationship that falls apart no one will be standing there pointing the finger and laughing, yelling “I told you so”.

  • http://gravatar.com/bronxgirl1 bronxgirl1

    Kanye is another one who needs to come out of the damn closet.

  • http://twitter.com/Cognorati001 Colette Marcheline (@Cognorati001)

    DEAD! :D

  • Lauren

    @JaeBee I defined submission. I never said Kordell had those characteristics.Kordell was controlling and selfish. Again, we ladies have to do or due diligence when picking a partner. Every man is not worth submitting to. Obviously Kordell fits within this category.

  • Writerdiva

    It is unfortunate when marriages fail. However, I can’t say that I feel bad about this one falling. This one makes me glad because this is a huge opportunity for her to develop and cultivate her own identity. Per the show, this marriage was a BAD situation for Porsha.

    Slash treated her like she was seven years old, void of opinion, and void of individual thought. He wanted someone to control, someone to look good on his arm and to help his image. Porsha put up with that to live the lifestyle that she’s accustomed to.

    The shades of schadenfreude on the story never would’ve existed if Porsha wasn’t toted and hyped up to be the type of wife that black women should try to emulate in order to have a happy marriage, like another poster stated. This “drunken glee” wouldn’t exist if she didn’t rub her status in people’s faces. Even in the opening credits, she boasted about her “picture perfect life” and taunted Kenya about her marriage.

    Some brothas love to say that black women are combative, not submissive, etc. but here’s an example of submission and for one man, that isn’t enough. This is what happens when you are a model trying to play a role instead of being yourself.

    Porsha should take this time to do what makes HER happy. To make HERSELF better and whole and eventually, she will marry again to a man who will love her, support her, and value her opinion, while being the leader of the house. Slash wasn’t that man but there are some men out there that will fit the bill.

    As far as my future relationship crumbling. Well, I’ll cross that bridge when I get there. If it happens and if someone is that bold to point “I told you so fingers” at me, then I am as bold as they are to point a finger of my own right back at them!

  • Pseudonym

    hEY! I like Khloe (based on what I see on tv). She works hard, looks out for her family, and seems like an extremely supportive wife. Just b/c her sister is a total skank doesn’t mean she’s guilty by association. (and I think she’s pretty- not drop dead gorgeous- but she’s not ugly and her character as shown on the show probably makes me find her even more attractive.)

  • Sweetles

    mEE, you said it all.

  • mEE

    the thing is I never heard Porsha say that WASN’T the type of marriage she wanted. You can’t project your feelings about what you would want in a relationship and how you would ideally like to be treated onto someone else.

    She didn’t say she was unhappy in her marriage — the never been married one, baby mother, divorced one, and the one whose family tried to hide her marriage license did. I categorize them that way to point out the flaws that exist within their relationships as well. I didn’t take anything she said as “flaunting” her life. They all say stupid, outlandish things in their little introduction. What was she supposed to say? “I’m married to a man I love but we have issues just like everyone else, some are harder to work through than others”.

    I don’t disagree with you that Kordell came off as a controlling oaf…but I’m not the one married to him, and some women appreciate that type of dynamic in their relationship. I’m not one of them and you certainly aren’t either, but aren’t we simply faulting her for having a difference in what makes her happy?

  • Writerdiva

    Mee,

    In my perspective, Porsha didn’t have to say that she was unhappy. I sensed it when they were going back and forth about a career or a baby,pick one (WTDTA?) and in that session with Dr. Sherry.

    Here was Porsha wanting Kordell to listen to her just once. She wanted his empathy and he gave her a deaf, apathetic ear. Her face was soaked with tears when she discussed her miscarriage and there’s was Kordell, not saying anything, not give 1/8ths of a damn about her feelings, her ideas. That’s how I came to that conclusion.

    I’m not faulting her for her difference in what makes her happy, but how happy could she really have been being treated like a child instead of a wife? She’s hurting now and rightfully so but, it will get better.

  • Aloha

    Apparently being on any Real Housewives show on Bravo leads to a divorce. From each city, I can count at least one couple from each city that headed to a divorce after a couples appearance on a season. Jeana, Stacie, Deshawn, Lisa etc…
    Way to go Andy!

  • Opinion

    I think that any joking in the comments is moreso because yet another black man theory on why black women are single has been frushed. No it’s not because we’re not “submissive enough” or any other reason they use.

    I think that one of the biggest problems is the high percentage of mamas boys in the black community. No one is ever good enough for them, especially if she’s a black woman. Also the need to control everything — a relationship is a partnership not a dictatorship.

    Mothers, please stop babying your boys!

  • Marisa

    I’ll see your Golden Girls cheesecake and raise you a Sex and the City Cosmo for that implosion, cuz you know he’s do for one but, this is different because Yeezy just cant meltdown and ditch Kimmy Kakes like he did Alexis and Amber nope you stuck with that family for life.

  • Sofia Esqueda

    Say it! I saw this coming from miles away. Anytime someone has to reiterate how perfect their marriage is; red flags fly. I also noticed his body language with her. I never want to see a marriage end. But if that marriage is for the wrong reasons it won’t last. If there is trouble the last thing to do is to play out your personal life on national tv.

  • http://gravatar.com/missinformation7 Ms. Information

    All the women on the Housewives of Atlanta are black and they all are the breadwinners for their families (since Porscha might be off)…Kandi, Nene, Cynthia, Phaedra…they have house husbands. This is sad.

  • Natalie

    But this happened after the reunion, so it just missed that drama

  • Here and Now

    Hope Kordell and Miss Lawrence have a happy life together!

  • Solo Dolo

    Prayers to her and her family. Divorce is never easy.

  • Pingback: On Porsha’s Divorce, and Whether We’re Our Own Worst Enemies |

  • Tara

    For many black women, the son is her first and only real love. Her father was not around, her baby daddy left her. For many black women it will likely be the only unconditional love that they will ever receive from a black man. It is very unique relationship.

  • Tara

    And even though that is the case, they are just happy to have a man, And the men think they are the prize. I know a bus driver who feels he only desrves doctors or lawyers. I know two black female doctors whose husbands are low paid laborers. One told me that she would do whatever she had to do to marry a black man…..pathetic

  • Tara

    Yb. You are an idiot. What I meant by playbook is that white women get money out of divorces with black men while they HATE to part with their money with black women.

  • Ummm

    what about their daughters?

  • Lola

    Sorry but Porsha doesn’t hold her own!! She wants to live the “perfect” life by acting DZITY basically a trophy wife… NOT in this life time Porsha, you have to have your own thing going on and contribute to a marriage honey!! I believe she went into that marriage for ALL the wrong reasons! Married Rich now your on the OUTS looking in asking for spousal support. SMH!! Your able to work Porsha GO GET A JOB!

  • Anon

    Some of us really can’t stand a young good-looking married black woman, and find GLEE if things go wrong. When you are THAT happy about other folks being a “statistic”, you need to examine your own life. And, hey, at least for a while she was a stay-at-home wife who was married by 30. How many other black women are able to claim that?

  • Uncontainable Spirit

    Women ‘raise’ their daughters and ‘love’ their sons.

    Ideally the statement is, “In a family unit, Women ‘raise’ their daughters and ‘love’ their sons (while) Men ‘raise’ their sons and ‘love’ their daughters.”

    This is perfect and what actually comes naturally to each parent… when you step outside of the family unit then you get what we have currently. Women and Men still doing what comes naturally but that not being enough because the other half of the equation isn’t present.

  • Uncontainable Spirit

    Are you seriously suggesting that a man who doesn’t make as much money as his mate is a ‘loser’?

  • Uncontainable Spirit

    Maybe this is because I’m a man but… calling the man controlling because he believes in wearing the pants in the household instead of the wife, then insisting that she be a mother (being that they are both wanting a child) instead of getting a nanny to actually raise their child(ren) and chasing the dream of being a singer (a singer?) is bad?

    If that’s what controlling and possessive is, then I’m that all day. I’m the man. Period. That’s my space and that’s my function.

    BEFORE the reality TV show she had a role. She had a choice. She knew what it was. If she wanted access to him, his person, his wealth, his cache as it were then she would have to be a stay at home mom or housewife, that is it. She knew that going in. Acting on a reality show is a JOB. Now the job is opening doors… she’s not trying to close those doors. What is she going to do? What do you suggest Kordell Stewart do? It seems that Mr. Stewart was trying to get his wife to understand that to him he wasn’t interested in the type of woman who would try to handle being HIS wife, the mother of THEIR kids AND pursue her singing/television career. Essentially Mr. Stewart has the right to say that this is not the type of woman that he wants. Initially she was OK being the mother and housewife but she changed her mind. That show exposed the flaws in his marriage. He chose unwisely. He wants out. Case closed.

    She made her decision and that’s OK. He’s making his case and that’s OK too… she can do the show as a divorcee it seems. There don’t even have to be any hard feelings about it either. I’ve heard numerous women justify marrying men with money as “marriage is simply a business proposition at the end of the day” what’s love got to do with it. So when 70% of divorces are initiated by women, some of them must not feel that the business works to their benefit anymore.

    Could it be that the same thing is happening in this situation?

    Here is an example of what was called ‘controlling’.

    1. Kordell says, “No disrespect to what you are doing, I’d like you to come home earlier.” That’s controlling? He’s stating his preference to his WIFE.

    2. “Consider your time… we have talked about having kids and making some little Kordells and Porshas. Are you ready to take on this infant?” (I think that’s reasonable) Porsha replies “I would feel like when we get a baby we can get a nanny.” Kordell then asks. “So it will be raised by a nanny? That’s okay?” It’s controlling to want the mother of your children to actually raise your children? Also, he’s asking a question in plain English.

    3. Kordell took issue with Bailey. “I get so upset when you two are getting so heated.” Kordell says that the RHOA women need to “just try to be steady”. (Pretty sound advice but again… I’m a man. I don’t understand all of the cattiness either over the smallest of things.)

    While all I know is what they showed on TV (mostly via blogs and articles and even that is subject to interpretation because editing can make something seem like something else), they just don’t look like a good match at this stage of their relationship and needed to grow a bit more without the bright lights of television. This is not just because of age, even though I think that they got along well and they actually loved one another. She was young and pretty and he was rich and famous so after some laughs and some exchanging of fluid, they got married and then the show came about then it was “Oh shit, we have different views of married life.” even though it was known going in what Kordell Stewart’s expectations were AND she agreed to said expectations. She even admitted for the first year of their marriage she stayed at home and did nothing but get catered to by the staff. I truly believe that the “career woman” position was because of the show. She knew what he wanted, she agreed to it then she broke their “deal” it seems. I didn’t think he was controlling to her, he’s just plain spoken and in a time where people try so hard to come across a certain way, it can be jarring to see someone who doesn’t give a flying flip.

    Ladies, you CAN have it all, you CANNOT have it all at one time. It simply does not work. Raise your children THEN get a career. Start your career THEN have children when they have been raised a bit. If I’m a hiring manager and I have 2 women in front of me, both 31 years old with the same education and experience but 1 has a 9 year old and a 7 year old and the other has no children who do you think I’m going to hire? Exactly, the woman who already has children.

    Regarding her taking him to the bank in this divorce (if it even happens) she started cashing in on his name from the minute they got engaged. She got on that Platinum Weddings show because of their lavish wedding. She got on Housewives because of the fact that she was married to a baller and had a life of a rich housewife. Basically by marrying her, he set her up to have a better career than she would have ever had on her own. Now she can go on and do her reality shows. No one was trying to put her on TV before Kordell. He cleaned her up, got her fancy clothes and helped her launch her career. That more than compensates her for her time and service. Plus now she’s bankable and makes that RHOA check. He set her up for a life in show biz… which is clearly what she wanted. Besides, they’ve only been married 22 months. She’ll get enough to take a good vacation and go on a shopping spree and that’s about it.

    As for Kordell Stewart supposedly being gay. From my perspective, with this rumor going on over a decade, so many “knowledgeable” people, this modern age of attention whoring being at it’s peak, the fact that no one, not one person has said “Yeah, I fuck/fucked/fuck with Kordell Steward and here are the texts/emails/letters to prove it” is telling. Not one celebrity/politician that’s had some ‘issue’ on the side has been able to keep it quiet for too long. Jump-offs have been running out at light speed to get some talk show/TMZ shine. So where is Stewart’s Gay lover(s)?

  • Aight.

    No, but their drive should match. If a woman is ambitious AND has the intelligence and resources to become a doctor, shouldn’t she marry someone with similar traits? If I’m making all the money, you better be REAL passionate about something yourself!! If ur a garbage collector, be the BEST garbage collector. If u drive a bus, be the best damn bus driver on 6 wheels and air brakes.

    All of the husbands have their own careers and projects, it just so happens that the women shine brighter. (which can be a good thing). The issue with Kordell and Porsha is that they went into a marriage under traditional pretenses, then things changed when Bravo showed up with checks and cameras….

  • cb

    they ain’t getting a divorce…it’s a joke

  • http://www.lillian-mae.com Lillian Mae

    What’s wrong w/ dating a low paid laborer? Are the jobs they do less important for society? Why doesn’t a low paid worker deserve the love of a doctor or lawyer? I hear street pharmacists make a lot of money…

  • http://nevadadivorce.org Jess

    Agreed! Divorce is never good!

  • Anon

    YB, you and some others need to take the word self-hate behind the bleachers and stomp it out.

    Those women said the TRUTH. You DO see black men more willing to part with money when the ex-wife is white. You DO see white women work with man on a fixable issue… in a way designed to make him think it was his idea, and they’re (the men) less combative about these suggestions. The difference (and I think why black women have stopped these practices as a group), is that we (as a group), haven’t gotten anything in RETURN for it.

    The divorce rate is highest for each group of women when the husband is black. The divorce rates of WW have more to do with age of marriage and education attainment when the husband is white. And that’s really skewed towards the age of the husband at marriage. Across the board, women period, seem to be able to adapt to marriage at a younger age.

  • http://gravatar.com/afrosaxon1 afrosaxon1

    I pressed report comment button by accident..sorry!!

    “Ladies, you CAN have it all, you CANNOT have it all at one time. It simply does not work. Raise your children THEN get a career. Start your career THEN have children when they have been raised a bit. If I’m a hiring manager and I have 2 women in front of me, both 31 years old with the same education and experience but 1 has a 9 year old and a 7 year old and the other has no children who do you think I’m going to hire? Exactly, the woman who already has children.”

    Umm, surely that’s discrimination? You don’t know her plans, what if she doesn’t want any children…you won’t hire her because of the off chance that she MIGHT want children?

    I agree with the fist two sentences though. Women need to understand that kids are a responsibility, not a right, and if you don’t have time for them, don’t have them. Men need to understand that as well though – raising children is a 2 parent responsibility and if either parent works so much that they can’t see their kids, maybe it’s best to wait until you can be involved in your child’s life.

  • Dave

    Amen Brother

  • Uncontainable Spirit

    Thank you for your response. You said:

    “Umm, surely that’s discrimination? You don’t know her plans, what if she doesn’t want any children…you won’t hire her because of the off chance that she MIGHT want children?”

    There is discrimination in ALL facets of life. There is definitely discrimination in the job market. It simply is. Why cannot a 25 year old be the President of the USA? Is that discrimination? Why do insurance premiums drop because an individual turns 25 years old? Is that discrimination? Regarding the employment discrimination, employers discriminate constantly. Employers are FAR more likely to hire a married man than a single man. That’s discrimination however it’s understood. Employers are far more likeThere are a multitude of examples of acceptable discrimination that we simply deem valid because in most instances they are. To be discriminating is not necessarily a bad thing.

    “I agree with the fist two sentences though. Women need to understand that kids are a responsibility, not a right, and if you don’t have time for them, don’t have them. Men need to understand that as well though – raising children is a 2 parent responsibility and if either parent works so much that they can’t see their kids, maybe it’s best to wait until you can be involved in your child’s life.”

    I agree. I see no flaw in this position.

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