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Two years ago, some friends and I witnessed a woman get punched in the face by a man just off Bourbon Street in New Orleans. While we immediate went to her aid, the man simply stepped over her like she was trash and merged with the crowd while his friend filmed the entire scene.

What provoked the attack? She refused to give him her phone number and he snapped.

Back in college, my roommate, her cousin, and I road tripped to the Bay Area during Spring Break. On our way to a tiny nightclub in Oakland, my roommate’s cousin gave us one piece of advice: “If a man asks you to dance, just do it. They punch girls up here.”

I was reminded of these stories yesterday when I read about a 19-year-old woman in the UK who is trying to piece her life back together after being bashed in the head with a champagne bottle when she turned down a man’s advances at a nightclub. Although she escaped with her life (thankfully), doctors had to insert a plate into her jaw and she no longer goes out because she doesn’t feel safe.

These incidents are not unique; they happen way too often. And although it would be nice to believe that a spurned man would deal with rejection like a grown up or have sensible friends who could convince him to just move on to the next woman, this isn’t always the case.

Women have lost lives and/or been seriously injured at the hands of men they did not know simply because they were not interested in a conversation.

Which begs the question, what can we do?

If we cannot rely on the man’s own common sense, or his friends, or bystanders to step up, how can we women best protect ourselves from being assaulted by some idiot with a fragile ego?

I’m asking for real, Clutchettes.

Tell us how you deal with harassment; you may just save a woman’s life.  

50 Comments

  1. kkait

    Ummmm I know not the whole point of the article but why the f*** would your cousin take you to a club where your only option is dance with an aggressive stranger or get beat?!!! NOT my idea of a fun night. A lot of things are out of womens control but knowinly going to a club that is dangerous just seems like a stupid idea if you ask me.

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    • Anthony

      @kkait, your post reminds me of a discussion I had with a friend in grad school. He was telling me about a club so rough, he might need a gun to go there. I told him, if you need a gun, you don’t need to go.

      If a club has a reputation for tolerating violent men, women need to boycott it ASAP! Believe me, if men know there will be no women, they will quickly get rid of the trouble makers.

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  2. Peachy

    It is proven fact that men are afraid of “crazy” women. If all else fails, act crazy! I’m serious, it works. At the train station last year, some dude call out to me when I walked by him. While waiting for my stop, I kept eying him from my side and saw him walking up towards me. He came up to me and said he wanted to “talk to me”. I kept scooting over and he kept getting closer and started following me. I let out a big shriek (I seriously yelled) and started running around in the station saying “Leave me alone!” The guy took off and some people around me were yelling out to him. This is a bit extreme, but I’m sure the embarrassment would have him thinking twice next time he approaches a women. Embarrass the man and make him look bad. Shout out and say something bizarre such as, “Don’t rob me! or scream in fear so that onlookers will be alerted to your harassment. Even if he is just asking for your number, divert the attention around and make it seem like he is trying to harm you. Shout out, “I’m going to call the police!”. Men now don’t take no for an answer and don’t know when to leave us alone. Mess with me and I will embarrass you. I have tried everything that I am mentioning and it has all worked so far. It may sound a bit crazy, but that is the whole objective lol.

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