Black-couple-in-bed-II

Here’s a novel idea for a 3rd, 4th, or 5th date– sexual health testing.

By sexual health, we’re talking testing for STIs and STDs.

Medically, an STI is an infection first, after it causes symptoms, the infection becomes a disease. An STD – sexually transmitted disease – is an infection that has symptoms. STIs can be passed from one person to another – even when there are no symptoms. We want women to understand that they are just as likely to get an STI from someone with no symptoms as from someone with symptoms. It is also a lot easier to prevent getting most STIs than it is to treat most STDs.

A closer look at statistics show that women and minorities carry most of the burden of sexually transmitted infections in the U.S., according to the Centers for Disease Control. Not only are complex, long-standing issues of health disparities among minorities to blame for this disproportionate impact, but simple female anatomy remains a risk factor as well.

Virtually everyone, at least theoretically, is risking their health with a new sexual partner. But how and when do you bring up the conversation of sexual health when you’re in the beginning stages of getting to know someone?  I doubt many people carry around medical records on dates, so it’s not like a person can pull test results out of their wallet.  If you’re comfortable enough with the person is there anything wrong with asking to take a trip to the doctor’s office?  Even once the results are back, there’s still no guarantee that everything’s good to go. So then it comes down to a matter of trust.

Clutchettes, before having sex with a new partner, do you request sexual health test results? If not, when & how do you approach the subject?

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  • V

    I made the mistake of having unprotected sex with a now ex of mine and ended up with chlamydia. The infection/disease can also be spread through skin to skin contact so they have been the culprit aswell. I took my medication and I no longer have the infection but that experience really shook me. Since our breakup I havent dated anyone but going forward I know I want to wait to have sex until I feel very confident and secure in the relationship which will include sit/std testing before any sexual contact. If my parter doesnt agree or respect my standards PEACE! Sexual health is not a joke for me. There has be open dialogue about these issues because slapping a condom on will not always protect you…

    • Anon

      Please if you don’t mind, explain how it is transmitted if you did not have penetration? I did not know that. Thank you.

    • 9Boots

      STDs can be transmitted via oral sex

    • 9Boots

      @Courtney

      Not only am I giving you a major side eye, I’m giving you an eye roll and I’m looking at you crossed eyed. Apparently you don’t know the definition of the word ‘trauma’ so let me enlighten you.

      Merriam-Webster
      trauma noun
      : a very difficult or unpleasant experience that causes someone to have mental or emotional problems usually for a long time

      Full Definition of TRAUMA

      1 a: an injury (as a wound) to living tissue caused by an extrinsic agent
      b: a disordered psychic or behavioral state resulting from severe mental or emotional stress or physical injury
      c : AN EMOTIONAL UPSET
      2: an agent, force, or mechanism that causes trauma

      Do you have any idea how many grown women and young girls are walking around clinically depressed and with extremely low self esteem because they have been USED for their bodies even though they consented to sex and thought they were emotionally “ready”? You can live in denial land all you want but I showed you the facts of the physical consequences of sex above and you have the audacity to gloss over it and say “marriage is not what prevents STDs – monogamy, honesty and regular testing is”. How the heck do you think all of these STDs are get passed around? Do you think these STDs are being passed around by people that wait until they are married to have sex? Do you think these STDs are being passed around by married people that have one sex partner their entire life? Do you think everyone is honest and states who they are having sex with and that they have a disease? Obviously not! STDs are being transmitted all over the place because people have multiple sex partners whether it is one partner for a moment and then moving on to the next or having multiple sex partners on rotation all at once. It is plastered all over the pl

      And another thing, anybody can have sex, it just requires a functioning body. But how many people can place sex in the proper context so that it does not cause harm to others. Good luck.ace that having multiple sex partners is considered HIGH RISK. Do you have any idea what will happen when the cure for these diseases become ineffective? Let me give you a clue. 25 million people world wide have died from AIDS in just 32 years. 33.4 million people world wide have HIV!

      In addition, your lame comment saying “sexual compatibility is an absolutely MUST for me, and I think it actually is a hindrance for many to save themselves for marriage because compatibility can’t be forced.”. Do you know there are dogs, lions, horses, elephants, and monkeys that have been trained to do tricks? Clearly a man can be taught how to please you. So please save your sorry behind excuses as to why you have no self control and choose not to value the more important things in life such as a real commitment that is till death do us part. If anyone here is irrational it is not me the religious one…IT’S YOU. So you can keep swimming laps in the STD cesspool while swapping sex partners to find the “compatible one” all you want. BTW let me know how positive HIV, HERPES, and HPV test results end up curing someone from the disease after it’s been contracted…Oh that’s right, get testing does not cure the disease. Now go do your own darn research and get a clue. Start with the CDC.

    • 9Boots

      To add to that …condoms do not protect against the emotional and psychological trauma that comes with the issues of premarital sex.

    • “Trauma?” Having sex outside of marriage – for those of us who CAN and WANT to get married – is not what causes any trauma. Having sex before you are ready can. Having sex against your will, definitely. But not having a paper legally decreeing you as betrothed? No.

      I am a very sexual person. Sexual compatibility is an absolutely MUST for me, and I think it actually is a hindrance for many to save themselves for marriage because compatibility can’t be forced.

      I upvoted your previous comment but gave a major side-eye to the book you recommended. Religion has a peculiar way of being rather unobjective and irrational about sex. Marriage is not what prevents STDs – monogamy, honesty and regular testing is.

    • I feel I was respectful in my response to you, even though I disagreed. I will not engage you because clearly, you lack the ability to do the same.