Cole Haan Penny loafers, crisp cuffed trousers, a chambray shirt and vintage YSL briefcase are his closet staples. He’s the type of guy not afraid to rock an assortment of accessories—rings on each finger, piled-on beaded bracelets and an oversized ankh pendant on a chain. The kind of guy who knows that a pocket square is not a snack you heat up in the microwave. We’re talking about the dapper dudes who add a sexy urban twist to classic and collegiate menswear. The kind you find featured on a street-style blog like Brooklyn Circus or Street Etiquette. We’ve all seen them. And now you’re dating one.

The two of you met at a local coffee shop and your chemistry was instant. You were immediately drawn to the way his personal style reflected his irresistible charm and effortless swagger. Colorful bowties, linen shorts, cardigans in slim silhouettes—each ensemble is injected with some ounce of creativity and individuality. He’s always dressed impeccably. In other words, his game is on point.

As for you? Well, your sense of style has always been more . . . safe. It’s not as ummm, eclectic. You’re more of a stick-to-basics kind of gal.  You know, skinny jeans, v-neck sweaters, the occasional little black dress and heels. It has always suited you just fine. Until now. You want to turn heads together, not walk in your man’s shadow. But how can you possibly keep up?

There’s no reason why we all can’t take a few styling cues from the boys . . . even if they happen to be our boyfriends. If what’s holding you back from experimenting and being more adventurous with your look is, well, you, there’s no harm in turning to your man. Ask him what he’d like to see you in. After your lunch date, take him on one of your thrifting excursions. Try outfits on in front of him—with sexy under-things for his viewing pleasure. If all else fails, just raid his closet! His tweed vest will pair seamlessly with your riding boots. And his new Men’s COACH messenger with your slim cropped pants? Ahhh, a match made in heaven, just like you and your guy.

But with that said, let’s face it. No man wants to date his twin. While the pressure might be there, it’s not necessary to mirror his impeccable sense of style. He was a fan of what you were wearing when you two first started dating, so stay true to who you are. Whether it’s you, your dude, or both who stop traffic, if you have a solid relationship it shouldn’t matter how stylish you two dress. (Now, that’s not to say a little effort here and there isn’t nice to keep the spice alive.) Because at the end of the day, that Rugby oxford shirt and those J.Crew chinos are ending up on your bedroom floor.

What’s your take, ladies?! How would you feel if your man dressed better than you? Sound off!

-Audra E. Lord

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  • I love love love the way these men dress. For those of you saying it’s too much. Check out some pictures of your grandparents and great-grandparents. It was common for blk men and women to but work into how they look. It was about taking pride in your appearance.

  • There is another blk dandy blog

    love his blog.

  • Ok you know,I’m 43 so in my 20’s had a certain swaggar and appeal about my attire.Back then we cats rocked Ballys,British Walkers,Cazals,Vercase Shades to impress others and our selves.Sheepskins,Leather Bombers Jackets so we Black folks likes to dress ghetto fabulous to feel good about ourselves.Trust me,this young generation is follwing and setting up and new trend in urban styling.

  • Ky

    Its the opposite for me. I have an eclectic funky style all my own. But the kind of men attracted to me are, more plain. I would love to walk down the streets with my guy and watch as we turn heads together. But what I have realized is that some (not all) guys who do follow this “classic and collegiate menswear” trend are empty on the inside and mostly absorbed in how they can acquire more of these labels. That consumer mentality is so opposite of my own way of thinking. I’m more of a producer. So as for me, I don’t mind turning heads alone or turning heads on account of myself while holding hands with my regular-looking regular-dressing man friend.