“When you’re doing well in life, it’s par for the course certain individuals will try and knock you down,” former Family Matters star Jaleel White said in a recent statement about the very public claims made by his ex-girlfriend Bridget Hary that he was physically and verbally abusive during the course of their relationship.

Although only White and Hary know what actually happened, it’s certainly not an unfamiliar story. Almost inevitably, your ex-boo hurt you and before you know it, they’ve moved on, not only with their love life, but they seem to be succeeding in every other aspect of life as well. And it just seems so unfair.

I never realized that Karma doesn’t always work when you want her too until I had my first real heartbreak in high school. Back then, I learned that she has her own schedule.

When I was a freshman, I had the biggest crush on the same guy for three months and it was no secret amongst my group of small girlfriends, which is why I was shocked when I spotted one of them holding his hand at lunch over chicken fingers and fries. I cringed at the sight, ran out of the cafeteria and vented to my other friends that she was officially out of the circle.  She had done the unthinkable, and surely karma would come her way, right?

But it didn’t. My ex-friend went on to be my crush’s girlfriend for over a year, she succeeded in her academics and sports and had a great time doing it all. The worse part about it is that although she did later apologize to me, there was nothing genuine about her regret. I don’t think she was ever really sorry or cared about my feelings one bit. She only said it to make herself feel better. Either way I was hurt by the entire thing and said a silent prayer that she would learn her lesson even if I never got a front row seat to witness the payback.

Although that was a long time ago and I’d forgotten all about it, recently an old high school friend brought it all back up, telling me that my ex-bestie had married early, but was in the middle of an ugly divorce. And while I didn’t get any joy from the news of her heartbreak (it was high school after all)–or feel anything at all for that matter—I wondered if her situation was karma rearing its head.

Whether it’s the married man that cheats on his wife with seemingly no consequences, the parent who abandons their child, the backstabber at work, or the man or woman who broke your heart so bad that you’re convinced you’ll never be in love again, don’t seek revenge, wish them harm or even get mad at their supposed successes.

Bid them adieu, let go of the pain they caused you, and move on.

In the end, the Universe never forgets, and your big sister Karma will be waiting.

Someone once said, “don’t seek revenge on the people who did you wrong, God can take care of them far better than you can.”

And I certainly agree with that.

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  • apple

    Um I don’t think that was karma as thr result of you. Had that same boyfriend say cheated on her with a friend maybe. Or maybe had you Been married to him and then he married her and had an ugly divorce thats karma. I think you’re just happy something. Anything happened to her

    • binks

      Agreed, this was not an example of karma. And to be honest the guy was free game…IJS but I do believe you get what you put out there be it good or bad it’s just a matter of time so I do believe in karma a bit but like Hopechest said below I don’t think karma is meant to be used as a weapon

  • HopeChest

    Karma is simply cause and effect.

    I feel like the author is using Karma as some kinda weapon, like an AK-47.

    In the Buddhist practice, Karma happens to all of us, be it good or bad. One could be dealing with Karma from a past life.

    But instead of taking it as it is, these situations can be turned into something positive.

    Like ‘turning poison into medicine, if you will.

  • Isis

    Im still on the fence about karma. The only way I can believe it exists is in the sense that buddhists and hindus explain it. Sometimes ur karma is from a past life. Its the only way to explain why bad ppl win and good ppl suffer. If there is no rebirth/reincarnation than karma doesnt exist imo

    • HopeChest

      You raise a very good point, Isis.

      A lot of what you’re talking about has a lot to do with the difference between Western-Abrahamic Organized religion and Eastern philosophy.

      WAOR is more linear when it comes to the human existence, meaning that there’s a beginning and an end (birth=death).

      Whereas, EP is more cyclic, meaning that it’s a continuum to the human existence (birth=death=rebirth).

      EP is what makes more sense to me than the former. I’ve always felt that way.

      What you put out there in the Universe is what you’re gonna get back.

      That’s Karma :)

    • OSHH

      That’s called iniquity in the Holy bible, sin debt from generations past, not you but in your bloodline, like things your Grandparents ,or Great grand, Great great grand did etc

      However these things can be halted/debt paid/cancelled.

  • HopeChest

    I love seeing the two perspectives from each faith in this discussion :)

  • Alexandria

    Your article was well written and I enjoyed the topic. I always wondered if karma was real or not. Maybe it is.

    • HopeChest

      karma is real.