Living together before marriage is an age-old conundrum for most couples. In this day and age, more couples are exchanging keys before vows but there are still those rare couples that put marriage before cohabitation. Tamera Mowry Housely and husband Fox News Anchor Adam Housely did, and according to her, they made the right decision.

Tamera told Ebony Magazine she does not believe couples should live together before marriage:

“[Living together] makes it harder for you. Have people around you to keep you accountable! Surround yourself with people who support your decision, because they’re only going to root you on. Make that covenant with God and with each other and just let go. God is going to see you through the difficult times. Whenever you’re feeling discouraged just pray together. Like I said, it’s not going to be a perfect journey, but you just have to keep God the center of your relationship.”

While the no shacking rule seemed to work for them, not everyone think it’s effective or even smart. Most of my friends fully support cohabitation. My recently-divorced male friend says it’s good to get to “know a person before [you] marry them.” To avoid “relationship purgatory,” wherein you play the roles of husband and wife without being married, he says to set ground rules: “Say we’re moving in to increase our knowledge of one another and by [a designated] time, we’ll make a move.”

Conversely, my married female friend feels it’s a one way trip to never getting married. “There’s no incentive to commit.” “If you’re not married and living together, breakups get really sticky when it’s time to split assets,” she adds.

What are your thoughts, Clutchettes? Should couples live together before marriage? Is shacking up before marriage a good way to learn about your partner? Will it help or hurt the relationship in the long run?

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  • Pema

    I totally agree with her. Stop giving everything away. I did live with my husband for a few months before we got married (his lease was up so it kind of made since and we were planning a wedding). My parents were so livid that they barely spoke to us until a few weeks before the wedding.

  • Jojo

    she must be a republican saying nonsense like that. if one plans to commit a lifetime living under the same roof, then why not test the territory?

  • Nia

    Agreed! The everything goes nature of mainstream culture gets a lot of us nowhere. I can’t tell you how many girls I know that end up stuck in this kind of situation for years – wanting to get married – but their man has zero incentive. Better to enter a commitment wholeheartedly through marriage and build a real life together than half step.