Nia Long is currently making the rounds promoting her new movie The Single Moms Club, which is the new Tyler Perry movie that doesn’t include Madea. On Friday’s Oprah’s Lifeclass, Long spoke about being a single mother with Iyanla Vanzant and Oprah. One of the subjects they touched upon was dating as a single mother. Long discussed a first date that changed her mind about when is the appropriate time to introduce a child to the person you’re dating:
“I actually do have a funny story. My son was a bout two. I had just broken up with his dad and I said, ‘You know what? I’m going to go out and I am going to reclaim my sexy!’ This gentleman came and I said, let’s do a group date. I didn’t want to do a one-on-one thing. Let’s do a group date. So I called my sister and I said, ‘You’re going on my first date with me.’ I was living in New York at the time. We walk out of the apartment, he’s in this big truck like a Suburban, but it was a driver and a car. And I was like, ‘Oh he’s fancy.’ We get in the car and my 2-year-old goes, ‘My daddy has a big ol’ blue truck and it’s faster than this one!’ I just went ‘Oh my goodness.’ So they know. They know. Even when you try to hide it, when you try to pretend like, ‘This is just mommy’s friend’ they know. That guy didn’t last so him and his truck went bye bye, but what it did teach me was to introduce kind of early.”
As a single mother, I tend to take a different stance on when to introduce someone to a child. On a recent column for The Root , I wrote about dating as a single parent and the precautions a single mother or dad should make before introductions. Personally, I don’t rush into introducing someone to my son, and for as long as I’ve been dating, he’s only met two people and that was months after dating and a monogamous relationship was established.
Clutchettes, when do you think a child should be introduced to their parent’s boyfriend or girlfriend?