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Is it just me or do the things people put on IG these days make you feel like its 2004 again and Facebook just came out for the first time? Remember back then when every thought you had and everything you did deserved a post? Well now that Facebook has become the social media gathering place of baby boomers, I think it’d be safe to say Instagram has become the spot where bitter exes come to thrive.

Yesterday the Internet was abuzz with shadiness when Sage the Gemini ex-fiance put the rapper on blast for allegedly cheating on her with Jordin Sparks. Suddenly, the fans who were excited Jordin found a new boo after the tragedy that was her relationship with Jason Derulo were questioning whether the wholesome “American Idol” winner was a homewrecker. Meanwhile, I’m at home looking at the ex like, where did you come from?

In some ways I get it. When a man does you wrong you want to tell any and everybody who’ll listen, from your mama to the mailman who simply passed you on the street and asked, “how you doin’?” But the question is, what are you really accomplishing in telling the world a man has done you wrong? It certainly doesn’t mask the bitterness lurking within you; if anything, it brings it to the surface.

Take Blac Chyna for instance. Everyone outside the Kardashian family knows Tyga’s relationship with Kylie is all types of wrong for a number of reasons — not the least of which is her age — but what does posting text messages he sent trying to get back with you on Instagram do for your life? Does it change the fact that you’re still a single mother? Does it change the fact that he’s still dating a 17-year-old? Does it change the fact that you’re still not together? The answer to all of the above is no. What it does do is prove you got involved and procreated with a man of very shady character who likely wasn’t s-h-i-t all along. So along with questioning his character, the whole world is now also questioning your judgement. And checking your bitter vitals.


See the real motive in these women putting the men on blast is often to (a) prove someone is still checking for them and (b) get back at the women who are now the object of these men’s affection. Again, I get it. There’s no greater satisfaction than when a man who left us comes crawling back trying to come home, but can you share that with your girlfriends instead of the world? And spare me the whole, “I just thought she should know” logic women use for putting cheaters on blast in very public forums. If you want me to know my man is foul, send me an email. Don’t mention me on social media with more hashtags than a little bit. Furthermore, if the man in question is as trifling as claimed, the new woman likely already knows or will find out soon through her own means. You don’t need to be involved.

It’s easy to get caught up in messy love triangles, especially among the rich and famous, but at the end of the day this whole rise of the bitter IG ex trend is just a flat out mess. And beyond still trying to prove your worth to a bunch of random people who happen to like your selfies, these types of moves reek of an attempt to get on in some kind of way, mostly because the bar has been set so low these days for who’s a “celebrity” or person of interest to the masses who spend their Monday nights engulfed in “Love & Hip-Hop” drama and Tuesday-Sunday stalking those broken individuals’ social media accounts. I personally say, save the drama for your mama. You want to get over a relationship with someone who wasn’t worth your time in the first place? Stop talking about him! Period. Your mental health and Instagram will be better for it.

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  • [email protected]

    People should move forward, but no one should tolerate fraudulent behavior no matter what.

  • paintgurl40

    Personally I get it. People are usually mad because one person has already moved on already seeing someone else, and the other is alone and pissed. The best way to get back at an ex is to be happy and live your life. The next time he/she sees you, you should be smiling and ACTING like your life is SO MUCH better since that person left. Don’t let the ex see you alone and bitter! That means that they’ve won.

    • [email protected]

      That’s excellent advice Sister.

  • binks

    Honestly, it is easy to “not move on” in today’s social media world and the dating scene. Think about it, back in the day when you broke up with someone it was easier to get over because you could avoid and ignore the person and drama was through the “grapevine” while you got over your breakup but now with Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc. it difficult because people are so bold and extra by being quick to run online with their situation, do anything for buzz especially if they are involved with someone in the spotlight or well known, want to be messy, other people commenting on the drama, the online stalking of said ex and new boo, etc. it NEVER ends. It is hard to have a clean break when you are still tied to the person online. But I agree I think situation like the one above is just doing too much. You are an “ex” for a reason move on with your life and find your happiness and love. There are over 7 billion people in the world someone will gladly be with this young lady in a minute because doing all of this isn’t hurting or making him or his new girl look foolish but YOU.