Before Raven-Symoné became the bane of everyone’s existence, one of the greatest memes on the Internet was the one with Olivia saying “Dudes be like can you cook. I be like, can you build a house?” The text was short but the context ran deep as the ocean blue as just one example of how men, dare we say black men specifically, expect the world from women and bring little, if anything, to the table.
Even if some black men are the closest any of us will ever see to perfection, there continues to be this Instagram community of brothas so quick to point out black women’s flaws and even compare them to women of other races who they feel are superior. Essentially it’s the case for dating outside of one’s race personified in a meme and, personally, we’re over it.
Take the image above which you don’t even have to engage beyond the tagline at the end, “Black girls suck, Asian women are the superior choice” to know there’s a serious problem. The meme has been making it’s way around IG, shared by overeager brothers who have forgotten their moms and sister are black girls too, reducing us to the racial stereotypes we hoped only white men would uphold in 2016.
But lo and behold, here we are being deemed hypersexual, attitudinal, masculine creatures by our very own men at the same time mainstream magazines are finally seeing strong, muscular bodies like that of Serena Williams and Misty Copeland’s beautiful. What’s wrong with this picture?
Well, what’s primarily wrong is self-hate and group think. As much as we talk about racism and tricks of the white elite, it amazes us how often black men fall into these traps. Rather than shut down these types of overgeneralized fallacies, they repost and share as a co-sign that they agree with the sentiments shared, leaving us to fend for ourselves and them (hello Black Lives Matter, but that’s another topic altogether).
For once, we’d like to see men report memes like this, create new memes exposing the lies of memes like this, and support the unwaveringly faithful black women whose timelines are filled with messages about black kings and holding brothas down, only to be told they’re inferiority to another minority. Never is there an understanding that perhaps we have attitudes because we spend 90% of our day defending ourselves and our men. Or that our bodies are masculine because we’re doing the labor our men should be doing, if only they weren’t dating other women or behind bars or dead. Or that the “sexy talk” vernacular deemed ghetto is the very same language that seeps into the mainstream day by day and is appropriated by our white counterparts. We won’t even get into the idea of our features being too large — especially when they’re the same African traits our brothers have but that seem to be forgotten once a non-black woman gives them a chance.
All we’re saying is it would be nice for someone to have our back. For memes like this to stop being circulated before we even see them and have a chance to react. For black men to stop drinking the self-hating kool-aid and refuse to participate in the destruction of black women and our beauty. There’s a reason memes like this are far more prevalent on the internet than images of black women tearing down black men. If brothas stopped to think about that for a second, we bet they’d be far less apt to share a silly picture like this again.